Posts Tagged With: burger

Swedish Saffransbröd

Posted on December 23, 2015 by pauldelancey

Swedish Dessert

SAFFRANSBRÖD

INGREDIENTSSaffranBrod-

2¼ teaspoons yeast
⅓ cup warm water
1 cup milk
½ cup butter
¼ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon sugar (½ cup more later)
½ teaspoon (1 gram) saffron threads
⅓ cup raisins
½ cup sugar
2 eggs (1 more egg later)
4 cups flour (2 more tablespoons later)
2 tablespoons flour
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSILS

tin foil
cookie sheet

Makes 4 6″ buns. Takes 2 hours 40 minutes.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 250 degrees. Add yeast and water to large mixing bowl. While yeast dissolves, add milk to small pot. Heat milk at high heat until scalding hot (almost boiling). Stir constantly. Reduce heat to medium. Add butter, salt, and 1 teaspoon sugar to pot. Stir constantly until butter melts. Remove from heat.

Add saffron to tin foil. Bake at 250 for 5 minutes or until saffron is toasted. Add toasted saffron to cup. Crush saffron with fingers. Add 1 teaspoon sugar to cup. Mix with fork. Add crushed saffron/sugar to mixing bowl with dissolved yeast. Add 2 eggs, raisins, ½ cup sugar, and buttery milk to mixing bowl. Stir in 4 cups flour, one cup a time. Mix with whisk or fork.

Dust cutting board with 2 tablespoons flour. Add dough to cutting board. Let dough stand for 10 minutes. Knead with hands until dough stiffens. Add oil and dough to large bowl. Turn dough until it is coated with oil. Cover and let rise for 1 hour or until dough doubles in size.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Divide dough into 12 pieces. Use hands to turn each piece into a 12″ rope. Put 3 ropes side by side. Braid the 3 ropes together by crossing the left rope and then the right rope over the center rope until there is one long braid. Join ends of long braid to make a circle or crown. Repeat to make three more crowns. Beat one egg. Brush egg over crowns.
Spray cookie sheet with no-stick spray. Place crowns on parchment-covered cookie sheet. Let crowns rise for 15 minutes or until they puff up into a bun. Bake for 15-to-25 minutes or until golden brown and when a toothpick inserted into buns comes out clean. Let cool on rack.

TIDBITS

1) Böard is Swedish for surfboard. Yes, surfboards were invented by the Swedish baker, Franf. For in 1618, Franf found a large tree trunk washed up on shore. The tree was of a sort unknown to Europe. Franf reasoned it must have come from a large continent to the west.

2) He announced his discovery to the Swedish court and asked royal packing for a proposed voyage of discovery. The Swedish king said Franf was an idiot, noting Christopher Columbus had discovered the New World in 1492, in addition to Basque fishermen, Viking explorers, the third-grade class of Stockholm’s very own Lutefisk academy, Chinese traders, and the people of the great migration across the land bridge from Siberia to Alaska.

3) Franf wondered why entire tribes would assemble in frozen Siberia and then trek eastward into howling blizzards to an unknown land. Perhaps they really had a hankering for a White CastleTM burger. Those tiny delights with their minced onions are really tasty. Perhaps the ancient trekkers honestly thought there be a White Castle in the new land, just like the Spanish conquistadors and their Seven Cities of Gold. We’ll never know. Researchers are still waiting for the Cliff NotesTM to come out.

4) Franf waited patiently for the above long tidbit to end, before he could go home.

5) He moped for countless seconds–there were no stopwatches in 1618–before rebounding with the boundless optimism of all Post-Renaissance Swedish bakers.

6) Fraf went to a dock, sat down, pulled out his pipe, lit a match, and commenced to day dreaming. His long reddish beard burst into a fireball of flame; not applying the burning match to the pipe was a mistake. Howling with pain, Franf dove into the bay to put out the fire.

7) Flame extinguished, Franf immediately inventoried certain gaps in his education and there were many. However, the one that consistently came to the forefront was not learning to swim. Thank goodness, the tree trunk from the first tidbit, by now worn down to a thin board, was right next to him. (Notice the neat foreshadowing?)

8) Franf climbed onto the board and sat down to think. Here he was sitting in Sweden, the top of world, when suddenly, in geological terms, he caught a wave. “Häftig,” he shouted, “this is totally awesome!” People gathered on the shore as Franf rode one rörformig wave after another. They joined in. Surfing totally rocked Sweden. It was totally tubular, man.

11) Then the Thirty Years war broke out. Thousands and thousands of surfing Swedes lost their lives in the battlefields of Germany, never again to catch that perfect Baltic Sea wave. Surfing died out in that no longer care free Nordic land.

12) But Franf is still remembered in the vibrant culinary, surfing world. This recipe is called Saffransbröd, in anagrammic remembrance, of Franf’s böard.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Tuna Burgers

Posted on February 7, 2015 by pauldelancey

American Entree

TUNA BURGERS

INGREDIENTSTunaBurger-

2 6-ounce cans white tuna
1 celery stalk
½ small onion
1 Roma tomato
½ cup bread crumbs
1 egg
½ teaspoon dill
½ teaspoon parsley
½ tablespoon lemon juice
½ cup mayonnaise
1 tablespoon minced red bell pepper
1 tablespoon olive oil
4 hamburger buns
4 lettuce leaves
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

no-stick skillet
anti-grav machine

Takes about 20 minutes.

PREPARATION

Drain tuna cans. Mince celery and onion. Cut tomato lenghthwise into 4 equal slices. Add tuna, breadcrumbs, celery, dill, parsley, and egg in large mixing bowl. Mix thoroughly with fork. Add lemon juice, mayonnaise, onion, and bell pepper. Mix again with fork. Form 4 tuna patties by hand.

Toast hamburger buns. Spray skillet with no-stick spray. Add olive oil. Heat oil on medium heat. Add tuna patties. Sauté on medium heat for 3-to-5 minutes per side or until cooked through and golden brown. Add tuna patties, lettuce, and tomato to bottom bun then add top bun. (If you have an anti-grav machine you can place the tomato, lettuce, and tuna patty under a hovering top bun, then put the bottom bun under all of that.)

TIDBITS

1) Anti-grav devices have non-culinary uses as well. The one most prized by the military is being able to stop an accidentally dropped bomb from falling. However, dogs generally don’t like the anti-grave machine. It keeps table scraps from falling to the kitchen floor. In fact, their union, Dogs, successfully lobbied to keep the anti-grav thingy from being sold in America. You have to go to Mexico or Mozambique or know a defense contractor to get one.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Lamb Burger

Posted on January 28, 2015 by pauldelancey

New Zealander Entree

LAMB BURGER

INGREDIENTSLambBurger-

1 small onion
1 Roma tomato
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 pound ground lamb
½ teaspoon lemon zest
½ teaspoon marjoram
1½ tablespoons mayonnaise
1 teaspoon mint, crushed
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon rosemary
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
1 avocado
4 hamburger buns
4 lettuce leaves
4 slices beetroot (Optional? Depends on whom you ask.)

PREPARATION

Cut onion and tomato into thin slices. Add onion and olive oil to skillet. Sauté for 5 minutes on medium-high heat or until onion softens. Add lamb, lemon zest, marjoram, mayonnaise, mint, pepper, rosemary, and Worcestershire sauce to large mixing bowl. Mix with hands.

Make four patties. Fry patties at medium-high heat with lid on for about 6 minutes or until the insides of the patties are done to the desired level of pinkness or brownness. Flip patties once.

While patties are cooking, cut tomato into ⅛” thick slices. Peel avocado and remove pit. Cut avocado into four slices lengthwise. Toast hamburger buns. Put a patty on bottom bun. Put tomato and sautéed onion slices and 1 lettuce leaf on each patty. Top with beetroot slice, if desired. Add top bun. Combine the bottom and top parts of the burger. Repeat for the next 3 burgers.

TIDBITS

1) Sheep is an anagram for . . . sheep. Lamb is an anagram for balm. Lambs do not use lip balm. They do not have opposable thumbs, so they can’t hold the tubes of lip balm.

2) Sheep can be shorn for their wool. Wool makes nice clothes and blankets for people to use. People get haircuts. However, sheep do not wear wigs made from human hair, not even if they wonder what it would be like to be a redhead.

3) Law enforcement can track you with your cell phone’s GPS. Smart sheep can do the same, so Mary’s little lamb doesn’t need to follow Mary anymore. This is why you don’t hear the nursery rhyme anymore.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Spam Burger From Hawaii

Posted on July 19, 2013 by pauldelancey

Hawaiian Entree

SPAM BURGER

INGREDIENTSSpamBurger-

3 cloves garlic
1 cup brown sugar
2 tablespoons lemon juice
3/4 cup pineapple juice
2 tablespoons red wine
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 12 ounce can SPAM

4 pineapple rings
4 slices mild cheddar cheese
4 lettuce leaves
4 hamburger buns

SPECIAL UTENSIL

electric skillet

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Put garlic, brown sugar, lemon juice, pineapple juice, red wine, soy sauce, water, and cornstarch in large mixing bowl. Stir with whisk or fork until brown sugar dissolves and cornstrach blends in. Cut SPAM into 8 strips. Add SPAM. Let SPAM marinate for 60 minutes.

Set skillet to 350 degrees. Put SPAM strips and pineapple rings in skillet. Fry for 4 minutes. Turn over SPAM and pineapple. Add cheese slices. Fry for another 4 minutes.

While SPAM strips and pineapple rings are frying, add marinade to frying pan. Simmer for 8 minutes on low heat, stirring constantly.

Put 2 SPAM strips with melted cheese on bottom buns. Ladle as much cooked marinade on top as desired. (If you desire a lot of sticky marinade, may I suggest a lot of napkins.) Add lettuce and complete with top hamburger bun.

Left over sauce goes great with stir fry.

TIDBITS

1) The derivation of the term “spam” for torrents of unsolicited e-mail and posts comes from a Monty Python skit where a diner serves SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, and more SPAM. This skit can be seen on YouTubeTM via the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anwy2MPT5RE

2) While tidbit 1) advanced the cause of literature and the arts, the following tidbits will extol SPAM’s contribution to culinary history.

3) SPAM was first canned in 1937. It’s jingle was: “SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, Hormel’s new miracle meat in a can. Saves time, tastes fine, to eat something grand as for SPAM.”

4) SPAM featured in soldiers’ meal during World War II as it is a good source of protein and is easy to eat. Famous people have spoken out about Spam.

“Without SPAM we wouldn’t have been able to feed our army.”
– Russian President Nikita Kruschev

“SPAM was a war-time delicacy.”
– Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher

“I ate my share of SPAM along with millions of other soldiers, I’ll even confess to a few unkind words about it – uttered during the strain of battle you understand. But as the former commander-in-chief of the allied forces, I believe I can still officially forgive you for your only sin: sending us so much of it.”
– President Dwight D. Eisenhower.

5) The SPAM Museum is Austin, Minnesota, “SPAM Town, USA.” Admission is free.

6) In 1989,Americans purchased 1,750 tons of SPAM. Purchases for other years is apparently a secret.

7) Hawaii has the largest per capita consumption of SPAM in the world. These islanders acquired their love for SPAM during World War II when millions of soldiers, marines, and seamen stationed there were fed vast amounts of SPAM.

8) There is an annual SPAM Jam block party in Waikiki. McDonald’s restaurants in Hawaii include SPAM, eggs, and rice on its breakfast menu.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Safari Burger From Kenya

Posted on July 7, 2013 by pauldelancey

Kenyan Entree

SAFARI BURGER

INGREDIENTSSafariBurg-

1 onion
3 cloves garlic
1 pound ground beef
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon cayenne
1/2 teaspoon curry powder
1/2 turmeric
4 tablespoons lemon juice

lettuce
4 hamburger buns

makes 4 hamburgers

SPECIAL UTENSIL

no-stick frying pan

PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic cloves. In large mixing bowl, mix or, to use the scientific term, “moosh” together onion, garlic, ground beef, pepper, cayenne, curry powder, turmeric, and lemon juice. Form 4 patties.

Put patties in frying pan. Fry at medium-high heat with lid on for about 15 minutes or until the insides of the patties are done to the desired level of pinkness or brownness. There should be no need to flip the patties as the lemon juice should help cook the patties evenly. Also, these patties are crumbly, so flipping them over might make them fall apart.

Toast hamburger buns while patties are cooking. Serve patties together with lettuce on hamburger buns. This burgers have a delightful spicy/lemony kick to them.

TIDBITS

1) Safaris were originally hunting expeditions in East Africa.

2) Later safaris included journeys for tourists who wanted to see wild animals, well, in the wild.

3) San Diego’s Safari Park has short tours where you hop in busses and jeeps and take pictures of their critters for an additional fee.

4) The Park’s expeditions are thus firmly rooted in the modern, non-violent meaning of the word, “safari.”

5) Indeed, the authorities and personnel of Safari Park who look askance at you, if you and your friends took shotguns on the tour and blasted away at the park’s wildlife.

6) They’d probably end the tour right then and there and not give you a refund.

7) One could even imagine an even more vigorous response by the folks of Safari Park, one involving, say, SWAT teams.

8) Safari Park used to be called Wild Animal Park. I prefer the old name. I like to think the animals there agree with me.

– Chef Paul

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Frikadellen – German Hamburger Recipe

Posted on April 15, 2013 by pauldelancey

German Entree

FRIKADELLEN
German Hamburgers

INGREDIENTSFrikade-

1 onion (1/2 more used later)
1/2 onion
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
1 pound ground pork (or pork sausage)
2 eggs
1 tablespoon German mustard or deli mustard
6 tablespoons bread crumbs
1/4 teaspoon caraway seeds
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1 tablespoon parsley
1/4 teaspoon salt
8 Kaiser rolls
8 leaves lettuce

PREPARATION

Mince 1 onion. Slice 1/2 onion into rings. Thoroughly combine minced onion, beef, pork, eggs, mustard, bread crumbs, caraway, nutmeg, pepper, parsley, and salt in mixing bowl with hands. Contemplate the infinite while doing so.

Make 8 large meatballs with hands. Flatten them slightly to make thick patties. Fry patties in pan at medium heat for about 5 minutes on each side or until sides begin to brown. While patties are cooking slice 1/2 onion. Sauté onion slices in burger drippings until golden brown. (The onion rings, not you for goodness sakes.) Toast Kaiser rolls. (Hail, Kaiser rolls.)

Assemble the burger with: roll, patty, lettuce, and sautéed onion slices.

TIDBITS

1) The German word Kaiser means emperor and derives from Julius Caesar’s last name.

2) Julius Caesar crossed the Rubicon River in 49 B.C. starting a vicious round of civil wars that brought down the Roman Republic for good. Republics were pretty much non-existent round the world after that except in Iceland until the American Revolution in 1775.

3) Future despots though loved what Julius had done, conquering Gaul, overthrowing the Republic, and all that. So much so, they took his last name as their own or even taking the title of Caesar.

5) We see this trend in modern time. KleenexTM became so popular that all facial tissues are often known as KleenexTM.

6) Caesar also gave his name to Caesar’s salad. Blood on his hands sure, but his salad is truly tasty.

7) So if you want to achieve culinary immortality, conquer Gaul or some other country and set up your dictatorship or monarchy.

8) I have to go. I need to sneeze into my KleenexTM.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Hungarian Burger Wrap Recipe

Posted on March 27, 2013 by pauldelancey

Hungarian Entree

HUNGARIAN BURGER WRAP

INGREDIENTSHungaBW-

1 1/2 medium onions
1 garlic clove
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
1/2 tablespoon paprika
1 teaspoon parsley
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/4 teaspoon thyme
1/3 cup sour cream
1/4 cup beef broth
8 large lettuce leaves

PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic. In mixing bowl, make hamburger patties with beef, onion, garlic, paprika, parsley, pepper, sea salt, and sour cream. Fry patties in pan on medium-high heat for about 10 minutes. Flip patties over about every 3 minutes. Pour half of the beef broth on the burger each time you flip the burgers. This moistens the patties. (No, no I’m still not ready to use the word . . . moisturize.)
TIDBITS

1) Why does this recipe use lettuce wraps instead of hamburger buns?

2) I didn’t have any hamburger buns. I was just at the store and didn’t want to go back again and the patties were already cooked when I discovered the buns’ absence.

3) It would have been nice if the local supermarket could have catapulted some buns to me.

4) But they don’t have that service and seem positively disinclined to start catapulting anything to customers.

5) Besides what would happen if the catapulted burgers accidentally landed on a diver at a high-school swim meet? It would throw off his dive, give him a bad score and maybe cause his high school to lose.

6) And what if the catapulted hamburger buns triggered the army’s automatic missile defense system? The army’s intercepting missile would hit the buns. The buns would explode. Bun bits would coat houses all over the neighborhood.

7) The army would also assume we were under attack by a vicious unseen enemy. Our armed forces would go to the highest level of readiness possible.

8) Other nuclear nations would see this and believe we were preparing for a nuclear first strike.

9) They’d preempt our imagined nuclear strike with one of their own.

10) We’d retaliate. It’d be the end of the world.

11) All because I wanted buns when I could have made do with lettuce leaves.

12) Lettuce is no threat at all to cause nuclear war. It provides fiber as well!

13) Yay, lettuce.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Tandoori Turkey Burger Recipe

Posted on February 6, 2013 by pauldelancey

Indian Entree

TANDOORI TURKEY BURGER

INGREDIENTSTanTuHB-

1/4 onion
1 garlic clove
1 1/2 pounds ground turkey meat
1 1/4 tablespoons lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup plain yogurt
3/4 tablespoon garam masala (available in ethnic stores)
1/2 teaspoon cayenne
1/4 teaspoon coriander
1/2 teaspoon paprika

no-stick spray

lettuce
6 sesame-seed hamburger buns

SPECIAL APPLIANCE

outdoor grill

PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic. Add all ingredients to large bowl. Mix with hands. Cover and refrigerate overnight.

Preheat outdoor grill on medium-high. Spray grill with no-stick spray. Make patties with hand. Place patties on grill and cook until patty is white inside or its juice is clear. Turn patties over at least once, but only they are firm enough to be flipped.

Toast buns. Assemble your burger. Enjoy.

TIDBITS

1) Each burger in this recipe uses lemon juice and a turkey patty.

2) Chet Lemon was a center fielder for the Chicago White Sox and Detroit Tigers from 1975 to 1990. He played for the World Champion Detroit Tigers in 1984. Mr. Lemon hit 215 home runs over his career and batted .273

3) Bob Lemon pitched for the Cleveland Indians from 1946 to 1958. He played for the World Champion Cleveland Indians in 1948. His lifetime record was 207-128.

4) However Patty Duke never played professional baseball. Her forte was acting. She’s best known for her starring roles as Patty and Cathy Lane in the early 60s’ television program, The Patty Duke Show. Part of the theme says, “… a hot dog makes her lose control.”

5) If you lose control of your grill, you’ll have a gigantic fire.

6) In which case, you and your guests can toast marshmallows.

7) A good host always keeps the welfare of the guests in mind and adapts nimbly to any mishap.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Thai Burger Wrap

Posted on October 20, 2012 by pauldelancey

Thai Entree

THAI BURGER WRAP

INGREDIENTS

1 1/2 pounds turkey meat
1 medium carrot, about 1/4 cup
3 stalks green onions, about 1/4 cup
1/4 teaspoon sesame oil
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
2 garlic cloves
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
2 tablespoons smooth peanut butter
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/2 tablespoon peanut oil
1/4 cup fresh cilantro
2 teaspoons mayonnaise

romaine or iceberg lettuce

PREPARATION

Mix top ingredients thoroughly by hand. Make patties. Fry patties on medium-high heat for about 5 minutes, flipping them once. Wrap patty with a leaf of romaine lettuce. Wash hands before greeting dinner guests, likable or not.

TIDBITS

1) Steve Martin was a romaine-lettuce salesman appearing on a Saturday Night Live takeoff of Family Feud.

2) Thailand used to be called Siam. The musical, The King and I, was set in Thailand. The non-fiction book, on which it was based, is much more serious in tone.

3) Thailand was never conquered by the Europeans.

4) At one time, Thailand’s new army officers were required to master golf.

5) Golf is a good way to learn cussing.

6) There is no 6).

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Castro Burger

Posted on September 5, 2012 by pauldelancey

Cuban Entree

CASTRO BURGER

INGREDIENTS

1 pound ground pork
1/2 pound ground beef
1 onion
2 cloves garlic
1 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon ground mustard
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 14.5 ounce cans diced tomatoes
6  Swiss cheese slices
Dill Sandwich StackersTM Pickles
yellow mustard
6 French rolls (Use Cuban bread if you can find it.)
No mayonnaise (This is a Cuban no no.)
PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic cloves. Mix pork, beef, onion, garlic, cumin, mustard, oregano, pepper, and salt by hand. Form six patties. Fry patties in pan until golden brown.

Add diced tomatoes and juice. Cook until tomatoes and juice are hot. Toast rolls. Put patty on roll, followed by a scooping of diced tomatoes, a few pickles, and a slice of Swiss Cheese. Spread mustard on the top half of the roll and put on top of the patty and fixings. Andale.

TIDBITS

1) Some decades ago, Fidel Castro decided communist Cuba could do as well as McDonald’sTM. To back up this bold assertion, they announced the construction of roadside stands selling burgers and orange drinks. The meat in the burgers was guaranteed to contain at least 60% pork. They didn’t identify the meat comprising the other 40%.

2) This dish is in homage to Fidel Castro. Thanks Fidel, without you this dish would never have been created.

3) Fidel Castro was a good baseball player in his youth and probably would made it at least to minor leagues if he hadn’t decided to throw it all away to make a revolution.

4) Lenin caused the Russian Revolution which caused millions of people to die. His successor Stalin is responsible for tens of millions more.

5) Neither Lenin nor Stalin showed any aptitude for baseball. Coincidence, perhaps?

6) One of the first professional baseball teams in Russia played next to a missile base.

7) During the 1990s, Moscow’s utility company shut down all electricity to Russia’s command center for its nuclear strike force. Until Russia paid its electric bill, it’s nuclear missiles were useless.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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