Posts Tagged With: pickles

Tales of Culinary Weirdness:Why We Need Sandwich Police

I write a lot of fiction but sometimes I have to take my hat off to life. Click on  http://www1.whdh.com/news/articles/local/south/10010615198552/police-assault-prompted-by-too-many-pickles/
to see more about the woman who went beserk over pickles in her sandwich. She’s gonna be famous.

pickles

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Castro Burger

Cuban Entree

CASTRO BURGER

INGREDIENTS

1 pound ground pork
1/2 pound ground beef
1 onion
2 cloves garlic
1 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon ground mustard
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 14.5 ounce cans diced tomatoes
6  Swiss cheese slices
Dill Sandwich StackersTM Pickles
yellow mustard
6 French rolls (Use Cuban bread if you can find it.)
No mayonnaise (This is a Cuban no no.)
PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic cloves. Mix pork, beef, onion, garlic, cumin, mustard, oregano, pepper, and salt by hand. Form six patties. Fry patties in pan until golden brown.

Add diced tomatoes and juice. Cook until tomatoes and juice are hot. Toast rolls. Put patty on roll, followed by a scooping of diced tomatoes, a few pickles, and a slice of Swiss Cheese. Spread mustard on the top half of the roll and put on top of the patty and fixings. Andale.

TIDBITS

1) Some decades ago, Fidel Castro decided communist Cuba could do as well as McDonald’sTM. To back up this bold assertion, they announced the construction of roadside stands selling burgers and orange drinks. The meat in the burgers was guaranteed to contain at least 60% pork. They didn’t identify the meat comprising the other 40%.

2) This dish is in homage to Fidel Castro. Thanks Fidel, without you this dish would never have been created.

3) Fidel Castro was a good baseball player in his youth and probably would made it at least to minor leagues if he hadn’t decided to throw it all away to make a revolution.

4) Lenin caused the Russian Revolution which caused millions of people to die. His successor Stalin is responsible for tens of millions more.

5) Neither Lenin nor Stalin showed any aptitude for baseball. Coincidence, perhaps?

6) One of the first professional baseball teams in Russia played next to a missile base.

7) During the 1990s, Moscow’s utility company shut down all electricity to Russia’s command center for its nuclear strike force. Until Russia paid its electric bill, it’s nuclear missiles were useless.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sandwich Cubano

Cuban Entree

SANDWICH CUBANO

INGREDIENTS

4 French rolls (Cuban bread if you can find it.)
1 pound sliced ham (sweet cured ham if possible)
1 pound sliced roast pork (see note*)
1/2 pound sliced Swiss cheese (baby Swiss if possible)
Dill Sandwich StackersTM Pickles
Yellow mustard
No mayonnaise (This is a Cuban no no.)
Butter

SPECIALTY ITEM

Sandwich maker or press.

PREPARATION

The order of preparation is quite important to aficianados of this dish. I present the following as the way I learned it. Spread butter over inside of bread half. Put on a light coating of mustard next. Top this with two pickle slices, 1/4 pound of roasted pork, 1/4 pound of sliced ham, and 2 ounces of Swiss cheese. Coat the inside of the other half of the French roll with butter and mustard. Assemble the sandwich.

Spray the sandwich maker with no-stick cooking spray. Put your sandwich in the sandwich maker. Cut into two or four pieces if necessary. Cook for about three minutes.

Your sandwich maker might cook faster or slower. (Stick around and stay alert for smoke smells or that billowing cloud issuing from the sandwich maker because you thought you could read another chapter of War and Peace.)

This tastes fantastic and is quite filling. It’s just the thing to eat.

* = Sad to say, many areas of the country do not sell sliced roast pork. You now have three choices: 1) Sneak into Cuba and smuggle out sliced roast pork, 2) marry a Cuban and have your spouse’s family airmail the delicacy in a sealed pouch, or 3) go to the supermarket and buy a package of sliced smoked pork chops. Remember, ask not what your cuisine can do for you, rather ask what you may do for your cuisine.

TIDBITS

1) Tidbit 1) did not survive editing.

2) Apparently the Cuban word for “sandwich” is “sandwich.” Who knew?

3) My older son made this sandwich and took it to school for a 4th grade project on Florida. He received 4 out of 4 on it. That’s my boy.

4) The United States and the Soviet Union almost had a nuclear war over missiles in Cuba. Thank goodness they didn’t. We would have lost the recipe for this tasty sandwich.

5) If you really don’t like to be told what to do and don’t want me to dictate that the order of putting the ingredients in the sandwich, then try this. Reverse the order and serve the sandwich upside down. Your guest will see the ingredients in the usual order and you will have been the rebel you’ve always wanted to be. It’s a win-win situation.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: