cartoon

How to Pass Trucks on the Freeway

Over and over, we must drive slower than the speed limit. Ninety percent of the time, it’s because drivers in the fast lane find themselves unable to pass a truck. They get alongside the truck and can go no farther. As a result, traffic in both lanes proceed at the speed of the slow truck. What to do? How can we help these overwhelmed drivers? I decide to go to Mr. Wisdom for help.

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Spotlight on Margie Cherry, Author of “Mom’s Comedy Coloring Book”

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Bad Artist #27, Miracles

BadArtist27

Diaper Haiku #1

Oh you diapers,

You need better fragrances.

The standard one stinks.

 

Diaper Haiku #2

Sam changed a di’per

His wife will forever hear

Of this selfless deed.

– Paul De Lancey, Bad Artist

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, 

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

 

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Bad Artist #26, Technology

BadArtist26

ON HOLD HAIKU #1

You put me on hold

What’d I ever do to you

To be put on hold.

 

ON HOLD HAIKU #1

I am still on hold

I feel my will to live leave.

I grow old waiting.

– Paul De Lancey, Bad Artist

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, 

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Bad Artist #25, Supermarkets

BadArtist25

SUPERMARKET-SIGN HAIKU #1

Please sir, will you move?

Stop reading those cans and move.

I need to buy soup.

 

SUPERMARKET-SIGN HAIKU #2

Don’t care if it has

Monosodium glutamate

Buy the frickin’ can.

 

– Paul De Lancey, Bad Artist

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, 

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Bad Artist #24, Resolutions

BadArtist24RESOLUTIONS HAIKU #1

I won’t eat any

Lutefisk, mushrooms, and haggis

No matter how tempted.

 

RESOLUTIONS HAIKU #2

I hereby resolve

Not to misplace my glasses

More than once daily.

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Bad Artist #23, Christmas

CHRISTMAS HAIKU #1BadArtist23

I will always know

Why this day is so special.

Thank you, Jesus.

 

CHRISTMAS HAIKU #2

Didn’t shop Walmart.

Christmas lights up for next year.

I must have been good.

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Bad Artist#22, My Wish

BadArtist22

MY WISH HAIKU #1

May 2015

Be as wonderful to you

As you are to me.

 

MY WISH HAIKU #2

You brighten my life,

Friend, with everything you do.

I am so grateful

 

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Bad Artist #21, Driving

BadArtist21

DRIVING HAIKU #1

Dodge City Block

I got to the stop sign first.

Please do not kill me.

 

DRIVING HAIKU #2

You have a big car.

I’ve a sonic obliterator.

You will yield to me.

 

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

 

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Bad Artist #20, Grammar

BadArtist20

GRAMMAR HAIKU #1

It is a truism.

Good grammar and chocolates

Will impress your date.

 

GRAMMAR HAIKU #2

Remember tonight,

Lust is fleeting but grammar

Endures forever.

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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