Monthly Archives: June 2013

Provencale Roasted Red Pepper Soup

French Entree

PROVENÇALE ROASTED RED PEPPER SOUP

INGREDIENTSRoastedRPwB-

2 red bell peppers
2 cloves garlic
1 onion
1/2 cup olive oil
2 teaspoons herbes de Provence
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/4 teaspoon mignonette pepper (or pepper)
1/2 cup white wine
2 cups chicken broth
1 cup sour cream

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 450 degrees.

Bake bell peppers in baking dish at 450 degrees. Turn every 8 minutes until skin blackens on all sides. Remove bell peppers and put in a paper lunch bag. Close lunch bag and let bell peppers sweat for an hour.. Do not, do not, for the love of God, Montressor, take them out early.

If you take the red bell peppers out of the bag early, you will find it so difficult to remove the skin from the bell peppers. If you take the bell peppers out early, you find the horrible memory of vainly trying to remove the peppers’ skin so seared into your mind that you will need to join the French Foreign Legion to forget. Keep those bell peppers in the bag for the entire hour. Don’t let them out even if they ask.

While the bell peppers are steaming in the sack, mince garlic cloves and onion. Put garlic, olive oil, onion, herbes de Provence, salt, pepper, white wine, broth, and sour cream. Cook on low-medium heat for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally.

TIDBITS

1) “Soup” is an anagram for “Opus.”

2) Opus was the name of the penguin in the comic strip “Bloom County.”

3) I don’t recall if Opus ever ate toast.

4) My father and mother in the early days of their marriage used to go to Toastmasters. Toastmasters, at least then, was a great place to master public speaking.

5) My father spoke on the Emperor Penguin. At one point he said this penguin could jump sixty feet up into air. He meant to say sixty inches. This claim immediately got the attention of his wife, who had been suffering through other people’s speeches. She looked around to see if anyone else had noticed the mistake. Nope. They were all suffering spouses or people concentrating intently of their own upcoming speeches.

6) My mother let this mistake go. My father and mother were married for nearly sixty years.

7) Which is the height in inches an Emperor Penguin can jump. I find both feats rather impressive.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Coq au Vin

French Entree

COQ AU VIN

INGREDIENTSCoqAuVin-

4 chicken breasts
1/2 pound sliced bacon
18 pearl onions
4 garlic cloves
2 carrots
1/2 teaspoon mignonette pepper (or black pepper)
2 cups chicken broth
1 1/2 cups red wine
2 bay leaves
1/2 teaspoon marjoram
1 teaspoon parsley flakes
1/2 teaspoon thyme
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 cup fresh parsley leaves

egg noodles (optional)

SPECIAL UTENSIL

Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Cut bacon widthwise into 1″ slices. Put bacon in pot. Add enough water to cover bacon with 2 extra inches of water. Bring water to boil. Simmer on low heat for 5 minutes. Drain. Rinse in cold water. Pat dry with paper towels.

While bacon is simmering, peel pearl onions. Dice garlic cloves and carrots. Cut each chicken breast into two pieces. Put bacon in Dutch oven. Cook bacon using medium heat for 10 minutes or until bacon starts to brown. Set aside bacon but leave bacon grease in Dutch oven.

Add chicken, onions, and mignonette pepper to Dutch oven. Cook on medium heat for 10 minutes until chicken pieces are browned on all sides. Turn chicken pieces and stir occasionally.

This dish goes well with noodles. If noodles are desired, cook them as instructed on package.

Add bacon, chicken broth, wine, carrot, bay leaves, marjoram, parsley flakes, and thyme. Simmer on low heat for 20 minutes or until chicken is cooked through. Stir occasionally. Remove chicken and onions. Remove and discard bay leaves. (Goodness, if this isn’t one of the removingest recipes around.)

Add butter and flour to Dutch oven. Turn heat to high and bring to boil. Cook for 10 minutes or until about 3/4 of the liquid boils off and sauce thickens. Stir frequently. Reduce heat to low. Put bacon and onions back in Dutch oven. Stir until chicken is thoroughly coated with sauce. Garnish with fresh parsley leaves and serve on top of noodles if desired.

TIDBITS

1) Not only does this taste great but you can impress guests with its fancy French name.

2) The American Constitution is an impressive, living document. The Constitution’s 55 framers were impressive drinkers. For their good deed they threw a party where they drank 54 bottles of Madeira, 60 bottles of claret, 8 bottles of whiskey, 22 bottles of port, 8 bottles of hard cider, 12 beers and seven bowls of alcohol punch large enough that “ducks could swim in them.”

3) In the 17th century people filled their thermometers with brandy instead of mercury. Honestly dear, this glass is only the leftover from filling the thermometer. “You did want the thermometer filled, didn’t you?”

3)The highest recorded champagne cork flight was 177 feet and 9 inches, while soaring four feet off the ground. I wonder if this inspired NASA.

4) Before even brandy thermometers were used, brewers would dip their thumbs into their liquid to see if temperature was right for adding yeast. Hence the phrase “rule of thumb.”

5) Dowries in ancient Babylon included a month of fermented honey beverage. “Honey month” transformed over the years to “honeymoon.”

6) Well, that’s what I’ve read. I don’t think Babylonians used English words such as “honey month.” They probably used something, well, Babylonian. Perhaps they called it, “Mashka tohw” which through the centuries became “mosquito.”

7) Tidbit 6) could be true. I know people whose blood is like honey to mosquitoes.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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One World, One Movie: “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen” (Update)

One World, One Movie has so far failed utterly to get the Yemeni, or Yemenite, government to participate in this event for world peace and cinematic unity. Reasons for this run from not contacting them to … not contacting them. But  you, dear reader, can help help the world on July 12 by watching “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.”

“I think we’re going to the moon because it’s in the nature of the human being to face challenges. It’s by the nature of his deep inner soul… we’re required to do these things just as salmon swim upstream.”

– Neil Armstrong

Join us, join the event on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/events/384691621637151/

Let the picture below inspire everyone to greatness.

SalmonFish4

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(By the way, the weather in Yemen is often warmer than is the case in this photo.)

Please click on the below link to find out more about Salmon Fishing in the Yemen  and to see its trailer:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1441952/

– Paul R. De Lancey, Founder

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Horchata From Mexico

Mexican Dessert

HORCHATA

INGREDIENTSHorchata-

2 cups uncooked long-grain rice (white is best)
2 cups water
3 1/2 cups milk
1 tablespoon cinnamon (freshly ground is best)
1 1/4 cups sugar
1 tablespoon vanilla extract

PREPARATION

Put rice and water in blender. Blend using highest setting for 2 minutes. Put blender container in refrigerator overnight.

Add cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla extract to rice/water in blender. Blend at highest setting for 5 minutes. Pour mixture into large pitcher. Add milk. Stir with long wooden spoon. This goes well served over ice. Olé

TIDBITS

1) The director for the middle school near my home loves the song, “Tequila.” However, he and the school disapprove of alcohol, so the band changed the word in the song to “horchata.”

2) “Horchata” is an anagram for “CAA, Thor.” The initials for the Canadian Automobile Association is CAA. Thor was a powerful Norse god. I think this means Thor drives a car and is a naturalized Canadian.

3) What types of car would Thor drive? A Thunderbird.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

One World, One Movie: “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen”

In its annual effort to promote world peace and culinary awareness One World, One Movie is picking the movie, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. One World, One Movie encourages world leaders and embassies everywhere to join in this mighty quest and cinematic event.

“I’ll love you, dear, I’ll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street.”

– W. H. Auden.

Let the picture below inspire everyone to greatness.

salmonFish3

Please click on the below link to find out more about Salmon Fishing in the Yemen  and to see its trailer:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1441952/

– Paul R. De Lancey, Founder

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Maschi (Stuffed tomato) from Sudan

Sudanese Entree

MASCHI
(Stuffed Tomato)

INGREDIENTSMaschi-

1/2 cup rice
1 cup water
2 cloves garlic (2 more cloves later)
1 medium onion
1 1/2 pounds beef (round, steak, or ground beef)
1/4 teaspoon allspice
1 tablespoon dill
1/2 teaspoon salt (1/4 more teaspoon later)
2 tablespoons vegetable oil (2 more tablespoons later)
2 tablespoons lemon juice
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
8 large tomatoes

2 tablespoons lemon juice
1 cup water
2 6-ounce cans tomato paste
1/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
2 cloves garlic

Makes 8 stuffed tomatoes. Takes 1 hour 10 minutes.

PREPARATION

Cook rice and water according to instructions on package or rice cooker. While rice cooks, mince 2 garlic cloves and onion. Shred beef, if not using ground beef.

Add cooked rice, minced garlic from two cloves , onion, beef, allspice, dill, salt, 2 tablespoons vegetable oil, and 2 tablespoons lemon juice to pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until beef browns and onion becomes soft.

Cut off the middle top part of a tomato. Scoop out the insides of the tomato with a spoon or your finger. (If you’re wondering if you should marry, ask your sweetheart to use the finger methods to help you hollow out these tomatoes. If this exercise goes well, by all means, propose.) Fill tomato with sautéed beef mixture. Close the tomato with a middle-tomato top. Repeat for the other tomatoes.

Put tomatoes in large skillet. Add 2 tablespoons vegetable oil. Roll the tomatoes gently in the oil.  Add butter. Sauté at medium-high heat until tomatoes turn dark red on the outside. Remove pan from burner.

Mince 2 garlic cloves. Combine 2 tablespoons lemon juice, water, tomato paste, salt, cinnamon,  and minced garlic from two cloves in mixing bowl. Pour this sauce over tomatoes. Put skillet back on burner. Reduce heat to low. Simmer for 10 minutes or until sauce is done.

TIDBITS

1) Colonel John Garang led South Sudan’s long struggle for independence. Sudanese forces looked for Garang’s headquarters every day, hoping to decapitate the independence movement. Garang maintained radio silence unless he need to transmit critical information to his platoons.

2) Except when he radioed his congratulations to the Minnesota Twins for winning the World Series. Colonel Garang was a lifelong Twins fan.

3) Bombo Rivera was a mediocre but popular outfielder for the Twins. His popularity derived mainly from his cool sounding name. A song was even written about him. Here is a link to the lyrics, http://coffeyvillewhirlwind.wordpress.com/2007/07/05/the-ballad-of-bombo-rivera/

4) The movie, La Bamba, was made in 1987. It was not about the life of Bombo Rivera and didn’t star Bombo Rivera. Indeed, as far as I can tell Bombo Rivera did not even have a bit role in the movie.

5) The movie, La Bamba, is in English. There is no Spanish version of it, not even one in Esperanto.

6) The only movie made in Esperanto is Incubus. It starred William Shatner.

7) Within a year of that, he landed the role of Captain James T. Kirk in the television series, Star Trek.

8) So knowing Esperanto is useful.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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The Darwin Murders: Put on a Happy Face

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This literary event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

And now, a few pictures to inspire you.

darwinA

DarwinSquirrel

cannon

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The Darwin Awards: To Serve Man

DarwinKnifeAuthors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

And now, a few pictures to inspire you.

DarwinWineDarwinTard

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Lachuch Bread From Yemen

Yemeni Appetizer

LACHUCH BREAD

INGREDIENTSlachuch-

1 1/2 slices white bread
1 1/2 teaspoons dry yeast
3 cups warm water
3 cups flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 tablespoon sugar
3 tablespoons vegetable oil (or 1 teaspoon per bread)

SPECIAL UTENSIL

electric skillet

Makes about 9 lachuch breads

PREPARATION

Soak bread in small bowl of warm water. Pour water out of bowl. Press your fish against bread to squeeze out water. Again, pour water out of bowl. Squeeze soggy bread with hands to form bread paste. (This is a bad time to caress your sweetheart’s hair.)

Add yeast and warm water to large mixing bowl. Stir until yeast dissolves. Add flour, salt and sugar. Mix with fork until batter forms. Add bread paste to mixing bowl. Form batter by mixing all ingredients with whisk or fork.

Cover mixing bowl. Let batter rise for 2 hours or until it doubles in size.

Put 1 teaspoon of oil in skillet. Heat skillet to 350 degrees. Pour in 1 ladle of batter. Fry for 4-to-5 minutes until batter is golden brown on the bottom and the top is covered with bubble holes. Do not turn over. It is a no no. Repeat until batter is used up. Use 1 teaspoon of oil per ladle.

Lachuch bread goes well with Yemeni chicken soup.

TIDBITS

1) “Bread” is an anagram for “bread.”

2) Okay, that was an easy anagram. Here’s another: red ab. You get red abs by sitting at the beach too long without sunscreen.

3) It’s also an anagram for “ad reb,” as in, “Hey man, what type of ‘reb’ are you?” “Oh, I’m ‘ad reb,’ man.”

4) More traditionally, “bread” is an anagram for “beard.”

5) At one point the CIA debated making Fidel Castro’s beard fall out. Some thought the Cuban people would be so disillusioned with him if walked around with a hairless face that they would rise up and overthrow the dictator.

6) I don’t sport a beard. I have no chance of being dictator of Cuba.

5 Ancient Egyptian men and women wore fake metallic beards to mark special occasions, such as solar eclipses. I have no idea why. Maybe they had it all wrong. Maybe wearing fake metallic beards cause solar eclipses.

6) I’m not wearing a fake metallic beard as I type this. There is no solar eclipse going on.

7) See?

8) And what does “Fake metallic beards” mean? Do people grow “real metallic beards?”

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Darwin Awards: Be Proactive

Happy2bAuthors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.


https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

And now, a few pictures to inspire you.

monstersdarwinC

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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