Horrors. My magnificent scruff is slowing disappearing. The natives have spoken against. Millions of adoring fan are in shock. My modeling agency loved the scruffy look. They pleaded with me. They threatened to fire me. But I am a supermodel. I am invulnerable to such threats. Who else is as handsome? Who else can walk down the runway with such style?
However, I feel your pain; I am descruffifying with admirable slowness. Today, I removed only the bottom half of the hair remaining under my lip from yesterday. And so it go one for future days. I will hang on the my scruff with the tenacity of a man fighting a bear for his life.
Do not worry, my friends, facial hair or no facial hair, I will still be a supermodel.
Full scruff Descruffification – Day One Descruffification – Day Two
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.