Posts Tagged With: cheese

Chocolate Cream Pie

Posted on December 11, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Dessert

CHOCOLATE CREAM PIE

INGREDIENTSChocolateCreamPie-

2/3 cup semisweet chocolate bits
8 ounces cream cheese
1/3 cup milk
1/2 cup sugar
1 9″ graham-cracker pie crust

whipped cream

SPECIAL UTENSIL

blender

PREPARATION

Use medium heat to melt chocolate bits in pot. Stir constantly. Add chocolate, cream cheese, milk, and sugar to blender Using “mix” setting on blender until thoroughly blended. Pour mixture into pie crust. Add whipped cream as desired.

TIDBITS

1) “How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese?” – Charles De Gaulle (French president) From the mid 1600s to the mid 1900s, France suffered from repeated uprisings, rebellions, and riots. The country also had a global empire for well over 200 years.

2) Ancient Romans so loved cheese that they had special kitchens, caerale, just for making cheese. Recurring civil wars convulsed the Empire for over 500 years. Rome also conquered all the lands around the Mediterranean and bit more.

3) The Western Roman Empire collapsed in 476 under the crushing weight of one barbarian invasions, barbarians who wanted Rome’s cheese. The Eastern Roman Empire fell almost a millennium later in 1453. Barbarian cheese lovers just couldn’t work up enough enthusiasm for the Eastern Empire’s limited cheese selection to make a really dedicated invasion.

4) Remembering the unbridled horrors of World War One and World War Two, world leaders got together in Paris, France, June 15, 1947, to form the World Cheese Organization (WCO.) The WCO has worked tirelessly ever since to ensure adequate cheese production and selection in all the nations. They know a country with good and plentiful cheese has no reason to invade its neighbors.

5) Robert Louis Stevenson (crackerjack writer) sums up humanity’s love for cheese when he said,”Many’s the long night I’ve dreamed of cheese – toasted, mostly.” Note, just in case, the WCO is also distributing cheese toasters to the all the people of this globe.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Macarena Macaroni

Posted on November 1, 2013 by pauldelancey

Mexican Entree

MACARENA MACARONI

INGREDIENTSMacarMa-

12 ounces uncooked three-colored macaroni
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium white onion
1 red bell pepper
2 stalks green onion
1 teaspoon cumin
1/4 teaspoon tarragon
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1/4 teaspoon Vegetable MagicTM spice
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt
1/2 teaspoon onion salt
1/2 teaspoon salt
16 ounce ground beef
8 ounces grated Four Mexican Cheeses
3 ounces Cotija cheese

PREPARATION

Follow instructions shown on bag to cook multicolored macaroni. (Wouldn’t it be neat if your clothes washer had a setting for boil? Then you could use it to make quite a lot of macaroni.) Look for macaroni with the Mexican colors of: red, white or plain, and green. Drain water when done. Keep macaroni in pot. (Because once it gets out, the macaroni will never return. Wanderlust and all that.)

While macaroni is cooking, dice white onion, bell pepper, and green onion. Crumble Cotija cheese. Add olive oil, white onion, green onion, bell pepper, cumin, tarragon, chili powder, vegetable spice, garlic salt, onion salt, and salt to pan. Sauté for about 5 minutes, stirring constantly.

Mix in ground beef. Cook on medium heat until meat changes color. Stir occasionally.

Blend beef mixture in pot with macaroni. Crumble Cotija cheese. Sprinkle with Cotija cheese and Four Mexican Cheeses.

TIDBITS

1) Beef is a major ingredient of this dish. Beef comes from cattle. There is no singular form for cattle.

2) Pig is the singular form of pigs.

3) American foreign policy suffered a reverse at the Bay of Pigs in Cuba.

4) Cubans like pork. Why didn’t we send them pork instead?

5) But beef was preferred in the Old West.

6) That is why they had cattle drives back then.

7) As depicted in the television show Rawhide.

8) In Rawhide, Clint Eastwood referred to their cattle as beeves.

9) The singular form of beeves is beef.

10) Apparently, the English language was much stronger back then.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Beef Chili Cheese Fries

Posted on October 2, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Entree

BEEF CHILI CHEESE FRIES

INGREDIENTSBeefChiliCF-

1 yellow onion
5 cloves garlic
6 Roma tomatoes
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
1/2 teaspoon cayenne
1 tablespoon chili powder
2 teaspoons cumin
2 teaspoons oregano
2 cups beef broth
1 pound pre-cooked french fries (This is a great way to get rid of those french fries that come with all those hamburger meals.)
1 pound Four Mexican Cheeses (Yes, a pound)
1 1/2 cups sour cream
1 teaspoon parsley

PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic. Dice tomatoes. Add onion, garlic, and oil to skillet. Sauté for 5 minutes at medium-high heat or until onions soften. Stir frequently. Add beef, cayenne, chili powder, cumin, and oregano. Cook on medium heat for 10 minutes or until beef is no longer pink. Stir occasionally.

Add Roma tomato, dice tomato, beef broth, French fries, cheese, and sour cream to skillet. Cook on medium-high heat to 10 minutes. Stir frequently. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. Garnish with parsley and serve.

TIDBITS

1) The first known French fries were made in Belgium around 1680. Yay, Belgium. These first fries were a substitute for fried fish. Who knew?

2) Thomas Jefferson served French fries in the White House during his Presidency of 1801-1809. Oh, he also penned the Declaration of Independence and was responsible for the Louisiana Purchase in 1803. The many Louisianans who eat French fries of the Fourth of July are grateful.

3) The Rolling Stones sang about French fries in their 1964 song “Under the Boardwalk.” The Rolling Stones are British. Britain went to war with Germany in 1914 to preserve Belgian neutrality and Belgian French fries. Harsh words were said by all and the conflict went global. We are still living with the culinary consequences of the War To End All Wars.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Pierogies

Posted on September 21, 2013 by pauldelancey

Polish Entree

PIEROGIES

INGREDIENTSPierogies-

2 potatoes
1/2 cup cheddar cheese (or already grated)
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 onion

2 tablespoons butter
4 1/2 cups flour
2 eggs
1 cup sour cream
1 teaspoon salt (1/4 teaspoon more later)
4 teaspoon olive oil

1/4 teaspoon salt

6 tablespoons butter
1/2 teaspoon parsley
1/4 cup sour cream

To prepare filling: Peel potatoes. Cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Mince onion. Boil potatoes on high heat for 20 minutes. Drain water. Use potato masher or fork to mash potatoes. Grate cheese. Add potato, cheese, onion, salt, and pepper to large bowl. Use fork to mix ingredients together.

To prepare dough: Let butter soften. Add butter, flour, eggs, sour cream, salt, and olive oil to large mixing bowl. Knead ingredients into a soft dough. Divide dough into 3 lumps and cover with wax paper for 10 minutes.

Sprinkle flour on flat surface and on rolling pin. Roll the dough in a circle 1/4″ thick. Use 3″ wide glass to make 3″ circles.

To assemble: Place 1 tablespoon of filling in the center of each dough circle. Fold dough over to make a half moon. Seal edges with the tines of a fork.

Add enough water to large pot to cover pierogies. Add 1/4 teaspoon salt. Boil water. Add pierogies. Boil for 8 minutes or until pierogies float.

Skip this step if you don’t give your pierogies a golden-brown crust. Add softened butter to pan. Add 6 pierogies at a time to pan. Sauté pierogi on each side on medium-high heat for about 2 minutes or until golden brown. (Just saying golden brown puts you halfway down the path to being a chef.) Remove pierogies from pan.

Garnish pierogies with sour cream and parsley.

TIDBITS

1) Other types of pierogies have garlic in them.

2) In 1986, French and Soviet spacemen quarreled over garlic. The French would not go into space without garlic. The Soviets complained about garlic’s bad smell and refused to allow it onto the space station. Did the world come close to war? I don’t know.

3) Garlic has been thought by many over the centuries to ward off vampires.

4) Perhaps the French though the Soviets were sending their vampires into space.

5) For decades, the Soviets sent their political undesirables into the gulags of Siberia.

6) Vampires are about as undesirable as people get and since space stations are farther from Moscow than Siberia, I understand the Soviets wanting to send their vampires into outer space.

7) And I totally understand the French government not wanting its astronauts to come back as vampires to infect the entire country because they were bitten by cosmonaut vampires.

8) I always have garlic in my home to ward off Russian vampire spacemen. Better safe than sorry, I always say.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Caprese

Posted on September 18, 2013 by pauldelancey

Italian Entree

CAPRESE

INGREDIENTSCaprese-

1 pound mozzarella cheese
4 vine-ripened tomatoes
1/4 teaspoon peppercorns (or black pepper)
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1/3 cup fresh basil
1/4 teaspoon sea salt

PREPARATION

There aren’t many ingredients in this dish, so fresh ingredients are especially important. Slice mozzarella into 1/4″ slabs. Slice tomatoes 1/4″ thick. Grind peppercorns. Put alternating layers of mozzarella and tomato slices on serving plate until they are all used. Drizzle olive oil over everything and evenly sprinkle your creation with basil, pepper, and salt.

TIDBITS

1) The ancient Greeks and Romans believed basil was the devil’s herb. Put basil leaves in an urn and presto chango, basil becomes scorpions.

2) Basil helps to ease gas pains and nausea. The ancient Romans and Greeks had trouble farting as they refused to add basil to their cuisine. This bloating made them crabby, made them want to make war, made them want to destroy their tooting neighbors. Indeed, most of the wars of conquest through the centuries have been waged by basil-hating cultures.

3) Basil’s strong flavor rebuffs garden pests. It even repels insects wanting to attack neighboring plants. What a nice herb! Don’t you wish you had neighbors like basil?

4) Haitians believe basil protects their country. Indeed, basil was the first country in the French colonial empire to gain independence. However as Haiti has suffered extensive domestic turmoil since then, there seems to be a limit to its magical properties.

5) William Gaines, the founder of Mad Magazine, once flew to Haiti to get the nation’s one subscriber to order issues for another year.

6) Basil works wonders in Italy as well, where it is a token of love in Italy. Italians love basil. They have a reputation for being great lovers. Coincidence? Who can say?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Meatball Pizza

Posted on August 7, 2013 by pauldelancey

Italian Entree

MEATBALL PIZZA

INGREDIENTSMeatballPizza-

1/2 onion
1 red bell pepper
flour
pizza crust (bought or from below recipe)
1 14.5 ounce can diced tomatoes
1/2 cup pasta sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic
1/2 pound ground beef
2 teaspoons Italian seasoning
1 cup grated mozzarella cheese
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

pizza pan

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Slice onion and bell pepper into thin rings. Cut rings in half. Dust pizza pan with flour and spray with no-stick spray. Put pizza crust on pizza pan. Spread diced tomatoes and its juice evenly over the pizza crust. Spread pasta sauce evenly over the crust.

In small mixing bowl, smoosh garlic and ground beef together. Use hands to form meatballs 1/2″ inch cross. Sprinkle meatballs, Italian seasoning, and mozzarella evenly over pizza. Put pizza in oven and bake at 400 degrees for 10-to-15 minutes or until cheese or crust is golden brown.

TIDBITS

1) Favorite pizza toppings around the world:

America: bacon, ground beef, bell pepper, extra cheese, mushrooms (ugh. Sorry, I don’t like them), onion, pepperoni, sausage, tomatoes
Australia: shrimp, pineapple, barbecue sauce
Brazil: green peas, hard-boil eggs
China: thousand island dressing, eel sushi
Costa Rica: coconut, pineapple
France: flambée (bacon, onion, fresh cream)
Germany: egg, asparagus
India: pickled ginger, lamb, chicken tikka
Japan: ketchup, eel, squid, and Mayo Jaga (mayonnaise, potato, bacon)
Korea: sweet potato, shrimp
Netherlands: double meat, double cheese, double onion
Pakistan: curry
Russia: mockba (a combination of sardines, tuna, mackerel, salmon, and onions), red herring
Venezuela: corn, goat cheese

2) But if you really want to visit the cutting edge of pizza making you must go to Sweden where the following smorgasbord of toppings are popular: allspice, artichoke, banana, bacon, beets, bell pepper, Bearnaise sauce, cabbage, caper, carrot, chicken, chocolate, crab, curry, duck, eggplant, filet mignon, French fries, fruit cocktail, gorgonzola, guacamole, ham, hard-boiled eggs, honey. kebab meat. leeks, mashed potato, mayonnaise, onion, peanut, pepperoni, pickles, pineapple, raisin, salami, sausage, shallot, shrimp, white sauce, taco spices, tuna, and zucchini.

3) I really can’t explain Sweden’s unbridled culinary wildness. Swedish cuisine was much blander when I visited the country some years ago. Was there a mass poisoning of chefs by rotten lutefisk at a culinary convention? It’s quite possible; how can you detect bad lutefisk?

4) There are more pizza toppings in Sweden than are dreamed of in your philosophy.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Sausage Cheese Grits

Posted on July 23, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Breakfast

SAUSAGE CHEESE GRITS

INGREDIENTSSausCheesGrit-

1 cup uncooked grits
4 cups water
1 pound pork sausage
1 7-ounce can green chiles
6 tablespoons butter
3 eggs
1 cup grated cheddar cheese
1/2 teaspoon ScotchbBonnet sauce or TabascoTM sauce
1 tablespoon parsley

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Add grits and water to pot. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until mixture thickens. Cook sausage and green chiles in pan on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until sausage browns.

Combine butter, eggs, cheese, and Scotch bonnet sauce, grits, and sausage/chile mix to casserole dish. Sprinkle parsley on top. Put casserole dish in oven. Bake for 60 minutes at 350 degrees.

TIDBITS

1) I don’t know how many grits are in a tablespoon. There are, however, about 20,000 grains of sugar per tablespoon.

2) All you have to do to get grits/tablespoon ratio is to multiply 20,000 (the number of sugar grains in a tablespoon) by the (volume of the average sugar grain/volume of the average grit).

3) Simple, once you’ve measured a grit and a sugar grain with a teeny, tiny ruler.

4) You cannot buy a single grit. It tends to be sold in bulk. The stand unit of measurement for grits is a bowl.

5) You can purchase a single Grit magazine if you really, really want to buy a single Grit.

6) It is easier to eat a single Scotch bonnet pepper than the bonnets women of the Old West wore on their heads, it is much spicier as well. So it’s kinda of a trade off.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Bajan Meatloaf From Barbados

Posted on June 5, 2013 by pauldelancey

Barbadian Entree

BAJAN MEATLOAF

INGREDIENTSBajanMeatLoaf-

4 Roma tomatoes
1 orange bell pepper
2/3 cups spinach
1/2 white onion
2 tablespoons butter
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
3 large eggs
1 cup grated cheddar cheese
1 1/2 cup bread crumbs
1 tablespoon banana ketchup
1 tablespoon yellow mustard
4 tablespoons Bajan seasoning
1/4 teaspoon cayenne
1/2 teaspoon celery salt
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1 tablespoon parsley

SPECIAL UTENSIL

8″ casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mince tomatoes, bell pepper, spinach, and onion. Add onion to butter and sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onions are soft.

Combine spinach, onion, tomato, bell pepper, ground beef, eggs, cheese, bread crumbs, banana ketchup, mustard, Bajan seasoning, cayenne, celery salt, cumin, and parsley. You really need to use your hands to do a good job here.

(Better yet, get your ten-year old to mix this up. Oh heck, he’s at a friend’s house.)

Transfer the meat mix to this dish. Smooth the meat and bake for 50 minutes. Let cool for 5 – 10 minutes. Oh, don’t forget to wash your hands.

TIDBITS

1) It is so difficult to find fun facts about meatloaf. The rock-music star Meatloaf so enamors all the fun-fact website producers that there are no fun-fact sides for the meatloaf showcased in this recipe.

2) But I own one of Meatloaf’s albums. In homage to him let me give him a tidbit. He once worked as a valet at a concert hall or arena. One of the cast members for the musical, Hair, quit. Meatloaf was pressed into action and the rest is non-culinary history.

3) Now back to Barbados. That sounds like a Caribbean John Wayne movie doesn’t it?

4) Mongooses were brought to Barbados from India to kill the rats in the sugar cane fields. Unfortunately, the nocturnal mongooses never came into contact with the rats who scurried about during the day. The mongooses did however, decimate the island’s herds of snakes that actually ate rats.

5) I know snakes don’t travel in herds, but I do love the image. “Head ‘em up, move ‘em out.”

6) In 1976 Captain and Tennille had a huge hit with the song “Muskrat Love.” It could just as easily been called “Mongoose Love.”

7) They didn’t, of course, due in part to the bad rep the mongooses got from their activities in Barbados.

8) This is a cautionary tales for all mammals.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bajan Macaroni Pie From Barbados

Posted on June 4, 2013 by pauldelancey

Barbadian Entree

BAJAN MACARONI PIE

INGREDIENTSBajanMacaroni-

1 pound macaroni
2 onions
2 tablespoons butter
1 tablespoon banana ketchup
1 tablespoon mayonnaise
1 cup milk
1 tablespoon yellow mustard
3/4 cup grated cheddar cheese (1/4 cup more later)
2 tablespoons Bajan seasoning
2 teaspoons paprika
1/2 tablespoon parsley
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1 egg
1/4 cup grated cheddar cheese

SPECIAL UTENSIL

colander
8″ casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Boil water in large pot on high heat. Put macaroni in pot. Boil macaroni for about 12 minutes or until tender Drain macaroni in colander.

While macaroni is boiling, dice onions. Put butter and onions in now empty pot. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onions are tender. Add banana ketchup, mayonnaise, milk, yellow mustard, 3/4 cup cheddar cheese, Bajan seasoning, paprika, parsley, pepper, and egg. Mix with hands. (Pretend you are throttling the people who make hated software upgrades.)

Put mixture in casserole dish. Sprinkle 1/4 cup grated cheddar cheese on top. Bake for 30 minutes or until top starts to turn brown.

TIDBITS

1) You should serve Burgundy alongside the macaroni you serve to your guests. Serving any other wine would be gauche.

2) When the ancient Egyptians entombed their dead they sometimes gave their departed ones cheese for their journey in the afterworld.

3) The first written recipe for mac and cheese comes from thirteenth-century Italy. It used fermented cheese. Hurray!

4) The box recipe for macaroni and cheese appeared in 1802. One year later, Napoleon crowned himself Emperor of France. He would plunge Europe into war after war for most of the next twelve years. Coincidence? Perhaps.

5) The phrase “Big Cheese” originally referred to people wealthy enough to purchase a whole wheel of cheese.

6) Kraft debuted its boxed mac and cheese in 1937. The Great Depression ends two years later.

7) In 1993, Crayola came out with the color, “macaroni and cheese.” We’ve had no global wars since then.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, humor, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Chilean Pastel De Papas (Potato meat pie)

Posted on May 26, 2013 by pauldelancey

Chilean Entree

PASTEL DE PAPAS
(Potato Meat Pie)

INGREDIENTSPastelDePapas-

3 medium brown potatoes
2 small red potatoes
1 chicken breast
3 garlic cloves
1 large onion
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 tomato
3 tablespoons tomato sauce
1 pound ground beef
1/4 teaspoon cayenne
1 teaspoon cumin
1/2 tablespoon paprika
1 teaspoon parsley
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons shredded cheese (panquehue if you can find it. ☺)
2 eggs
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

9″ casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Dream of a vacation in a Greek villa overlooking the crystal blue Aegean Sea while you peel potatoes. Put all potatoes in pot. Boil on high heat for 20 minutes.

While potatoes are cooking, cut chicken into 1/2″ cubes and mince garlic, onion, and tomato. Put garlic, onion, and olive oil in frying pan or skillet. Sauté for 5 minutes or until onions are tender. Stir frequently. Add tomato, tomato sauce, chicken, beef, cayenne, cumin, paprika, parsley, pepper, and salt. Cook for 5 minutes on medium heat stirring occasionally.

Remove potatoes from pot after they have been boiled for 20 minutes. Put potatoes in large mixing bowl. Mash them, mash ‘em good. Add eggs, shredded cheese and Parmesan cheese. Mix with whisk or fork until well blended.

Spray casserole dish with no-stick spray. Put meat mixture in casserole dish. Put mashed potatoes on top of meat mixture. Put casserole dish in oven. Bake at 350 degrees for 30-to-35 minutes or until top starts to turn brown.

Put your feet up. Call in someone to do the dishes and have a nice, cooling drink until your wonderful culinary creation is ready. Esta bien.

TIDBITS

1) This recipe uses two kinds of cheese.

2) Supposedly in the late 1800s a tidal wave stranded the USS Arakwe on Chilean soil. Looters approached the heavily damaged gunboat. The sailors couldn’t reach their cannonballs, so they loaded the ship’s big guns with large cheese balls and drove off the ruffians. Unfortunately, this story seems to be a myth.

3) A similar story has Uruguay winning a naval battle with Brazil in the 1840s through the use of stale balls of cheese. The television show, Mythbusters, analyzed cheese cannonballs and concluded cheese-cannon balls could punch holes out of an 1840 sail.

4) In World War Two, a Japanese submarine surfaced adjacent to the USS O’Bannon. The American sailors riddled the submarine with their destroyer’s smaller guns. However, they couldn’t lower their ship’s heavy guns enough to sink the sub. The Japanese realized this and came out the top hatch to fire their rifles on the Americans.

Apparently, the American sailors didn’t carry enough small arms to silence the Japanese rifle and pistol fire, so they threw potatoes at their adversaries. The Japanese thinking the potatoes were actually grenades fled back into their submarine. The American destroyer rapidly sailed away to a distance where they could bring their ship’s heavy guns to bear upon the Japanese and sink their sub.

Some versions deny completely the involvement of food in this story. Oh heck.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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