Posts Tagged With: Venezuela

Arepas, Venezuelan Griddle Cakes

Venezuelan Entree

AREPAS
(griddle cakes)

INGREDIENTSArepas-

2 cups masa harina (or masarepa or white cornmeal)
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 cups warm water
1 1/2 tablespoons vegetable oil (or more as needed)
no-stick cooking spray
1 cup queso blanco (or mozzarella)
no-stick spray

Maybe a bit more masa harina or water depending on the dough.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

baking sheet

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Combine masa harina and salt in large mixing bowl. Add warm water. Mix with spoon. If dough is dry, add a bit more water. If dough is wet, add a bit more masa harina. Dough should be easy to handle and not stick to your hands. Let dough sit for 10-to-15 minutes.

Divide dough into 16 equally big balls. Flatten balls with your fingers, making dough circles about 1/2″ thick. and 2″ across. Add vegetable oil to skillet. Add about 4 dough circles, arepas, to skillet. Cook arepas on medium heat for 3-to-5 minutes on each side until they just begin to brown and blister. Repeat for all arepas.

Remove and open arepas. Slice open arepas and fill them with 1 tablespoon queso blanco. Close arepas. Spray baking sheet with no-stick cooking spray. Put sheet with arepas in oven. Bake arepas at 350 degrees for 10-to-15 minutes or until they puff up or turn golden brown. Remove from oven.

Diced green chiles also taste great inside an arepa. Be adventuresome with the fillings.

TIDBITS

1) In September, 2013, I ran for the position of El Presidente of Venezuela. My running mate was the talented author, Candace C. Bowen.

3) Oh, Bacon & Chocolate Party lost badly in Venezuela. We suspect massive bribes to the electoral commission by the winning candidate. An alternative explanation is that our tactic of campaigning to non-Venezuelans was flawed. Moreover, our campaign chest of $0.00 often proved a hindrance to effective electioneering.

4) We are sadder, but wiser politicians. This experience will help us when we run for president and vice president of the United States of America in 2016.

5) Bacon & Chocolate Party, https://www.facebook.com/BaconChocolateParty, strives to promote prosperity and world peace by ensuring plentiful and affordable supplies of bacon and chocolate. We are against GMO foods and are friends of the bees.

6) Okay, we are not great friends of killer bees. In fact, we generally run away from them.

7) Whatever happened to the big killer-bee scare of a few decades ago? Did they get lost? Did they have trouble entering a destination into their bee-sized GPS units and turned around and headed by mistake to frigid Tierra del Fuego at the tip of South America?

8) This seems a mite far fetched. They probably mated with contented bees to produce a new strain of irritable bees. Cranky bees sure, but not angry to kill anyone.

9) I get cranky when I don’t get enough sleep. Do you think bees sting people because they are cranky from a lack of sleep as well? Maybe their sleep is so light that they skip their dream cycles. Maybe we should put machines that play soothing music near their hives.

10) I see a Nobel Prize for Agriculture in my future.

11) What do bees dream about? They’re not telling us.

12) Dream, Dream, Dream was a great song by the Everly Brothers.

13) The Aaron Brothers played Major League Baseball. Hank Aaron hit 755 home runs. His brother Tommie hit 13. The Everly Brothers hit zero Major-League home runs and none in the minors leagues for the that matter. However, the Everly Brothers had many more hit songs than the Aarons.

14) Hank Aaron did have a candy bar named after him. Advantage Aaron brothers.

15) Most brothers enjoy honey. Honey is made by bees. Bacon & Chocolate Party looks out for the welfare of bees.

16) Bacon & Chocolate, promoting brotherly love since 2013.

– Chef Paul
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Meatball Pizza

Italian Entree

MEATBALL PIZZA

INGREDIENTSMeatballPizza-

1/2 onion
1 red bell pepper
flour
pizza crust (bought or from below recipe)
1 14.5 ounce can diced tomatoes
1/2 cup pasta sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic
1/2 pound ground beef
2 teaspoons Italian seasoning
1 cup grated mozzarella cheese
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

pizza pan

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Slice onion and bell pepper into thin rings. Cut rings in half. Dust pizza pan with flour and spray with no-stick spray. Put pizza crust on pizza pan. Spread diced tomatoes and its juice evenly over the pizza crust. Spread pasta sauce evenly over the crust.

In small mixing bowl, smoosh garlic and ground beef together. Use hands to form meatballs 1/2″ inch cross. Sprinkle meatballs, Italian seasoning, and mozzarella evenly over pizza. Put pizza in oven and bake at 400 degrees for 10-to-15 minutes or until cheese or crust is golden brown.

TIDBITS

1) Favorite pizza toppings around the world:

America: bacon, ground beef, bell pepper, extra cheese, mushrooms (ugh. Sorry, I don’t like them), onion, pepperoni, sausage, tomatoes
Australia: shrimp, pineapple, barbecue sauce
Brazil: green peas, hard-boil eggs
China: thousand island dressing, eel sushi
Costa Rica: coconut, pineapple
France: flambée (bacon, onion, fresh cream)
Germany: egg, asparagus
India: pickled ginger, lamb, chicken tikka
Japan: ketchup, eel, squid, and Mayo Jaga (mayonnaise, potato, bacon)
Korea: sweet potato, shrimp
Netherlands: double meat, double cheese, double onion
Pakistan: curry
Russia: mockba (a combination of sardines, tuna, mackerel, salmon, and onions), red herring
Venezuela: corn, goat cheese

2) But if you really want to visit the cutting edge of pizza making you must go to Sweden where the following smorgasbord of toppings are popular: allspice, artichoke, banana, bacon, beets, bell pepper, Bearnaise sauce, cabbage, caper, carrot, chicken, chocolate, crab, curry, duck, eggplant, filet mignon, French fries, fruit cocktail, gorgonzola, guacamole, ham, hard-boiled eggs, honey. kebab meat. leeks, mashed potato, mayonnaise, onion, peanut, pepperoni, pickles, pineapple, raisin, salami, sausage, shallot, shrimp, white sauce, taco spices, tuna, and zucchini.

3) I really can’t explain Sweden’s unbridled culinary wildness. Swedish cuisine was much blander when I visited the country some years ago. Was there a mass poisoning of chefs by rotten lutefisk at a culinary convention? It’s quite possible; how can you detect bad lutefisk?

4) There are more pizza toppings in Sweden than are dreamed of in your philosophy.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Los Candidatos Need Your Votes

Candace C. Bowen and I really need your votes if Bacon & Chocolate is to win today in Venezuela’s election. Do not let trifles such as wrong citizenship or the nearest polling booth being thousands of miles away deter you. Vote often! Excelsior! Cowabunga!

flag

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Prestigious, Rousing Endorsements for my Presidential Candidacy of Venezuela

My run for the office of El Presidente of Venezuela nearly derailed when I momentarily forget how to spell “candidacy” for this blog’s title. But I flagremembered. Whew! Anyway, I’ve been telling you, the Venezuelan voters, how I will help you or at the very least inflict the least harm of any candidate. But why take the word of someone who has run for political office, golfed, and fished?  Look at the glowing endorsements below.

“You are much more qualified than the Chavista bus driver (Maduro), and offer better perks (Bacon & Chocolate- For the People!) than the other challanger (Capriles). DeLancey for El Presidente!”
– Jonna Pattillo

“You have the full support of The Cookie Party.”
– Wayne DePriest

“Glad to know the BCP has gone post-nationalist.”
– Blaise Marcoux

“Vote Early, vote often!”
– Jonna Pattillo

“You have my endorsement. As a token of my endorsement I am sending you a fish with an endorsal fin.”
– Steve Kramer

“I really think the people of Venezuela should vote for you instead of that morally compromised bus driver turned politico. After all – You offer bacon and chocolate instead of just popular television….”
– Jonna Pattillo

“You have my endorsement, but don’t be in any hurry to cash the check.”
– Wayne DePriest

“The Lascaux Review officially endorses Paul De Lancey of the Bacon & Chocolate Party for the office of President of Venezuela.”
– Stephen Parrish

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Candace C. Bowen – Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Great Candidate for Vice President of Venezuela

My Dear Venezuelans:
Are you tired of the status-quo? Of course you are! Tomorrow you have a chance for change. Join presidential candidate Paul De Lancey and yoursflag truly to ride the dark horse to election victory. Like our fellow candidates in every nation, we will make impossible promises that we have no intention of actually keeping. Do you love bacon, chocolate and Venezuelan hot dogs? Who doesn’t? We will fill every household with a lifetime supply. Take your family and friends to the polls tomorrow and help us declare victory. Vote twice for good measure and we’ll throw in imported relish for your hot dogs. Bring your enemies and we’ll throw in organic mustard and ketchup. The time is now to make a stand my friends. Viva la bacon and chocolate!
Candace C. Bowen
Candidate for Vice President

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Running For El Presidente of Venezuela: My Plans

To all the Venezuelans who might be holding back on voting for me Sunday simply because I live in San Diego, rest assured I will fly down right away to Caracas, the capital, to assume my presidential duties if elected. Indeed, here are my flight plans assuming I get sworn in on June 4.

venezuel

Once I get there I will vigorously press for affordable bacon, chocolate, and Venezuelan hot dogs. Then I’ll take a nap.

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Why You Should Make Me El Presidente Of Venezuela

Hi! People Of Venezuela. My main competitor, Senor Madero promises everything, maduro
including “To be the salvation of the human species on the planet.” (See poster point 7.) That is indeed a worthy goal. Yet, I entertain doubts he can achieve this. And while he is failing at that, might he not neglect things that matter dearly to the great Venezuelan people?

Such as Bacon, Chocolate, and the Venezuelan hot dog. Have I stood up for bacon? Have I stood up for chocolate? Yes, I have. See the poster for the Bacon & Chocolate Party.

Can I make a Venezuelan hot dog? Yes, I can. See proof below.

Can I speak Spanish?

Si.

“Vote Bocino y Chocolate para una Mañana sabrosa.”

 

B&Ctasty

venezhd-

 

 

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I Will Be The Next El Presidente Of Venezuela

I am officially announcing my candidacy for the presidency of Venezuela. I am particularly concerned that my main contender–the name escapes me–has been disturbingly mute about protecting the glorious Venezuelan hot dog.  I, however, have made a Venezuelan hot dog, wrote up the recipe, and blogged to the world about it . My friends, the choice is clear. vote for me and the Bacon & Chocolate Party.

As they say in Venezuela, where they speak Spanish:

“Vote tocino y chocolate para una Mañana sabrosa.”*

– Paul R. De Lancey

* = pretty sure that’s translated correctly.

 

 

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