cuisine

Turkish Stuffed Bell Pepper Recipe

Turkish Entree

TURKISH STUFFED BELL PEPPERS

INGREDIENTSTurkSBP-

1 cup brown rice
2 cups water (1/2 cup more later)

1 1/2 tomatoes
8 red or green bell peppers
2 tablespoons pine nuts (see note below for substitutions)
2 medium onions
1/2 cup water
1/2 teaspoon allspice
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon dill
2 teaspoons mint
2 teaspoons parsley
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
2 tablespoons lemon juice
3 tablespoons olive oil

Many people are more allergic to pine nuts than other types. Substitutes for pine nuts are: walnuts, almonds, pistachios, cashews, and peanuts.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder
casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Cook rice according to instructions shown on bag. Mince tomatoes. Cut off tops from bell peppers. Keep tops for later. Remove seeds. Grind nuts. Mince onions.

Put olive oil and onion in frying pan. Sauté for about 5 minutes or until onions soften. Stir frequently.

Add 1/2 cup water, tomatoes, pine nuts, onion, allspice, cinnamon, dill, mint, parsley, black pepper, salt, lemon juice, and cooked rice. Cook on low heat for about 10 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Put bell pepper bottoms, open-end up, in casserole dish. Fill bell peppers with rice/tomato/spice mix. Put bell-pepper caps on top of bell-pepper bottoms. Add 1″ water to casserole dish. Put casserole dish in oven. Bake at 375 degrees for 40 minutes or until bell peppers are soft.

Discard bell-pepper tops before serving this entree to adoring family or guests.

TIDBITS

1) I looked up “fun facts about Turkey” and found the country is a member of the Council of Europe (1949), NATO (1952), OECD (1961), OSCE (1973) and the G20 industrial nations (1999).

2) I guess some people have different ideas about fun.

3) The Turks introduced coffee to Europe during some three-hundred years of invasion. Bad for the Europeans of that time, but really good for us now when we need to wake up.

4) The mighty croissant was invented in Vienna in 1683. Viennese bakers preparing breads and pastries in the wee hours in the morning heard the Turks tunneling under the city. The bakers sounded the alarm. The alerted Viennese defenders defeated the tunnelers and the city was saved. The bakers celebrated the event with pastries shaped like the crescent on the Turkish flags, hence the name croissant.

5) Isn’t tidbit 4) much more fun than tidbit 1)?

6) The Turks haven’t invaded anyone for about three centuries bringing that mode of culinary enlightenment to an end.

7) We now discover Turkish culinary recipes at bookstores and from the internet.

8) There is no more need for war.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Shirley Temple Recipe

American Dessert

SHIRLEY TEMPLE

INGREDIENTS??????????

6 ounces Sierra MistTM or Seven UpTM or SpriteTM
1 ounce grenadine syrup
1 maraschino cherry with stem
ice

PREPARATION

Pour Sierra MistTM and grenadine syrup into glass. Add as much ice as you want. Top it all with a maraschino cherry.

TIDBITS

1) My mother loved Shirley Temple when she was a little girl. She’d go to every Shirley Temple movie if she had the money.

2) This was during the Great Depression when times were truly hard. Movie theaters, in order to get people to come by, would offer free tap dancing lessions.

3) When I was little and went out with the family for dinner, my parents would make me feel important by letting me order a Shirley Temple. I really thought no one could tell the difference between my drink and the drinks all the adults were having.

4) Now that I’m an adult I have something much stronger, a Roy Rogers.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Ful Medames – Egyptian Fava Bean Recipe

Egyptian Entree

FUL MEDAMES
(fava beans)

INGREDIENTSfulmeda-

6 eggs
2 garlic cloves
1 medium onion
1 tomato
2 tablespoons sesame oil
2 16 ounce cans fava beans
1/2 cup lemon juice
1 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon coriander
1/2 teaspoon paprika
2 tablespoons parsley
1/4 teaspoon sea salt (or regular salt)
1/4 teaspoon white pepper (or black pepper)

PREPARATION

Boil water. (Hard to do on Mount Everest.) Put eggs in boiling water and cook for 6 minutes for soft-boiled eggs and 12 minutes for hard-boiled ones. Remove eggs.

While water boils and eggs cook, mince garlic and onion. Dice tomato. Add garlic, onion, and sesame oil to pot. Sauté on medium-high heat for about 5 minutes or until onion softens or starts to brown. Stir frequently.

Drain cans of fava beans. Add fava beans, lemon juice, cumin, coriander, parsley, salt, and pepper. Cook on low-to-medium heat for 10-to-15 minutes. Stir occasionally.

While fava bean/spice mix simmers, remove eggs from shells. Slice each egg into four slices. Pour fava bean/spice mix into bowls and top with egg slices.

Makes 4-to-6 bowls.

Do not do what the song suggests and walk like an Egyptian when serving hot ful medames to guests and family.

TIDBITS

1) On May 29, 1953, Sir Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay were the first people to successfully climb Mount Everest.

2) I read Norgay’s book about the climb in 5th grade. I remember them being happy and having a strong sense of accomplishment, but recall nothing about boiling eggs on the summit.

3) Indeed, I have been unable to find anything that suggests anyone has made any attempt to hard-boil eggs at the summit of Mount Everest. Apparently, everyone is too busy getting up there to even care about making culinary history with even this most modest of dishes.

4) This failure is despite the fact that oodles of people make the climb every day.

5) So many people go up Mount Everest there is a rescue helicopter designed specially to remove injured or debilitated climbers to hospitals. The chopper is kept busy.

6) If they can design a helicopter for this worthy mountain, why the heck can’t someone take the time to boil an egg at the peak?

7) We can calculate, though, how much time it should take to boil an egg there given what we know about air pressure at that altitude. A soft-boiled egg should take 20 minutes. A hard-boiled one should take 35 minutes.

8) Water should boil at the top at 66 degrees Celsius instead of the 100 degrees it needs at sea level.

9) So when someone says he’s boiling mad atop Mount Everest, it doesn’t mean much.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Eggah – Egyptian Omelette Recipe

Egyptian Breakfast

EGGAH
(Omelette)

INGREDIENTSEggah-

2 medium onions
1 tomato
1/2 red bell pepper
10 eggs
3/4 teaspoon coriander
3/4 teaspoon cumin
2 teaspoons parsley
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
3 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons flour

PREPARATION

Mince onions. Dice bell pepper and tomato. Mix eggs, coriander, cumin, parsley, and sea salt in mixing bowl. (This is why a mixing bowl is called a mixing bowl. ☺)

Put butter and onion into skillet. Sauté at medium-high heat for about 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add flour. Mix thoroughly. Add eggs/spice mixture to skillet. Stir. Cook for about 5 minutes with lid on or until eggs turn golden brown on the bottom. Flip the omelette over and cook for about 3 minutes or until the new bottom side is golden brown as well. (Note, it’s okay to use a spatula to cut the omelette in half or into four pieces before flipping it over. If your guests complain about this, point toward your vast supply of sharp kitchen knives, kitchen scissors, and kitchen mallets.)

Serve hot to friends and family and cold to telemarketers.

TIDBITS

1) Egypt is home to the Suez Canal.

2) Dentists perform root canals.

3) In a movie, Marilyn Monroe so dislikes a man she says, “You, you dentist.”

4) Do mimes cry out during root-canal operations?

5) I much prefer root beer to undergoing a root canal.

6) Charlie Root pitched for the 1935 National League champion Chicago Cubs.

7) Shirley Temple was a child film star around that time. She has a non-alcoholic drink named after her.

8) My mother met Shirley Temple.

9) My mother later had me and now you have this recipe. ☺

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Papas Chorreadas (Colombian Potatoes With Cheese And Tomato Sauce)

Colombian Entree

PAPAS CHORREADAS
(Potatoes with cheese and tomato sauce)

INGREDIENTSpapasch-

5 red potatoes
1 small white onion
5 Roma tomatoes
2 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon cilantro
1/2 tablespoon flour
1 cup heavy cream
6 ounces mozzarella

PREPARATION

Heat water on high temperature in large pot. While water comes to boil: wash potatoes, mince onion, and dice tomatoes. Put potatoes in boiling water. Cook on medium-high heat for about 30 minutes or until potatoes are soft to the fork. Remove potatoes.

While potatoes are cooking, add olive oil, onion, chili powder, cumin, and cilantro. Sauté on medium-high heat for about 5-to-10 minutes or until onions are tender. Stir frequently. Mix in flour. Add heavy cream and mozzarella. Cook for about 5 minutes until cheese melts and sauce boils. Stir frequently. Remove from heat. (Note, the culinary arts concern themselves exclusively with solid and melted or liquid cheese. I have yet to see a cookbook or recipe that calls for gaseous cheese. Imagine being able to breathe cheese. Warning! Cheese air is really hot.)

Cut potatoes in half. Pour sauce evenly over each potato.

What do you think of this recipe?

TIDBITS

1) In English, chorreadas means “to pour.”

2) And papa is Spanish for potato.

3) While papa is Latin for pope.

4) Don’t confuse your Latin with your Spanish. Pope Francis is not Potato Francis nor does Papas Chorreadas mean Pope To Pour.

5) Saint Francis showed the world how it was good to be poor.

6) I like to think Saint Francis would have liked this dish. He’s one of my favorite saints.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Hungarian Burger Wrap Recipe

Hungarian Entree

HUNGARIAN BURGER WRAP

INGREDIENTSHungaBW-

1 1/2 medium onions
1 garlic clove
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
1/2 tablespoon paprika
1 teaspoon parsley
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/4 teaspoon thyme
1/3 cup sour cream
1/4 cup beef broth
8 large lettuce leaves

PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic. In mixing bowl, make hamburger patties with beef, onion, garlic, paprika, parsley, pepper, sea salt, and sour cream. Fry patties in pan on medium-high heat for about 10 minutes. Flip patties over about every 3 minutes. Pour half of the beef broth on the burger each time you flip the burgers. This moistens the patties. (No, no I’m still not ready to use the word . . . moisturize.)
TIDBITS

1) Why does this recipe use lettuce wraps instead of hamburger buns?

2) I didn’t have any hamburger buns. I was just at the store and didn’t want to go back again and the patties were already cooked when I discovered the buns’ absence.

3) It would have been nice if the local supermarket could have catapulted some buns to me.

4) But they don’t have that service and seem positively disinclined to start catapulting anything to customers.

5) Besides what would happen if the catapulted burgers accidentally landed on a diver at a high-school swim meet? It would throw off his dive, give him a bad score and maybe cause his high school to lose.

6) And what if the catapulted hamburger buns triggered the army’s automatic missile defense system? The army’s intercepting missile would hit the buns. The buns would explode. Bun bits would coat houses all over the neighborhood.

7) The army would also assume we were under attack by a vicious unseen enemy. Our armed forces would go to the highest level of readiness possible.

8) Other nuclear nations would see this and believe we were preparing for a nuclear first strike.

9) They’d preempt our imagined nuclear strike with one of their own.

10) We’d retaliate. It’d be the end of the world.

11) All because I wanted buns when I could have made do with lettuce leaves.

12) Lettuce is no threat at all to cause nuclear war. It provides fiber as well!

13) Yay, lettuce.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Venezuelan Hot Dogs Recipe

Venezuelan Entree

VENEZUELAN HOT DOGS

INGREDIENTSvenezhd-

1 small onion
1/8 head cabbage
1 3 ounce bag plain potato chips (or whatever amount is close or preferred)
6 potato hot-dog rolls (regular okay)
6 pork hot dogs (beef okay)
mayonnaise
mustard
ketchup

SPECIAL UTENSIL

rice cooker with steamer insert

PREPARATION

Mince onion and cabbage. Smash the potato chips into little bits. My preferred way is to hit the potato-chip bag a number of times with my fist. (Don’t be so enthusiastic that the bag ruptures and little chips fly all over the kitchen.)

Fill bottom of rice cooker with enough water to cover hot dogs. Bring water to boil. Add hot dogs. Put in steamer insert. Add as many rolls as will fit on the insert. Cover with lid. Cook for 2-to-3 minutes or until rolls are warm and soft. Remove rolls. (Be sure to check; over-steamed rolls can get soggy.) Add remaining rolls and cook another 2-to-3 minutes. Remove rolls. Remove hot dogs with tongs or fork.

Put hot dog in roll. Spoon desired amounts of onion, cabbage, and potato chips on hot dog. Squirt mayonnaise, mustard, and ketchup on top of your creation until you are happy. (Eat with the cut of the roll facing up. This is a messy hot dog.)

TIDBITS

1) The recent leader of Venezuela was Hugo Chavez.

2) The United States did not have the best relationship with him.

3) But Venezuela’s hot dogs are great. Perhaps we could show the new Venezuelan leadership how much enjoy this dish.

4) We have good hot dogs as well. Our president could bring their president chili dogs and Coney Island dogs. My their president could give us Venezuelan hot dogs to bring back to the United States.

5) Hot Dog Diplomacy. We should give it a chance. After all, look what Ping-Pong Diplomacy did for China and America.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, politics, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Pule Me Arra – Chicken With Walnuts Recipe

Albanian Entree

PULE ME ARRA
(Chicken with walnuts)

INGREDIENTSpulemea-

4 chicken breasts
5 garlic cloves
5 ounces walnuts.
1 bay leaf
2 tablespoons olive oil

2 tablespoons flour
3 tablespoons butter (2 tablespoons later)
1/4 teaspoon white pepper (or black pepper)
1/4 teaspoon sea salt (or salt)
1/4 teaspoon thyme
2 tablespoons vinegar

2 egg yolks
2 tablespoons butter

Goes well with rice

PREPARATION

Cut chicken into 1/2″ cubes. Mince garlic. Crush walnuts.

Put chicken, garlic, bay leaf, and olive oil in saucepan. Sauté on medium-high heat for about 10 minutes or until chicken is white inside . (Okay, you might need to cut open a chicken cube to see. If it’s done, you might want to taste that piece to be sure. And then a second chicken cube, and a third, because you never know. ☺) Stir occasionally.

Add flour and 3 tablespoons butter to second saucepan. Sauté the flour on medium-high heat until flour turns light brown. Stir constantly. Add chicken cubes, vinegar, walnuts, pepper, salt, and thyme. Cook for another 20 minutes on low heat. Stir occasionally. Transfer this wonderful mixture to large serving bowl.

Sauté eggs yolks in 2 tablespoons of butter using high heat, in third saucepan, until butter boils and eggs reach desired level of doneness. Pour sautéed eggs and butter on top of chicken-and-walnut mixture. Serve immediately.

TIDBITS

1) Pule me arra translates from Albanian to chicken with walnuts while gjellë me arra means dish with walnuts.

2) This is useful information if you’re ever on an Albanian quiz show.

3) According to one of my FacebookTM friends, Albania along with Moldova are the two forgotten countries of Europe. Your never hear of them.

4) I did find out, though, that Albanians are mad about walnuts.) There is an episode in the Dick van Dyke Show where aliens take over people’s bodies. You can tell they’re aliens because they have no thumbs and absolutely love walnuts.

6) The original Waldorf salad was created at the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel in 1896 by the maître d. This first version did not contain walnuts.

7) So we know the Waldorf-Astoria was not hiring walnut-loving aliens at that time. Walnuts were added to the salad later.

8) Thus we can pinpoint the Great Walnut-Loving Alien Invasion of Earth to after 1896.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Provencale Dressing Recipe

French Appetizer

PROVENÇALE DRESSING

INGREDIENTS

ProvDre-

2 cups mayonnaise
6 tablespoons red wine vinegar
2 garlic cloves
1/2 tablespoon Dijon mustard
1/2 tablespoon herbes de Provence
1/4 teaspoon French tarragon (or tarragon)
1/4 teaspoon white pepper
1/4 teaspoon sweet French basil (or basil)

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Combine all ingredients in mixing bowl. Mix thoroughly. Cover and refrigerate for 2 hours or until you can’t stand waiting any more or until ravenous guests arrive.

TIDBITS

1) This recipe tells you to cool the dressing in your fridge.

2) Putting your beer bottle in your fridge is not the fastest way to cool it down.

3) The fastest way to cool down your beer is to put it in a sink full of cold water and crushed ice while cold tap water falls on the beer bottle.

4) Okay, okay, the fastest way to cool down your bottle of beer is to combine your sink full of cold water and crushed ice with liquid nitrogen.

5) Too little liquid nitrogen and nothing happens.

6) Too much and your beer freezes. So will the water in your sink. So will your hand if you try to take the beer bottle out of the liquid nitrogen.

7) Tidbit 6 is why you must jump through all sorts of hoops to buy liquid nitrogen.

8) So may I suggest using tidbit 3 if you want to cool your beer.

9) Better living through chemistry.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Shorba Baida – Algerian Chicken Soup Recipe

Algerian Soup

SHORBA BAIDA
(Chicken Soup)

INGREDIENTSShorbaS-

2 chicken breasts
1 medium onion
2 inch cinnamon stick
2 large tomatoes
10 ounce can chick peas
2 teaspoons olive oil
4 cups chicken broth
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1/2 tablespoon basmati rice
1 tablespoon barley
2 large tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon coriander
1/2 tablespoon parsley flakes
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/2 teaspoon turmeric
SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder
Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Cut chicken breasts into 1/2″ cubes. Mince the onion. Grind the cinnamon stick until you get powder. Dice the tomatoes. Drain the chick peas.

Use medium-high heat to sauté the chicken, onion, and cinnamon with olive oil in Dutch oven. Cook for 5-to-10 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently.

Add chick peas, chicken broth, lemon juice, rice, barley, tomatoes, chili powder, parsley, pepper, sat, and tumeric. Cover the Dutch oven and simmer on warm heat for about 1 hour or until rice and barley are soft.

This is great. People love it. Eat your share while you can.

TIDBITS

1) This heavenly soup is the reason the French conquered Algeria in 1830.

2) This heavenly soup is the reason Algeria threw out France in 1962. The Algerians didn’t want to share.

3) Did the Algerians get any culinary benefits from 132 years of Gallic occupation?

4) I hope so. A Vietnamese man once said the only benefit his countrymen derived from French colonial rule was the baguette.

5) Vietnamese culinary artists combined the baguettes with their way of preparing meat to produce the tasty and world-famous banh mi sandwiches.

6) America fought in Vietnam for the banh mi sandwiches. And so it goes.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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