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Taiwanese Beef Noodle Soup

Taiwanese Soup

BEEF NOODLE SOUP

INGREDIENTSbeefnoodlesoup

5 garlic cloves
1 inch ginger root
6 scallions (white part of green onions)
1 Roma tomato
2 Thai chiles or red chiles
8 cups water (or enough to cover short ribs)
1⅓ cups Chinese rice wine or sherry
¾ cup soy sauce
3 tablespoons brown sugar
1 tablespoon Sichuan chili bean sauce
(doubanchiang), Korean gochujang. or bean sauce
4 whole star anise pods
3 pounds beef short ribs
1 cup chicken stock
1¼ pounds Asian wheat noodles or linguine
¼ cup mustard greens or spinach
¼ cup baby bok choy, bok choy, or Napa cabbage
2 tablespoons fresh cilantro

SPECIAL UTENSILS

8 quart pot
tongs

Makes 8 bowls. Takes 4 hours 30 minutes.

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Peel and grate ginger root. Cut scallions into ¼” slices. Dice tomato and Thai chiles. Add garlic, ginger, scallion, tomato, water, rice wine, soy sauce, brown sugar, chili bean sauce, and star anise into pot. Bring to boil on high heat. Reduce heat to low. Simmer for 10 minutes.

Add short ribs. Cover and simmer on low heat for 2½ hours or until meat is tender to the fork, but is still on the ribs. Turn off heat, remove lid, and let sit for 1 hour. Remove meat from pot with tongs and place on flat surface. Push bones out of short ribs. Shred beef with fork.. Return shredded beef to pot. Add chicken stock. Simmer on low heat for 20 minutes. Stir occasionally.

While soup simmers, cook noodles according to instructions on package. Dice mustard greens, baby bok choy, and cilantro. Add noodles to bowls. Add mustard greens and bok choy to bowls. Ladle soup over mustard greens and baby bok choy. Garnish with cilantro.

TIDBITS

1) Not too many years ago, Susan Chang of Poway, California, posted the following question on FacebookTM, “If we took all the cooked noodles in the world and tied them together, would they reach all the way to Mars?” No response. Susan asked the same question, but added a picture of two kittens playing with noodles.

2) The post went viral. Suddenly, billions of people had to know. Purchases of noodles went up a thousand fold. The entire economies of thirteen smallish countries switched over to making noodles. Greenland built sixty million hot houses to raise wheat. Ten million babies were named after noodles, “Noodlo if they were boys or “Noodla” if they were girls.

3) Soon the world had billions of miles of noodles, enough to cover every road in the world. This naturally made traveling anywhere difficult, unless, of course, you had a JeepTM equipped with noodle tires. But we didn’t have many of those vehicles. Most factories still churned out noodles.

4) Time to cook those noodles. On May 5, all seven billion people cooked noodles. The steam from all that water boiling formed a thick cloud over the entire Earth. The cloud lasted an year. No sunlight got through at all; dinosaurs that somehow survived the meteor from 65 million years ago, died up for good. People tied noodle after noodle together. Soon a string billions of miles long circled the globe countless times. We know it was countless because no one tried counting it.

5) Sally was chose for the honor of stretching the string to Mars. Being five foot seven and standing on her tippy toes and extending her hand to sky, she managed to lift the noodle end seven feet to Mars. This was short of the Red Planet as all could see. So, Sally stood on her boyfriend Bob’s shoulders. Still short of Mars. A troupe of Chinese acrobats came over. Although they stood seventeen people tall, a GuinnessTM record for noodle standing they were still not all the way to Mars.

6) Bushnell AviationTM lent a helicopter. One person, Dwayne, held onto the helicopter and then another person held on to him, and so on. However, even though Wayne was a weight lifter, even he couldn’t hold up 15,000 pounds of people for long. He let go. Fortunately every fill into the community swimming pool, establishing Guinness records for the largest number of people to successfully perform a cannonball into a community pool and for the largest tidal wave in Wyoming.

7) Then NASA and the European Space Agency, seeing people actually performing scientific experiments got into the act. A space shuttle spooled out the noodle string as it traveled Mars. The string measured 135 billion miles, enough to get to that planet when it was closest to Earth.

12) Unfortunately, Mars was farther away than that. The phlegmatic population, there being a global cold, shrugged and built a noodle string three time longer than the first, which is still whipping around the Earth. NASA tried again. It worked! It did. It did. All the way to Mars. Sally clipped the string in two. ESA carried the second string all the way as well. The noodle strings stayed in place as the extremely cold temperatures of space froze them into super strong poles.

13) Then Amos Keeto, at Bushnell ConstructionTM said, “We have extra noodle, enough to make rungs between the noodle poles. The people of Earth, did just that. Now, if you have space suit and have enough supplies, you can climb to Mars. Way cool.

Chef Paulcookbookhunks

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with 180 wonderful recipes is available on amazon.com. My newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, is also available on amazon.com

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Support Taco Truck Tuesday

Citizens of America,FishTaco-

Marco Gutierrez says that if Donald Trump doesn’t win, there will be taco trucks on every corner. Whoa! That’s wonderful. That’s awesome! Tacos are the best food in the world. And we can have them if Trump loses. Whoa. There you have it, America, yet another reason to vote for me, Paul De Lancey, presidential candidate of the Bacon & Chocolate Party. Do you want tacos as close to you as the nearest street corner, whenever you want? Of course, you do.

Show your support for the incredible taco. Show your support for the incredible chefs who, in the hot, cramped quarters of their trucks, turn out one delicious taco after another. This Tuesday, just three days from now, go out and patronize your nearest taco truck. Drive for hours if need be. Surf the internet, talk to stranger after stranger, but find that taco truck. Bring back tacos for neighbors. Do a good deed and buy truck tacos for shut ins. Helping others, isn’t that why were put here on Earth?

So buy those street tacos. And don’t forget to get a picture of you eating that taco in front of that taco truck. So, show your support for tacos. Show your support for taco makers. Make your neighborhood at new Eden by encouraging the mobile taco makers to come to your corner. Oh gosh, I shiver at the prospect.

Remember this Tuesday, this Taco Truck Tuesday. Buy that taco. Get a picture of yourself in front of the truck or least a picture of the truck. Post the photo here. Post it on Facebook. Post it on Twitter  #TacoTruckTuesday, and any other social media you can thing of. Do it for yourself. Do it for your neighborhood. Do it for America. Especially on Tuesday, November 8, the Taco Truck Tuesday  where you vote.

MAKE AMERICA TACOS

– Paul De Lancey, taco lover and presidential candidate

LutheranCookbook

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, are available on amazon.com

The cookbook is also available as an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Like Moths to a Flame

Take my beautiful, adoring women. Please!moth

According to the advertisements I get on line, there are literally dozens of beautiful women eager to have me invest in foreign currencies. Of course, this is all understandable as I know the purchasing-power parity condition, e.g.,

Price of Big Mac (denominated in dollars) = ($/Euro) * Price of Big Mac (denominated in euros)

However, I already have a wife who would love me even if I didn’t understand foreign exchange. So, I don’t need these beauties and their euros and yen. I’m sure my wife would feel the same as well.

So, visit me on Facebook and claim one of my admirers. It would be nice, if at the same time, you purchased one of my novels. I mean, fair is fair.

I could have had a really cool photo of a 5 lempira note from Honduras but I’m having problems with my scanner. Sorry.

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Dreamer

4novels

Check out my latest novel, the Christmas thriller, Beneficial Murders. My books are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com, As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Bacon Roses

American Breakfast

BACON ROSES

INGREDIENTSBaconRoses-

1 pound sliced bacon

SPECIAL UTENSILS

1 box wooden toothpicks
1 or 2 baking pans (must have raised sides to keep bacon grease from spilling into oven)

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Roll up bacon slice. Put 3 or 4 toothpicks into the bottom of the bacon roll so it stands upright like a spaceship. Repeat for remaining slices. Put bacon spaceships upright in baking pan. Bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes. Serve and enjoy. This dish is particularly good on the mornings of those romantic days such as Valentine’s Day or your anniversary and you’ve suddenly realized, Oh my gosh, I forgot to get flowers.

TIDBITS

1) Bacon is great for you. It will make you live longer. For proof, click http://newrisingmedia.com/all/2013/9/30/study-shows-eating-bacon-will-make-you-live-longer.

2) Bacon inspires artists. For Nick Offerman’s slam poem for bacon click https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSVO5VloDlc. Read Shakespeare’s Henry IV Part 1 and The Merry Wives Of Windsor to see how bacon inspired the Great Bard.

3) I am running for president on the Bacon & Chocolate Party ticket. My running mate is Candace C. Bowen. Click on https://www.facebook.com/BaconChocolateParty for more information.

4) Bacon conquered the Wild West. Settlers from the East carried bacon, coffee, beans, and flour with them. Wagon trains carrying too little bacon turned back or met with horrible fates.

5) Making bacon by preserving and salting pork bellies began with the Chinese around 1500BC. The earliest account of bacon and eggs for breakfast dates back to 1560. China is the world’s most populous nation. Coincidence? Perhaps.

6) George Orwell wrote about bacon in 1931. He wrote Animal Farm fourteen years later, possibly to justify the killing of pigs to make bacon.

– Chef Paul
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Atty’s Attic Interviews Me!

Atty'sAttic

Paul DeLancey goes above and beyond on this interview. You’re gonna love this guy!

While the Earl of Sandwich earns a spot in any culinary hall of fame, he was indeed a flawed man: opinionated, drunken, corrupt, incompetent, a sex fiend, a Satan worshiper, and all that.

And with that intro welcome Paul to my attic.

Who are you and where did you come from?

I’m Paul R. De Lancey. I was born in Los Angeles. I mostly grew up in Arcadia, California. I lived a year in Australia and three years in the Netherlands. I enjoy humorous novels, science fiction, history, and cookbooks. I also enjoy long walks to the fridge for orange juice.

Obviously you’re a writer, what is the name of your book and the general plot?

The title is “Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World.” It’s a cookbook, so there isn’t any plot, although I do add humorous tidbits at the end of each recipe about the recipe and its ingredients.

Where did you come up with the idea?

I’ve always liked to cook. I had been posting my meals on Facebook and on my blog. People showed interest and even suggested I write a cookbook. So I did.

Which of your characters do you like the most and why?

Again, there are no characters in a cookbook, but I like Mexican food the best.

Too funny, thank you for answering anyway!

Which one do you hate the most and why?

I hate lutefisk. So did the Vikings. The idea of staying put in Scandinavia with its horrible lutefisk made the Vikings so ornery that they invaded and rampaged over Europe for centuries.

You’re stranded on an island and you are granted three things;

The first thing you’re granted is an iPod with only one song loaded, what is it?

The theme song from Barney to motivate me in finding a way off the island.

The second item is a book with the last chapter missing, what is it and who wrote it?

War and Peace by Tolstoy. I Loved it except for the mind-numbingly boring last chapter. I want to thank who ever tore out that last chapter.

And the third thing you’re granted on this island is a lunchbox with a sandwich and a full thermos, yummy, what kind of sandwich and drink would you appreciate?

Philly cheese steak and root beer.

What is the biggest mistake you have made in your life? Not writing or publishing mistake – any mistake. Even if it happened in 3rd grade, I wanna know about it.

Stupidly changing an answer on a national math test in high school at the last second. If I had left it alone I would have gotten national recognition.

What would you do for a Klondike bar?

Not much.

You’re still stranded on that island and two people show up, the character you love the most, and the one you hate the most, and they both know what you said about them. What do you do?

Get them to look for a contact lens in the sand while I sip on the root beer I got earlier in this questionnaire.  Oh, and thank you for the root beer.

Flash round favorites:

Color

Blue

Sound

In my hearing range

Season

Spring. I so wanted to say allspice.

Animal

Cat

Smell

Food cooking

Food

Tacos

Place to visit

Fiji

Place to live

Wherever my family is

Movie

It’s a Gift by W.C. Fields

Alien

Mexican, French, Swedish

Great answer!

Number

5

Writing spot

Fiji

Texture

Smooth

Planet

Earth

And last of all, favorite memory?

Births of my children

Anything else you would like to add?

Vote Bacon & Chocolate in 2016.

And on that note, Paul didn’t have to but he shared a fantastic recipe for us so I do expect you all to try it. Thank you so much, Paul for going above and beyond!

 

American Entrée

 SLOW FRENCH DIP SANDWICHES

french

INGREDIENTS

2 1/2 pounds beef loin top sirloin
1 1/2 pounds beef sirloin tip
1 10.5 ounce can condensed French onion soup
1 cup beef stock or broth
1/2 cup water
8 peppercorns
1 bay leaf
1 teaspoon rosemary
1 teaspoon thyme
2 garlic cloves
1 teaspoon beef base or 1 beef bouillon cube
1/2 teaspoon sea salt
1 teaspoon Meat MagicTM spice
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
10 slices provolone cheese or about 10 ounces
5 French rolls

SPECIALTY ITEM

3 quart, or larger, slow cooker.

PREPARATION

Cut the top sirloin and the sirloin tip enough so that it will fit inside your slow cooker and be covered with the liquid you will add later. Dice garlic cloves.

In fact, here comes the liquid now. Pour French onion soup, beef stock, and water into slow cooker. And now for addition. Add peppercorns, bay leaf, rosemary, thyme, garlic, beef base, sea salt, meat spice, and pepper. And wait.

And wait. Oh and the turn the cooker on low for 6-to-8 hours. (Egads, you’ll have time to collect all receipts that you’ve stashed all around the house in preparation for tax time. Then you forgot where you put them. Now you have time to find them. Go! Go! Look for those receipts. I’m with you on this one.)

It really pays to get an early start on this one, especially if you are using your cooker for the first time. Many but not all slow cookers will get the job done on low in 6-to-8 hours. (My crock pot however needs to be set on high to cook anything in less time than it takes a city to repair a major street.)

Use spoon with holes in it to remove beef from cooker to serving bowl. Open French rolls. Put a slice of provolone cheese on each half. Use spoon with holes in it to put a generous portion of beef on the roll. Spoon juice remaining in cooker onto open sandwich. Close sandwich. Spoon more juice onto closed French roll. Eat. Dream of Heaven.

TIDBITS

1) The sandwich was invented in 1762 when the Earl of Sandwich was too busy to leave the gambling table to eat. Instead, he had a waiter bring him roast beef between two pieces of bread.

2) See, gambling has been good for society.

3) Indeed, many people believe professional sports came into being because gamblers hired players to be on the team they were backing with their bets.

4) The Earl asked for slices of bread to keep the grease from the roast beef from marking the playing cards.

5) While the Earl earns a spot in any culinary hall of fame, he was indeed a flawed man: opinionated, drunken, corrupt, incompetent, a sex fiend, a Satan worshiper, and all that.

6) There is no word, however, if he over spiced.

7) But he did weaken the Royal Navy to such an extent that the French Fleet beat it in 1781, ensuring America’s victory in the American Revolution.

8) A lot to think about when you bite into your next sandwich.

website: www.lordsoffun.com

blog: pauldelancey.com

Thank you so very much for coming to cook for us today. My attic smells wonderful!

Thank you, Atty!

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James McShane: A Winner of The Darwin Murders Literary Event

In The  Darwin Murders Literary Event, I am pleased to announce winner number two of two. Please join with me in congratulating James for his submission: The Television Licence Inspector.

james

James McShane

The Television Licence Inspector

It was the last time he would ever come to my door, the last time he’d make my life a misery. Don’t get me wrong, he had a job to do, but he didn’t have to make it personal; he didn’t have to push me as far as he did.

I knew he’d be around on Friday. He made it a habit to make sure I was his last call of the week, letting me know he’d be thinking about how much he was going to make the following week a misery for me. I couldn’t take it anymore – something had to give.

So that fateful Friday, after much planning, I admitted to him that yes, I did indeed have a television licence, and would he like to come and see it? He didn’t know what to say, the poor chap, and when I offered him a cup of Earl Grey tea, the bottom nearly fell out of his world. He sat at my table, taking sip after sip of bergamot flavoured tea, while I rooted through my drawer looking for a television licence that didn’t exist.

The poison took full effect within two minutes. I watched the poor bastard struggle to breathe, spluttering tea all over my nice Ikea table. I saw the hopelessness in his eyes as at last he understood why I did what I did. Why pay a television licence when there’s never really anything on to watch? It’s enough to drive a man to murder.

✍ ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍

James McShane is a writer from Dublin, Ireland. Struggling to write and complete his first novel, he spends much of his time on Facebook.

 

Paul R. De Lancey

www.lordsoffun.com

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The Darwin Murders Literary Event: Get Happy

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

We encourage you to have Fun with this event. C’mon, get happy.

And now a picture to inspire you as you plot your Darwin murder.

brunette2

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The Darwin Murders Literary Event: Let’s See That Smile

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

We encourage you to have Fun with this event. Make someone happy

And now two pictures to inspire you as you plot your Darwin murder.

darwinE2darwinF

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One World, One Movie, “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen”- Will the Government of Yemen Watch?

SalmonFish2

I believe the entire One World, One Movie society will win the Nobel Peace Prize if we can get the government of Yemen to watch our picked movie.  If  Yemen enjoys Salmon Fishing in the Yemen along with us, we will have taken the first step to world peace.

Let the words of an American president inspire you to Salmon Diplomacy

”I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.’bushfish

—Presidential candidate George W. Bush, Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000

Please click on the below link to find out more about the movie Salmon Fishing in the Yemen  and to see its trailer:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1441952/

Join us, join the event on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/events/384691621637151/

– Paul R. De Lancey, Founder

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The Darwin Murders Literary Event: Have You Done Your Good Deed?

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to theKindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This literary event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

And now, a few pictures to inspire you.

darwinDDarwinCovermonsters

 

 

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