Posts Tagged With: America

Chocolate and Vanilla Sundae

Posted on January 31, 2014 by pauldelancey

American Dessert

CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA SUNDAE

INGREDIENTS

3/4 cup whipping cream
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/3 cup unsalted peanuts (or already ground)
2 pints chocolate ice cream
2 pints vanilla ice cream
nonpareils (optional)

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder or other grinder or quick hands with a knife

PREPARATION

Make chocolate sauce by adding whipping cream, chocolate chips, and vanilla extract to pot. Cook on low heat for about 5 minutes or until chocolate is completely melted or liquid becomes uniformly dark. Stir constantly.

Grind peanuts. Add large scoop (is there any other kind?) of chocolate ice cream and a large scoop of vanilla ice cream for each bowl you make. Drizzle chocolate sauce over each bowl, top with ground peanuts and nonpareils, if desired.

TIDBITS

1) Alexander the Great (356-323 B.C.) enjoyed snow flavored with nectar and honey. He was just a few steps away from inventing ice cream. But no, Alexander invaded the Persian Empire instead. His armies conquered land after land. However, these conquests never brought him the satisfaction that only a scope of ice cream could have given. Alexander came to realize how he had wasted his life by not coming up with ice cream and he drank himself to death.

2) The Roman Emperor Nero (54-68 A.D.) enjoyed ice and snow topped with fruit. He committed suicide rather than share this dessert with a jealous Roman mob

3) Marco Polo (1254-1324) is most famous for bringing the idea of ice cream from China to Italy. The Renaissance followed shortly.

4) Ice cream became readily available in seventeenth-century France. French literature flourished.

5) Ice cream came to America in the 1700s. and caused the birth of the American Republic in 1776.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history | Tags: Alexander the Great, America, American, chocolate, chocolate chips, emperor, France, French, ice cream, literature, Marco Polo, Nero, nonpareils, Persian Empire, Renaissance, Republic, Roman, sundae, vanilla, vanilla extract, whipping cream | Leave a comment

Simple Tacos

Posted on October 28, 2013 by pauldelancey

Mexican Entree

SIMPLE TACOS

INGREDIENTS

1 pound ground beef
1 medium onion
2 teaspoons cumin
1 1/2 teaspoons Meat MagicTM spice
1 1/2 cup grated Four Mexican cheeses
6 taco shells
1 1/2 cups lettuce
1 1/2 cups salsa

PREPARATION

Mince the onion in a food processor. (My cooking life took a quantum leap when I acquired this gizmo. Get one.) Add onion, cumin and meat spice to ground meat. Mix by hand.

Cook mixture in saucepan until all of the meat is no longer pink. Shred lettuce by hand or chop into middlin’ sized pieces with a knife. Gosh, fill the taco shell with meat, lettuce, cheese, and salsa. Better yet, get a 20-inch across Lazy Susan and let your diners make their own tacos according to their tastes.

Lazy Susans are fantastic. They are round, rotating platforms, usually made of wood. Put a bowl on the Lazy Susan for each of the beef, cheese, taco shells, lettuce, and salsa. With this handy device the need to constantly pass bowls back and forth disappears. (Just try to find a Lazy Susan. Anywhere. I weep for America.)

TIDBITS

1) Tacos have always been my favorite food. I asked for tacos for all of my childhood birthday dinners.

2) My grandmother was born in Mexico. She made tortillas by hand.

3) “Tacos” is an anagram for “coast”, “coats”, “o scat”, and “o cats!”

4) Cumin goes with so many Mexican dishes.

5) Supposedly long ago, a wealthy Mexican family had a maid named Susan. She didn’t enjoy constantly moving bowls back and forth. So she invented the device that bears her name. For this, someone called the tool the “Lazy Susan.” Seems to me, it should have been named the Entrepreneurial Susan.

6) When I was growing up, my family had a superb Lazy Susan made of hardwood. It’s gone, gone. Where did it go? It’s hard to get a good Lazy Susan these days. Why? Why?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, recipes | Tags: America, birthday dinners, cumin, entree, entrepreneurial, four Mexican cheeses, ground beef, lazy Susan, Meat Magic, Mexican, Mexico, onion, salsa, simple tacos, taco shells, tacos, tortillas | Leave a comment

Deviled Eggs

Posted on October 23, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Appetizer

DEVILED EGGS

INGREDIENTS

4 eggs
1/3 teaspoon paprika
1 1/3 tablespoons mayonnaise
1/3 teaspoon mustard powder

PREPARATION

Place eggs in a pot. Put water in pot. Bring water to boil. Cook for twelve minutes. (Read short sentences.) Do not overcook; a green coating on the yolk would look especially horrible for this recipe. Put eggs in bowl of cold water for fast cooling. Remove shells, cracking the eggs from the bottom first.

Cut eggs in half, lengthwise. Remove the egg yolks. Release your pent-up frustrations mashing them with your handy whisk. Mix in paprika, mayonnaise, and mustard powder.

Spoon this mixture back into the holes left by the removed yolks. Sprinkle only a lit bit more paprika over each entire egg for visual effect. Serve.

This is so easy. And it’s considered a gourmet food. Wow! There’s no excuse not to look suave and sophisticated at dinners or potlucks with this recipe.

TIDBITS

1) Paprika is by far the most popular spice in Hungary. The poppy seed is almost revered in that country. Hungarians refused to join the European Community until they were guaranteed unrestricted poppy-seed production. The European Union caved.

2) The ancient Egyptians boiled goose eggs. Apparently, those eggs are indigestible otherwise. A raw goose egg? Ugh. I’ll take the word of the ancients on this one.

3) Spicy stuffed eggs were eaten in 13th century Andalusia, a region of Spain. Spain discovered the New World in the late 15th century. Coincidence? Perhaps.

4) King Louis XV ate boiled eggs every Sunday. This practice ceased with his death.

5) The culinary term “deviled” arose in the late 18th century and referred to highly seasoned or fiery dishes.

6) My wife doesn’t like using the term “devil” in anything. So if you have another name for this dish, I’d appreciate hearing it.

7) Tampa’s baseball team used to be called the Devil Rays. They are now know as the Rays. So, other people must feel the same way.

8) My brother and I had egg holders when we were children in Australia. Neither of us ever played for the Rays. Coincidence? Perhaps.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, history, recipes | Tags: America, American, ancient Egyptians, Andalusia, appetizer, deviled eggs, eggs, Egyptians, European Community, goose eggs, Hungary, Louis XV, mayonnaise, mustard powder, paprika, poppy seed, Rays, Spain, Tampa | Leave a comment

Molettes

Posted on October 11, 2013 by pauldelancey

Mexican Breakfast

MOLETTES

INGREDIENTS

4 rolls
1/4 cup butter
1 1/4 cups refried beans
1 cup grated Four Mexican Cheeses
1/2 cup salsa or pico de gallo

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Let butter soften at room temperature. Cut rolls in half. Remove a little bit of the insides from each half to make a hollow spot. Spread butter over the hollow spots on the roll halves. Put rolls in over. Bakel at 400 degrees for 5-to-10 minutes or until rolls turn crispy and golden brown.

While rolls are baking, cook refried beans in pan at low heat. Put beans in hollow spots in rolls. Add salsa and sprinkle cheese over each roll.

TIDBITS

1) This dish is sold in the morning by street vendors all over Mexico.

2) The east coast of Mexico is on the Gulf of Mexico.

3) Gulf gas stations used to be all over America.

4) America’s Cup goes to the winner of an international sailing event.

5) Sophia Loren, the famous Italian actress, wore a C cup.

6) Vitamin C is good for you. It helps banish colds.

7) Ice cream is cold.

8) So is Iceland.

9) Iceland also has volcanoes. So does Mexico.

10) But Mexicans eat molettes while Icelanders do not.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: America, America's cup, breakfast, C cup, cheeses, Four Mexican, Gulf gas, Gulf of Mexico, Iceland, Mexican, pico de gallo, refried beans, salsa, Sophia Loren, vitamin C, volcanoes | Leave a comment

Korean Army Base Stew

Posted on October 3, 2013 by pauldelancey

Korean Entree

ARMY BASE STEW
(Budae Jjigae)

INGREDIENTS

1 12-ounce can SPAMTM
4 hot dogs
1 12-ounce package firm tofu
1/2 yellow onion
3 stalks green onions
2 cloves garlic
4 cups chicken stock
2 tablespoons gochuchang (hot Korean paste)
1 tablespoon gochucharu (or red pepper flakes)
1 teaspoon sugar
1/2 tablespoon sesame oil

1 3-ounce package ramen (don’t use spice packet)

PREPARATION

Slice SPAM, hot dogs, and tofu into 1/2″ cubes or slices. Dice yellow onion, green onions, and garlic cloves. Add all ingredients except ramen to large pot. Bring to boil on high heat, about 10 minutes, stirring frequently. Reduce to low heat and simmer for 15 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add ramen (no spice backet) and simmer on low 5 minutes. Stir occasionally. It’s spicy and enjoyable.

TIDBITS

1) Koreans love SPAM. Who knew? Okay, smarty pants, besides Koreans.

2) Many Koreans went hungry during and just after the Korean War. Thousands and thousands averted starvation only by getting food from nearby American army bases. The most prevalent gift from the GIs were cans of SPAM. People there are still grateful for this food and SPAM has been adopted into Korean cuisine.

3) I’ve heard that SPAM is popular in the Philippines as well because of the SPAM American soldiers brought with them in 1944 to 1946. My father was stationed in the Philippines after the War as part of America’s SPAM diplomacy.

4) South Korea is a firm ally of America and a strong trading partner. North Korea, however, threatens us with nuclear attack. Why? Because America never got a chance to get its SPAM bearing armies into that land. SPAM brings peace and amity everywhere. Wonderful SPAM, glorious SPAM.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: America, army base stew, budae jjigae, cookbook, De Lancey, diplomacy, entree, GIs, gochuchang, gochucharu, Korea, Korean, Korean War, ramen, recipes, South Korea, spam, tofu, woderful SPAM | Leave a comment

Meatball Pizza

Posted on August 7, 2013 by pauldelancey

Italian Entree

MEATBALL PIZZA

INGREDIENTS

1/2 onion
1 red bell pepper
flour
pizza crust (bought or from below recipe)
1 14.5 ounce can diced tomatoes
1/2 cup pasta sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic
1/2 pound ground beef
2 teaspoons Italian seasoning
1 cup grated mozzarella cheese
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

pizza pan

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Slice onion and bell pepper into thin rings. Cut rings in half. Dust pizza pan with flour and spray with no-stick spray. Put pizza crust on pizza pan. Spread diced tomatoes and its juice evenly over the pizza crust. Spread pasta sauce evenly over the crust.

In small mixing bowl, smoosh garlic and ground beef together. Use hands to form meatballs 1/2″ inch cross. Sprinkle meatballs, Italian seasoning, and mozzarella evenly over pizza. Put pizza in oven and bake at 400 degrees for 10-to-15 minutes or until cheese or crust is golden brown.

TIDBITS

1) Favorite pizza toppings around the world:

America: bacon, ground beef, bell pepper, extra cheese, mushrooms (ugh. Sorry, I don’t like them), onion, pepperoni, sausage, tomatoes
Australia: shrimp, pineapple, barbecue sauce
Brazil: green peas, hard-boil eggs
China: thousand island dressing, eel sushi
Costa Rica: coconut, pineapple
France: flambée (bacon, onion, fresh cream)
Germany: egg, asparagus
India: pickled ginger, lamb, chicken tikka
Japan: ketchup, eel, squid, and Mayo Jaga (mayonnaise, potato, bacon)
Korea: sweet potato, shrimp
Netherlands: double meat, double cheese, double onion
Pakistan: curry
Russia: mockba (a combination of sardines, tuna, mackerel, salmon, and onions), red herring
Venezuela: corn, goat cheese

2) But if you really want to visit the cutting edge of pizza making you must go to Sweden where the following smorgasbord of toppings are popular: allspice, artichoke, banana, bacon, beets, bell pepper, Bearnaise sauce, cabbage, caper, carrot, chicken, chocolate, crab, curry, duck, eggplant, filet mignon, French fries, fruit cocktail, gorgonzola, guacamole, ham, hard-boiled eggs, honey. kebab meat. leeks, mashed potato, mayonnaise, onion, peanut, pepperoni, pickles, pineapple, raisin, salami, sausage, shallot, shrimp, white sauce, taco spices, tuna, and zucchini.

3) I really can’t explain Sweden’s unbridled culinary wildness. Swedish cuisine was much blander when I visited the country some years ago. Was there a mass poisoning of chefs by rotten lutefisk at a culinary convention? It’s quite possible; how can you detect bad lutefisk?

4) There are more pizza toppings in Sweden than are dreamed of in your philosophy.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: allspice, America, Australia, bacon, bell pepper, Brazil, cheese, China, cookbook, Costa Rice, curry, De Lancey, Eat Me, eel, entree, France, garlic, Germany, ground beef, herring, India, Italian, Italian seasoning, Japan, Korea, lutefisk, mackerel, meatball, mockba, mozzarella, Netherlands, onion, Pakistan, pasta sauce, pepperoni, philosophy, pizza, pizza crust, recipes, Russia, sausage, squid, Sweden, Swedish cuisine, tomatoes, tuna, Venezuela | Leave a comment

Tropical Milkshake

Posted on July 16, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Dessert

TROPICAL MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTS

3 bananas (best when ripe)
1 cup coconut milk
1 cup milk
1 cup orange juice (no pulp)
2 tablespoons raspberry syrup

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, coconut milk, milk (moo!), orange juice, and raspberry syrup in blender. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

TIDBITS

1) August 1 is National Raspberry Day. Why? I don’t know. How do you get a national day for anything? Is there a federal form or anything? Life can be so confusing.

2) Some raspberries have a golden-yellowish hue. These are mutant raspberries. Ooh, that sounds like a sci-fi movie from the 50s, Attack of the Mutant Raspberries.

3) It is not generally known that King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain sent Christopher Columbus west to discover new lands teeming with raspberries, raspberries needed to make Tropical Milkshakes.

4) Tidbit 3) is not generally known because it isn’t true.

5) But oh my gosh wouldn’t that have been more interesting.

6) And the natives could have given the illustrious Spanish monarchs the raspberry.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: America, American, bananas, Christopher Columbus, coconut milk, dessert, King Ferdinand, mutant, National RaspberryDay, orange juice, Queen Isabella, raspberry, smoothie, Spain, tropical | Leave a comment

Sunshine Milkshake

Posted on July 8, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Dessert

SUNSHINE MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTS

1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups milk
1 cup orange juice
1/2 cup sugar
2 bananas

SPECIAL UTENSIL

blender

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, milk, orange juice, sugar, and vanilla extract. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

With the time you saved making this simple recipe over a more complicated one, you can read War and Peace.

TIDBITS

1) Seasoned fishermen put vanilla extract on their hands so fish can’t smell them. How fish hundreds of feet deep in the ocean can smell human way up there in a boat is beyond me.

2) If fish have such a good sense of smell, maybe the TSA should hire them to sniff for drugs and explosives at airports.

3) Of course, the TSA would have to provide fish bowls for their aquatic brethren or the fish would die. And stink. And then no one would want to fly, except the bad guys who would be easy to arrest as they were the only ones flying.

4) Unless, of course, the TSA people eat the fish when they die. Maybe use some lemon juice.

5) It’s an interesting legal question. May a fish working for the federal government be eaten?

6) In 1519, Montezuma invited Cortez to share a chocolate drink (Xocolatl) with him. Cortez accepted the invitation. Cortez soon afterward seized Montezuma and executed him. This is more than bad manners on the part of a guest. If Cortez had not gotten into see Montezuma, he couldn’t have decapitated the leadership of the great Aztec nation. The resulting disarray in the Aztec command gave Cortez enough of an advantage to conquer Mexico.

7) The Spanish went on to conquer Central America, much of South America, and what became the southwestern part of the United States. One can only imagine how culinary history would have been changed in the Americas if this had not have happened.

8) So think about that when you invite someone over for hot chocolate.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, recipes | Tags: airports, America, American, Americas, Aztec, bananas, chocolate, cookbook, Cortez, De Lancey, dessert, Mexico, milkshake, Montezuma, orange juice, recipes, Spanish, sugar, sunshine, TSA, United States, vanilla, War and Peace, xocolatl | Leave a comment

Yemeni Chicken Soup

Posted on June 19, 2013 by pauldelancey

Yemeni Soup

CHICKEN SOUP

INGREDIENTS

3 chicken breasts
2 carrots
4 brown potatoes
2 cloves garlic
1 tomato
2 tablespoons hawaij (See recipe for hawaij)
1/2 bunch fresh parsley or 1 cup
1 quart chicken stock

PREPARATION

Cut chicken breasts into 1″ cubes. Peel and cut carrots into 1″ wide slices. Peel and cut potatoes into eighths. Dice garlic cloves. Dice tomatoes.

Add all ingredients to large pot. Cook on high heat until soup boils, stirring occasionally. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 45 minutes. Stir occasionally.

TIDBITS

1) Hawaij is quite close to being spelled Hawaii.

2) Hawaii is the 50th state admitted to the United States of America.

3) In 1950, the New York Yankees swept the Philadelphia Phillies in the World Series.

4) The Philly cheesesteak is a deservedly famous sandwich.

5) Vampires are killed by a stake to the heart.

6) Garlic, though, keeps vampires at bay while being much smaller and cheaper.

7) There is no garlic in my recipe for hawaij. So there is none is this soup.

8) You won’t be able to ward off vampires by showing it this soup. Better to throw the soup at the vampire. Look for your stake and hammer while it’s wiping off its face. Good luck.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, recipes | Tags: America, breasts, cheesesteak, chicken, cookbook, De Lancey, garlic, Hawaii, hawaij, New York Yankees, parsley, Philadelphia, Phillies, Philly, recipes, soup, United States, vampires, World Series, Yemen, Yemeni, Yemenite | Leave a comment

Banana Peanut-Butter Honey Milkshake

Posted on June 13, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Dessert

BANANA PEANUT-BUTTER HONEY MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTS

3 bananas (best when ripe)
2 1/2 cups milk
1/2 cup smooth peanut butter
1/2 tablespoon honey

SPECIAL UTENSIL

blender

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, milk, peanut butter, and honey in blender. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

This tasty milkshake is a diet buster.

TIDBITS

1) Bees must visit two-million flowers to make one pound of honey. The average worker bee makes 1/12 teaspoon in her lifetime. Bees need to unionize for better working conditions.

2) A 15,000-year-old cave painting shows a human stealing honey from a hive. Oh sure, the little bee visits fifty-five millions flowers in her lifetime and then it’s gone. Honestly, it’s enough to make a grown bee cry.

3) Can bees cry?

4) Honey bees do have five eyes.

5) This makes their going to the optometrist a major event, especially as their command of even the simplest human languages is rather limited.

6) This linguistic deficiency often leads to tragedy. The optometrist doesn’t understand the bee’s buzzing. The bee interprets this incomprehension as an aggressive act.

7) The enraged bee stings the optometrist. The optometrist’s face swells up. The optometrist goes to the hospital. The bee dies.

8) No specialized glasses get sold. News of this leaks to Wall Street. The stock market plunges. Economies collapse. Money becomes worthless. And have you stocked up on toilet paper?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

Categories: cuisine, humor | Tags: America, American, banana, bees, dessert, honey, human, languages, milkshake, money, optometrists, peanut butter, stock market, toilet paper, unionize, Wall Street, worker bee | Leave a comment

Posts Tagged With: America

Chocolate and Vanilla Sundae

Simple Tacos

Deviled Eggs

DEVILED EGGS

Molettes

Korean Army Base Stew

Meatball Pizza

Tropical Milkshake

Sunshine Milkshake

SUNSHINE MILKSHAKE

Yemeni Chicken Soup

CHICKEN SOUP

Banana Peanut-Butter Honey Milkshake

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Posts Tagged With: America

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