Posts Tagged With: orange juice

Costa Rican Pork Casado

Costa Rican Entree

PORK CASADO

INGREDIENTSCasado-

8 tablespoons orange juice
4 tablespoons orange zest
2 teaspoons garlic salt
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin

¼ head cabbage
1 small carrot
1 small tomato
¼ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt

1 cup basmati or white rice
1 onion (1 additional onion later)
2 red bell peppers
2 tablespoons vegetable oil (5 additional tablespoons later)

2 plantains
5 tablespoons vegetable oil

1 onion
4 pork loins

1 15-ounce can black beans

PREPARATION MARINADE

Coat pork loins throughly in orange juice, orange zest, garlic salt, chili powder, and cumin.. Let marinate for 30 minutes. Keep marinade.

PREPARATION – SALAD

Shred cabbage. Dice carrot and tomato. Add cabbage, carrot, tomato, pepper, and salt to mixing bowl. Mix with fork.

PREPARATION – RICE

Add rice to pot. Cook rice according to instructions on package. While rice cooks, mince 1 onion and red bell peppers. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Keep rice and onion/bell pepper mix warm.

PREPARATION – PLANTAINS

Peel plantains. Slice plantains in half lengthwise. Add 5 tablespoons vegetable oil and plantain to pan. Sauté on medium heat for 5 minutes or until plantains become tender and turn golden brown. Drain and keep warm.

PREPARATION – PORK

Cut onion into four slices. Grill onion and pork loins on barbecue grill at high or 450 degrees. Grill onions for 10 minutes or until they start to char. Turn them over once. Grill pork for 20 minutes or until it is cooked through (white inside) or starts to brown. Turn over every 5 minutes. Brush with marinade each time.

PREPARATION – FINAL

Put beans in pot. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until sauce begins to bubble. Add pork to plate with grilled onion slice on top. Add rice to side and top with onion/red pepper mix. Add 2 plantains to the side. (Lots of sides, aren’t there?) Add cabbage to a remaining spot on plate and top with carrot and tomato.

(snarky comment. ☜ Weeks later: I was interrupted by a melee in the house, plate tectonics, or something, so I typed “snarky comment” as a place filler. Clearly, I had hoped to come back in a jiffy with a brilliant thought intact. However, my brilliance was as fleeting as the perfect ripeness of an avocado. So let this be a cautionary tale to everyone; write down your thoughts if you suspect a bout of plate tectonics coming on.)

Enjoy!

TIDBITS

1) This recipe is made with orange zest. As far as I know there are no movies titles with the word zest in them.

3) But there is a classic movie called “Lust for Life” starring Kirk Douglas and Anthony Quinn. It’s about the life of Vincent Van Gogh.

4) Van Gogh was an artist. So am I. I had a vase displayed in the Gemente Museum in the The Hague, Netherlands.

5) I am much more into cooking now. The upcoming movie about my life is likely to be called, “Lust for Zest.”

6) Any dish I create gets eaten.

7) You are not allowed to eat paintings in art museums, particularly so at the Louvre in Paris.

8) Not even if you bring the correct spices and wine. However, you can eat popcorn at the movies. As of press time, however, few movie theaters serve gourmet dinners and fine wine. It’s a hard world out there.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Tropical Milkshake

American Dessert

TROPICAL MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTS??????????

3 bananas (best when ripe)
1 cup coconut milk
1 cup milk
1 cup orange juice (no pulp)
2 tablespoons raspberry syrup

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, coconut milk, milk (moo!), orange juice, and raspberry syrup in blender. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

TIDBITS

1) August 1 is National Raspberry Day. Why? I don’t know. How do you get a national day for anything? Is there a federal form or anything? Life can be so confusing.

2) Some raspberries have a golden-yellowish hue. These are mutant raspberries. Ooh, that sounds like a sci-fi movie from the 50s, Attack of the Mutant Raspberries.

3) It is not generally known that King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain sent Christopher Columbus west to discover new lands teeming with raspberries, raspberries needed to make Tropical Milkshakes.

4) Tidbit 3) is not generally known because it isn’t true.

5) But oh my gosh wouldn’t that have been more interesting.

6) And the natives could have given the illustrious Spanish monarchs the raspberry.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Sunshine Milkshake

American Dessert

SUNSHINE MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTSSunshineMilk-

1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups milk
1 cup orange juice
1/2 cup sugar
2 bananas

SPECIAL UTENSIL

blender

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, milk, orange juice, sugar, and vanilla extract. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

With the time you saved making this simple recipe over a more complicated one, you can read War and Peace.

TIDBITS

1) Seasoned fishermen put vanilla extract on their hands so fish can’t smell them. How fish hundreds of feet deep in the ocean can smell human way up there in a boat is beyond me.

2) If fish have such a good sense of smell, maybe the TSA should hire them to sniff for drugs and explosives at airports.

3) Of course, the TSA would have to provide fish bowls for their aquatic brethren or the fish would die. And stink. And then no one would want to fly, except the bad guys who would be easy to arrest as they were the only ones flying.

4) Unless, of course, the TSA people eat the fish when they die. Maybe use some lemon juice.

5) It’s an interesting legal question. May a fish working for the federal government be eaten?

6) In 1519, Montezuma invited Cortez to share a chocolate drink (Xocolatl) with him. Cortez accepted the invitation. Cortez soon afterward seized Montezuma and executed him. This is more than bad manners on the part of a guest. If Cortez had not gotten into see Montezuma, he couldn’t have decapitated the leadership of the great Aztec nation. The resulting disarray in the Aztec command gave Cortez enough of an advantage to conquer Mexico.

7) The Spanish went on to conquer Central America, much of South America, and what became the southwestern part of the United States. One can only imagine how culinary history would have been changed in the Americas if this had not have happened.

8) So think about that when you invite someone over for hot chocolate.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Citrus Agua Fresca from Mexico

Mexican Dessert

CITRUS AGUA FRESCA

INGREDIENTSCitrAguaFre-

2 1/2 cups water
1/2 cup lime juice
1 1/2 cups orange juice
1 1/2 cups pineapple juice
6 tablespoons confectionary sugar

PREPARATION

Use long wooden spoon to mix all ingredients in pitcher. Stir until sugar dissolves. This goes well served over ice.

TIDBITS

1) Doesn’t the list of ingredients look like a ski slope?

2) One of the most popular sports televison ever was “The Wide World of Sports.” The intro to the program shows an athlete performing a great feat to the “thrill of victory and an athlete failing to the words “the agony of defeat.

3) The victorious athlete changed quite a few times. However, the failing athlete was Vinko Bogataj. Vinko wiped out in spectacular fashion just moments after starting to ski down a steep slope. Vinko remained blissfully unaware that tens of millions of people had been watching his snow tumble every week for twenty years.

4) Success is overrated. We remember spectacular failures. We embrace them.

5) Eddie the Eagle represented Britain in the 1988 Winter Olympics. He would soar like an eagle with folded wings. Eddie’s ski jumps brought him last place in every event he entered. He might have set records for the short jumps if the Olympics had bothered track such a thing.

6) Naturally Eddie became a national hero. The world remembered his name for decades. The winners in the ski jump? Tee hee.

7) Who can name a movie about bobsled gold medals? No one. Well, practically no one. But millions have seen the movie about the Jamaican bobsled Olympians, “Cool Runnings.” They didn’t win a medal. They only achieved cinematic immortality.

8) As the song says, “We don’t need another hero.” We need another Citrus Agua Fresca.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Chicken Mango With White Wine Recipe

Bahamian Entree

CHICKEN MANGO WITH WHITE WINE

INGREDIENTSChicMan-

3 chicken breasts
4 garlic cloves
2 mangoes
2 1/2 cups white wine
4 tablespoons butter
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ginger
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 cup orange juice
1 tablespoon lime juice
2 tablespoons soy sauce

PREPARATION

Cut chicken breasts into fourths. Mince garlic cloves. Peel mangoes and cut off the fleshy part into strips. Pour wine into large pot. Put chicken into pot. Cook on high heat for 7 minutes. Pour 1 cup of liquid from the pot into a cup and save. Remove the rest. (This is probably not the best recipe for your Dom Perignon.)

Add butter and garlic to pan with chicken. Fry for about 7 minutes or until chicken starts to turn golden brown. Add saved wine, mango strips, cinnamon, ginger, black pepper, orange juice, and soy sauce. Simmer at low heat with lid on for 10 minutes. Serve to appreciative guests.

TIDBITS

1) Mangos are the most popular fruit in the World

2) Really?

3) The paisley pattern used on ties is based on the mango.

4) Why not ties based on tacos or brownies?

5) Or even tie pattern with a strong marinara theme. That way if you’re having a job interview at a fancy Italian restaurant and you spill marinara sauce on your tie they’ll never notice.

6) Buddha meditated under the cool shade of a mango tree. Sipping a Roy Rogers works for me.

7) I like to think Buddha would have enjoyed a nice, cooling Roy Rogers drink.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

Categories: cuisine, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Juice And Sugar-Glazed Ham

American Entree

JUICE AND SUGAR-GLAZED HAM

INGREDIENTS

8.84 pounds spiral-cut ham
1/2 cup pear juice
1/2 cup orange juice
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup honey
1 tablespoons grated orange peel or orange zest
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons honey

SPECIAL UTENSIL

baster

PREPARATION

(If you can’t find a spiral-cut ham that weighs exactly 8.84 pounds, then anything from 6 to 10 pounds will do. Remember improvise, improvise, improvise. For example, if your recipe calls for Moroccan camel cheese to be sprinkled atop your Saharan crepe and your guests are arriving in five minutes and all you have is Four-Mexican cheese blend, use the Mexican cheese. At that point you can hope no one notices the substitution, lie about the substitution, or brag about your ability to cook Moroccan-Mexican fusion.)

Meanwhile back at the recipe, grate an orange peel. Place ham, cut end down, in large baking pan. Cook ham according to directions on its package.

Combine pear juice and orange juice in mixing bowl. After one hour of cooking, take the ham out of the oven and baste the ham with the orange-and-pear-juices mixture. This step really is easiest with a baster. Put ham back in oven.

Take ham out of oven. Combine brown sugar, grated orange peels or orange zest, honey, and 1/4 cup of drippings from ham in second mixing bowl. Picking up the drippings is easiest and safest with a baster. (If you have already cleaned your mixing bowl, you are an outstanding chef and worthy of the admiration of everyone.) Brush this mixture all over the exposed portion of the ham about an hour before the ham is supposed to be done. (You did save the cooking instructions that came with the ham, didn’t you?) Put ham back in oven.

TIDBITS

1) Eating pig is forbidden to Muslims. Eating beef is forbidden to Hindus. Even biting something cooked in the fat of those animals is impermissible.

2) Cartridges used by the world’s armies in 1856 were often coated in animal grease.

3) In 1856, many of the British Army’s soldiers in India were native Muslims or Hindus. The Moslem soldiers thought their cartridges were coated with pig fat. Religious outrage. The Hindus soldiers felt their bullets were dipped in cow fat. Religious outrage.

4) So the native Indian soldiers rebelled against British rule. Thousands and thousands of people died and many atrocities were committed before the British gained the upper hand.

5) See, proper spicing matters, whether in cooking or maintaining a world-wide empire.

6) If only the British had used duck grease to coat their cartridges. Hardly anyone has religious reservations about duck grease.

7) And everyone likes doughnuts.

8) However, may I recommend frying doughnuts made with vegetable oil, acceptable on every continent? We have a lot of nuclear weapons littering the Earth and the next World War is bound to be a downer.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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