recipes

Åland Semolina Pancake with Prune Sauce

Posted on August 2, 2014 by pauldelancey

Finnish Breakfast

ÅLAND SEMOLINA PANCAKE WITH PRUNE SAUCE

INGREDIENTS – PANCAKEAlandSemolina-

2¾ cups milk
¾ cup semolina or Cream of WheatTM
½ tablespoon cardamom
4 eggs
¼ teaspoon salt
¾ cup sugar
1 cup flour
no-stick spray.

INGREDIENTS – PRUNE SAUCE

12 pitted prunes
3⅔ cups water (½ cup more later)
1 cinnamon stick
1 cup sugar
2 tablespoons corn flour
⅓ cup water

whipped cream (optional or is it?)

SPECIAL UTENSIL

9″ x 12″ baking dish

Serves 8

PREPARATION – PANCAKE

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Spray baking dish with no-stick spray.

Add milk to pot. Simmer milk on low heat until milk warms. Stir frequently. Gradually add in semolina. Stir constantly to prevent lumps. Remove semolina porridge from heat.

Add cardamom, eggs, salt, and sugar to large mixing bowl. Mix with whisk until foamy. (Scare away unwanted visitors by smearing this mixture on your mouth before you open the front door.) Add flour and semolina porridge to mixing bowl. Stir with whisk until batter is well blended.

Pour batter into baking dish. Put baking dish in oven. Bake at 400 degrees for 30-to-6o minutes or until pancake is firm and golden brown.

PREPARATION – PRUNE SAUCE

While pancake bakes, dice prunes. Add prunes and 3⅔ cups water to pot. Soak for 40 minutes. Add cinnamon stick. Boil to boil on high heat. Reduce heat to medium-high and cook for xx minutes or until prunes soften. Add sugar. Stir until sugar dissolves. Remove from heat.

Add corn flour and ⅓ cup water to small bowl, . Mix with whisk until well blended. Add corn flour/water mix to pot. Bring prune sauce to boil using high heat. Stir constantly. Cook for 1 minute or until prune sauce thickens. Remove cinnamon stick. Pour into serving tray.

PREPARATION – FINAL

Cut pancake into 8 squares. Top pancakes square with prune sauce and whipped cream, if necessary. (Oh, of course it is.)

TIDBITS

1) The penalty for speeding in Finland varies with income. An American CEO might be fined over a million dollars. Tough country on scofflaws, you bet.

2) If you lose your shirt to Finland’s highway patrol, why not indulge your self with a Sauna? Be advised, social norms require you to be naked in the sauna. But you’re already half disrobed, having forfeited your shirt in tidbit 1).

3) It’s also quite acceptable for a bunch of friends to go to sauna together. Where everyone is naked. Good friends indeed.

4) Finland must not have many introverts.

5) It’s considered normal to leave the sauna, run outside, and jump in the nearest lake.

6) Although if its winter, it’s advisable to cut a hole in the lake before jumping.

7) Finns must have strong hearts.

8) What do Finns do if the nearest lake is twenty-six miles away and it’s freezing outside?

9) Run fast! It’s quite possible that Finland has the greatest number of saunas that are exactly twenty-six miles, the distance of a marathon, away of any nation in the world. This explains why Finland routinely garners the gold, silver, and bronze medals at every Nude Winter Marathon event.

10) Ancient Greeks invented the marathon. Or did they? Current speculation has Greece being invaded and settled by Finns around 1,700 B.C.. Finding ancient spas in Greece would go along way to proving this theory to the scientific community.

11) Some people point to the modern nude marathoners of Finland and the naked ancient Greek athletes as evidence of a vast Graeco-Finn empire around 1,450 B.C.. Why is there no evidence of this enormous realm? The au naturel Finns and Greeks, of course, wore no shirts. No shirts, no shirt pockets. No shirt pockets, no pens. No pens, no written history, and Bob’s your uncle.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Danish Egg Cake (æggekage)

Posted on July 29, 2014 by pauldelancey

Danish Entree

EGG CAKE
(æggekage)

INGREDIENTSEggCake-

12 ounces bacon
1/2 small onion
¼ cup fresh basil
8 eggs
¼ cup flour
1½ cups milk
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSILS

electric beater
large oven-proof pan

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 430 degrees. Cut bacon into ½” squares. Mince onion. Dice basil. Fry bacon in an on medium-high heat until golden and crispy. Stir frequently. (Be careful. Use one hand to hold the lid between you and the bacon or tilt the pan away from you when you stir.) Remove bacon and set on paper towel to drain. Clean pan.

Add eggs, flour, milk, pepper, and salt to mixing bowl. Mix with electric beater send on lowest setting until well blended and eggs begin to fluff. Spray oven-proof pan with no-stick spray. Add egg/flour mixture to pan. Reduce heat to medium. Cook for 4 minutes.

Place pan in oven Bake at 430 degrees for 15 minutes or until pancake becomes golden brown. Remove pancake from oven. Sprinkle bacon squares, onion, and basil on middle of egg pancake.

TIDBITS

1) Denmark in Danish is Danmark. Danmark was named after a man called Dan. Cool. When I become supreme ruler of the world, this planet will be known as Paul.

2) Rabbit jumping shows are popular in Denmark. These events have an even greater following in its birthplace, Sweden, where it is known as “Kaninhoppning”.

3) Rabbithopping-USA and the U.S. Rabbit Agility Association sponsor America’s rabbit jumping contests. It’s still much more popular in Sweden and Denmark. Sweden has been at peace since 1814; Denmark since 1945. America has fought multiple wars since then. Coincidence? Perhaps.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Burmese Semolina Cake (sanwin makin)

Posted on July 27, 2014 by pauldelancey

Burmese Dessert

SEMOLINA CAKE
(sanwin makin)

INGREDIENTSSemolinaCake-

1 16-ounce can coconut cream
or 2 14-ounces cans coconut milk.
3 eggs
2 tablespoons sesame seeds
1 cup semolina or cream of wheat
1 cup sugar
¼ cup ghee or butter
½ teaspoon cardamom

Note: if you need to make coconut cream from coconut milk, you will need to keep cans of coconut milk in the fridge overnight.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

8″ square cake pan

PREPARATION – COCONUT CREAM (If you can’t find it in stores.)

Chill coconut milk cans in refrigerator for 24 hours. Open cans and scoop out the thick cream on the top. Keep 16 ounces, or 2 cups, of coconut cream. Use the rest of the coconut cream and the liquid in the bottom of the cans to make coconut-based smoothies

PREPARATION – ONCE YOU HAVE COCONUT CREAM.

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Separate egg yolks from egg whites.

Add sesame seeds to pan. Fry sesame seeds for 3 minutes at medium heat or until seeds brown. Stir constantly. Remove seeds from heat.

Add semolina to large pot. Slowly add in the coconut cream, stirring each time to prevent lumps. Add sugar. Stir until sugar dissolves. Bring to boil using medium heat for 3-to-5 minutes or until mixture begins to thicken. Stir constantly. Add ghee. Cook for 2 minutes or until mixture thickens to the point that it leaves the side of the pot. Remove from heat.

Add cardamom and eggs yolks to pot. Mix with whisk until this batter is well blended. Add egg whites to small mixing bowl. Whisk egg whites until they thicken and form peaks. Fold egg whites into batter. Pour batter into cake pan. Top with sesame seeds. Bake at 325 degrees for about 45 minutes or until cake start to brown or a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean.

Let cool in cake pan. Cut into squares and serve warm.

TIDBITS

1) The Burma-Vita company first produced Burma ShaveTM in 1925. The product was said to include products from Burma. Antarctic Shave wouldn’t have worked. It BurmaShavewould have had to included ice and cubes and penguin meat. No one would have wanted to shave with that, particularly during the summer.

2) At first Burma Shave only sold a bit better than Antarctic Shave.

3) Then Burma Shave came out with a brushless shaving cream. To promote this new, improved product they came up with a brilliant advertising campaign. They put a series of six small signs in a row alongside major roads. Early motorists got a chuckle out of reading them.

4) And they bought Burma Shave. The company became the second-largest seller of brushless shaving cream. The number-one company sold more.

5) Sales of Burma Shave after declined after the development of the atomic bomb.

6) This is probably coincidence.

7) But roadside Burma-Shave signs got put up less and less often with new advancement of nuclear weaponry. Indeed, about a year after the world almost went wonky during the Cuban Missile Crisis, the signs all got taken down.

8) Why do advertisers always say, “new and improved?” Shouldn’t “improved” be implied? Is there really a possibility of companies proudly putting out an product that’s “new and worsened?” How can something be improved if it’s new? You can only improve something that’s been around for a while.

9) Indeed, the first ICBM was just plain new. Now, the second generation of ICBMs could have be improved, but the whole ICBM concept was no longer new. Could the company that made the ICBMs have boasted of “new and improved” nuclear warfare. If so, I must have missed the radio jingle.

10) But the fond memories of the Burma-Shave signs never left our hearts. They would show up again and again in literature, including the very best of cat-herding novels, The Fur West.

11) There is no evidence that cats ever read the Burma-Shave signs. Cats do not shave. Coincidence?
Perhaps.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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My Inert Self

Posted on July 24, 2014 by pauldelancey

People keep telling me to get in touch with my inert self. I did. Nothing happened.

– Zen Paul

 

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Gallo Pinto

Posted on July 23, 2014 by pauldelancey

Nicaraguan Entree

GALLO PINTO

INGREDIENTSGalloPinto-

1 medium onion (1 more onion later)
2 garlic cloves
2 tablespoons vegetable oil (2 tablespoons more later)
1½ cup white rice
3 cups vegetable or chicken broth
½ teaspoon salt
1 medium onion
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 pound cooked red beans (Drain if from can)
2 tablespoons fresh cilantro

PREPARATION

Mince 1 onion and garlic cloves. Add 2 tablespoons oil, 1 minced onion, and garlic cloves to pot. Sauté on medium-high heat or until onion softens Stir frequently. Add rice. Sauté rice for 3 minutes or until grains are shiny and coated with oil. Stir constantly. (Sautéing the rice will keep it from becoming mushy when boiled later.)

Add broth and salt. Bring to boil using medium-high heat until most of the liquid has evaporated and bubbles appear on surface of rice. Cover and reduce heat to warm. Simmer on warm for 15 minutes. Do not stir rice. (The rice can be prepared up to 24 hours in advance.)

While rice simmers, mince 1 onion and dice cilantro. Add 2 tablespoons vegetable oil and 1 minced onion to pan. Sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add red beans and this batch of sautéed onion to pot. Cook on low-medium heat for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. Garnish with cilantro.

TIDBITS

1) The people of Masaya celebrates the Festival of San Lazaro by dressing up their dogs in elaborate costumes and giving thanks at church for their pets good health.

2) By all means go to the towns of San Juan de Oriente, Diriá, and Diriomo for their fiestas. Their dancing warriors beat each other over the head with bulls’ penises.

3) There are no street names in Nicaragua! Addresses are given by referring to major land marks. My home would be three blocks south from the restaurant where I believe that guy got murdered a couple of decades ago. Then turn left at the first intersection past the one with traffic lights. I have an olive tree and a few cacti in front. Of course, you might get lost trying to find that restaurant. It happened long enough ago that most people don’t know about it. Let me know if you’re in the neighborhood and I’ll send up a flare.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Spicy Spanish Potatoes – Patatas Bravas

Posted on July 21, 2014 by pauldelancey

Spanish Entree

PATATAS BRAVAS

(spicy potatoes)

INGREDIENTSPatatasBravas-

3 garlic cloves
½ onion
2 Roma tomatoes
1 tablespoon flour
½ cup water
5 medium russet potatoes
½ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
2 ½ tablespoons olive oil (½ cup more later)
¾ teaspoon cayenne pepper
2 teaspoons Spanish paprika (or paprika)
¼ teaspoon thyme
½ teaspoon sugar
½ cup olive oil
½ tablespoon parsley

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves, onion, and tomatoes. Add flour to ½ cup water. Stir until flour dissolves. Put potatoes in large pot and cover them with water. Bring to boil using high heat. Reduce heat to medium and cook for 20 minutes or until potatoes are soft. Carefully remove potatoes and let them cool. Cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Add potato cubes, pepper, and salt to mixing bowl. Turn potato cubes until they are coated with pepper and salt.

Add 2½ tablespoons olive oil and garlic, onion, and cayenne pepper to pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens and garlic browns. Stir frequently. Reduce heat to low. Add tomato, paprika, thyme, sugar, and dissolved flour. Simmer on low heat for 20 minutes. Stir occasionally.

While tomato/garlic/onion/spice mix simmers, add ½ cup olive oil and potato cubes to second pan. Sauté on high heat for 5-to-10 minutes or until potatoes turn golden brown. Stir constantly Remove potato cubes and place them on paper towels to remove excess oil. Put potatoes in bowls and top with tomato sauce. Garnish with parsley.

TIDBITS

1) Gerona, Spain has a dating agency for pets. Happy Animals caters to lovelorn dogs, cats and birds. The mind boggles.

2) You are more likely to be robbed in Spain than anywhere else.

3) Sure, with all those cash-strapped Spaniards needing to pony up big Euros for their animals’ social lives.

4) However, Spain started paying women around a thousand dollars for each baby they have. If they want, the señoras can spend their money at Happy Animals. Maybe with all that extra cash, the robbery rate will fall.

5) If robbery rates fall, people can spend the money they would have spent on alarm systems for their homes on romantic dinners.

6) If Spanish couples have enough romantic dinners, they will have more babies.

7) It costs money to raise babies. A lot more than $1,000. The money to pay for these kids will have to come from somewhere.

9) From cutting out Doggy Dating Centers or taking up robbery. Tough choice.

10) Most Spanish women will curtail their dogs’ love lives.

11) But not all. Home burglaries will soar. Spanish families will have to spend more money on home security. Where will they get the money for all these alarms?

16) From robbing people’s homes. Spaniards will spend ever more money protecting their abode.

17) This will spiral out of control. Lawlessness will stalk the land.

18) The Spanish government will have to step in. The army will have to patrol every home on every street to keep order.

19) But not for long. Spanish families will have no money to pay their taxes. They will have spent it all on burglar alarms. The Spanish government won’t be able to pay its army. Mutinies will break out among the soldiers. This will occur in small units at first. Nothing will coordinated. But the trend will be unmistakable.

20) Where will the authorities get the money to pay its fighting men?

21) From saffron. Saffron costs seven dollars a gram. It’s far more expensive than oil.

22) How will the Spanish get enough saffron to pay its army?

23) By invading Iran. Iran is a huge producer of saffron. Won’t Iran fight back? Yes, it will.

24) And that’s bad. Iran could very well develop nuclear weapons in the near future. Iran also has lots of enemies who will inevitably be drawn into the Spanish-Iranian War. The war will spread until it becomes global. We will have Armageddon.

25) That’s bad. So, let your pets find their own soul mates. It’ll be character building experience for them and save the world as well. Remember, the culinary arts will the first to go after the apocalypse.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Peanut Soup

Posted on July 4, 2014 by pauldelancey

Cameroonian Soup

PEANUT SOUP

INGREDIENTSPeanutSoup-

1 red chile pepper
1 yellow onion
2 tomatoes
2 garlic cloves
1 green bell pepper
⅓ cup unsalted peanuts
2 tablespoons peanut oil
4 cups vegetable or chicken broth
1 cup peanut butter (smooth or chunky)
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup baby spinach

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder

PREPARATION

Remove seeds from red chile pepper. Dice onion and tomatoes. Mince garlic cloves, green bell pepper, and red chile pepper. Grind peanuts in spice grinder.

Add peanut oil, garlic, onion, green bell pepper, and red chile pepper to pot. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Add vegetable broth, peanut butter, tomato, pepper, and salt. Stir until peanut butter dissolves into soup. Reduce heat to low. Simmer for 15 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add spinach. Simmer on low for another 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Ladle soup into bowls. Top soup with ground peanuts.

TIDBITS

1) In 1472, Portuguese explorers named one of Cameroon’s rivers Rio dos Camarões after all the shrimp in it. This is how the country, Cameroon, gets it name. Way cool. I wish where I lived could be renamed Taco. I love tacos.

2)In 1931, Cameroon sent $3.77 to America’s starving. Or they could have sent shrimp.

3) The world’s biggest specie of frog lives in Cameroon. One of them is called Jeremiah.

4)The yellow stripe in Cameroon’s flag represents sunshine. Antarctica, if it ever becomes a country, should have a white stripe representing snow and a beaker in honor of all the scientists living there.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Tex Mex T Rex

Posted on May 23, 2014 by pauldelancey

Cretaceous Entree

TEX MEX T REX

INGREDIENTSTRex-

1 medium tyrannosaurus rex
300 garlic cloves
1,500 medium yellow onions
2,999 jars (18 ounces) barbecue sauce
1 15 ounce bottle organic ketchup
200 pounds chili powder
100 pounds cumin
25 pounds thyme
1/4 teaspoon salt (or to taste)
40 gallons lemon juice
120 gallons Worcestershire sauce
12,000 hamburger buns

Note: Getting the amounts exact is critical. If your sums are off you just have to recount.

SPECIAL UTENSILS

1 time machine
1 sonic obliterator (not sold in Oregon as of publication)
1 culinary chainsaw (I recommend the Bushnell 303TM model)
1,500 crock pots
1 multi-story mixing bowl
1 24,000-hole toaster
1 deluxe surge protector

PREPARATION

Set time machine to Wednesday, June 3rd, 3 p.m., 65,403,002 B.C.. (For goodness sake, don’t push things and try to get yourself a T-Rex minutes before that giant meteorite slams into the Earth killing nearly everything. If you die in this cataclysm and don’t come back, your guests will never talk to you. You don’t need this social awkwardness.)

But it does remind me, to make Tex Mex T Rex you really need to kill a T Rex. For this job, you’ll want to get a premium sonic obliterator. One with a T-Rex rating. Don’t expect to waltz into a WalMartTM and buy the first sonic obliterator you see. You’ll be sorry. Indeed, you’ll be dead when the feeble sonic vibration from your off-the-shelves obliterator merely angers the T Rex into charging you. Always, always buy quality kitchen utensils.

Do not forget to kill the T-Rex. Be sure to slice up the T Rex into the various cuts of meat at the site and the time of the killing. This takes a long time and culinary chainsaws are noisy. You don’t want to annoy your current time, human neighbors. But in the Cretaceous period the chainsaw noise will scare off all those pesky predators who’d want to eat you. Take all your T-Rex cuts back with you. Don’t drop any. No one likes a litterbug.

Mince garlic cloves and onions. This should take no time at all as you have a time machine. Put T-Rex bits in crock pots. Add garlic, onion, barbecue sauce, organic ketchup, chili powder, cumin, salt, thyme, lemon juice, and Worcestershire sauce.

Set crock pots to high and cover them. Cook for 6 hours or until meat is tender. Remove T-Rex meat. Shred meat and return meat to crock pots for 30 minutes. Toast buns. Serve meat on buns. Note, this is a big meal. May I suggest serving it picnic style with plastic utensils and cardboard plates?

TIDBITS

1) Until the invention of the time machine, Cretaceous cuisine was impossible,

2) We have, of course, always had Cretan cuisine. However, food from the island of Crete is usually considered to be indistinguishable from the rest of Greek cuisine.

3) However, things would change dramatically if a Cretan restaurateur were to successfully transport T-Rex meat back to the current time. Crowds would certainly flock to Kronos’ Cretan Cretaceous Crudités.

4) This development would certainly provide a challenge to the Tex Mex T Rex cuisine of southwest Texas.

5) As of press time, 43% of all Tex Mex T Rex sandwiches are served in El Paso, Texas.

6) There are lots of non-culinary things to do in El Paso, Texas.

7) Be sure to take in the town’s T-Rex processing plant. Tours cost $20 person if you book now. However, the cost conscious can always go back in time, deposit a dollar in the bank, and gather enough interest to pay for the tour.

8) For an alternative experience, go to Hueco Tanks State Park and scale its huge boulders.

9) Those in your group who survive this experience will want to take in the Museum of Art and see American and Mexican colonial art.

10) Stargazing is quite popular here, especially at night.

11) So is sleeping.

12) Pleasant dreams.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Peanut Sauce (pinda saus)

Posted on May 15, 2014 by pauldelancey

Dutch appetizer

PEANUT SAUCE
(pinda saus)

INGREDIENTSPeanutSauce-

1 garlic clove
½ teaspoon lemon juice
¼ teaspoon lemongrass
¾ cup milk
¾ cup smooth peanut butter
4 tablespoons soy sauce
¼ teaspoon brown sugar
¼ teaspoon sambal oelek (omit if you can’t find it or desire a less spicy sauce)

PREPARATION

Mince garlic clove. Add garlic, lemon juice, and lemongrass to pan. Sauté on medium-high heat for about 3 minutes or until garlic softens. Stir frequently. Add milk, peanut butter, soy sauce, brown sugar, and sambal oelek. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until it just starts to boil. Stir frequently. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 3 minutes until mixture thickens. Stir frequently.

Goes well with: sticky rice, satays, bami goreng, egg rolls, and loempias.

TIDBITS

1) The Netherlands supplies 70% of the world’s bacon. Yay!

2) The Spanish Inquistion sentenced everyone in the Netherlands to death in 1568 . Tough love, you bet.

3) The Netherlands supplies 70% of the world’s bacon. Woot!

4) Amsterdam is home to the greatest number of museums in any one city, including ones dedicated to sex museums. Honey, I’m just going to the museum to improve my mind.

5) The Netherlands supplies 70% of the world’s bacon. Thank you, Netherlands.

7) Amsterdam’s coffee shops can sell you up to 5 grams of cannabis. And then you’ll be hungry for … bacon!

8) The Netherlands supplies 70% of the world’s bacon. Satisfy your bacon munchies here.

9) When not producing bacon, the Dutch are known to indulge in engineering marvels and the arts.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bubble and Squeak

Posted on April 5, 2014 by pauldelancey

British Entree

BUBBLE AND SQUEAK

INGREDIENTSBubble&Squeak-

4 potatoes
2 tablespoons butter (2 more teaspoons later)
½ head cabbage
2 celery stalks
1 onion
2 tablespoons butter
4 ounces bacon
¼ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt

PREPARATION

Peel potatoes. Cut each potato into eight pieces. Put potato pieces into large pot. Add enough water to cover potato bits. Bring water to boil on high heat. Reduce heat to low and simmer for about 20 minutes or until potato is tender. Drain potatoes. Add 2 tablespoons butter to pot with potato pieces. Mash potatoes with potato masher.

While potatoes simmer, thinly slice cabbage. Put cabbage with enough water to cover and cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until cabbage is tender. Dice celery, and onion. Add onion, celery, and 2 tablespoons butter to large skillet. Sauté onion and celery for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Add bacon to frying pan. Fry bacon on medium-high heat or until bacon starts to turn crispy. Remove bacon and press with paper towels to remove grease. Cut bacon into 1″ squares.

Add mashed potato, cabbage, bacon, celery, onion, pepper, and salt to large skillet. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until bottom (The mixture in the skillet, not your bottom. Goodness.) turns golden brown. Turn mixture over and cook for another 5 minutes or until it browns again on the bottom.

TIDBITS

1) This traditional British dish is named after the bubbling and squeaking sounds it makes while being cooked. The earliest known recipe comes from Maria Rundell, who made it in 1806. No, I do not know what she did in 1805. Still, knowing this fact will give you an advantage over the other contests in JeopardyTM when the Bubble and Squeak category comes up.

2) Bubble and squeak is also Cockney rhyming slang for Greek. Just like fashion and fad is Cockney for iPad. Similarly, Pow and socko for taco, Sang froid and calm for A-bomb, symphonies and coda for soda, large rat and busy bee for reality TV, Jeb and Jethro for cilantro, grovel and beg for nutmeg, mite and midge for fridge, bondsman and post bail for junk mail, and, of course, tasty and new for chicken cordon bleu.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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