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Sausage Cheese Grits

American Breakfast

SAUSAGE CHEESE GRITS

INGREDIENTSSausCheesGrit-

1 cup uncooked grits
4 cups water
1 pound pork sausage
1 7-ounce can green chiles
6 tablespoons butter
3 eggs
1 cup grated cheddar cheese
1/2 teaspoon ScotchbBonnet sauce or TabascoTM sauce
1 tablespoon parsley

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Add grits and water to pot. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes or until mixture thickens. Cook sausage and green chiles in pan on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until sausage browns.

Combine butter, eggs, cheese, and Scotch bonnet sauce, grits, and sausage/chile mix to casserole dish. Sprinkle parsley on top. Put casserole dish in oven. Bake for 60 minutes at 350 degrees.

TIDBITS

1) I don’t know how many grits are in a tablespoon. There are, however, about 20,000 grains of sugar per tablespoon.

2) All you have to do to get grits/tablespoon ratio is to multiply 20,000 (the number of sugar grains in a tablespoon) by the (volume of the average sugar grain/volume of the average grit).

3) Simple, once you’ve measured a grit and a sugar grain with a teeny, tiny ruler.

4) You cannot buy a single grit. It tends to be sold in bulk. The stand unit of measurement for grits is a bowl.

5) You can purchase a single Grit magazine if you really, really want to buy a single Grit.

6) It is easier to eat a single Scotch bonnet pepper than the bonnets women of the Old West wore on their heads, it is much spicier as well. So it’s kinda of a trade off.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Yansoon (aniseed drink)

Egyptian Dessert

YANSOON
(aniseed drink)

INGREDIENTSYansoon-

4 cups water
6 tablespoons aniseed
2 tablespoons sugar

SPECIAL UTENSIL

tea strainer
or
cheesecloth

PREPARATION

Boil all ingredients together for 2 minutes. Stir until sugar dissolves. Pour through tea strainer or cheesecloth into teapot or cups. You’re done. Enjoy.

TIDBITS

1) Yansoon is an anagram for Nano soy.

2) Nano means one billionth. A nano soy is one billionth of a soy.

3) How can you have one billionth of a soy? Maybe a tiny part of a soy bean.

4) Tofu is made from soy. So, it’s probably the merest speck of a tofu cube.

5) A mere speck is just a tiny dot. A meerkat is a mammal. The San Diego Zoo has meerkats.

6) Did you know that a colony, or is it a coagulation, of meerkats always has a designated lookout. This sentinel’s only job is to search the sky and warn the colony of approaching hawks?

7) There are no hawks at the San Diego Zoo, so this precaution is unnecessary.

8) But it’s not harmful either. And how do these San Diegan meerkats know for sure they won’t wake up tomorrow in Hawkland?

9) If a job is worth doing, it’s worth doing well. Would the many, many industrial accidents and disasters throughout the years have occurred if meerkats had been overseeing the projects? I think not.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Spam Burger From Hawaii

Hawaiian Entree

SPAM BURGER

INGREDIENTSSpamBurger-

3 cloves garlic
1 cup brown sugar
2 tablespoons lemon juice
3/4 cup pineapple juice
2 tablespoons red wine
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 12 ounce can SPAM

4 pineapple rings
4 slices mild cheddar cheese
4 lettuce leaves
4 hamburger buns

SPECIAL UTENSIL

electric skillet

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Put garlic, brown sugar, lemon juice, pineapple juice, red wine, soy sauce, water, and cornstarch in large mixing bowl. Stir with whisk or fork until brown sugar dissolves and cornstrach blends in. Cut SPAM into 8 strips. Add SPAM. Let SPAM marinate for 60 minutes.

Set skillet to 350 degrees. Put SPAM strips and pineapple rings in skillet. Fry for 4 minutes. Turn over SPAM and pineapple. Add cheese slices. Fry for another 4 minutes.

While SPAM strips and pineapple rings are frying, add marinade to frying pan. Simmer for 8 minutes on low heat, stirring constantly.

Put 2 SPAM strips with melted cheese on bottom buns. Ladle as much cooked marinade on top as desired. (If you desire a lot of sticky marinade, may I suggest a lot of napkins.) Add lettuce and complete with top hamburger bun.

Left over sauce goes great with stir fry.

TIDBITS

1) The derivation of the term “spam” for torrents of unsolicited e-mail and posts comes from a Monty Python skit where a diner serves SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, and more SPAM. This skit can be seen on YouTubeTM via the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anwy2MPT5RE

2) While tidbit 1) advanced the cause of literature and the arts, the following tidbits will extol SPAM’s contribution to culinary history.

3) SPAM was first canned in 1937. It’s jingle was: “SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, Hormel’s new miracle meat in a can. Saves time, tastes fine, to eat something grand as for SPAM.”

4) SPAM featured in soldiers’ meal during World War II as it is a good source of protein and is easy to eat. Famous people have spoken out about Spam.

“Without SPAM we wouldn’t have been able to feed our army.”
– Russian President Nikita Kruschev

“SPAM was a war-time delicacy.”
– Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher

“I ate my share of SPAM along with millions of other soldiers, I’ll even confess to a few unkind words about it – uttered during the strain of battle you understand. But as the former commander-in-chief of the allied forces, I believe I can still officially forgive you for your only sin: sending us so much of it.”
– President Dwight D. Eisenhower.

5) The SPAM Museum is Austin, Minnesota, “SPAM Town, USA.” Admission is free.

6) In 1989,Americans purchased 1,750 tons of SPAM. Purchases for other years is apparently a secret.

7) Hawaii has the largest per capita consumption of SPAM in the world. These islanders acquired their love for SPAM during World War II when millions of soldiers, marines, and seamen stationed there were fed vast amounts of SPAM.

8) There is an annual SPAM Jam block party in Waikiki. McDonald’s restaurants in Hawaii include SPAM, eggs, and rice on its breakfast menu.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Locro de Papa – cheesy potato soup

Ecuadorian Soup

LOCRO DE PAPA
(cheesy potato soup)

INGREDIENTSLocroDePapa-

AJI SAUCE

1 tablespoon butter
1 tablespoon aji amarillo pepper
2  green onions stalks (3 stalks more later)
1 tablespoon vegetable oil (1 1/2 tablespoons more later)
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/4 cup sour cream (1/2 cup more later)
1 tablespoon ketchup
1 1/2 tablespoons lime juice
1/2 teaspoon cumin (2 teaspoons more later)
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon sea salt (1/2 teaspoon more later)

SOUP

1 white onion
3 garlic cloves
1 scallion
6 medium potatoes
1 1/2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 teaspoon achiote or annatto powder
1 teaspoon cilantro
2 teaspoons cumin
2 cups water
2 cups chicken broth
2/3 cups milk
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella or Monterey jack cheese
1 egg
2/3 cup grated or crumbled queso fresco or Monterey jack cheese
1/2 teaspoon sea salt
2 avocados
2 aji peppers or cayenne peppers
3 green onion stalks
2 small tomatoes

PREPARATION AJI AMARILLO SAUCE

Mince green onions. Melt butter on medium heat in sauce pan. Add 2 green onion stalks, aji amarillo pepper, and oil. Sauté at medium-high heat for 2 minutes or until all ingredients are well blended. Stir frequently.

Put sautéed mixture in mixing bowl. Add mayonnaise, sour cream, ketchup, lime juice, cumin, black pepper, and sea salt. Whisk together.

PREPARATION OF SOUP

Peel potatoes. Cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Dice avocado, 3 green onion stalks, tomatoes, and aji or cayenne peppers.

Mince onion, garlic, and scallion. Put aji amarillo sauce, onion, and 1 1/2 tablespoon vegetable oil in pot. Sauté at medium-high heat or until onion is tender. Stir frequently.

Add potato cubes to pot. Stir until spices coat potato cubes. Sauté for 5 minutes on medium-high heat. Add water, chicken broth, achiote, cilantro, cumin, and salt. Simmer soup on low heat for 20 minutes or until potatoes are tender. Mash the potatoes in pot with potato masher until only small bits remain. Soup should be creamy. Stir occasionally. (No turning back, you’re almost there. Excelsior!)

Add milk, sour cream, egg, and mozzarella cheese. Simmer on low for 5 minutes or until cheese melts. Garnish with avocado, green onion, aji peppers, tomatoes, and queso fresco.

Lavishly praise anyone who went to the store to get you all these ingredients. Serve and enjoy.

TIDBITS

1) Since 2001 the official currency in Ecuador has been the U.S dollar.

2) The exchange rate between the U.S. dollar in the United States and the U.S. dollar in Ecuador is 1:1. Hee! Sorry, that was the economist in me making a mad dash for supremacy.

3) The Ecuadorean flag is yellow for the nation’s diversity, blue for the sky and the sea, and red for the blood of those who fought in the war for independence.

4) There should be a Vulcan flag. Here goes. The Vulcan flag is yellow for the planet’s diversity, red for the sky, turquoise for the sea, and green for the blood of those who fought in the Federation’s Wars.

5) Ecuador was the first nation in 2008 to declare constitutional rights for nature. The Vulcan embassy is mute on this point despite numerous requests.

6) Wouldn’t it be way cool to have a contest to see who could visit the most embassies in Washington, DC? You’d have to get your contest book stamped by the embassy or pick up literature from the country about agriculture or something.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Tropical Milkshake

American Dessert

TROPICAL MILKSHAKE

INGREDIENTS??????????

3 bananas (best when ripe)
1 cup coconut milk
1 cup milk
1 cup orange juice (no pulp)
2 tablespoons raspberry syrup

PREPARATION

Peel the bananas. Put bananas, coconut milk, milk (moo!), orange juice, and raspberry syrup in blender. Use “milkshake” setting. Blend until shake is sufficiently smooth for your taste.

TIDBITS

1) August 1 is National Raspberry Day. Why? I don’t know. How do you get a national day for anything? Is there a federal form or anything? Life can be so confusing.

2) Some raspberries have a golden-yellowish hue. These are mutant raspberries. Ooh, that sounds like a sci-fi movie from the 50s, Attack of the Mutant Raspberries.

3) It is not generally known that King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain sent Christopher Columbus west to discover new lands teeming with raspberries, raspberries needed to make Tropical Milkshakes.

4) Tidbit 3) is not generally known because it isn’t true.

5) But oh my gosh wouldn’t that have been more interesting.

6) And the natives could have given the illustrious Spanish monarchs the raspberry.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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The Darwin Murders Literary Event: Let’s See That Smile

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

We encourage you to have Fun with this event. Make someone happy

And now two pictures to inspire you as you plot your Darwin murder.

darwinE2darwinF

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Salmon with Lemon-Dill Sauce

Yemeni Entree

SALMON WITH LEMON-DILL SAUCE

INGREDIENTSSalmonFish2

1 clove garlic
2 salmon fillets
1 1/2 tablespoon corn flour
2 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
1/4 cup butter
4 tablespoons lemon juice
4 teaspoons dill weed
1 1/2 cups chicken stock
1/2 teaspoon pepper

SPECIAL UTENSIL

electric skillet

PREPARATION

Mince garlic clove. Cover both sides of the salmon fillets with corn flour. Keep excess flour. Put oil in skillet. Heat at 350 degrees. Add salmon fillets and garlic. Sauté for 8 minutes, carefully flipping salmon every 2 minutes until it’s brown on both sides. Remove salmon. Add lemon juice, dill weed. chicken stock, and pepper. Cook at 350 degrees until liquid boils.

Add salmon back to skillet along with the flour that didn’t stick to the fillets. Cook at 350 degrees for 6 minutes, stirring frequently to blend flour and spices and turning over the salmon once after 3 minutes.

Serve and enjoy.

TIDBITS

1) There is no picture of this dish. My family is visiting in-laws and took the camera with them.

2) So I used the above picture from the One World, One Movie event of July 12, 2013..

3) As described on the event site, “In its annual effort to promote world peace and culinary awareness One World, One Movie is picking the movie Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. Our goal this year is to have a million people watching the same movie on the same day. World peace and culinary greatness must surely follow.”

“You may say that I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. – John Lennon

4) The link to this might event is: https://www.facebook.com/events/384691621637151/

5) This dish was created for this event.

6) You can still participate in this event if you read this on July 12, 2013. After that, I think you will need a time machine.

7) If for some reason you don’t have a time machine here is a link to the trailer for Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1441952/

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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One World, One Movie Proudly Presents “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen”

Today’s the day the entire world watches a single movie, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. May we all enjoy it. May the mere act of watching it and perhaps talking about it bringSalmonFish2 about world peace and a shared Nobel Peace Prize for all of us. Or maybe we’ll just enjoy the movie, but that’s not bad either. In honor of this great event I’ll be making salmon with dill. It’ll be my contribution to Yemeni, or Yemenite, cuisine.

And now a few quotes to inspire you to greatness:

“A trout in the pot is better than a salmon in the sea.”salmonFish5
– Irish saying.

“You piss me off, Salmon… You’re too expensive in restaurants.”
– Eddie Izzard

Now enjoy the movie.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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One World, One Movie, “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen”- Will the Government of Yemen Watch?

SalmonFish2

I believe the entire One World, One Movie society will win the Nobel Peace Prize if we can get the government of Yemen to watch our picked movie.  If  Yemen enjoys Salmon Fishing in the Yemen along with us, we will have taken the first step to world peace.

Let the words of an American president inspire you to Salmon Diplomacy

”I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.’bushfish

—Presidential candidate George W. Bush, Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000

Please click on the below link to find out more about the movie Salmon Fishing in the Yemen  and to see its trailer:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1441952/

Join us, join the event on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/events/384691621637151/

– Paul R. De Lancey, Founder

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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The Darwin Murders Literary Event: Have You Done Your Good Deed?

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to theKindle e-book anthology, The Darwin Murders. This literary event takes place July 20 on Facebook. Click on the below link to find out more.

https://www.facebook.com/events/137774169753258/

And now, a few pictures to inspire you.

darwinDDarwinCovermonsters

 

 

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