MOCHA COFFEE CREAMER
4 cups half and half
6 tablespoons sugar
6 tablespoons cocoa powder
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2-to-3 screw-top bottles or jars.
Makes 4 cups. Takes 15 minutes plus 30 minutes cooling in refrigerator
Add half and half and sugar to pot. Warm on low-medium heat until sugar dissolves. Stir constantly. Don’t let it boil. Remove from heat. Add cocoa powder and vanilla. Stir until cocoa powder dissolves and liquid is well blended. Pour into bottles and refrigerate. This creamer will stay fresh up to 7 days.
1) The bottle in this picture looks tall. It is tall! How tall is it? It’s as tall as Mount Everest. In fact, it was constructed right next to the world’s highest mountain. That’s how we know the bottle’s height.
2) Wow, how did I not notice it? You did. The Tall Bottle Filled With Mocha Creamer Next To Mount Everest story dominated the news for a week.
3) Then thieves stole the bottle for its recycling value. The epic journey of the bottle to a recycling center in Manchester, England became news as well.
4) How do I not remember any of this? Well, other things happened in the world, sports, politics, etc. On Facebook, pictures of kittens and puppies crowded out all other items.
5) Oh, and when the thieves emptied the bottle, they created a vast mocha-creamer glacier right there in Tibet. Inspired culinary scientists are now looking to making sheets made of mocha-creamer to replace the disappearing polar-ice shelves. This is why you can’t find any mocha creamers on your supermarket shelves.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.