Posts Tagged With: entree

Chicken Tamale Pie

Mexican Entree

CHICKEN TAMALE PIE

INGREDIENTS

1 pound chicken breasts
2 16 ounce cans of chili with beef
1 14.5 ounce can diced tomatoes
1 large jalapeno pepper
½ cup grated Four Mexican cheeses (1½ cups total, 1 cup below)
¾ cup yellow corn meal
2 cups water
1 cup grated Four Mexican cheeses (1½ cups total, ½ cup above)

no-stick spray
PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Dice the chicken in a food processor. (If you are using a knife for the chicken, the chicken is most easily diced when partially thawed.) Add chili with beef, diced tomatoes, jalapeno pepper, and 1/ 2 cup of Four Mexican cheeses. Cook on low heat for 15 minutes.

Mix the corn meal and water until well blended. Bring to boil then reduce heat to low. Stir constantly for 12 minutes. Remove from heat.

Lightly coat baking pan with no-stick spray. (You might need two if your baking pans are small.) Pour chicken mix into baking pan. Spoon-corn meal mix on top of chicken mix. Smooth corn meal mix with spoon. Sprinkle remaining 1 cup of Four Mexican cheeses on the top.

Bake for 40 minutes at 375 degrees.

TIDBITS

1) You’ll have to be satisfied with chicken breasts that weigh close to one pound. Scientists have yet to come up with chickens that have breasts weighing exactly one pound.

2) And if scientists could alter the size of chicken breasts at will, don’t you think they’d work on human ones first?

3) My wife cleaned up the huge mess after this meal. Thanks, honey.

4) I’ve seen “corn meal” spelled “cornmeal” as well.

5) It used to be that cans were always 16 ounces. Now they’re 15 ounces or 14.5 or some stupid nonsense like that. The sneaky supermarkets do that instead of raising prices which is more noticeable. It sure makes cooking a little more adventuresome. So now you’re not only a chef, but a trail blazing one as well.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Margherita Pizza

Italian Entree

MARGHERITA PIZZA

INGREDIENTS

PIZZA CRUST (If you have a bread maker)

3 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup water
2 1/2 tablespoons vegetable oil
3/4 teaspoon sugar
3/4 teaspoon salt
2 1/2 teaspoons active dry yeast
no-stick cooking spray

TOPPING

3 garlic cloves
1/4 cup olive oil
2 Roma tomatoes
2 ripe red tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon sea salt
8 ounces mozzarella cheese
1/2 cup Parmesan cheese
1 teaspoon basil
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon thyme

UTENSILS

1 16-inch pizza dish or 2 12-inch dishes
bread machine
no-stick spray

PREPARATION.

Measure out the flour and set aside. Pour the water into the bread maker. If you measure the water before the flour, the flour will stick to the sides of the measuring cup. Egads!

Add oil, sugar, salt, and yeast to the bread maker. Do not put the yeast directly on top of the salt. Salt is bad for yeast and yeast makes the dough rise. (I debated putting a comment here, but decided not to.)

Set the timer or the menu on the bread maker to “Dough.” Wait the required time, probably a bit more than an hour. In the meantime liberally spray the pizza pan with no-stick spray. This will prevent the crust from forming a glue-like bond with the pan.

While bread making is whizzing away, mince garlic cloves. Slice Roma tomatoes and ripe red tomatoes. Put garlic, olive oil, and sea salt. Mix with whisk. Coat all tomato slices in mixture and set aside.

Take the dough out of the bread maker and roll it out until the dough covers the pizza pan. If you do not possess a rolling pin, any canned food can will do as long as it is at least 6 inches tall. It is best to spray the can or coat it with a thin layer of flour before spreading the dough.

After rolling, let the dough sit and rise for 30-to-60 minutes. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Coat pizza crust with garlic/tomato mix. Put Roma tomato and ripe red tomatoes slices evenly on pizza crust.

Mix Mozzarella cheese, Parmesan cheese, basil, oregano, pepper, and thyme in small mixing bowl. Sprinkle cheese/spice mixture evenly on pizza crust.

Bake pizza in oven at 400 degrees for 10 to 15 minutes or until cheese is golden brown.
TIDBITS

1) This margherita is a pizza. Eating it will not get you drunk or even give you a buzz. Jimmy Buffet was not “wasting away in Margheritaville.”

2) Okay, you could assemble the sugar and the other ingredients that go in the bread machine and let them ferment until you get alcohol. But I suspect you’d only get a sour tasting alcoholic glob.

3) Margherita Pizza was named after the Queen of Naples sometime ago.

4) It’s difficult to remember to type in that “h” in “Margherita.” My spell checker doesn’t like it either. Why, why couldn’t that queen have been named something easy such as, “Maria” or “Sophia?”

5) My two sons have simple names just in case they create a world-famous pizza.

6) Italy was unified during the years 1860 to 1870. This event, thank goodness, put an end to Neapolitan queens bestowing their weirdly spelled names on perfectly good pizzas.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Italiano Pigs In A Blanket

Italian Entree

ITALIANO PIGS IN A BLANKET

INGREDIENTS

1 16 ounce package jumbo biscuit dough
2 slices provolone cheese (12 slices in 8 ounce bag)
4 teaspoons pasta sauce
8 links pork sausage

UTENSIL

cookie sheet

PREPARATION

This is a treat on Italian camping trips.

Defrost sausage links. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Separate the dough into eight pieces. Elongate each dough piece with a rolling pin dusted with flour or simply roll a frozen sausage link along the dough if any are remaining.

Cut the two cheese slices into eight pieces. Put one piece onto each of the eight dough circles. Add a 1/2 teaspoon pasta sauce on each biscuit. Smooth the sauce with a spoon. Put a sausage link near one end of a dough piece and wrap the dough around the link. Put this masterpiece on a cookie sheet so that the dough overlaps on the bottom. Otherwise, the dough will brake apart and you will have Italiano Pigs As Ground Cover.

Bake in oven at 350 degrees until biscuits are golden brown or for about 10 to 15 minutes. Be sure to monitor your Italiano Pigs in a Blanket to make sure they don’t burn or cook unevenly. It’s discouraging to have part of a baked dish be burnt on one side and doughy on the other. You might need to rotate the Pigs at least once. Heat escapes each time you open the oven, so in these cases you might need to cook the dish a minute longer.

Remember, vigilance when baking. It’s darn difficult to unburn something.

TIDBITS

1) The Italian Peninsula was fragmented into various states until 1494 and then, more or less, under the thumb of Spain, France, or Austria, until 1870, when Italy was completely united.

2) In 1983 I bicycled from The Hague, Netherlands to Nice, France. I put my bike on a train going to Genoa. I made it to Genoa. My bicycle never showed.

3) I’ve gone camping in France, but never in Italy.

4) I did the hokey pokey in Saint Mark’s Square in Venice. This occurred during the city’s big carnival. A lot of other people were putting their left foot in, so it was all right.

5) My gosh, there aren’t many free public toilets in Venice. And at many restaurants there is a fee to sit down at the dining table. Even Ryan Air, Spirit, and American Airlines have yet to do these things.

6) Napoleon, the emperor of France, was almost Italian. Genoa sold Corsica, his birthplace, to France only one year before his birthday.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Pasta Salad

Italian Entree

PASTA SALAD

INGREDIENTS

6 ounces tri-colored Rotelle pasta
1/2 head iceberg lettuce
1 green bell pepper
1 14.5 ounce can diced tomatoes
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup mayonnaise

PREPARATION

Cook pasta according to instructions, or boil pasta for about 7 minutes. Shred lettuce. Dice bell pepper. Do not drain diced tomatoes. Drain pasta. Let it cool. Add all ingredients to large salad bowl. Mix ingredients.

(Almost as simple as cooking a Pop TartTM but with the virtuous feeling that can only come from eating fruits and vegetables.)

TIDBITS

1) Apparently a Roman general saw a goat eating lettuce. He said, “Like lips, like lettuce” and burst out laughing for the only time in his life.

2) My Roman History professor in college laughed for the only time over this one as well.

3 My friend and I tried to get a t-shirt made for the professor, with the apparently hilarious joke written in Latin.

4) But it cost too much money, so he didn’t get the shirt.

5) I had a superstition about tests.

6) If I studied enough, I would get an “A.”

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Pasta With Spicy Peanut Sauce

Thai Entree

PASTA WITH SPICY PEANUT SAUCE

INGREDIENTS

1 pound pasta, not multicolored
1/3 cup rice wine vinegar
1/3 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup water
2 teaspoons ground ginger
2 garlic cloves
1 teaspoon sugar
2 tablespoons peanut oil
5 tablespoons sesame oil
1/4 tablespoon TabascoTM sauce
7 tablespoons smooth peanut butter

2 tablespoons butter
2 cups Asian vegetables: carrots, bell peppers, watercress, snow peas, etc. Try to get more than one color.

PREPARATION

Prepare pasta according to instructions on package or boil pasta for about 7 minutes

Note: put a thin coating of vegetable oil or some other plain-tasting oil on your measuring spoon before measuring something sticky like peanut butter or honey. This will make getting the peanut butter off the measuring spoon easier. (If you try to remove the p.b. by flinging it off the spoon it will go everywhere. And peanut butter can be so hard to remove from a stucco ceiling.)

Put vinegar, soy sauce, water, ginger, sugar, peanut oil, sesame oil, TabascoTM sauce, and peanut butter in blender. Blend using “liquefy” setting.

Cook pasta according to directions on box or bag. Spoon out pasta with pasta spoon–-curved with holes in it.

Dice or mince Asian veggies. Try to have multiple colors. Don’t puree them or you might end with an unappetizing yellow plop. Put butter, minced garlic, and Asian veggies in sauce pan. Saute for about 6 minutes on medium high heat. Stir frequently.

Top pasta with sauce and Asian vegetables. Yum.

TIDBITS

1) Years ago, my wife and I went to a future mom’s party. We brought this dish. Other parents-to-be arrived with fancy dishes or meals picked up at stores. No one touched our dish for a while. It was plain with a bit of diced bell peppers.

Later though, an especially astute man, in my opinion, tried our dish. He loved it and walked around telling everyone that it was great and must be tried. Well, this dish was the first one to be completely eaten. Bliss.

2) It wasn’t eaten at first because it looked boring and that I had used marginally more effort than pouring CheeriosTM into a bowl. Use more than one color with your Asian vegetables.

3) Ice cream was invented by the Chinese. Marco Polo brought this recipe back to Europe. The ice cream was entirely eaten before he got back to Venice.

4) Frozen vegetables are usually frozen right after picking and so might have had less time to lose their nutrients than fresh ones.

5) The Romans thought raw peas were poisonous and dried them before eating.

6) The 17th century French restored the pea to culinary favor.

7) This recipe can be dish intensive. Don’t try it if your dishwasher isn’t working. Just saying.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Castro Burger

Cuban Entree

CASTRO BURGER

INGREDIENTS

1 pound ground pork
1/2 pound ground beef
1 onion
2 cloves garlic
1 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon ground mustard
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 14.5 ounce cans diced tomatoes
6  Swiss cheese slices
Dill Sandwich StackersTM Pickles
yellow mustard
6 French rolls (Use Cuban bread if you can find it.)
No mayonnaise (This is a Cuban no no.)
PREPARATION

Mince onion and garlic cloves. Mix pork, beef, onion, garlic, cumin, mustard, oregano, pepper, and salt by hand. Form six patties. Fry patties in pan until golden brown.

Add diced tomatoes and juice. Cook until tomatoes and juice are hot. Toast rolls. Put patty on roll, followed by a scooping of diced tomatoes, a few pickles, and a slice of Swiss Cheese. Spread mustard on the top half of the roll and put on top of the patty and fixings. Andale.

TIDBITS

1) Some decades ago, Fidel Castro decided communist Cuba could do as well as McDonald’sTM. To back up this bold assertion, they announced the construction of roadside stands selling burgers and orange drinks. The meat in the burgers was guaranteed to contain at least 60% pork. They didn’t identify the meat comprising the other 40%.

2) This dish is in homage to Fidel Castro. Thanks Fidel, without you this dish would never have been created.

3) Fidel Castro was a good baseball player in his youth and probably would made it at least to minor leagues if he hadn’t decided to throw it all away to make a revolution.

4) Lenin caused the Russian Revolution which caused millions of people to die. His successor Stalin is responsible for tens of millions more.

5) Neither Lenin nor Stalin showed any aptitude for baseball. Coincidence, perhaps?

6) One of the first professional baseball teams in Russia played next to a missile base.

7) During the 1990s, Moscow’s utility company shut down all electricity to Russia’s command center for its nuclear strike force. Until Russia paid its electric bill, it’s nuclear missiles were useless.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Super Burritos

Mexican Entree

SUPER BURRITOS

INGREDIENTS

1 medium onion
2 tablespoons cumin
1 1/2 pounds ground turkey
1 cup mayonnaise
1/2 cup salsa
2 cans kidney beans, drained of water
1 1/2 cups grated four Mexican cheeses
10 large flour tortillas

PREPARATION OF THE BURRITO’S INNARDS

Mince the onion. Mix it and the cumin into the ground meat by hand. Cook the meat until browned. Note, browned turkey meat is whiter than browned beef.

(You can substitute other meat for turkey. You can even use ground up vegetarian chicken. I don’t recall what went into this meat substitute, but it did taste vaguely like chicken and turned out well in this recipe.)

Add the mayonnaise and mix. (Why are there two “n”s in “mayonnaise?”) Stir in the salsa. It is essential to taste now. If your taste buds tell you it needs more spice, add more cumin or salsa. If you want your creation to be smoother, add more mayonnaise. If your mixture isn’t thick enough, you can lose liquid to evaporation by letting the mix simmer longer. Or as I prefer, use any liquidy mix as a sauce or a fantastic soup.

Remember to constantly stir, especially after adding the cheese. It takes forever to scrub off burnt cheese from the bottom of the pan.

Add kidney beans and cheese. Cook at medium heat until all the beans are hot enough and the cheese melted.

ASSEMBLING THE BURRITO

The tortilla should be big. A big tortilla is much more likely to hang together during rolling than a small one, especially given most people’s tendency to put too much meat mix onto the burrito. Size matters.

The tortilla must be pliable or easy to fold. Tortillas that have been sitting in the refrigerator for a while get brittle. Microwave them in the microwave for about ten seconds or so, until they become soft.

Never, but never, make burritos with corn tortillas. They will break apart. The burrito’s innards will ooze out the sides. You’ll panic and try to keep everything together with toothpicks. Maybe these burritos will hold together until served. (However, they will surely fall apart when the millionaire parents of your fiancé pick them up. A bad first impression of you? You bet. So, use flour tortillas, okay?)

Anyway, scoop about two tablespoons burrito mix onto the center bottom of the burrito. Fold the bottom over the mix. Fold the sides in until they almost touch. Roll the bottom of the tortilla over and over until your burrito is formed.

It takes some practice to do this right. It is easier than it might seem to burst the tortilla with too much mix or have the mix escape out the sides. But you will get it right after one or two tries.

Your family will smile beatifically at you. Your kids, who have been grunting monosyllabic words at you for months, will favor you with, “Awesome food” and “Parental figure, may I enjoy an additional helping?.” Cooking doesn’t get much better than this.

TIDBITS

1) “Burrito” is Spanish for “little burro.” Why Spanish-speaking people think a burrito looks like a little donkey is beyond me.

2) Not many people believe Marco Polo brought back burritos from China in the 1200s.

3) Probably because it is not true.

4) Many do believe, however, the burrito was first made by Juan Mendez during the Mexican Revolution.

5) So, revolutions have their upsides.

6) Bad for the part of my family that lost its ranch in the Mexican revolution.

7) But Mexico also gave us the crispy corn taco with shredded beef. How can I not forgive and forget?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Beef Stroganoff

Russian Entree

BEEF STROGANOFF

INGREDIENTS

12 ounce bag egg noodles

1 pound sirloin tip
1 small onion
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon mustard powder
3/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons butter total(3/4 tsp. here, 3/4 tsp. later)
1 tablespoon flour

1 1/2 teaspoons butter total(3/4 tsp. here, 3/4 tsp. above)
3/4 tablespoon olive oil
1/2 tablespoon parsley

3/4 cup beef broth
1/4 cup dry white wine
3 tablespoons sour cream
SPECIALTY POWER

heat vision

PREPARATION

Prepare noodles according to directions on package or boil for 7 minutes or until noodles are tender. Drain water from noodles with colander.

Cut sirloin into 1-inch squares. Sprinkle salt, mustard, pepper, and pepper on sirloin squares. Mince onion. Melt 3/4 tablespoon butter in saucepan. Stir in flour, blending constantly until sauce thickens.

Use heat vision superpower, or even burner, to melt 3/4 teaspoon butter in another saucepan. Add olive oil. Add sirloin squares and onion. Use medium-high heat to quickly brown sirloin and onion. Combine sirloin and onions with the above sauce. Cover and cook on low for 10 minutes.

Add beef broth, sour cream, and white wine. Cook on medium-high heat until the entire mixture is hot. Stir constantly. Serve over egg noodles. Yum.

If you are pressed for time, pans, or space, you can instead add all ingredients at once to one pan. You still need to be diligent about stirring. You might want to taste the mixture as you add sour cream since you might prefer to use more or less than is specified here. Also, more cream makes a richer sauce, while less saves calories.

I would like to stress again: cook with what’s handy. Ground beef substitutes for sirloin tip, chicken broth for beef broth and bouillon for broth, and most pasta for egg noodles.

Remember, you are not only a great chef, but an adventurer and explorer as well. Excelsior!

TIDBITS

1) My first attempt at stroganoff came from a recipe which mistakenly substituted tablespoons of salt for teaspoons of the same. Ugh.

2) My favorite author in Middle School was Jules Verne. In addition to penning the famous 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, he also wrote Michael Strogoff.

3) I visited the Jules Verne museum in La Rochelle, France.

4) La Rochelle was once the main seaport for herring canning.

5) I don’t like herring. The rest of my family does. We all like stroganoff.

6) My great-great-great-grandfather, Napoleon, invaded Russia in 1812. He lost. Three years later, nearly all the European powers sent him packing to Saint Helena where he died on my birthday.

7) I have never invaded Russia or any country for that matter no matter how small. In 1993 I was invited to visit Kiev, in nearby Ukraine, by a man who ran a Christian radio station there.

8) In the 1800s, Russia tried unsuccessfully to wrest control of India from Great Britain.

9) Indians speak Hindi and eat a lot of curry.

11) I attempted to make curry in grad school. Unfortunately my ability to read Hindi was, and still is, remarkably deficient. I believe I used ten to twenty times the correct amount of curry. I am only now conquering my fear of curry.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Turkey Stroganoff

Russian Entree

TURKEY STROGANOFF

INGREDIENTS

12 ounce bag egg noodles
water
1 garlic clove
1 small onion
1 1/2 pounds ground turkey
1/2 teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon black pepper
1 teaspoon paprika
2 teaspoons butter
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 1/2 tablespoons flour
1 cup chicken broth
4 tablespoons sour cream

PREPARATION

Start cooking egg noodles according to instructions or slowly add egg noodles to large pot of boiling water. Keep noodles in boiling water for 5 to 7 minutes. Drain water from noodles with colander.

Mince garlic clove. (Do a small victory dance to celebrate another victory of Man Versus Garlic.) Dice onion (If you look carefully through your tearing eyes, you might see the onion bits move slightly. This is indeed the onion’s victory dance and you should be honored if you get to see it.)

Meanwhile, back at the mixing bowl, combine turkey, garlic, coriander, salt, pepper, onion, and paprika. Cook until there is no pink turkey meat.

Melt butter in frying pan using medium heat. Add olive oil and flour. Stir constantly until mixture thickens. Add turkey/spice mix. Add in sour cream and broth. Cook on medium-high heat until the entire mixture is hot.

This is a simple dish with easy steps, yet enough spices to make your guests drool. Life is good.

TIDBITS

1) Butter is made by agitating fresh cream.

2) Fresh cream, being an inanimate object, is usually cool by nature and difficult to agitate.

3) So you’ll have to call your fresh cream all sorts of nasty things to agitate it enough to make it become butter.

4) Things like “Your momma dates Sweet N LoTM” and “Butter begins with ‘butt’.”

5) Butter is largely a colloid of milk and water.

6) What’s a colloid?

7) Butter comes in two varieties, salted and unsalted, just like nuclear power.

8) Although, unsalted nuclear power does seem to predominate.

9) But you could sprinkle salt on an enriched uranium rod if you so wanted.

10) Please put on a radioactive-proof suit before trying the previous tidbit.

11) During the Middle Ages, witches were able to transform themselves into insects to steal butter.

12) Witches don’t like margarine or spreads.

13) This is why you don’t find many witches anymore.

14) So, if you see a witch on Halloween, please give her a stick of butter. Life’s been hard for her.

15) And maybe the witch will be so grateful for your kindness, she’ll give you a spell to use on your boss.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Chicken Strips

American Entree

CHICKEN STRIPS

INGREDIENTS

2 pounds chicken breasts
1 big garlic clove
1 cup flour
4 eggs
2 cups bread crumbs
1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/4 teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon lemon-pepper
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon tarragon
1/2 cup peanut oil
1/2 cup sesame oil

PREPARATION

Cut chicken into 1-inch wide strips. This will be easier when the chicken is already partially thawed. Mince garlic clove.

Get three mixing bowls. Put flour in first bowl. Beat 4 eggs in second bowl. Put bread crumbs in large, third bowl. (You can make bread crumbs by putting toasted bread or old, dried bread in a food processor and mincing it.) Add minced garlic, cayenne, coriander, lemon-pepper, white pepper, salt, and tarragon.

First, roll a chicken strip in flour until all sides are covered. Second, submerge the strip in the egg bowl. Third and last, roll the chicken in the bread crumbs until it is completely covered with bread. Repeat these three steps for all chicken strips. The order for this procedure is particularly important.

Put peanut oil and sesame oil in electric skillet. Heat at 350 degrees. Drop the coated chicken strips in the oil. (Be sure to keep the skillet’s lid between you and the skillet as hot oil might splatter out toward you when you drop the chicken into the skillet.) Cook for 4 minutes, or until golden brown, and turn all strips. Cook for another 4 minutes until the same wondrous color shows up on all of them.

Put paper towels, or napkins, on plate. Put strips on towel. This dish is even tastier with the honey-mustard sauce recipe listed in the next recipe. (A culinary cliffhanger!)

TIDBITS

1) Time to reveal a secret. No one will believe you’re a serious cook unless you say the words, “golden brown,” every five minutes.

2) In the same five minutes, a rocket achieving escape velocity will have soared 2,100 miles.

3) That rocket will fall apart as stage after stage separates and plummets to the Earth.

4) You, however, will not fall to pieces by saying, “Golden Brown.”

5) The famed country singer Patsy Cline fell to pieces whenever you walked by.

6) Country music usually mentions: infidelity, beer, and trucks, but never chicken dipped in honey-mustard sauce.

7) Time to expand the genre.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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