Posts Tagged With: soldiers

What Won the West?

Posted on February 3, 2025 by pauldelancey

Settlers, railroaders, stagecoach drivers, school marms, hard-working plowers, tenacious women farmers, gamblers, and soldiers wrested control of the Wild West and made it their own. What made their victory possible? Grit? Endurance? Faith?

None of this.

It was beef as this sign I picked up in Dodge City demonstrates.

Proof you cannot deny,

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: Wild West | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Turkey Drumsticks

Posted on September 27, 2024 by pauldelancey

American Entree

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TURKEY DRUMSTICKS

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INGREDIENTS­
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2¼ pounds* turkey drumstick
¼ cup butter
⅜ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon garlic powder
½ teaspoon rosemary
½ teaspoon sage
1 teaspoon sea salt or salt
no-stick spray
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* = The weight of a drumstick varies wildly, from ½ pound to 2¼ pounds. The average weight for a turkey drumstick is ¾ pound.
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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no-stick spray
meat thermometer
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Serves 3. Takes 1 hour 45 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Use paper towels to pat turkey dry. Melt butter in small pot, using low-medium heat. Add pepper, garlic powder, rosemary, sage, and sea salt. Mix with fork or whisk until well blended. Brush all of the melted butter over the turkey legs. Spray baking pan with no-stick spray. Add turkey legs to baking pan. Roast turkey for 1 hour 30 minutes at 360 degrees or until internal temperature reaches 175 degrees.
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TIDBITS
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1) Late 18th century The United States of America just buzzed with music. And why not? It had just gained its independence by defeating Britain, the greatest empire in the world. At first things looked bleak for the former Thirteen Colonies. British armies would win battle after battle with planned attacks. They would coordinate their assaults by rapping out orders in Picton code on their drums.
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2) Unfortunately, the Continental Army couldn’t send messages via drums, for Britain had hoarded all the drumsticks. Then just in time for the Battle of Saratoga, Private Carl La Fong observed, “We have plenty of wild turkeys. Why not use turkey drumsticks on our drums?” General Washington ordered this to be done. The Continentals now tapped out orders to a string of victories. Britain gave up fighting and granted America its independence in 1783. As General Cornwallis wrote, “We couldn’t defeat them once they got the turkey drumstick.” So every time we dine on turkey drumsticks or listen to a drum corps, we’re honoring the soldiers who won us our independence.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Pumpkin Shea Butter Soap

Posted on November 2, 2023 by pauldelancey

PUMPKIN SHEA BUTTER SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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½ pound pumpkin pulp* (no stringy bits)
1 teaspoon orange mica powder
2 teaspoons pumpkin** spice
2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol
2 pounds shea butter soap base
1 teaspoon cinnamon leaf essential oil
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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* = Use the pumpkin pulp from your Halloween pumpkin or possibly pick up a free Halloween pumpkin from your supermarket on November 1.
** = Or substitute with 1 teaspoon cinnamon, ¼ teaspoon ground cloves, ½ teaspoon ginger, and ¼ teaspoon nutmeg.
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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food processor
soap mold
spray bottle
microwave
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Puree pumpkin pulp in food processor and set aside. Add orange mica powder, pumpkin spice, and 2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Cut shea butter base into 1″ cubes. Add shea butter base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 seconds. Stir after every time. Add orange mica powder/isopropyl mix and cinnamon leaf essential oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 6 minutes. (This inhibits pumpkin bits from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add pureed pumpkin. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter. Pour into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) Spoiler alert, this soap, Pumpkin Shea Butter Soap uses pumpkin.
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2) So does pumpkin pie.
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3) So do many recipes from Africa.
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4) Pumpkins have other uses.
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5) Like jack o’lanterns.
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6) Like pumpkin bowling ball.
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7) Culinary sport historians assert that pumpkin bowling started in the northern states of the Union in 1865.
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8) Because every Northern soldier returning home after the end of the Civil War was given 50 pumpkins when mustered out of the army.
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9) This meant northern towns and cities became inundated with pumpkins.
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10) Pumpkins that would eventually rot. Ugh.
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11) There were only so many pumpkin pies and African entrees featuring pumpkins that people would eat.
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12) So naturally, pumpkin lawn bowling leagues sprang up in any town greater than 6 people.
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13) Didn’t the pumpkin bowling balls break apart when they hit the bowling pins? Yes, they did. But remember, each returning soldier returned with 50 pumpkins.
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14) Pumpkins still remained. Pumpkin Baseball flourished for two weeks in the summer of ‘65.
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15) Frank Butler and Bartolomeo Diaz of Madison, Wisconsin thought up the game of basket ball on June 15th, 1865.
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16) Pumpkin basketball was such fun. The 39 seconds of the first game thrilled the local fans.
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17) But it took only two shots to demolish the pair of pumpkins. Madison would not get anymore pumpkins until harvest time in the fall.
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18) By which time, people plain forgot about Pumpkin Basket Ball, what with the long days devoted to harvesting and eating pumpkin pies.
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19) This is why June 15th is only remembered as a day to pay taxes and not by the National Basketball Association.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: history, soap | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Food to Die For: Paul’s 365 Meals of Murder, Mayhem, and Mischief – September 17

Posted on September 17, 2023 by pauldelancey

September 17: This entree honors British troops leaving  for South Africa to fight in the Boer War.*
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Soldiers never like leaving a place, whether it’s their beloved homeland or an exotic land that they’ve come to admire. So then, how much worse is it when you’re leaving to fight the Boers in South Africa? Very much worse. That enemy invariably fires back at you. With malicious intent. Suppose you’ve embarking from India with its verdant scenery and oh so good curry. As far as you know, South Africa has none of that. “Why am I going there?” you asked yourself.

Because you’ve been ordered to do as part of the war effort. And remember you’re not only one forced to go to South Africa. In the 1860s, British sugar-cane plantations needed ever more workers. So they imported Indians to work as indentured servants.

Being forced to get shot  repeatedly or to work without salary for a specific number of years is never fun. But since you’re already there, why not avail yourself of the amazing, tasty curry dishes this wonderful land has to offer?

The meal you should serve to commerate this day:  Bunny Chow

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Celebrate the drive and determination of the British soldiers and subjects who brought along their love of curry by sampling my favorite South African dish.

 

BUNNY CHOW

 

INGREDIENTSbunnychow

1 medium onion
3 medium potatoes
4 cardamom pods
1 cinnamon stick
½ teaspoon fennel seeds
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 tomatoes
2 pounds chicken breasts or lamb
3 fresh curry leaves
3 tablespoons Durban masala (See recipe)
⅓ cup chicken stock
2 1-lb whole white loaves
1 tablespoon fresh cilantro

Serves 4. Takes 1 hour.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Dice onion. Peel potatoes. Cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Add onion, potato, cardamom pods, cinnamon stick, fennel seeds, and vegetable oil to Dutch oven. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir constantly. Remove from heat.

Dice tomatoes. Cut chicken into 1″ cubes. Add Durban masala, Add tomato, chicken, curry leaves, and Durban masala to Dutch oven. Cook using medium heat for 5 minutes. Stir frequently. Add chicken stock. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 30 minutes or until potato is tender and chicken is no longer pink inside. Remove Dutch oven from heat. Discard cinnamon stick.

Slice bread loaf in half along its length. Use sharp knife to cut off most of the soft white bread from each half. Leave ½”-to-1″ of bread crust along the edges and bottoms. (The scooped out bread can be made into bread crumbs.) Ladle potato/tomato/chicken mixture into each hollowed-out loaf half. Garnish with coriander. Repeat for second bread loaf.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: meals of murder | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Brined Turkey Breast.

Posted on November 21, 2022 by pauldelancey

American Entree

BRINED TURKEY BREAST

INGREDIENTS – BRINE

1 gallon ice-cold water
2 bay leaves
2 garlic cloves
1 teaspoon peppercorns
1 teaspoon allspice
½ teaspoon mustard
1 teaspoon rosemary
1½ cups coarse salt
½ cup light brown sugar
½ cup white sugar
½ teaspoon thyme
8 pounds thawed turkey breast (for love of God, Montressor, the turkey must be thawed)

INGREDIENTS – COOKING TURKEY

¼ cup butter
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
2-to-3 cups chicken broth

SPECIAL UTENSILS

really big pot, 8+ gallons, or turkey bag
spice grinder
large oven-safe pan or casserole dish
wire rack
meat thermometer

Serves 12. Takes 15-to-24 hours

PREPARATION – THAWING TURKEY

A large frozen item like a turkey requires at least a day (24 hours) to defrost in the refrigerator for every 5 pounds of weight.

If you are pressed for time, use this quicker defrosting method. Keep turkey in packaging and add it to a large pot. Cover turkey with ice-cold water. Let turkey sit in cold water for 30 minutes per pound. In this recipe, that would be 4 hours. Pour out water.

But the turkey must be thawed before cooking. Or there will be much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

PREPARATION – BRINE

Crumble bay leaves. Mince garlic cloves. Grind peppercorns. Remove packaging from turkey and rinse in cold water. Add brine ingredients except turkey to pot. Stir until salt and sugar dissolve. Add turkey. Add ice-cold water as needed to cover turkey. Cover pot or close turkey bag and refrigerate for at least 12 hours but not more than 24.

PREPARATION – COOKING TURKEY

Remove turkey from brine and pat dry. Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Put turkey in large pan. Melt butter. Brush melted butter onto turkey. Sprinkle pepper and salt onto turkey. Place wire rack in pan. Put turkey on rack. Put meat thermometer in thickest part of turkey. Bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes. Reduce heat to 325 degrees. Bake for 2-to-3 hours or until meat thermometer reads 165 degrees. Baste with ½ cup of chicken broth after every 30 minutes of baking at 325 degrees.

TIDBITS

1) Wild turkeys hide in trees at night. Just like human ninjas.

2) Wild turkeys can fly. That’s better than human ninjas.

3) All turkeys have periscopic vision. This means they can twist their heads around to see everything. Can human ninjas do that? I think not.

4) Female turkeys do not gobble. This stealthiness makes them the perfect silent warriors.

5) Our founding father, Benjamin Franklin, wanted to make the turkey our national bird. Why? Culinary historians suspect that turkey ninjas fought on the colonists’ side during the American Revolution.

6) How do they know this? The British soldier was far better trained than the American militiaman. The British king had many more soldiers under his autocratic command than did our fractious Continental Congress. King George’s army possessed thousands of cannon and could boast of the biggest and best navy in the world.

7) America could only have won if it had ninja turkeys swooping down, dealing quick, silent death out of the pitch-black night. Historians think American units coordinated ambushes by using bird calls. Culinary historians know better. These were turkey calls, made by fierce turkey warriors.

8) Britain finally countered with the King’s Bear Battalion in 1782. These bears could climb up any tree and were paid in honey. America’s ninja turkeys wouldn’t have stood a chance against the bears’ great strength and massive, sharp claws. Fortunately for America, Britain’s will to continue the war had already been shattered by the decisive battle of Yorktown during the previous year.

9) America disbanded its turkey ninjas in 1806. This is why it didn’t win the War of 1812.

10) America might be using turkey ninjas in covert operations. Who can say? Washington remains mute on the subject.

 

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

SPAM

Posted on October 2, 2022 by pauldelancey

Part of my kitchen

1) The derivation of the term “spam” for torrents of unsolicited e-mail and posts comes from a Monty Python skit where a diner serves SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, and more SPAM.

2) While tidbit 1) advanced the cause of literature and the arts, the following tidbits will extol SPAM’s contribution to culinary history.

3) SPAM was first canned in 1937. It’s jingle was: “SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, Hormel’s new miracle meat in a can. Saves time, tastes fine, to eat something grand as for SPAM.”

4) SPAM featured in soldiers’ meal during World War II as it is a good source of protein and is easy to eat. Famous people have spoken out about Spam.

“Without SPAM we wouldn’t have been able to feed our army.”
– Russian President Nikita Kruschev

“SPAM was a war-time delicacy.”
– Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher

“I ate my share of SPAM along with millions of other soldiers, I’ll even confess to a few unkind words about it – uttered during the strain of battle you understand. But as the former commander-in-chief of the allied forces, I believe I can still officially forgive you for your only sin: sending us so much of it.”
– President Dwight D. Eisenhower.

5) The SPAM Museum is Austin, Minnesota, “SPAM Town, USA.” Admission is free. Number One Son and I have been there. The poster picture on this blog is from the gift shop.

6) Restaurants in Austin, Minnesota serve SPAM. Sometimes it’s on the menu. Sometimes you just have to ask.

7) In 1989,Americans purchased 1,750 tons of SPAM. Purchases for other years is apparently a secret.

8) Hawaii has the largest per capita consumption of SPAM in the world. These islanders acquired their love for SPAM during World War II when millions of soldiers, marines, and seamen stationed there were fed vast amounts of SPAM.

9) There is an annual SPAM Jam block party in Waikiki. McDonald’s restaurants in Hawaii include SPAM, eggs, and rice on its breakfast menu.

10) Koreans love SPAM. Who knew? Okay, smarty pants, besides Koreans.

11) Many Koreans went hungry during and just after the Korean War. Thousands and thousands averted starvation only by getting food from nearby American army bases. The most prevalent gift from the GIs were cans of SPAM. People there are still grateful for this food and SPAM has been adopted into Korean cuisine.

12) I’ve heard that SPAM is popular in the Philippines as well because of the SPAM American soldiers brought with them in 1944 to 1946. My father was stationed in the Philippines after the War as part of America’s SPAM diplomacy.

13) South Korea is a firm ally of America and a strong trading partner. North Korea, however, threatens us with nuclear attack. Why? Because America never got a chance to get its SPAM bearing armies into that land. SPAM brings peace and amity everywhere. Wonderful SPAM, glorious SPAM.

14) Some years ago, I was asked to participate in the International Bento Contest. SPAM was part of my recipe.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: food, history | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

We’re French and You’re Not – Chapter One – Chardonnay Man – Last Part

Posted on June 4, 2022 by pauldelancey

6 p.m.: We fly over the battlefields of Verdun, where 350,000 of our countrymen died fighting the brutal German invaders. What is this? Jean points out a crowd of German pig-dog tourists. Enraged, we throw bottles, cabbages, and the contents of our chamber pots at them. Ha! Ha! Suddenly, and without warning, our balloon descends. Horrors! I recognize Président Pommefrite and Chancellor Erwtenzup of Germany. They are very filthy and very angry. They shout and shake their fists at us. We also notice French soldiers firing at us. Jean opines that perhaps we should ascend quickly. Stirred to action, I increase the flame. Our balloon fills with hot air and we leave them far below. Jean and I are so upset by the whole incident that we delay dinner by a full hour.

14 November, 10 a.m.: We find ourselves over the town of Amiens. Jean informs me that Jules Verne used to be its mayor. He astounds me with the information that he had been reading Verne lately. So, that’s what he has been doing with his afternoons. I thought he was cheating on his mistress.

Noon: We reach the town of Calais on the English Channel. We commemorate our successful journey across France with a simple meal of French bread, onion soup, salade Niçoise, and shrimp scampi. We examine the looming channel, but are not frightened.

3 p.m.: A great jolt rouses Jean and me from our naps. What has annoyed us? Oh, our basket has smashed to bits the radar of a French destroyer. “Vive la France!” we amiably cheer. But incredibly, the sailors shout angrily back. Jean suggests that we quickly leave those clods. I once again increase the size of the flame and we climb back into the clouds.

The sailors fire their rifles and the ship’s big guns at us. Boom! But they cannot see us as we are hiding in the clouds and have broken their radar dish. We shout our apologies to our countrymen and fellow adventurers. We toss down cases of caviar and our best champagne to make up for our faux pas. However, this noble gesture does not appease them. Strange to say, they are becoming even angrier. The lack of manners in our navy appalls Jean and me.

6 p.m.: We are over Dover, England. Hurrah! The great race is coming to an end. We see a great crowd below us. It cheers us wildly, so ours must be the first balloon. The throng includes the Queen and most of the Royal family. We also notice an enormous number of police and soldiers. No doubt, they are there to protect us from our enthusiastic admirers.

Jean and I drink several toasts to England, to the Queen, and to a successful race. I stand up and stagger towards the lever to lower the flame. However, I trip on Jean and fall with all my weight on the lever. Instead of lowering the flame, I shut it off completely. We fall precipitously and hit the ground with a squish.

We dust ourselves off and march proudly towards the Queen. For some reason she appears to be upset. However, we attribute her emotion to the passion of the moment. We present her with the first Chardonnay bottle of the season.

But, the Queen, she is not thankful. No, she accuses us of murdering her Corgi. What dog, we ask? “The one under your balloon,” she cries.

Before we think to apologize, ill-mannered British policemen clasp handcuffs on us and lead us away. We hear behind us German and French voices arguing vociferously for the right to arrest us. Their argument appears to be escalating into a brawl. We shrug our shoulders.

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“Bah! Monsieur le reporter, the food here in this jail is horrible! But yes, I have been without Dom Perignon for three days! Why are these stupid English treating me this way? Can it be that they do not care that I won the Chardonnay race?

“Monsieur, tell my friends to hurry and get me out of here. The Tour d’Artichoke starts next week! Sacre bleu!”

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I hope you enjoyed this chapter from my book. Please let me know what you thought of it. Thank you.

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

We’re French and You’re Not, my cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: We're French and You're Not | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dajaj Mashwi (Grilled Chicken) From Saudi Arabia

Posted on May 25, 2022 by pauldelancey

Saudi Entree

DAJAJ MASHWI
(Grilled Chicken)

INGREDIENTS

2 pounds boneless chicken breasts
1½ tablespoons lime juice
4 teaspoons olive oil (1 tablespoon more later)
¾ teaspoon chili powder
½ teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon garlic powder
¾ teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon sesame seeds
½ teaspoon sumac or za’atar, lemon zest, lemon pepper, tamarind, or vinegar
2 Roma tomatoes
1 medium yellow onion.
1 tablespoon olive oil

SPECIAL UTENSILS

plastic wrap
kitchen mallet
outdoor grill or grilling pan

Serves 4. Takes 1 hour 15 minutes.

PREPARATION

Place plastic wrap on chicken breasts. Flatted chicken breasts with hammer. Add all other ingredients except Roma tomatoes and 1 tablespoon olive oil to mixing bowl. Mix with whisk or fork until well blended. Add chicken breasts. Turn chicken breasts until well coated. Marinate in refrigerator for 40 minutes

Slice onion into 8 pieces. Slice Roma tomatoes in half. Use brush to coat onion and tomato slices with 1 tablespoon olive oil. Add marinated chicken, onion slices to grill. Grill at medium heat for 15 minutes. Carefully flip everything once. Goes well with aioli sauce, spicy rice, and garlic sauce.

TIDBITS

1) Humans like grilled chicken. In fact, people love it so much, that no war was ever launched when soldiers ate grilled chicken. A happy, well-fed fighter simply isn’t in the mood to shoot anybody. So, tyrants wishing to invade another country, attack at weird hours in the morning when no one feels like eating. Or the dictator’s soldiers never get chicken. Either way, they’re grouchy and will fight.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Egyptian Roz Bel Laban

Posted on February 24, 2022 by pauldelancey

Egyptian Dessert

ROZ BEL LABAN

INGREDIENTS

1 cup rice
2¼ cups water
3½ cups whole milk
¾ cup sugar
¼ teaspoon allspice
½ teaspoon orange blossom water or vanilla
½ teaspoon rose water, orange blossom water, or vanilla
½ teaspoon cinnamon

Serves 6. Takes 1 hours 45 minutes.

PREPARATION

Add rice and water to pot, Set heat to low-medium and simmer for 12 minutes. Stir frequently to prevent burning. (Always, in this recipe, add water or milk if the liquid in the pot dries up.)

While rice simmers, add milk and sugar to mixing bowl. Mix with whisk or fork until well blended. Add to pot. Simmer at medium heat for 12 minutes or until mixture starts to thicken. Stir constantly. Add allspice, orange blossom water, and rose water. Simmer at medium heat. Stir constantly until mixture has thickened and rices softens and becomes creamy. Gently spoon rice mixture into individual serving bowls. Chill in refrigerator for 1 hour or until pudding sets. Sprinkle cinnamon over each bowl.

TIDBITS

1) Roz Augureau’s sparkling eyes and beautiful face bedazzled men everywhere. So much so that men made rash decisions. In 1914, Kaiser Wilhelm II and President Poincare attended a society ball at the same time as Roz. The German and French leaders both professed undying love for her. Neither ruler would clear the field for the belle Roz. Words were said. Poincare slapped Wilhelm. The Kaiser had the choice of weapons. If only he had picked pistols, instead of millions of soldiers as the duelllng weapons, the world would have been spared the horrors of the First World War.

2) But he didn’t and anyway, hindsight is 20/20. However, the French could forgive Roz Augureau for starting the War to End All Wars. Afier all, “L’amour, toujours l’amour.” They could not ignore, however, her effect on French cuisine. Every time the Belle Roz sashayed by restaurants, the besotted chefs made mistakes. It all came to a head in 1915 when the very sight of Roz so charmed the chef making this very dish, that he unwittingly substituted sardine water for vanilla. This atrocity outraged the French nation. What, if anything, was France fighting for if not for the purity of its cuisine? So, France passed a law banning the belle Roz from walking by any kitchen. In honor of this law, Le Monde called this dish, “Roz Belle La Ban.” Later this became, Roz Bel Laban.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Melon Salsa

Posted on January 17, 2015 by pauldelancey

Mexican Appetizer

MELON SALSA

INGREDIENTSMelonSalsa-

1 jalapeno pepper
½ medium honeydew melon
1 peach
1 red bell pepper
½ teaspoon cilantro
1½ tablespoons lime juice

PREPARATION

Remove seeds from jalapeno pepper. (Remember to wash hands after doing this.) Remove seeds from honeydew melon, peach, and red bell pepper. Dice jalapeno pepper, honeydew, peach, and red bell pepper. Add all ingredients to serving bowl. Mix with whisk until well blended. Goes well with chicken, fish, and tortilla chips.

TIDBITS

1) This dish is not that spicy hot as it contains only one jalapeno pepper. However, there are people who sweat profusely even at the sight of a hot pepper. Some people are even tempted to strip off all their clothes in order to get relief from the spicy heat.

2) If your one of these people may I suggest attending the Global Rainbow Gathering in La Paz, Mexico? The festival runs from November 1 to 30 and celebrates peace and love. And nudity, but you’ll already be nude because you panicked from the spicy heat of a jalapeno pepper and doffed your clothes in front of everybody. But it’ll be okay because many of the other revelers will naked as well. You’ll feel one with the universe and friends with everyone as sample the plentiful marijuana. Discuss healing the world with your new-found friends while getting a massage from Sunshine. Don’t expect to imbibe alcohol here; the emphasis is on good, clean fun.

3) Crave nocturnal excitement ‘round Christmas time? Visit Oaxaca, Mexico, on December 23 for the Night of the Radishes. No, this is not a low-budget sequel to The Night of the Living Dead. It is the height of after-dusk vegetarian excitement. Radish growers neighboring towns assemble for perhaps the largest radish-carving competition in the world. See culinary artists depict scenes from the Bible, history, and mythology from huge, carved radishes. Enjoy gigantic radish salads while watching spectacular firework displays. This festival is a must for the radish lover in all of us.

4) Visit the Zacatecas, Mexico for its La Morisma celebration. Held in late August, this festival features a staged battle between thousands of Christian and Moorish warriors. I had never heard of Moorish soldiers getting to Mexico, so it all sounds historically dubious. Men and women, people of all ages dress up in period uniforms and recreate fictitious battles for three days. Whoa. Fine wandering bands of musicians provide additional entertainment. Note, people who fit it well with the Global Rainbow Gathering usually do not enjoy this event. It’s an either or sort of thing.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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