Posts Tagged With: Bible

Pepper Jack Meatloaf

American Entree

PEPPER JACK MEATLOAF

INGREDIENTS

1 small white onion
1 small red onion
3 garlic cloves
1½ tablespoons olive oil
1½ pounds ground beef
3 large eggs
1 tablespoon parsley
1 green bell pepper
1 green chile
1 14.5 can diced tomatoes
½ teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon cumin
½ teaspoon tarragon
2 teaspoons fresh cilantro
1 cup grated pepper jack cheese
1½ cups bread crumbs

SPECIAL UTENSIL

8″-x-8″ baking dish

Serves 4. Takes 1 hour 20 minutes.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mince red onion, white onion, and garlic. Add this to olive oil and sauté on medium heat until soft or about 6 minutes. Dice bell pepper and green chile. Combine red onion, white onion, garlic, ground beef, eggs, bell pepper, green chile, diced tomatoes, coriander, cumin, tarragon, cilantro, pepper jack cheese, and bread crumbs. You really need to use your hands to do a good job here.

(Better yet, get your nine-year old to mix this up. He’ll welcome the opportunity to be helpful while getting his hands messy. Take advantage of this willingness before he becomes a teenager.)

OR…dice and mince all the above ingredients and put them all into the oil to sauté at once. This will save six minutes.

(Saving six minutes is particularly useful if there is an accidental nuclear countdown near your home, you’re the only one with the key to abort the launch with the resulting global nuclear war, and you really don’t have the extra six minutes needed to perform this extra culinary step, eat this meal, and get to the missile silo in time.)

Spray 8″-by-8″ baking dish with no-stick cooking spray. Transfer the meat mix to this dish. Smooth the meat until it is a flat as the Kansan prairie. Bake for 50 minutes at 350 degrees. Let cool for 5 minutes.

TIDBITS

1) According to The Tales of the Arabian Nights, coriander is an aphrodisiac.

2) We should all absorb the lessons of great literature.

3) Coriander is also mentioned in the Bible. The Bible does not mention any non-culinary benefits from Tarragon.

4) Indeed, The Good Book commands, “Do not commit adultery.”

5) Sometime in the 1600s, two English publishers came out with a Bible with the exciting command, “Thou Shall Commit Adultery.”

6) The King of England fearing for the morals of his people, outlawed this version of the Bible, and heavily fined the publishers.

7) Editing and correct spicing are musts.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Motivational Poster #11, Be an Editor

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This really happened. An early edition of the King James Bible urged the faithful to commit adultery. King James was not amused and fined the publishers rather heavily. If only they had hired an editor. Be an editor! Keep the world moral.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: motivational | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Spotlight on Wil 3 – Author of “Heartly God?”

Excerpt from Heartly God?

 

Chapter Three

The protestors’ movement, if it can be deservingly titled as such, was aimed at the removal of Father O’Toole from St. Mary’s Parish and the whole Catholic Church. It started with a few unhappy parishioners who didn’t take kindly to Father O’Toole’s most recent and more progressive sermons. A few unhappy parishioners led to a few unhappy families, who then enlisted the help of other, very concerned, non-parishioners who were equally offended by what Father O’Toole had to say. Although they never actually heard it first-hand, but through their friends, which apparently was good enough to cause them to be offended.

At first, the movement was easily ignored by the remaining St. Mary’s faithful and by Father O’Toole. But when it became apparent that it had grown and was not going away, Father O’Toole decided it was time to engage the protestors in dialogue. That was a mistake. The dialogue was short-lived and within a matter of minutes, Father O’Toole’s Irish got the better of him and he had to be physically restrained and separated from the group. The “swear jar” Father O’Toole kept in the office behind the altar was contributed to heavily that day by him.

It used to be easy for Father O’Toole to bridge gaps between those who were with him and those who were against him. He made a short career of that in the Army prior to the priesthood. It seemed to him that he was losing that ability due to his old age in the same way that he was losing his hair and his hearing. Sadly, Father O’Toole’s lack of statesmanship only fueled the fire of the protestors’ movement. The following week, after word got out via social media, the movement doubled in size. The week after that, the local media was at the 9:00 AM. Mass to cover the protestors. A thirty-second clip of the protestors aired on local news the following Monday.

“We are protesting Father O’Toole’s ludicrous message! The Bible says that a man should not lay down with another man. That is a sin. It’s an abomination against nature! Women who have abortions are killing babies! They don’t need forgiveness; they need to be locked up!!”

Once the media coverage of the protestors’ movement aired, the Bishop and other higher-ups in the Church became heavily involved in the situation. The Bishop didn’t necessarily agree with Father O’Toole’s new message or ministry. In fact, he never really saw eye-to-eye with Father O’Toole on much of anything. But more importantly, he did not like to see one of his churches under siege. It was bad for business. Attendance at Mass was down because many of the remaining parishioners felt uneasy trying to navigate amongst the protestors as they tried to get into the church. Accordingly, the weekly collection started to come up short … very short at times.

The stress on the income stream necessitated constant communication, which Father O’Toole equated to constant aggravation, between him and the Bishop. If he wasn’t talking to the Bishop, he was talking to one of the Bishop’s underbosses. If it wasn’t an underboss, it was someone from the Diocese public relations department. If it wasn’t public relations, it was a Diocese lawyer. All the stress and constant watchdogging of Father O’Toole made him physically tired and mentally weak. Making the situation worse was Father O’Toole’s acknowledgment that he simply did not have the time to devote to the parishioners who still needed him, or to those unfortunate sick and dying people that he would minister to in three of the local hospitals.

Father O’Toole was no longer a young man. Far from it. He should have retired years ago, by his age. But he grew up in the Strip District, went to St. Mary’s grade school and he welcomed the opportunity to become the pastor at St. Mary’s when the opportunity presented itself. Truth be told, St. Mary’s was on the verge of collapse before Father O’Toole’s arrival. The Diocese plan was to let Father O’Toole run the parish for one or maybe two years, then close it down and sell it to a developer for a big profit. It was expected that Father O’Toole would retire after that. It was a clever and convenient strategy by the Diocese and their legal think tank. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Father O’Toole actually grew the parish in the short time that he had been pastor. Prior to the protestors’ movement, St. Mary’s Parish had become bigger and stronger than ever. Father O’Toole initially felt a youthful resurgence as the parish grew around him, but in the wake of this protest movement, Father O’Toole was not sure how much longer he could last. He was clearly nearing his breaking point.

The easiest way to resolve the problem would have been to reassign Father O’Toole to another parish. However, the higher-ups in the Diocese thought that move would signal the Church’s acquiescence to the will of the protestors. Besides, reassignment did not guarantee that the same thing would not happen at a different location. The last thing the Diocese wanted was to engage in war on two fronts. The Diocesan leaders asked Father O’Toole to retire, but that conversation was even shorter than Father O’Toole’s attempt at dialogue with the protestors. With all the brain power and money of the Diocese, nobody had any clear solution for resolving the situation. And they also knew that they were dealing equally with a very hard-headed old Irishman who never backed down from a fight before. Thus, they were all stuck and decided nothing could be done other than to ride it out. The situation evolved into a chicken fight between three entities to see just who had the most stamina.

One thing was for sure—the thick concrete walls and enormous oak doors of St. Mary’s that once created a spiritual and a physical safe-haven for the parishioners could no longer keep the din and ruckus of the protestors outside. In calmer days, the only sound that might have been heard from the outside during a Mass was the occasional siren on a police car or ambulance. Now, even the sirens couldn’t be heard over the protestors’ fanatical rants and chanting.

Bio

Wil 3 is a father, an educator and a retired college assistant basketball coach who graduated from Washington and Jefferson college with a double major in Political Science and Secondary Education. He has worked as a teacher and curriculum developer in several school districts and post-secondary institutions.  An advocate to end homelessness, Wil currently sits as a Board Member at “Hearts of the Homeless,” a 501(c)3 non-profit and regularly volunteers at Light of Life Mission in the North Side of Pittsburgh, PA.  Prior to releasing Heartly God?, Wil authored several one-act plays that have been performed by various theater groups in Western Pennsylvania.  Heartly God? is his first full-length novel.  When not writing, Wil can be found trout fishing or on a stand-up paddle board with his son Rider and occasionally practicing law, if time permits.

**********************

Paul De Lancey
www.pauldelancey.com

Categories: book reviews and excerpts | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Melon Salsa

Mexican Appetizer

MELON SALSA

INGREDIENTSMelonSalsa-

1 jalapeno pepper
½ medium honeydew melon
1 peach
1 red bell pepper
½ teaspoon cilantro
1½ tablespoons lime juice

PREPARATION

Remove seeds from jalapeno pepper. (Remember to wash hands after doing this.) Remove seeds from honeydew melon, peach, and red bell pepper. Dice jalapeno pepper, honeydew, peach, and red bell pepper. Add all ingredients to serving bowl. Mix with whisk until well blended. Goes well with chicken, fish, and tortilla chips.

TIDBITS

1) This dish is not that spicy hot as it contains only one jalapeno pepper. However, there are people who sweat profusely even at the sight of a hot pepper. Some people are even tempted to strip off all their clothes in order to get relief from the spicy heat.

2) If your one of these people may I suggest attending the Global Rainbow Gathering in La Paz, Mexico? The festival runs from November 1 to 30 and celebrates peace and love. And nudity, but you’ll already be nude because you panicked from the spicy heat of a jalapeno pepper and doffed your clothes in front of everybody. But it’ll be okay because many of the other revelers will naked as well. You’ll feel one with the universe and friends with everyone as sample the plentiful marijuana. Discuss healing the world with your new-found friends while getting a massage from Sunshine. Don’t expect to imbibe alcohol here; the emphasis is on good, clean fun.

3) Crave nocturnal excitement ‘round Christmas time? Visit Oaxaca, Mexico, on December 23 for the Night of the Radishes. No, this is not a low-budget sequel to The Night of the Living Dead. It is the height of after-dusk vegetarian excitement. Radish growers neighboring towns assemble for perhaps the largest radish-carving competition in the world. See culinary artists depict scenes from the Bible, history, and mythology from huge, carved radishes. Enjoy gigantic radish salads while watching spectacular firework displays. This festival is a must for the radish lover in all of us.

4) Visit the Zacatecas, Mexico for its La Morisma celebration. Held in late August, this festival features a staged battle between thousands of Christian and Moorish warriors. I had never heard of Moorish soldiers getting to Mexico, so it all sounds historically dubious. Men and women, people of all ages dress up in period uniforms and recreate fictitious battles for three days. Whoa. Fine wandering bands of musicians provide additional entertainment. Note, people who fit it well with the Global Rainbow Gathering usually do not enjoy this event. It’s an either or sort of thing.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Bad Artist #16, Churches

BadArtist16

CHURCH POLE VAULTING HAIKU #1

I fly through the air

With such magnificent ease

Because you will not move.

 

CHURCH POLE VAULTING HAIKU #2

You are quite unable

To move toward the middle.

So I must pole vault.

– Paul R. De Lancey,  Bad Artist

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cartoon, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Pepper Jack Meatloaf Recipe

American Entree

PEPPER JACK MEATLOAF

INGREDIENTSPeppeJM-

1/2 white onion
1/2 red onion
3 garlic cloves
1 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
1 1/2 pounds ground beef
3 large eggs
1 tablespoon parsley
1 green bell pepper
1 green chile
1 14.5 can diced tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon tarragon
2 teaspoons fresh cilantro
1 cup grated pepper jack cheese
1 1/2 cups bread crumbs

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mince red onion, white onion, and garlic. Add this to olive oil and sauté on medium heat until soft or about 6 minutes.

Dice bell pepper and green chile. Combine red onion, white onion, garlic, ground beef, eggs, bell pepper, green chile, diced tomatoes, coriander, cumin, tarragon, cilantro, pepper jack cheese, and bread crumbs. You really need to use your hands to do a good job here.

(Better yet, get your nine-year old to mix this up. He’ll welcome the opportunity to be helpful while getting his hands messy. Take advantage of this willingness before he becomes a teenager.)

OR…dice and mince all the above ingredients and put them all into the oil to sauté at once. This will save six minutes.

(Saving six minutes is particularly useful if there is an accidental nuclear countdown near your home, you’re the only one with the key to abort the launch with the resulting global nuclear war, and you really don’t have the extra six minutes needed to perform this extra culinary step, eat this meal, and get to the missile silo in time.)

Spray 8″-by-8″ baking dish with no-stick cooking spray. Transfer the meat mix to this dish. Smooth the meat until it is a flat as the Kansan prairie. Bake for about 1 hour at 350 degrees. Let cool for 5 – 10 minutes.

TIDBITS

1) According to The Tales of the Arabian Nights, coriander is an aphrodisiac.

2) We should all absorb the lessons of great literature.

3) Coriander is also mentioned in the Bible. The Bible does not mention any non-culinary benefits from Tarragon.

4) Indeed, The Good Book commands, “Do not commit adultery.”

5) Sometime in the 1600s, two English publishers came out with a Bible with the exciting command, “Thou Shall Commit Adultery.”

6) The King of England fearing for the morals of his people, outlawed this version of the Bible, and heavily fined the publishers.

7) Editing and correct spicing are musts.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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