Tajik Entree
QUROTOB
(Bread Salad)
INGREDIENTS – SALAD
2 pita loaves
1½ tablespoons olive oil (1½ more tablespoons later)
1 onion
2 green onions
1½ tablespoons olive oil
2 cups Greek yogurt
½ cup hot water
1 teaspoon lemon juice
½ teaspoon coriander
1 teaspoon dill
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon sugar
½ cucumber
4 tomatoes
1 tablespoon fresh cilantro
1 tablespoon fresh parsley
8 non breads (See above recipe) or other flatbreads such as fatir or pita
SPECIAL UTENSILS
cookie sheet
large serving plate
Serves 8. Takes 40 minutes.
PREPARATION
Preheat oven to 350 degrees, Brush pita loaves with 1½ tablespoons olive oil. Break loaves into small bits. Place pita bits on cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 15-to-20 minutes or until pita bits turn golden brown. (The time varies with the thickness of the pita loaves.)
While pita bits bake, dice onion and green onions. Add 1½ tablespoons olive oil, onion, and green onion to pan. Sauté at medium high heat for 5 minutes or until onion and green onion soften. Add Greek yogurt, hot water, lemon juice, coriander, dill, salt, and sugar to large mixing bowl. Whisk until well blended. Seed cucumber. Dice cucumber, tomatoes, cilantro, and parsley.
Add toasted pita bits to large serving plate. Pour yogurt mixture over pita bits. Top with sautéd onion and green onion, cucumber, and tomato. Garnish with cilantro and parsley. Guests use their non bread to scoop up the yogurty, veggie, bread salad from the communal serving plate. Alternatively, spread all the fixing over a non bread and use a knife and fork.
TIDBITS
1) How did this wonderful entree come about? Here is the time line.
2) 4,500 million years ago (mya): First single-celled organisms come into existence. So does the first spam e-mail involving Nigerian dictators and their money.
3) 4,000 mya: A woman named Sally shows up at the DMV without an appointment.
4) 3,500 mya: Earliest oxygen molecule. It’s name was Bob. There were no last names that long ago.
5) 2,500 mya: Oxygen crisis. Oxygen has mid-life jitters.
6) 1,200 mya: Earliest sexual reproduction. Single-cell dating sites occur. First pickup lines invented.
7) 800 mya: Multi-cellular organisms hit the world scene. Sally’s still in line.
8) 440 mya: 86% of all species are exterminated. First known appearance of DaleksTM.
9) 350 mya: Sharks with rows of nasty, pointy teeth show up. Dun-dun, dun-dun.
10) 275 mya: Theraspid synaspids branch off from pelycosaur synapsids; no idea what this means.
11) 225 mya: The world’s first dinosaurs come from out of nowhere. They aren’t met with thunderous applause;. no life forms have hands.
12) 220 mya: Gymosperm forests dominate land life. This is not as dirty as it sounds.
13) 219 mya: It takes life 1 millions years to spot the first typo. The correct spelling is gymnosperm.
14) 160 mya: Mammals show up. Life is great until …
15) 155 mya: Mosquitoes do also.
16) 65 mya: Dinosaurs get wiped out by gigantic meteor. Mammals begin their ascent to global supremacy. Did mammals engineer this event? Who knows? They leave no written record.
17) 63 mya: Creodonts, not to be confused with orthodontists, spontaneously appear.
18) 52 mya: First bats show up.
19) 51 mya: First balls appear.
20) 50 mya: Baseball becomes popular when organisms finally agree on rules.
21) 250 thousand years ago: Humans pop up in Eastern Africa.
22) 300 years ago. Human chefs create qurotob, bread salad. Sally gets her license. Life is good.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
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