Malaysian Soup
CURRY NOODLES
(laska)
INGREDIENTS – PASTE
1 large shrimp (1 pound more later in SOUP)
5 garlic cloves
4 macadamian nuts
6 fresh red chiles (remove seeds to make less spicy)
5 shallots
2 teaspoons coriander
½ teaspoon cumin
1 tablespoon curry powder
2 lemongrass stalks
2 teaspoons salt
2 teaspoons sugar
INGREDIENTS – SOUP
1 pound shrimp
6 ounces boneless chicken
8 ounces hard tofu
1 tablespoon vegetable oil (¼ cup more later)
¼ cup vegetable oil
6 ounces yellow egg noodles
8 ounces rice sticks or vermicelli
4 cups chicken stock
1 15 ounce can coconut milk
1 tablespoon lime juice
INGREDIENTS – TOPPINGS
3 ounces bean sprouts
2 hard-boiled eggs
1 lime
SPECIAL UTENSILS
1 pan
3 pots
makes 6 bowls
PREPARATION – PASTE
Peel and devein1 large shrimp. Let dry. Add 1 large shrimp, garlic cloves, macadamian nuts, red chiles, shallots, coriander, cumin, curry powder, lemongrass, salt, and sugar to food processor. Grind ingredients until paste is smooth.
PREPARATION – SOUP
Peel and devein 1 pound shrimp. Cut chicken and tofu into ½” cubes. Put tofu and 1 tablespoon vegetable oil in pan. Sauté tofu at medium-high heat until tofu turns golden brown.
Add ¼ cup vegetable oil to pot. Warm oil using medium heat. Add paste. Cook for 3 minutes or until paste darkens and become fragrant. Add chicken stock, coconut milk, and lime juice to pot. Bring to boil using high heat. Stir frequently. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add chicken, shrimp and tofu cubes. Continue simmering on low heat for another 10 minutes. Stir occasionally.
While chicken stock/coconut milk mix simmers, cook egg noodles and rice stick according to instructions on packages. (Will you need extra pots? Will you be cleaning pots after this meal? Yes, you will!) Drain noodles after they are done.
Place an equal amount of noodles into serving bowls. Add an equal amount of chicken stock/coconut oil/shrimp/tofu mix into bowls. Peel hard-boiled eggs and cut them into halves. Cut lime into 6 slices. Top bowls with hard-boiled egg halves, lime slices, and bean sprouts.
TIDBITS
1) Curry noodles is an anagram for cloudy snorer, uncool dryers, and nosy cod ruler.
2) Dryers are uncool because they steal our socks.
3) Dryers are actually alive. They are all aliens from the planet Rohoho.
4) Rohohans love socks, any planet’s socks.
5) But they love socks from Earth most of all.
6) That’s why the Rohohans come in the middle of the night, zap your clothes dryer into another dimension, and take its place. So, that clothes dryer in your home is actually an alien.
8) But it’s no big deal. Rohohans really don’t mind drying your clothes. In fact, they are rather good at it. They just eat one of your socks occasionally.
9) Why do they eat only one sock from a pair? No one knows for sure. The best guess is that they crave variety, just like we hate to eat 1,722 hot dogs in a row.
10) If you fill your socks with lutefisk, the Rohohans won’t touch them.
11) Of course, you won’t want to touch any of your lutefisk-scented clothes either. Life is hard.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Boo! I like German and Argentinian food equally well. And oh gosh, the game the Dutch lost was a mind-numbingly 0-0 tie that ended in a shoot-out. The Netherlands team played their last 240 minutes of World Cup play without ever scoring! I might just take my soccer ball and go home. They can’t play the final without a soccer ball. I know billions of people are waiting excitedly for this game, but I’m having a really bad day. So there! Unless, of course, Argentina or Germany let me play for them. Not only will I bring the soccer ball necessary for the game, I promise to score the winning goal. Wait could be more fair than that? I’m waiting for a phone call from Argentina and Germany. Taps foot.
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