Posts Tagged With: rosemary

Gravy

Posted on November 10, 2024 by pauldelancey

American Appetizer

GRAVY

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INGREDIENTS
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1 bouillon cube (the same type as the stock)
2⅓ cups chicken, beef, or turkey stock
¼ cup butter
¼ cup flour
½ teaspoon onion powder
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon rosemary
½ teaspoon sage
¼ teaspoon thyme
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Serves 6.  Takes 15 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Smash bouillon cube into bits. Add bouillon bits and broth to microwavable bowl. Microwave for 2 minutes or until bouillon bits dissolve. Mix with spoon until well blended. Add butter to pan. Melt butter using medium heat. Stir frequently and gently. Add flour. Stir constantly with whisk or fork for 2 minutes or until mixture turns golden brown.
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Slowly add stock/bouillon liquid to pan. Stir as you do so. Reduce heat to low-medium. Simmer for 4 minutes or until mixture bubbles and thickens to the consistency of gravy. Stir frequently, Add remaining ingredients. Stir with spatula until well blended.
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TIDBITS
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1) Is there nothing that gravy doesn’t make better? Here’s a partial list of dishes and foods made tastier with gravy. Biscuits, biscuits and sausage, butter, chicken fried steak, fried chicken, hamburger patties, herbed pork roast, mashed potatoes, meatloaf, mushrooms, polenta, pork chops, rice, roast beef, roasted turkey, Salisbury steak, sausage, stuffed bell peppers, stuffing, vegetables
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2) Are there any foods made worse by gravy? Pumpkin pie and orange juice come to mind.
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3) Fun historical fact. The first humans to come to North America came from Asia via the famous land bridge. Only the bridge wasn’t made with land. Wandering tribes came to the Bering Strait, which of course, filled with water. Well, poo. But these first North American were terrific problem solvers and gravy lovers. They carried millions of tons on the backs of pack animals wherever they went. Why so much? They loved gravy as who does not? (See tidbit 1.)
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4) Anyway, the problem solvers dumped half of their gravy into the Bering Strait. This water proved cold enough to freeze a gravy bridge connecting Siberia with Alaska. The land rush of North America was on! Note: you can no longer find this famous bridge. Cycles of prehistoric warming thawed the gravy bridge. Oh well.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Turkey Drumsticks

Posted on September 27, 2024 by pauldelancey

American Entree

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TURKEY DRUMSTICKS

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INGREDIENTS­
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2¼ pounds* turkey drumstick
¼ cup butter
⅜ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon garlic powder
½ teaspoon rosemary
½ teaspoon sage
1 teaspoon sea salt or salt
no-stick spray
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* = The weight of a drumstick varies wildly, from ½ pound to 2¼ pounds. The average weight for a turkey drumstick is ¾ pound.
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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no-stick spray
meat thermometer
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Serves 3. Takes 1 hour 45 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Use paper towels to pat turkey dry. Melt butter in small pot, using low-medium heat. Add pepper, garlic powder, rosemary, sage, and sea salt. Mix with fork or whisk until well blended. Brush all of the melted butter over the turkey legs. Spray baking pan with no-stick spray. Add turkey legs to baking pan. Roast turkey for 1 hour 30 minutes at 360 degrees or until internal temperature reaches 175 degrees.
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TIDBITS
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1) Late 18th century The United States of America just buzzed with music. And why not? It had just gained its independence by defeating Britain, the greatest empire in the world. At first things looked bleak for the former Thirteen Colonies. British armies would win battle after battle with planned attacks. They would coordinate their assaults by rapping out orders in Picton code on their drums.
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2) Unfortunately, the Continental Army couldn’t send messages via drums, for Britain had hoarded all the drumsticks. Then just in time for the Battle of Saratoga, Private Carl La Fong observed, “We have plenty of wild turkeys. Why not use turkey drumsticks on our drums?” General Washington ordered this to be done. The Continentals now tapped out orders to a string of victories. Britain gave up fighting and granted America its independence in 1783. As General Cornwallis wrote, “We couldn’t defeat them once they got the turkey drumstick.” So every time we dine on turkey drumsticks or listen to a drum corps, we’re honoring the soldiers who won us our independence.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Pork Medallions

Posted on March 6, 2024 by pauldelancey

American Entree

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PORK MEDALLIONS

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INGREDIENTS
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1½ pounds pork tenderloin
¼ teaspoon oregano
½ teaspoon sweet paprika or paprika
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon rosemary
1 garlic clove
1 small onion
1½ tablespoons olive oil
1 tablespoon butter
⅔ cup chicken broth
2 tablespoons parsley
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SPECIAL UTENSIL
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non-stick skillet or cast-iron frying pan
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Serves 4. Takes 40 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Cut pork tenderloin into 12 equal slices or medallions. Pat medallions dry with paper towels. Add oregano, sweet paprika, pepper, and rosemary to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended. Rub onto medallions. Dice garlic and onion.
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Add olive oil and 6 medallions to skillet. Sauté each medallion for 3 minutes at medium-high heat or until golden brown. Remove medallions and set aside. Repeat for 2nd batch of medallions, although cooking times might decrease. Remove these medallions and set aside.
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Keep heat at medium high. Add butter to skillet. Whisk butter and use spoon to remove brown bits. Add garlic and onion. Sauté for 1 minute. Stir frequently. Add broth, stirring gently. Bring to boil. Boil for 1 minute or until sauce thickens. Spoon the juice in the pan over the medallions. Garnish with parsley.
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TIDBITS
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1) The humble aardvark is a mammal that burrows at night. It hails from Africa and is the only living species of the order Tublidentata. I’ll bet you didn’t know that last bit.
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2) On the other hand, a medallion is a large medal or something resembling a large medal such as a wall panel. It can even be some dish that resembles a small medal, such as a pork medallions. Pork medallions can be eaten. Metal medallions cannot. Score one for pork medallions. Aardvarks don’t eat pork medallions. They eat ants. They burrow at night and we have come full circle.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Rosemary Olive Oil Soap

Posted on December 21, 2023 by pauldelancey

ROSEMARY OLIVE OIL SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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½ teaspoon green mica powder
1 tablespoon isopropyl alcohol
⅓ cup fresh rosemary
2 pounds olive oil soap base
1 teaspoon rosemary essential oil
isopropyl alcohol
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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spice grinder
soap mold
spray bottle
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 15 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Add rosemary to spice grinder. Grind until the rosemary bits are small as possible. Add green mica powder, and 1 tablespoon isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Cut olive oil base into 1″ cubes. Add olive oil base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 seconds. Stir after every time. Add green mica powder/isopropyl mix and rosemary essential oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 15 minutes. (This inhibits rosemary bits from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add rosemary bits. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol. Pour melted soap into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) There have been many great Rosemarys in the world. The top of the list are: Rosemary Clooney – singer, Rosemary Harris – movie actress, and Rosemary Wells – children’s author.
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2) The closest we have to an infamous Rosemary is Rose Mary Woods, President Nixon’s secretary, who testified that she’d accidently erased 18.5 minutes of a critical Watergate tape. Note the space between Rose and Mary in her name, so she really isn’t a full-blooded Rosemary. Basically you can count on any Rosemarys you meet to be a rather good egg. Just look for a space in the name. Even so, the world teems with good Rose Marys. Life can be complicated.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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What I Did the Day Before Tomorrow

Posted on December 20, 2023 by pauldelancey

1) Woke up. Got out of bed. Dragged a comb across my head. Showered, because cleanliness is a virture.

2) So is getting up. It’s important to get up, especially if you run the mile. As of press time, no one, man or woman, has won the mile race without getting of bed. I have no plans to compete in such a race. But it’s nice to know that if chose to do so, I could run my heart out.

3) Dressed casual. I was fit for society.

4) And I went out! For eye therapy. I  dodged people so adeptly that a Hall of Fame running back would be jealous.

5) Went over finances.

6)   Didn’t fight Verizon(tm) and Yahoo(tm). Maybe tomorrow. Of sure, I cussed a bit at them in the comfort of my office, but it was mostly perfunctory.

7)  Oh, not to worry, I came back from eye therapy. I walked both ways. Go me.

9) I made rosemary olive oil soap.

10) It didn’t turn out well. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

11)  Got out my spice grinder and ground the heck of the fresh rosemary. Atomized it, really.

12)  Performed multiple experiments on better ways of making Rosemary Olive Oil soap.

12) Made another batch. I’m praying that it will come out right.

13) Chatted briefly with Iceland and Paraguay. They agreed to postone their border dispute until I had more time to mediate. I expect a quick resolution as the two nations do not share a border.

14) Too tired to cook dinner. One of the natives is going out for chicken. Yay.

 

Behave yourselves.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Turkey Salisbury Steak With Pasta

Posted on May 1, 2023 by pauldelancey

American Entree

TURKEY SALISBURY STEAK WITH PASTA

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INGREDIENTS

2 garlic cloves
2 eggs
1 cup bread crumbs
½ teaspoon rosemary
½ teaspoon marjoram
½ teaspoon thyme
1½ pounds ground turkey
1½ tablespoons olive oil

4 tablespoons flour
2 cups chicken broth
3 teaspoons tomato sauce
3 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce

½ pound little-shell pasta (or another variety, if you prefer.)
brick for keeping this cook book open to this page

Makes 6 to 8 Salisbury steaks.

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Use hands to mix minced garlic, eggs, bread crumbs, marjoram, rosemary, thyme, and turkey in large mixing bowl. Form 6 to 8 patties.

Cook pasta according to instructions on package, or boil it for 5-to-7 minutes.

Meanwhile back at the range, pour oil into first of two frying pans. Add patties. Fry on medium-high heat for about 3 minutes on each side or until meat is no longer pink. Cover and keep warm.

While pasta and patties are cooking, add flour, chicken broth, tomato sauce, and Worcestershire sauce to another frying pan. Fry for about 5 minutes at medium-high heat, or until the sauce starts to boil. Stir frequently. Add cooked patties to this frying pan. Cook patties and sauce at low-medium heat for about 3 minutes.

Serve patties and sauce on top of cooked pasta. Yum.

TIDBITS

1) Salisbury steak was one of my favorites at the university cafeteria.

2) Liver and onions was my least favorite. They weren’t prepared well, so no one ever ate them. Well, maybe a few desperate vampires, but they usually dropped out of the university in their freshmen year due to most classes taking place in the daytime.

3) I rapidly learned never, NEVER, to eat the “Chef’s Surprise.” The only surprise about this dish is why people ever ate it. It was usually some gross dish that the chef had left over from the previous dinner. I owe my hold on sanity to forgetting the specifics of these meat masses.

4) On “Chef Surprise” nights, we usually ate at the University’s burger and hot-dog joint.

5) Pancakes at the university tasted well enough, but they were powerful hard to digest. I think some of them could have doubled as cannon balls.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Stifado (Stew from Cyprus)

Posted on April 22, 2021 by pauldelancey

Cypriot Entree

STIFADO
(Stew)

INGREDIENTS

2 pounds stewing beef
2 pounds frozen pearl onions*
½ tablespoon fresh rosemary
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 bay leaves
3 cups beef stock
3″ cinnamon stick
2 cloves
¾ teaspoon pepper
1½ cups red wine
2½ tablespoons red wine vinegar
water, if liquid cooks away too soon

* = Fresh pearl onions will taste a bit better than frozen ones. But my gosh, the fresh ones have to be peeled. You can speed up the peeling process by boiling, plunging them into cold water, and squeezing the pearl onion out of its skin. This peeling took me 40 minutes the one and only time I tried. I’d rather join the French Foreign Legion than do it again. Buy the frozen ones.

Serves 4. Takes 2 hours 30 minutes.

PREPARATION

Cut stewing beef into 1″ cubes. Peel pearl onions, if necessary. Dice rosemary. Add olive oil and beef cubes to large pan. Sauté at medium-high heat until all sides brown. Stir occasionally. Add pearl onions. Sauté at medium heat until onions soften. Stir frequently.

Add remaining ingredients. Stir until completely blended. Put lid on pan. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 1 hour 40 minutes or meat becomes quite tender and the liquid reduces to a thick sauce. Stir occasionally. (Add water as necessary, if liquid evaporates completely before beef cubes become tender.) Remove bay leaves and cinnamon stick.

TIDBITS

1) America’s Prohibition banned the selling and consumption of alcohol. If you were a barkeep and sold a customer a large whiskey, you were liable to arrest by a lurking cop. And your bar would be shut down. So customers took to calling a large whiskey, a stiff one. Such subterfuge, fooled the police only for a bit. They were naturally suspicious that a liquid that looking like whiskey, and being sold in a speakeasy was, in fact, whiskey. So, whiskey dens took to injecting avocados with whiskey. They called the new concoction “stifado,” a combination of “stiff one” and “avocado”. A visiting chef from Cyprus so loved the stifado, that he named his signature stew, “Stifado.” Now you know.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Herb Substitutions

Posted on March 7, 2013 by pauldelancey

HERB SUBSTITUTIONS

There comes a moment in every chef’s life when he or she simply doesn’t have every herb needed for that devastatingly delicious recipe and guests are arriving in 10 minutes and my gosh, oh my gosh. Fret not, simply consult the below list of herb substitutions and restore serenity to your life.

Basil – Italian seasoning, marjoram, oregano, thyme
Chervil – parsley, tarragon
Chive – green onion, leek, onion
Cilantro – chervil, parsley
Italian seasoning – basil, marjoram, oregano, parsley, red pepper (ground), rosemary, sage, savory, thyme
Mint – basil, marjoram, rosemary
Marjoram – basil, Italian seasoning, oregano, savory, thyme
Mustard, powder – horseradish powder, wasabi powder (1/4 times as much), prepared mustard (3 times as much)
Oregano – basil, Italian seasoning, marjoram, thyme
Parsley – basil, chervil, cilantro, Italian seasoning
Poultry seasoning – marjoram, rosemary, savory
Rosemary – Italian seasoning, poultry seasoning, thyme, tarragon
Sage – marjoram, poultry seasoning, rosemary, savory,
Savory – Italian seasoning, marjoram, poultry seasoning, sage, thyme
Tarragon – chervil, fennel seed, aniseed
Thyme – basil, Italian seasoning, marjoram, oregano, savory

According to my Webster’s New World Dictionary, an herb is, “any seed plant whose stem withers away to the ground after each season’s growth, as distinguished from a tree or shrub whose woody stem lives from year to year.”

Hot stuff, you betcha.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Suaasat – Greenlander Soup

Posted on February 12, 2013 by pauldelancey

Greenlander Soup

SUAASAT

INGREDIENTSSuaasat-

1 chicken breast (1 pound reindeer if you can get it)
1 onion
1 carrot
1 quart water
1/2 cup pearl barley
1/4 cup millet
1/4 teaspoon coriander
1/8 teaspoon sea salt
1/8 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon rosemary
1/2 teaspoon sage
1/2 teaspoon thyme

Makes 6 bowls

PREPARATION

Chop reindeer meat or chicken into 1/2″ cubes. Dice onions and carrots. Add cubes, onions, carrots, water, barley, millet, coriander, salt, pepper, rosemary, sage, and thyme to large pot. Cook soup on medium heat for about 1 hour or until chicken or reindeer cubes are fully cooked and barley and millet are tender.

TIDBITS

1) A Viking called Gunnbjorn discovered Greenland in 876.

2) Why does Gunnbjorn get all the credit for discovery when thousands of Eskimos had been living there for hundreds of years?

3) Because Gunnbjorn sounds a lot like GummiTM bears and everyone likes those.

4) Leif Erikkson discovered North America in 1000.

5) Why did Leif get all the credit when North America was discovered thousands of years by peoples crossing the land bridge between Siberia and Alaska thousands of years before?

6) Because Leif sounds exactly like leaf. The maple leaf grows on the maple tree. Maple trees produce maple syrup. Everybody loves maple syrup.

7) Proper branding is a must for all discoverers.

8) Erikkson is variant of Erickson. Erickson is the name of my Swedish born grandparents who settled in America about 100 years ago.

9) I don’t believe the Erikksons and Ericksons ever relinquished their claim of discovery.

10) So North America quite possibly belongs to me.

11) As long as North Americans love maple syrup.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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La Daube Provencale

Posted on December 15, 2012 by pauldelancey

French Entree

LA DAUBE PROVENÇALE

LaDauPr-

INGREDIENTS

1 1/2 pounds stewing steak or better
2 yellow onions
8 whole cloves
1 carrot
4 garlic cloves
1 10 ounce can diced tomatoes
4 tablespoons olive oil
4 ounces bacon strips
1 bay leaf
6 peppercorns
1/2 teaspoon orange zest
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1 teaspoon parsley
1 teaspoon sage
1 teaspoon rosemary
1 teaspoon thyme
1/4 cup red wine

PREPARATION

Cut the steak into 1/2-inch cubes. It is all right to use a better grade of steak than stewing. (As I write this recipe, my local supermarket is having such a sale on top sirloin it’s cheaper than the fattiest ground beef. Go figure. Now if they would only have a sale on gold.)

Peel the 2 onions and cut each of them into 4 wedges. Stick a whole clove into each of the 8 onion wedges. Scrape off the surface of the carrot. Cut the carrot into round pieces no more than 1/2-inch thick. Peel and mince garlic cloves.

Put olive oil and bacon strips in skillet. Heat at medium-heat until bacon begins to brown. (Some versions of this recipe call for strips or slices heavily marbled with fat. This is no problem at all. Simply pick the package of bacon that is on top of the others. Some good Samaritan has gone before you, heroically going through all the bacon packages looking for the meatiest and leaving you exactly what you wanted.)

Back at the range it is time to add to the skillet: steak cubes, onion wedges with cloves in them, carrot pieces, garlic,
diced tomatoes, bay leaf, peppercorns, orange zest, sea salt, parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme. (“Are you going to Scarborough Fair?” Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

Cook on medium heat until steak cubes start to brown. Add red wine. Bring to boil. Lower temperature to between off and warm. Cover with lid and let stew simmer for 2 1/2 hours.

This is great. Give it only to loved ones or a boss at promotion time.

TIDBITS

1) Insects don’t like the scent of onions. So, cut open an onion and rub the two halves all over your body before crossing a mosquito-infested swamp.

2) The French tried to build the Panama Canal before the Americans did. They failed because too many of their workers succumbed to malaria.

3) The Americans succeeded because they discovered malaria was borne by mosquitoes. We destroyed the pesky critters by destroying their swamps.

4) Mightn’t it have been simpler to have the canal workers rub their bodies with onion halves before going to work each day?

5) Of course, the thousands of sweaty, oniony workers would have had problems convincing beautiful ladies to dance with them after work.

6) But just how many spiffed-up young ladies could the workers have found in the middle of a mosquito-riddled swamp?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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