Posts Tagged With: De Lancey

Chocolate Mousse

Posted on April 12, 2015 by pauldelancey

French Dessert

CHOCOLATE MOUSSE

INGREDIENTSChocolateMousse-

6 ounces bittersweet chocolate
3 eggs
1½ cups heavy cream
6 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 can whipped cream (Optional in some households. Mandatory in mine.)
2 teaspoons chocolate shavings*

* = Already made chocolate shavings are hard to find. You may generate them by taking a grater or a knife to a bar of dark chocolate or
by using a food processor.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

sonic obliterator

PREPARATION

Add chocolate to pan. Cook on medium heat until chocolate melts completely Stir constantly. Put melted chocolate in large, first mixing bowl and let cool down to room temperature.

Separate egg whites from egg yolks. Add egg whites to second mixing bowl and beat them with whisk until you see peaks form. Add egg yolks to third mixing bowl and beat them egg yolks until they become fluffy. Add heavy cream, sugar, and vanilla extract to fourth mixing bowl. Whisk
until cream becomes frothy.

You may become frothy as well. Just don’t let anyone see you and if they do say you’re the chef and as chef you’re entitled to be this way and would you like to prepare dinner instead? No, I didn’t think so. Okay then, on with the recipe.

Fold egg yolks completely into melted chocolate. Fold egg whites completely into chocolate/egg white mix. Fold in heavy cream/sugar/vanilla extract mix until completely blended. Divide mousse equally between cups. Let guests garnish their mousses with a much whipped cream and chocolate shaving. Serve chilled.

Use sonic obliterator on any guests who use up the whipped cream. You don’t need the negativity of the succeeding, whipped-cream deprived guests.

TIDBITS

1) The plural of chocolate mousse is chocolate mousses.

2) The plural of moose is moose.

3) Why not?

4) Teddy Roosevelt ran for president in 1912 on the Bull Moose ticket.

5) In 1902, he saved a bear from getting shot. This idea inspired Morris Michtom to invent the teddy bear. Hundreds of millions of children have owned and loved this toy.

6) There’s a campaign picture from 1912 of Teddy Roosevelt riding a moose across a river.

7) This event inspired Silas B. Firefly to invent the chocolate moose. Chocolate moose were especially popular Easter treats for decades.

8) Indeed, we’d still be eating chocolate moose on Easter and other days as well if it weren’t for the disputed presidential election of 1960. Some people think there were enough voting irregularities in that campaign for Nixon to have won in a recount.

9) But a recount didn’t happen. Nixon thought a recount would have caused permanent divisions in America. Also, many culinary historians believe he made a deal with Kennedy. If he, Richard Nixon, would not contest the election, Kennedy would do all he could to drive the chocolate-moose manufacturers out of business, paving the way for chocolate-bunny dominance.

10) For Nixon was also a fervent chocolate-bunny lower and hated the more popular moose design. His parents never could find chocolate bunny to give their irate little Richard on Easter morning.

11) Although he never talked about it, the whole thing left Richard Milhous Nixon embittered for life. Nixon entered politics with a strong desire to set things right in America. He eventually became president.

12) As president, Nixon went to China. He negotiated treaties with them. As a result, Chinese food became wildly popular in America. We didn’t have to eat weird things in JelloTM molds any more. Nixon became wildly popular.

12) Then came Watergate. His involvement in those political shenanigans made him wildly unpopular. People forgot that all the undiscovered China dishes he brought back to this land. They forgot how good Jello could taste just by itself. Oh, and they forgot how he brought a stable, less threatening relationship with China. So, he resigned.

13) But his legacy of the chocolate Easter bunny lives on. We have not had a nuclear war since the chocolate bunny won our hearts.

14) And every president since Nixon gives a chocolate bunny to every world leader who visits America. Two bunnies, if the foreign dignitary visits the White House on Easter.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Dr. Economics – Stock Opportunities During Limited Nuclear War

Posted on April 10, 2015 by pauldelancey

StockGraph

Hold on, eager investors, I’m not going to mislead you. Not every stock is going to rise during a limited nuclear war. There will, however, be a few nuggets here and there. But first, let’s decide on a definition for a limited nuclear war. For our purposes, it shall be one modest nuclear missile lobbed at one of our major cities by some disgruntled country, DC, that is really, really peeved at us. I won’t name names, DCs, that would be impolite, but you know who you are. Don’t make me come back there.

What would be the general effect of that peeved country nuking one of our cities? Sad to say, it’s almost a certainty the market would react negatively to such news. Why? The market hates uncertainty, even more than you hated going to the dentist as a kid. Just look how the housing/lending crisis, a few hundred billion dollars lost here and there and WHAMO!, the stock market plunges 50%

But even more uncertainty would result from even so pro forma a strike as one nuclear missile. Who know, that DC might up and launch another ten or twenty missiles at our cities. If that isn’t uncertainty, then what is? So, I feel safe in saying that even one obliterated city would drive the stock market down by more than 50%. And that goes for all major indices, not just the DJIA.

Such pessimism by the market is only natural. Who hasn’t taken an occasional view whether from a marital spat, an unkind word from a colleague, or an undeserved parking ticket. But life is never all bad. All clouds have a silver lining, even a smallish nuclear war.

Suppose some bad country’s nuclear missile wiped out Chicago, forever wiping out the Cub’s chances to win the World Series. Chicago is littered with insurance companies. They would be vaporized. Less competition for out-of-Chicago insurance companies means more profits for them. More profits mean higher share prices.

There, I see the smile coming back to your face. Just make sure pick an insurance company with limited exposure to the windy city. Chicago is also a major rail and air hub. Sell all railroad and airline companies going through there in favor of ones with hubs in St. Louis or New Orleans. Furthermore, the future for hospital stocks would look particularly bright with many people likely to need multiple, expensive treats.

See? A modest nuclear strike would present many opportunities for the savvy investor. Be one.

– Paul De Lancey, Dr. Economics

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

 

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Biram Ruzz

Posted on April 9, 2015 by pauldelancey

Egyptian Entree

BIRAM RUZZ

INGREDIENTSBiramRuzz-

3 tablespoons butter
1 cup uncooked long-grain rice (1 more cup later)
2 pounds boneless chicken thighs or breasts
1 cup uncooked long-grain rice
½ teaspoon cardamom
½ teaspoon nutmeg
½ teaspoon pepper
1¼ teaspoons salt
2 cups chicken stock
1 cup heavy cream
1⅓ cups milk

SPECIAL UTENSIL

2 quart casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Melt butter. Use brush to coat side of casserole dish with melted butter. Spread 1 cup rice evenly over casserole dish. Place chicken thighs evenly over bottom layer of rice. Sprinkle cardamom, nutmeg, pepper, and salt over chicken and rice. Spread 1 cup of rice evenly over the chicken thighs. Add chicken stock, heavy cream, and milk to pan. Bring to boil using high heat. Stir constantly. Pour liquid over top layer of rice in casserole dish. Bake at 375 degrees 30 minutes. Remove from oven and cover with lid and let sit for 30 minutes.

Use spoon to loosen rice from edges of casserole dish. Remove lid. Place large serving place over casserole dish. Firmly hold casserole dish and serving plate together and quickly invert them so that the contents of the casserole dish are now upside down on the serving plate.

TIDBITS

1) Ancient Egyptians loved the board game, “Senet.” It was simple and a blast to play. Nearby kings constantly came to Egypt to play Senet and often ended up concluding treaties of friendship.

2) Then, in 675 BC, Pharaoh Taharka challenged the Assyrian leader, Esharddon, to play Qunark, a game resembling the modern ScrabbleTM.. Taharka drew the bird-like letter “A” to make “antihistamine” for a triple word score for 528 points. Esharddon claimed pharaoh had really drawn the bird-like letter “W” and had not come up with not a word at all. He called Taharka a low-down dirty hippo. Taharka slugged Esharddon who went home in a huff. The Assyrian king returned with a mighty army. Egypt would chafe under foreign domination for much of the next millennium.
Culinary historians say this is why Scrabble comes with pre-drawn letters.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Omelette Aux Fines Herbes

Posted on April 1, 2015 by pauldelancey

French Breakfast

OMELETTE AUX FINES HERBES

INGREDIENTSOmeletteAuxFines-

12 eggs
2½ tablespoons fresh chervil*
3 tablespoons fresh chives*
2 tablespoons fresh parsley*
1 tablespoon fresh tarragon*
4 tablespoons unsalted butter (1 tablespoon per omelette.)

* = This dish really is better with fresh herbs. However, it’s often difficult to obtain all of these herbs fresh. In this event, substitute 1 teaspoon dried herb for every 1 tablespoon fresh herb. We live in a world to stay-at-home chefs. There’s probably an heroic, but tragic ancient myth to explain the unavailability of fresh herbs.

Makes 4 omelettes. Takes 20 minutes.

PREPARATION

Add eggs to large mixing bowl. Use to whisk to gently blend eggs. Dice chervil, chives, parsley, and tarragon. Add all these herbs to small mixing bowl and blend with fork. Add ½ of the mixed herbs to eggs in the large mixing bowl. Fold herbs into eggs with whisk.

Add 1 tablespoon butter to large pan. Melt using medium heat. Do not let butter bubble; it will be too hot. Add ¼ of the blended egg/herb mixture, about ½ cup, to pan. Shake pan to ensure an even coating of the egg/herb mixture over the pan. Sprinkle ¼ of the remaining dry herb mix over egg/herb mix in pan.

Cook on medium heat until eggs are only slightly runny in the middle; tilting the pan occasionally to let uncooked part of the eggs to run to the bottom. Remove from heat. Use spatula to fold two sides of eggs toward middle. Serve at once.

TIDBITS

1) Just clink glasses together when toasting in France. Clink one glass at a time. Don’t cross any person’s arm while clinking. Follow all these rules or be cursed with seven years of bad sex.

2) If you crack open an egg and see two yolks, someone you know will soon be having twins. I didn’t know that, but I took economics instead of biology.

3) For pity’s sake, make sure you crush the 12 eggshells from this recipe. If you don’t, a witch will reassemble the pieces, head out to sea, and make horrific, huge storms. Admirals from all the world’s navies worry about this a lot.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bangers and Mash

Posted on March 23, 2015 by pauldelancey

British Entree

BANGERS AND MASH

INGREDIENTSBangersAndMash-

1 large onion
2 pounds potatoes
5 tablespoons butter (2 tablespoons more later)
6 tablespoons milk
½ tablespoon mustard
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
8 pork sausages (Do try to get authentic British bangers.)
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 tablespoons butter
4 cups beef broth
⅓ cup red wine
4 tablespoons flour

Makes 8 bangers and mash. Takes 1¼ hours.

PREPARATION

Thinly slice onion. Peel and cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Add potatoes cubes to large pot. Cover potato with water. Bring to boil using high heat. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 15-to-20 minutes or until potato is tender. Drain water. Mash potatoes with, well, a potato masher. Add 5 tablespoons butter, milk, mustard, pepper, and salt. Cover and set aside.

While potato cubes are simmering. add pork sausages and vegetable oil to pan Fry sausages for 20 minutes using medium heat or until sausages turn golden brown. Cover and stir occasionally. Remove sausages and keep covered.

Add onion and 2 tablespoons butter to pan. Sauté onion for 5 minutes on medium-high heat or until onion softens. Add beef broth and red wine to pan. Bring to boil using high heat and cook for 5 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add flour. Cook on medium-high for 10 minutes or until gravy starts to thicken. Stir occasionally.

Place a sausage and an equal amount of mashed potatoes on each plate. Cover with an equal amount of onion gravy.

TIDBITS

1) Rationing in Britain during World War I and immediately afterward resulted in butchers adding water to their sausages. This way they could still sell the same amount of sausages with less meat. The water in the sausages expanded during cooking and would burst open the casing with a bang.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Muamba Nsusu (Congolese chicken peanut soup)

Posted on March 21, 2015 by pauldelancey

Congolese Soup

MUAMBA NSUSU
(chicken peanut soup)

INGREDIENTSMuambaNsusu-

2½ pounds chicken breasts
½ teaspoon salt
1 large carrot
1 red chile
1 large yellow onion
2 tomatoes
5 cups chicken stock
¾ teaspoon cumin
1 tablespoon lemon zest
¾ cup creamy peanut butter
5 ounces tomato paste
1 tablespoon red palm oil (1½ tablespoons more later)
1½ tablespoon red palm oil
⅓ cup peanuts

Makes 12 bowls. Takes about 1 hour.

PREPARATION

Cut chicken into 1″ cubes. Rub salt onto chicken cubes. Dice carrot, chile, onion, and tomatoes. (Don’t remove seeds from chile and be sure to wash your hands afterward.) Add chicken stock, cumin, lemon zest, peanut butter, diced tomatoes, and tomato paste to large mixing bowl. Mix with whisk until well blended.

Add 1 tablespoon red palm oil and chicken cubes to large pot. Sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink on outside. Stir frequently. Set aside. Add 1½ tablespoons red palm oil, carrot, chile, and onion to pan. Sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. The chicken in the pot and the red palm oil/carrot/onion mix in the pan can be sautéed at the same time.

Add chicken stock/peanut butter/tomato mixture from mixing bowl to pot. Simmer on low-medium heat for 20 minutes or until the soup is well blended. Stir occasionally. Add chicken cubes to pot. Simmer for 5-to-10 minutes or until soup thickens. Garnish with peanuts.

TIDBITS

1) All chefs make the occasional mistake. It’s useful in these events to have a prepared excuse. Mine is plate tectonics. The shifting positions of the Earth’s continents made me burn those eggs. If the mistake was caused by someone ELSE, zap the offender with your sonic obliterator. You don’t need that negativity in your life.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Papo de anjo (Cheesy egg puffs)

Posted on March 20, 2015 by pauldelancey

Brazilian Dessert

PAPO DE ANJO
(syrupy egg puffs)

INGREDIENTSPapoDeAnjo-

1 cup water
1 cinnamon stick
3 cloves
1¾ cups confectioner’s sugar
½ teaspoon vanilla extract
9 egg yolks
1 egg white
no-stick spray
1 tablespoon butter

SPECIAL UTENSIL

12-cup muffin tin
electric beater
casserole dish or oven-safe ban large enough to hold muffin tin

Takes 2 hours or more, depending on how long you wait for the syrup to permeate the egg puffs. Makes 12 egg puffs.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Add water, cinnamon stick, cloves, and sugar to pot. Cook using low-medium heat for 2 minutes or until sugar dissolves. Stir frequently. Add vanilla extract. Bring sugar water to boil using high heat. Stir constantly. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 5 minutes or until sugar water becomes a syrup. Stir frequently. Remove from heat and cover.

Add egg yolks to first mixing bowl. Beat egg yolks using electric beater set on whip until they are frothy and have doubled in size. Add egg white to second mixing bowl. Beat egg white using electric beater set on whip until egg white forms soft peaks. Fold egg white into first mixing bowl with egg yolks.

Spray muffin cups with no-stick spray. Coat muffin cups with butter. Ladle equal amounts of egg mix in muffin cups. Put muffin tin in casserole dish. Add water to casserole dish until it comes halfway up the muffin cups. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until egg puffs become firm and become golden brown. Remove from oven and cool on wire rack for 30 minutes.

Add syrup and egg puffs to mixing bowl. Poke holes in egg puffs with toothpick. syrup. Ladle syrup over egg puffs. Let egg puffs sit for at least 30 minutes to absorb syrup. Refrigerate if egg puffs will sit in syrup for several hours or overnight. Tell adoring guests to use forks when eating this dessert. Tell unappreciative people to syrupy cheese puffs with their hands.

TIDBITS

1) Papo de anjo is an anagram for Joan Pod Poe.

2) Joan could be a descendant of Edgar Allan Poe. It’s hard to say.

3) It’s also quite possible that Joan goes every year to the Bloco de Lama or Mud Festival in Paraty, Brazil.

4) This year the festival was held on February 16.

5) Which is still useful information if you have a time machine.

6) If not, you will have to wait for next year. Plan way in advance! Hotels fill up early as this is a happening event. Where else do you get to smear mud all over yourself and chant, “Uga, uga, uga, rah, rah, rah” with thousands of other mud-covered revelers?

7) Some say the festival honors our caveman/cavewoman roots. Other maintain it pays hommage to the fishermen who would rub mud over themselves to keep mosquitoes away.

8) I don’t know why the fishermen didn’t use bug spray, wear hats with mosquito netting, or simply wear light clothes over every inch of their body.

9) But now, Bloco de Lama, which I hope means blockhead llama in Portuguese, is quite the party, with a blend traditional native music, hip hop, rave, and other musical genres.

10) And dance the night away in your prehistoric bikinis and SpeedosTM.

11) And then go back to your hotel, take a nice, hot relaxing bath, and let the mud gently fall from your body to the bottom of your spacious tub.

12) Boy! I bet housekeeping really hates this festival. Can you imagine having to every day clean dozens of tubs caked with dried mud?

13) No wonder the maids of Paraty, Brazil refer to the tourists as blockhead llamas.

14) Pele, the world’s greatest soccer player, is not a llama. Indeed, no soccer players are.

15) Soccer players do get muddy though when they play on muddy soccer fields. This just happens. It is not done to honor their Neanderthalic ancestors.

16) Indeed mud can be found all over the world, wherever there is dirt and rain.

17) If your town has mud, why not start its own Mud Festival? It’s a guaranteed tourist draw, especially if Joan Pod Poe makes an appearance. Just don’t call her a pod person. She doesn’t like it.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Easy Beef Pho

Posted on March 13, 2015 by pauldelancey

Vietnamese Soup

EASY BEEF PHO

INGREDIENTSEasyBeefPho-

2 cups beef pho broth
12 ounces rice noodles
8 ounces thinly sliced sirloin
4 ounces deli-sliced roast beef

½ cup fresh basil
5 green onion stalks
1 or 2 jalapeno peppers
3 limes
2 cups bean sprouts
½ tablespoon chili garlic sauce
2 tablespoons fish sauce or hoisin sauce

Makes 10 bowls. Takes 25 minutes.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

sonic obliterator

PREPARATION

Add beef pho broth to pan. Cover and bring to boil on high heat. Reduce heat to low and simmer until all ingredients are ready. Add rice noodle to second pot. Cook according to instructions on package. Drain noodles.

While pho broth boils and rice noodles cook, dice basil and green onion. Thinly slice jalapeno pepper and limes. Add sirloin and roast beef to pot with pho broth. Simmer on low heat until sirloin is no longer pink. Divide rice noodles, basil, green onion, jalapeno pepper, bean sprouts, chili garlic sauce, and fish sauce between bowls. Garnish with lime slices. Ladle equal amounts of pho broth with meat into bowls. Serve to adoring guests.

Some guests might complain that this recipe isn’t authentic, that it skips steps, that it doesn’t use pig knuckles, and so on. You could reason with them, saying you can’t find beef knuckles at your local supermarket, you didn’t even know beeves had knuckles, and that properly prepared pho.takes five days, and that you have a life to live. Or . . . you could simply zap them with your sonic obliterator. You don’t need their negativity in your life.

TIDBITS

1) Pho is an anagram for hop. Hop On Pop is a book by Dr. Seuss. Culinary historians think the author had been planning to write No Mo’ Pho but decided against it when he discovered pho is actually pronounced “fuh.” It’s all for the best as Hop On Pop brought Dr. Seuss enduring fame.

 

 Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Migas – Mexican Breakfast

Posted on March 2, 2015 by pauldelancey

Mexican Breakfast

MIGAS

INGREDIENTSMigas-

6 eggs
4 6″ corn tortillas
1 avocado
½ small onion
1 tomato
¼ cup vegetable oil
2 tablespoons butter
4 ounces chorizo
4-ounce can diced green chiles
1 cup crumbled queso fresco or Four Mexican cheeses
⅔ cup salsa

Makes 4 plates. Takes 20-to-30 minutes

PREPARATION

Add eggs to mixing bowl. Beat eggs with whisk until well blended. Cut tortillas into 1″ squares. Dice avocado, onion and tomato. Add oil to pan. Adjust heat to medium. To see if oil is ready, dip a tortilla square into the oil. The oil is sufficiently hot, when bubbles form on the dipped tortilla squares. Sauté on medium heat for 5 minutes or until tortilla squares are crispy and start to brown. Keep pressing tortilla chips into the oil. Keep turning over tortilla squares to avoid burning. Remove crispy tortilla squares from heat and place them on paper towels.

Add butter, onion and tomato to pan. Sauté on medium heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add chorizo and green chiles to pan. Cook on medium heat for 3 mintes. Stir occasionally. Add eggs, queso fresco and salsa to pan. Cook using medium heat for 5 minutes or until eggs are done to your liking. Cover. Stir occasionally.. Garnish with tortilla squares and avocado.

TIDBITS

1) Migas looks as if it should be pronounced “My gas.” Imagine texting your loved one with, “Honey, come home and taste my gas.”

2) This dish, however incorrectly pronounced tastes great. The following is a list of unfortunately named, but scrumptious dishes:

PregoTM Spaghetti Sauce, Spotted Dick (British pudding), Pissaladière (sorta French pizza),
Stinking Bishop (British cheese), turducken (roasted chicken stuffed in duck stuffed in turkey),
Wurst (German), Pigeons au Crapaudine (French pigeons), Toad in the Hole (British sausage in bread), Pu Pu Platter (Chinese-American appetizers), Horseradish, and Blood Pudding (British).

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Welsh Rarebit

Posted on March 1, 2015 by pauldelancey

British Entree

WELSH RAREBIT

INGREDIENTSWelshRarebit-

6 slices bread
1 tomato
3 tablespoons butter
2½ cups shredded Caerphilly or cheddar cheese
2 tablespoons flour
½ teaspoon mustard
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
½ cup or 8 ounces beer*

* = You probably opened a 12-ounce bottle of better to get this. This will leave 4 ounces of beer for yourself. Okay, it’s not the greatest perk in the world, but it’s a start.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

baking sheet

Takes about 15 minutes, not including the time to preheat your oven.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 500 degrees. Toast bread. Cut tomato into 6 slices. Add butter and cheese to pan. Cook using low heat for 10 minutes or until all is melted. Stir frequently. Add flour, mustard, pepper, salt, and Worcestershire sauce. Mix with whisk until smooth. Simmer on low heat for 3 minutes or until mixture bubbles. Stir constantly. Add beer. Bring sauce to boil, stirring constantly. Remove sauce from heat.

Top each bread slice with a tomato slice. Ladle sauce equally over bread. Place sauce covered bread in oven. Broil at 500 degrees for 2 minutes or until sauce becomes brown. Serve right away to your hungry horde.

TIDBITS

1) The Mongol horde conquered much of Asia and Europe in the 13th century. Numbering in the thousands and thousands they probably would have eaten many more Welsh rarebits than your hungry horde mentioned above.

2) Many culinary historians think the Mongols would not have been so driven to conquer, loot, massacre, and enslave if their cuisine had been as tasty as this dish. Bummer.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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