Posts Tagged With: anagram

Chocolate Sticky Cake

Posted on July 20, 2014 by pauldelancey

Swedish Dessert

CHOCOLATE STICKY CAKE

(kladdkaka)

INGREDIENTSChocolateSticky-

½ cup butter
2 eggs
1¼ cups sugar
½ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
½ cup flour
½ tablespoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon confectionery sugar
no-stick spray

SPECIAL UTENSIL

9″ round cake pan or baking dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Melt butter in small saucepan then let cool. Add eggs and sugar to mixing bowl. Mix with whisk until well blended. Add butter, cocoa powder, flour, and vanilla extract. Mix with whisk until batter is well blended.

Spray cake pan with no-stick spray. Pour batter into cake pan. Bake batter at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes or until set on top. A toothpick stuck into the cake edge’ should come out dry, but dry when stuck into the middle. Sprinkle with confectionary sugar. Smile.

And oh, this really is sticky. Not a finger food at all, unless, of course, you like sticky, chocolaty fingers. Then, by all means, go for it.

TIDBITS

1) One of my grandmothers came from Sweden. I called her, “Gramma Anna.” “Gramma Anna” is an anagram for “Anagram, man!”

2) The unabridged list of anagrams for “cake” in the known universe is: “cake.”

3) However, I’m happy to point out that there are hundreds and hundreds of anagrams for “chocolate cake.” The best anagrams for these happy words are: “Cheat cake? Loco!” “Elect Coach Oak,” “Coach look! Taco.” “Locate eco hack,” “A taco? Ole. Check,” and “Eek, Coach! A clot!”

4) Eden can be found in Sweden. Take a look. Adam and Eve got kicked out of the Garden of Eden for eating an apple from the Tree of Knowledge. They also became mortal and would die. And they would have to eat lutefisk to survive. We are still living with their error in judgment.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Mayan Tacos and How to Beat a Drunk-Driving Ticket

Posted on April 12, 2014 by pauldelancey

Mexican Entree

MAYAN TACOS

INGREDIENTSMayanTaco-

3 chicken breasts
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
3 cups achiote sauce
12 4-1/2″ wide corn tortillas

PREPARATION

Shred chicken breasts. Add chicken breasts and vegetable oil. Sauté chicken on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink. Stir frequently. Warm all tortillas in microwave for 30 seconds or in another skillet on low-medium heat for about 10 seconds or until warm. Add chicken equally to tortillas. Top with achiote sauce.

TIDBITS

1) Tacos is an anagram for tacos. The phrase “Mayan tacos can be found on the Mayan Coast” will help you remember this fact.

2) You may never forget the anagram and the phrase shown in tidbit 1). Indeed, you may find yourself pulled over by a traffic cop for weaving. You were only weaving because you were tired from attending a late-night lecture on the effects of heteroskedasticity on the confidence intervals of coefficients using three stage iterative least squares analysis.

3) But the traffic cop doesn’t know that. He knocks on your window. You roll it down. He says, “You know how fast you were going?” You say, “Sorry, officer, I was in a hurry to get home.” He grunts. “You were weaving out there. Been drinking much?” You shake your head. You want to say no but you blurt out, “Mayan tacos can be found on the Mayan Coast.”

4) The officer yells, “All right, get out of the car.” You get out. He handcuffs you. So convinced by your outburst of your drunkeness, he doesn’t bother to test your breath. He leads you to his patrol car. Sweat dots your forehead. “But honestly officer, I’m not drunk. I really am dead tired from trying to wrap my brain around a lecture on the effects of heteroskedasticity on the confidence intervals of coefficients using three stage iterative least squares analysis.”

5) To back up your claim, you launch into the lecture. The traffic cop’s eyes glaze over. A tsunami of tiredness crashes onto his soul. His will to live evaporates. He realizes he’ll have to listen to you spout the intricacies of empirical economies all the way back to the police station. He lets you go. You will both suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder the rest of your lives.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Pasta Sauce

Posted on March 8, 2014 by pauldelancey

Italian Appetizer

PASTA SAUCE

INGREDIENTSPastaSauce-

2 garlic cloves
2 pounds Roma tomatoes
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 teaspoon basil
1 teaspoon marjoram
1 teaspoon onion powder
1 teaspoon oregano
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon savory
1/4 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon thyme

makes 2 ½ cups

SPECIAL UTENSIL

blender

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Puree tomatoes in blender. Add remaining ingredients to large saucepan. Bring to boil on high heat, stirring constantly. Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer for about 45 minutes or until sauce thickens. Cool.

TIDBITS

1) It’s helpful to know whenever you’re at an anagram convention that pasta sauce is an anagram for: cause a spat, a cat’s pause, sautes a cap, and cue ass pat.

2) A pat is a small slice of butter. A stick of butter is much longer than a pat.

3) When German soldiers invaded the Netherlands in 1940, they confiscated the locals’ butter. Culinary historians suspect the main impetus behind Germany’s patently unpleasant wars of aggression was a massive butter shortage in the Fatherland. The Netherlands has ample stocks of butter, so it was overrun by its larger bread-spread lacking neighbor to the east.

4) Sure, Germany invaded other nations as well, but that was mainly from inertia. Once you start invading other countries, it’s kinda hard to stop. Besides, Belgium had fries, France had cheese and baguettes, and Russia had beef stroganoff.

5) Eight nations met in Toronto, Canada in 1953 to sign the Ample Butter Supply Treaty (ABS.) To remove all temptation for aggression, signatory countries pledged to main large supplies of butter. America maintains its emergency butter supply in a climate controlled cave near Butte, Montana.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Arrowroot Custard

Posted on September 2, 2013 by pauldelancey

St. Vincentian Dessert

ARROWROOT CUSTARD

INGREDIENTSArrowrootCust-

3 tablespoons arrowroot
1 tablespoon milk (3 1/2 cups more later)
3 1/2 cups milk
2/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
4 egg yolks

PREPARATION

Add arrowroot and 1 tablespoon milk to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until paste forms. Add 3 1/2 cups milk to pot. Cook milk on high heat until milk just starts bubbling. Stir CONSTANTLY. Add arrowroot paste from mixing bowl to pot and stir. Remove pot from burner. Turn heat down to low.

(Milk burns quickly. Anybody who comes by and sees you intent on boiling milk will say, “Careful, milk burns in a hurry! They cannot help it. It’s inevitable as falling asleep in the back row at a lecture for theoretical economics.)

Add sugar to pot. Mix with spoon until sugar dissolves. Return pot to burner. Simmer on low heat for 3 minutes. Remove pot from burner. Add in vanilla extract and egg yolks. Mix with whisk or fork until egg yolk blend in completely. Allow to cool. (The heat in the mix will cook the yolks enough during this time.)

Drink as much as you dare before sharing with guests. It’s really tasty.

TIDBITS

1) An anagram for “arrowroot custard” is “Coward roars, ‘Trout!’”

2) Arrowroot is a starch-rich underground creeping rhizome.

3) There was a 1964 movie called The Creeping Terror. Leonard Maltin, the film critic, gave it a “bomb” rating. His Classic Movie Guide said, “Awful horror movie, poor on every conceivable (and inconceivable) level.” I saw it. The monster looks a lot like a giant Denver omelette.

4) If that sort of horror movie can get made, why not The Creeping Rhizome? Just saying. You could have The Underground Creeping Rhizome but that would be way too scary.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Spaghetti And Meatballs

Posted on August 16, 2012 by pauldelancey

Italian Entree

SPAGHETTI AND MEATBALLS

INGREDIENTS

1 1/2 pounds of ground turkey meat
2 big garlic cloves
1 cup of sourdough bread crumbs
2 jars of spaghetti sauce
12 ounces of spaghetti

COOKING THE SPAGHETTI

Follow the instructions on your bag of spaghetti. Different sizes and types of spaghetti have different cooking instructions.

PREPARING THE MEATBALLS

This dish is relatively forgiving. If it’s too spicy, add some water or tomato sauce. If it isn’t spicy enough add some more. If it’s too “liquidy”–-“liquidy” is a legitimate cooking term–-cook the sauce a little longer. If there isn’t enough sauce add more.

Begin defrosting the turkey meat overnight. This way saves electricity and is better for the environment than defrosting by microwave. Sometimes, however, you just don’t have the time. It’s a good idea to take the meat out of the microwave and remove the defrosted outer meat. If you don’t, you will end up cooking the outer part of your block of turkey meat, making it extremely difficult to make meatballs.

Mince the garlic cloves. Take a slice of sourdough bread and make crumbs out of it. I suggest a food processor as it can make smaller crumbs than you can and it won’t get bored doing it either. Sourdough is the chosen bread in this recipe as it goes well with the garlic and spaghetti sauces.

Mix the meat, cloves, and crumbs together. Make meatballs that are at least 1 inch in diameter and less than two. Meatballs that are more than 2 inches across stand a good chance of resembling a model of the Earth–-a hard crust on the outside, gray in the middle with a reddish core.

Put the meatballs in the pan. Actually, this recipe will make two pans worth, giving a huge, delicious meal or wonderful leftovers that your kids will eat the next day before you get up.

Cook on medium heat. Gradually add spaghetti sauce until the medium balls are covered. Reduce heat to low and cover. You won’t have to turn over the meatballs more than a few times as the sauce atop will keep the moisture in.

You’re ready with your sauce at this point. However, if your noodles are not, if you can’t get your kids to log off Wizard 101 or if your sweetheart is in the middle of a Wii Fit session, it is an extremely good idea to set the heat to warm at most or even shut it off. Stir occasionally and gnash your teeth. Your anger will evaporate with the compliments your hungry brood or guests will give you for this meal.

TIDBITS

1) Pasta was eaten by the Chinese seven-thousand years ago.

2) Cortez brought tomatoes back to Spain from Mexico in 1519. So his conquest of Mexico, while bad for the Aztecs, was a positive boon for the culinary world. No tomato sauces for spaghetti noodles for 5,500 years! Ugh.

3)Pasta was not brought back from China by Marco Polo. Ancient Romans ate this food as well. Dang, yet another example of how boring history can be.

4) Pasta was considered to be peasant food by Italian nobility until around the 19th century.

5) Pasta is an anagram for “pa sat.”

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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