Posts Tagged With: hunks

You Need to See an Island Getaway

Posted on January 10, 2022 by pauldelancey

Life is stressful. Sometimes the stress can overwhelm us. We need to plant a happy, peaceful image in our mind. Something that reminds us that blissful serenity still exists in our hectic world. Look at the picture below. Picture yourself in your own little hut, cut off from the hustle and bustle of city. Gaze on the clear, blue water. Picture your cares being washed away as you wade into the lagoon. The mostly clear, blue sky reminds us that for the moment, our cares are in the distance. And even those small clouds shall soon blow away.

Relax. Enjoy. Refresh.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: you need to see | Tags: apocalyptic, blue water, Chef Paul, clouds, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, good food, happy, hectic, hunks, lagoon, life, Lutheran, murders, Paul De Lancey, peaceful, recipes, refresh, relax, serenity, stress, thriller, you need to see | 2 Comments

Dear Mr. Chef: I Need a Simple Meal

Posted on January 9, 2022 by pauldelancey

The Ultimate Simple Meal

Dear Mr. Chef,

Cooking is too hard. Too many ingredients. Too Many Steps. What should I do?

– Phil A. Americaine in Poway, Calfornia

Dear Mr. Americaine,

May I suggest “Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity?” In times like these I often make a sandwich. They’re easy.

1. But there are so many choices to put in between the bread slices. What should I do?

A. Buy cheese. Just use cheese for the sandwich filling.

2. But what cheese should I get?

A. Buy only Swiss cheese.

3. But I don’t really care for Swiss cheese. How about another type? But they’re so many types of cheese. What do I do?

A. Buy only Swiss cheese. Do you want to risk a nervous breakdown?

4. But what about bread. They’re so many types of bread. I can never decide. What to do?

A. Forget the bread. Put your slab of Swiss cheese between two other slices of cheese

5. Are those two new slices Swiss cheese as well?

A. Yes, we are protecting your mental health.

6. What if I have only one slice of Swiss cheese? What do I do now?

A. Make your single slice of Swiss into a sandwich extraordinaire. After all what is a single piece of cheese the same thing as three pieces, but with two fewer slices?

7. Thank you, Mr. Chef.

A. You’re welcome. Bon appétit.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: bad advice, cuisine | Tags: apocalyptic, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, entree, good food, hunks, Lutheran, Mr. Chef, murders, Paul De Lancey, recipes, thriller | 1 Comment

Anafre (Bean and Cheese Dip)

Posted on January 8, 2022 by pauldelancey

Honduran Appetizer

ANAFRE
(Bean and Cheese Dip)

INGREDIENTS

½ red onion
½ teaspoon chicken broth
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 cup refried beans or red refried beans
½ teaspoon pepper
½ pound quesillo or Oaxacan cheese
3 tablespoons crema Hondureño, crema Mexicana, or sour cream
tortilla chips, unsalted if possible, for dipping

Serves 8. Takes 30 minutes.

PREPARATION

Dice red onion. Add red onion, chicken broth, and vegetable oil to large pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add refried beans and pepper. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 3 minutes and until well blended. Stir frequently

Add quesillo and crema Hondureño. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes or until cheese melts completely. Stir occasionally. Serve with tortilla chips.

TIDBITS

1) Ana Fre was a good Swede who spent some time in Honduras. My grandmother’s first name was pronounced somewhere between Ana and Annie. She went with Anna when she moved to America. You’ll notice that her first name has two ns in it, while Ana Fre’s had just one. That’s because my grandma didn’t fear an extra n. Ana Fre did fear an n. So for her, the previous sentence for her became, “Ana fear a n.”

2) Ana fear a n is, of course, an anagram for Anafre. So in a way, the name Anafre, expresses the Honduran people’s love for Ana, who came up with this dish.

3) Ana was not the first nor to fear extra ns. The Romans phrase for “fear a n” or “fear for the letter n” was “timere litteras n.” The great Julius Caesar suffered from this affliction.

4) Dr. Sigmund Freud, the great Viennese pyschoanalyst, referred to this anxiety as Buchstabe n Phobie.

5) So if you fear the letter n, or just an excessive amount of them, fret not, you are not alone. You can even be a fully functioning member of society.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: America, appetizer, cheese, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, Crema Mexicana, De Lancey, Freud, Honduran, Honduras, hunks, Julius Caesar, Lutheran, murders, Oaxacan, Paul De Lancey, quesillo, recipes, Romans, Sigmund Freud, Swede, thriller | Leave a comment

You Need to See A Girl Wearing Flowers and Holding a Butterfly

Posted on January 6, 2022 by pauldelancey

Life’s unending troubles and obstacles grind us down and make us miserable. Sometimes we even think we’ll never smile again. Perhaps we’ve even forgotten to smile. But there are things in life that make us happier just by looking at them. A happy little girl, an arrangement of flowers, and butterflies always lift our spirits. Combining these three things, as shown below, will bring a smile to your face, guaranteed. Okay, you might have to look twice, but is that so bad?

Smile Makers At Work

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: you need to see | Tags: apocalyptic, butterflies, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, flowers, hunks, little girl, Lutheran, mushrooms, Paul De Lancey, recipes, smile, thriller, troubles | 3 Comments

Beef With Chestnuts

Posted on January 5, 2022 by pauldelancey

Croatian Entree

BEEF WITH CHESTNUTS

INGREDIENTS

1 pound chestnuts
6 cups water
1 large onion
1½ pounds sirloin, tenderloin, or rump
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
½ tablespoon paprika
½ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup water

Serves 4. Takes 1 hour 20 minutes.

PREPARATION

Cut an 1″ wide “x” on both sides of each chestnut. Make the cut deep enough to cut through the shell. (This keeps the chestnut from exploding. This really can happen if you omit this step.) Add chestnuts and 6 cups water to pot. Boil on medium-high heat for 45 minutes or until chestnuts become tender, the chestnut shells start to open and become easy to peel. (This is important. A shell that isn’t easy to peel will take forever.) Remove from heat. Cover with kitchen towel. Let cool for 5 minutes. Peel chestnuts. Discard shells.

While chestnuts cook, dice onion. Cut sirloin into 1″ cubes. Add onion and oil to 2ndt pot. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add sirloin cubes, paprika, pepper, and salt. Sauté for 5 minutes or until sirloin cubes brown on all sides. Stir frequently. Add 1 cup water. Reduce heat to low. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until sirloin cubes become tender. Use slotted spoon to add chestnuts to pot with sirloin cubes. Add enough water to cover. Simmer at medium heat for 15 minutes or until chestnuts soften. Stir occasionally.

TIDBITS

1) Beef and chestnuts can only be placed next to each after both get cooked, because they tend to fight each other when they are alive. This hostility stems from the one and only beef/chestnut drive. It started in 1898 in Bend, Oregon and was to have ended in the port of New Orleans. Beef and chestnuts were ferociously desired by American troops fighting the Spanish in Cuba. But from the start, the beeves taunted the chestnut trees for their extreme slowness. This was harsh as chestnuts trees were the fasted trees around, due to their tiny feet.

2) Anyway, the chestnut trees took offense at this verbal onslaught and proclaimed they’d go no further. To show their resolve, they evolved their feet to become roots. Nowadays, you need to look for chestnuts in the stationary-nut-tree section of your supermarket. Oh, and there are no more chestnut drives. The days of the chestnutboys are long gone except in movies.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: appetizer, beef, Bend, Chef Paul, chestnusts, Comic Chef, cookbook, Croatian, Cuba, De Lancey, drive, entree, evolve, good food, hunks, Lutheran, mushrooms, New Orleans, Oregon, Paul De Lancey, recipes, Roots, Spanish, thriller | 4 Comments

Oh People, People, People

Posted on January 4, 2022 by pauldelancey

I was taken aback at the supermarket checkout to see the following cover on People Magazine. While I understand there is a lead time to get printed magazines to supermarket newsstands, I think People Magazine rather jumped the gun on this one. People Magazine is a weekly magazine. Why the heck, did they go to press about Betty White turning 100 at least 14 days early. It’s all so painful. 😥

Rest in peace, Betty. You were one of the funniest women ever. And a great champion of animals. I admired you for this and many other reasons.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: observations | Tags: animals, Betty White, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, funniest women, good food, hunks, Lutheran, Paul De Lancey, recipes, thriller | 2 Comments

Wanda Wunder Wonders About Forgotten Thoughts

Posted on January 2, 2022 by pauldelancey

Wanda Wunder wonders, “Where do your thoughts go after you’ve forgotten them?” Me too, Wanda. I can’t tell you how many absolutely brilliants ideas I’ve forgotten.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: Wanda Wunder | Tags: apocalyptic, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, forgotten, good food, hunks, Lutheran, Paul De Lancey, recipes, thriller, Wanda Wunder | Leave a comment

Fish Milanesa

Posted on January 1, 2022 by pauldelancey

Mexican Entree

FISH MILANESA

INGREDIENTS

½ red onion
2 tablespoons fresh cilantro
½ teaspoon Mexican oregano or oregano
¼ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt
2 eggs
4 cod, flounder, or halibut fillets (About 2 pounds)
⅔ cup bread crumbs
4 cups vegetable oil, more if necessary
1 avocado
2 tablespoons lemon juice
1 lemon

Serves 4. Takes 35 minutes.

PREPARATION

Mince red onion. Dice cilantro. Add oregano, pepper, and salt to mixing bowl. Stir with whisk until well mixed. Whisk eggs in separate bowl. Rub spice mix onto both sides of fillets Pat fish fillets dry with towel. Cut filets in half across their width. Brush whisked eggs onto both sides of fillet halves. Let fillets sit for 5 minutes. Press bread crumbs onto both sides of fillet halves.

Add oil to skillet. (It should be about 1″ deep.) Add as many fillet halves as possible without them touching each other. (You might to cook in batches.) Heat oil at high heat until it bubbles. Lower heat to medium. Sauté fillet halves for 3 minutes on each side, until breading turns golden brown. Add additional olive oil as needed.

Place fillet halves on paper towels to drain oil. Sprinkle with cilantro, red onion, and lemon juice. Seed avocado. Cut avocado and lemon into 4 four slices each. Put a lemon and an avocado slice alongside the fillet halves. Goes well with rice.

TIDBITS

1) The full name of the Loch Ness monster is Nesa Mila. The rest of the Mila family lives near Veracruz, Mexico. If you were to dive to a deep cave, and you knew where to find it, you’d see her name, Mila, Nesa, registered in the Births and Deaths Office of the Submaritime Department, So the Scottish people have it wrong. Her first name isn’t Nessie; it’s Nesa.. Also, the Nila family are not monsters, they’re just gigantic cod. How did these cod get so big? Genetics. Wouldn’t fishermen all over the world want to stock their fisheries with gigantic cod rather spend weeks at sea and millions of dollars on ocean-going trawlers. You betcha! This is the real reason people (read fishing companies) have expended so much effort trying to find the Loch Ness monster. In the meantime, Mexican chefs honor Nesa and her family with this entree, Fish Milanesa. Now you know.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: apocalyptic, births, Chef Paul, chefs, cod, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, entree, fish, fish Milanesa, fisheries, fishermen, good food, hunks, Lutheran, Mexican, Mexico, milanesa, Paul De Lancey, recipes, thriller, trawlers, Veracruz | 2 Comments

Iran is Niger, Only Upside Down!

Posted on December 31, 2021 by pauldelancey

Look at the following map of the world. Notice anything spooky?

Iran is Niger upside down. Look, look! Someone copied Niger (ctrl-c), flipped it vertically, and plopped it down (ctrl-v) between Turkey and Pakistan.

Niger and Iran even have the same color.

Wow.

Proof you cannot deny.

It’s so clear! It’s so clear.

Okay, maybe you’re not convinced.

Let’s compare the map of an upside down Niger with that of a right-side up Iran.

Identical. The maps don’t lie

So, the boundaries of Iran and flipped Niger are the same. But for my hypothesis to hold, Iranians must be flipped Nigeriens. Is this true? Yes. How do we know. People that are upside down will have a flag that’s turned upside down as well. Is this true? Let’s see.

Upside down Nigerien Flag Rightside up Iranian flag

But for the fact that the orange print cartridge on the upside down Nigerien flag deteriorated into red on the Iranian flag and the ink started to run out in spots on the right, the flags are identical. Proof you cannot deny.

There you have it. The land and people of Iran are identical to those of Niger, only upside down. So you only need to visit one of the countries. Remember to stand on your head and walk upside down if you travel to Iran. It is for this reason people usually choose to vacation in Niger.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: international, observations, Uncategorized | Tags: apocalyptic, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, flags, good food, hunks, Iran, Iranian, Lutheran, maps, murders, Niger, Nigien, Pakistan, Paul De Lancey, recipes, thriller, turkey, upside down, vacation | 2 Comments

Tired From Busy Day

Posted on December 28, 2021 by pauldelancey

Sorry, but there won’t a funny blog today. I spent many hours assembling Number Two Son’s university expenses. Then I spent two hours making a gourmet soup, Saoto, from Suriname. My back hurts. I’m tired. Behave yourselves while I’m recuperating.

metaphorical me

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: tired | Tags: apocalyptic, back hurts, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, De Lancey, good food, hunks, Lutheran, Number Two Son, Paul De Lancey, recipes, recuperating., saoto, Suriname, thriller, university | 2 Comments

Posts Tagged With: hunks

You Need to See an Island Getaway

Dear Mr. Chef: I Need a Simple Meal