Posts Tagged With: comic

Chocolate Cupcakes With Cream-Cheese Frosting & Sad Sack Comic

American Dessert

CHOCOLATE CUPCAKES WITH CREAM-CHEESE FROSTING

INGREDIENTSChocCup-

CUPCAKE

6 tablespoons butter
6 tablespoons confectionary sugar
3 tablespoons granular sugar
2 eggs
3 tablespoons milk
1/3 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1 cup flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa

FROSTING

1/2 cup white chocolate chips
6 ounces cream cheese

UTENSIL

cupcake pan
12 paper cups
electric beater or mixer

PREPARATION

Take butter out and let it soften. Beat eggs lightly. (They rarely ever beat you. They don’t even seem to try.) Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Put softened butter, eggs, confectionary sugar, and granular sugar in mixing bowl. Use beater set on mix until butter and sugars have blended. Add milk, chocolate chips, flour, baking powder, salt, and cocoa. Use same setting on beater to blend all the ingredients.

Spoon an equal amount of the batter into each paper cup. Put the cups onto the cupcake pan. Put cupcake pan on center rack and bake at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes or until toothpick stuck into cupcake comes out cleanly. Remove pan from oven and let cool for 15 minutes on wire rack.

Make frosting while cupcakes are cooling. Put white chocolate chips in small pot. Cook on low heat and stir constantly until all chips have melted. Remove from heat. Put cream cheese in mixing bowl. Add melted white chocolate chips. Blend with electric beater set to cream. (Some electric beaters have a “burst of power” button. It’s cool, like accelerating a FerrariTM. Well, maybe not. But a cool electric beater costs tens of thousands of dollars less.)

Spread an equal amount of the white frosting on top of cupcakes. Serve to joyous, clamoring guests.

TIDBITS

1) Chocolate comes from the Aztec word “xocolatl” meaning bitter water.

2) My spell checker does not recognize “xocolatl.” Perhaps this is fair as the Aztecs didn’t recognize what sugar could do for cocoa.

3) But the 15th century Spaniards did. So, the Spanish royalty sent conquistadors and chefs to the new land.

4) After a generation of bloody conquest of Mexico, the sugar isles of the Caribbean were safe for hot chocolate.

5) Lacking minimal amounts of No DozTM or even Red BullTM energy drinks, Napoleon carried chocolate with him on all his military campaigns.

6) Napoleon’s energized armies racked up victory after victory until his enemies starting carrying chocolate as well. Defeat for the French became certain when chocolate rich Switzerland defected from the Gallic side.

7) The world today remains in a state of precarious peace, based on equal access to chocolate for all nations.

 

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

comic

 

 

 

 

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Categories: cuisine, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Gateau A La Fleur D’oranger And Sad Sack Comic

French Dessert

GÂTEAU À LA FLEUR D’ORANGER

INGREDIENTSgateau-

1/2 teaspoon flour (1/2 teaspoon more later)
1 teaspoon butter
1/2 teaspoon brown sugar (1/2 cup more later)

1 1/2 cups flour
2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt

2 large eggs
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1/2 cup unsalted butter
1 cup milk
1 1/4 teaspoons orange flower water

1/4 cup heavy whipping cream

UTENSIL

9-inch cake pan
electric mixer
PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Sprinkle 1/2 teaspoon of flour along the sides and bottom of cake pan. Do the same with a teaspoon of butter. Sprinkle ½ teaspoon brown sugar over the flour.

Put 1 1/2 cups flour, baking powder, and salt in first mixing bowl. Mix with whisk or fork.

In second mixing bowl, beat 2 eggs, but not so much they lose their dignity. Add sugar and brown sugar. Mix with whisk. Melt 1/2 cup butter. Combine contents of second mixing bowl into first mixing bowl. Add melted butter, milk, and orange flower water. Mix with whisk or electric mixer on “cake” setting. Pour entire contents into cake pan.

Put cake pan in preheated oven and bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. Allow cake to cool before topping cake with whipping cream.

TIDBITS

1) Many American beers are 3% alcohol. A twelve-ounce can contains .36 ounces alcohol.

2) Orange extract, a fair substitute for orange flower water, is 79% alcohol. My two-ounce container contains 1.58 ounces alcohol, the same as nearly 4.4 cans of beer.

3) I’m breaking out the orange-extract. Woo hoo! Party at my place!

4) “Honestly, officer, I only had a one-ounce bottle of orange extract.”

5) The officer rolls his eyes. “Like, I never heard that before.”

6) My Mexican vanilla extract is only 1.9% alcohol. This is why it isn’t as popular at Mexican parties.

8) Consumption of cough syrup soared during the Prohibition Era. Perhaps the alcoholic content of 50% or more contributed to this surge.

9) Why didn’t Al Capone simply open orange-extract tasting centers? People would have gotten their alcohol and Chicago would have been spared a crime wave.

10) But I can’t picture him behind an apron.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

sadsack8

Categories: cuisine, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Baked Chocolate-Covered Doughnuts & Little Sad Sack Comic

American Dessert

BAKED CHOCOLATE-COVERED DOUGHNUTS

INGREDIENTSBakeCCD-

1 cup pastry flour or regular flour if not available
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons milk
2 large eggs
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
6 tablespoons creamy milk chocolate frosting
sprinkles (optional)

SPECIALTY UTENSILS

doughnut mold, or tray, for 6 doughnuts
no-stick spray.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Combine flour, sugar, baking powder and salt in medium mixing bowl until all ingredients appear to be well mixed. Add milk, eggs, and vegetable oil to another medium bowl. Blend with whisk until mixture starts to get foamy. Pour the milk mixture into the flour mixture and mix until all is combined.

Spray doughnut mold with no-stick spray. Scoop combined mixture into each dough form until half full. Put in oven and cook at 375 degrees for 10 to 12 minutes. Doughnuts should be done when they spring back when gently poked.

Remove doughnut mold from oven. Let sit for about 3 to 4 minutes. Gently pry doughnuts from mold with knife or small wooden spatula. Use wooden spatula to gently (Yes, today’s cooking word is gently) spread chocolate frosting on top half of doughnut.

(Lots of people love doughnuts. The primal drive of the caveman to pounce on a bison has nothing on the modern person’s urge to eat a doughnut. This urge is so intense that your doughnuts might get eaten before they are even coated with chocolate. That’s okay. They’re happy and you will have less to clean up.)

TIDBITS

1) So many places proclaim themselves to be “Donut Shops” that I ever open one of those stores, I will say that my doughnuts are made with “real dough.”

2) “Dough” as American slang for money dates back to 1851.

3) I’ve heard that some economists claim that the size of the doughnut hole correlates with the health of the economy. When the economy booms, more dough gets used and so the doughnut hole becomes smaller.

4) My degree is in economics and I’ve never seen such studies, not even in my wilder classes or in the most blood-stirring journals of economics.

6) The exciting Gertrude Stein once used the phrase, “the hole of the doughnut,” to describe people personalities or souls.

7) Empirical economists use multiple equations replete with Greek letters to examine hypotheses.

8) During such examinations we economists like to eat pizza. However, we never turn down a good doughnut. In this way, we are like people everywhere.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

sadsack7

Categories: cuisine, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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