Posts Tagged With: Gabonese

Mustard Chicken

Gabonese Entree

MUSTARD CHICKEN

INGREDIENTS

3 garlic cloves
2 onions
3 tablespoons olive oil
6 boneless chicken breasts or thighs
¼ cup lemon juice
½ cup Dijon mustard

Serves 6. Takes 50 minutes.

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Dice onions. Add oil to large pan. Heat oil using high heat until a tiny bit of onion will dance in the oil. Carefully add chicken breasts to pan. (You might need to cook in batches.) Sear chicken for 2 minutes on each side or until golden brown. Remove chicken and set aside. Keep oil.

Add garlic and onion to pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until garlic and onion soften. Stir frequently. Add garlic, onion, chicken, lemon juice, and Dijon mustard to pot. Mix with fork until well blended. Cover and simmer at low/medium heat for 25 minutes or until chicken is tender and no longer pink inside. Stir occasionally. Put chicken breast on each plate. Ladle mustard/onion sauce over chicken breasts. Goes quite well with rice.

TIDBITS

1) “Mustard” is an anagram for “Drums rat.” And it almost goes without saying that “chicken” is an anagram for “chicken.” So, “Mustard chicken” by an extension of logic, an anagram for “Chicken drums rat.” Indeed, “Chickens drum rat” is the first complete sentence in English. In fact, a newly discovered fresco at St. Camembert’s church, dating before 1000 AD, shows chicken pounding drums with their wings. Beneath the painting are the words, “Chickens drum ‘rats’.” And whenever farmers heard “rat” being drummed out, they rushed back and shooed off the ravenous vermin.

2) Unfortunately, English farmers never taught their chickens to drum out “Normans.” So when in 1066 Duke William of Normandy landed his army, a perplexed chicken sentry didn’t know what to do. Eventually, she drummed out “rat” to England’s king. King Harold Godwinson didn’t give a fig about rats and instead scurried north to defeat Harold Hardrada. Meanwhile, back on the southern English beaches, the Norman forces assembled unmolested into a coherent, compact army. The two forces met as Hastings. The tired English lost to the fresh Normans. Duke William became the new English king. However, William knew what a near-run thing his invasion had been. His barons went through the realm slaying every single chicken-drumming teacher. Now, no chicken knows how to drum. It’s a pity as the Chicken Drumming Festival at St. Albans was something to behold.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Gabonese Fried Bananas

Gabonese Dessert

FRIED BANANAS

INGREDIENTSFriedBananas-

8 ripe bananas
1 egg
2 tablespoons orange juice
¾ cup bread crumbs
½ cup vegetable oil
½ cup brown sugar
1 cup sour cream

SPECIAL UTENSIL

cookie sheet
no-stick spray

Makes 8 plates. Takes 35 minutes.

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Peel bananas and cut them in half along their length. Add egg and orange to mixing bowl. Blend with whisk. Coat banana halves in egg/orange juice mix. Roll coated banana halves in bread crumbs until they are completely covered.

Add vegetable oil and crumb-covered 5 or 6 banana halves to pan. Sauté on medium heat for 5 minutes or until they turn golden brown. Turn twice to ensure even browning. Spray cookie sheet with no-stick spray. Place sautéed banana halves on cookie sheet. Repeat for two more batches. Bake banana halves at 350 degrees for 5 minutes.

Put 2 baked banana halves on each plate. Top each banana half with 1 tablespoon sour cream and ½ tablespoon brown sugar.

TIDBITS

1) According to essentials facts about Gabon, the lowest points in the country are zero meters above sea level. Many people call these low points, beaches.

2) Eighty percent of all gorillas in Africa reside in Gabon, which is an anagram for No Bag,

3) Most caves in Gabon are unexplored, quite possibly because angry gorillas might be hiding in them. Why are the beasts so angry? Because, again according to essential Gabonese facts, the country is always hot and humid.

5) Heat suffering gorillas should take up zero-altitude surfing. Where would an 800-pound gorilla surf? Anywhere it wants. But then we could explore more caves. So, it’s all good.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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