I feel this way.
Introverts’ Creed
Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Yoga Instructor #9
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
I wish Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.
I wish Happy Thanksgiving to those who might end up at odds with some of the family. I have been there.
I wish Happy Thanksgiving to those who cannot be with all of their family. I have been there.
I wish Happy Thanksgiving to those who are alone. I have been there. (It’s really hard to find a restaurant that’s open today. Once, I got take away pizza.)
I wish Happy Thanksgiving to those whose efforts today are not appreciated. I have been there.
To all you people, I give you a cyber hug. You can’t feel it, but it’s there.
And now, let me wish you Happy Thanksgiving with something from Norman Rockwell.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Stir occasionally. Cover fry breads with an equal amount of this mixture. Top each covered fry breads with equals amounts of avocado, cheddar cheese, lettuce, sour cream, and 1 cup diced tomatoes.– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
The superb Selena Gomez had a big hit with great song “Good for you.”
The true lyrics include:
“I’m on my 14 carats
I’m 14 carat
Doing it up like Midas,”
I, however, heard:
“I’m on my farting carrots
I’m farting carrot
Doing it up, like my ass.”
Ms. Gomez certainly seemed to be rather earthy. She also showed herself to be rather proud of her stupendous, carrot-spawned, public farts.
Okay. Then given the exciting, alternative lyrics, the rest of the song seem to continue this rather curious vein. Oh well, each to her own taste.
But hey, I’m not too proud to admit I misheard the lyrics. Can you tell I use subtitles when I watch TV?
Misheard lyrics #15
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Since 1562 French Catholics and Protestant Hugenots had been fighting a series of bloody wars, called “The French Wars of Religion.”
In 1589, Henry IV had became the legal heir to the French throne, after King Henry III was assassinated by a fanatical Catholic monk.
Henry IV was a Huguenot. And, although most of the country accepted him as King, many Catholics, especially those in the essential city of Paris, refused to recognize his authority
Henry solved the political and religious impasse by converting to Catholicism and by this act was allowed to enter Pairs. Legend has it that he told a friend “Paris vaut une messe.” (“Paris is worth a mass.”)
I was taking notes in college on this event. I wrote down, “Paris is worth an ass.” I friend of mine saw my notes and laughed and laughed and laughed. For I had changed the story’s meaning somewhat.
But I stand by what I had honestly heard, Paris really is worth an ass.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
I was cursing at my printer when Shazzam! someone looking a lot like myself and dressed pretty much the same materialized to my left.
“What ho,” I said, “you look like me. Am I besides myself?”
“Hee, hee,” he said, “I see what you did there. In fact, I am you from the future. I’ve come to let you know what might happen to you, so you can prepare.”
I asked, “How far into the future?”
“Ten minutes.”
I shrugged. “Anyway, can you fix this fecking piece of crap computer?”
“No,” said future me (FM), “Printers hate me, will hate you, as much as they hate you now?”
I flipped off the printer. “You stinking lutefisk.”
“Indeed.”
I hung my head. “Life is hard.”
FM put a hand on my shoulder. Let’s say it was his right hand on my left shoulder. It could have been his left hand on my right shoulder. There’s a lot of freedom in the first draft.
While we waited for my blog self to stop ruminating, I tried cancelling the print order by all things, pressing the stop-printing thingy. It would not cancel. We tried going to POS 2000 printer icon on the desk top and clicking on stop print job. Bloody feck! Nothing happened. We tried turning the computer on and off. The printer remained frozen. We unplugged the printer and made a brief sacrifice to a Mayan monkey god. Then FM plugged in the computer and rebooted. We managed to cancel the print job.
The printer peformed a number of noisy incantations to its evil master and spat a test page.
I looked at my future self and said, “It’s crunch time” as I clicked on print.
And then the familiar sound of a big wheeler downshifting on a steep infected the air around us as a page crumpled to its death.
We stared at each other and said, “I fecking hate printers.”
Synapses fired as I finally realized the full import of having future coming to visit. Coming to import life changing information.
“So,” I said, “What did come back in time to tell me?”
“Present Paul,” he said, “I braved temporal eddies to say . . .”
Beep! Poof! And like that he was gone. His ten minutes were up.
That’s the last time I time travel.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
I was cursing at my printer when Shazzam! someone looking a lot like myself and dressed pretty much the same materialized to my left.
“What ho,” I said, “you look like me. Am I besides myself?”
“Hee, hee,” he said, “I see what you did there. In fact, I am you from the future. I’ve come to let you know what might happen to you, so you can prepare.”
I asked, “How far into the future?”
“Ten minutes.”
I shrugged. “Anyway, can you fix this fecking piece of crap computer?”
“No,” said future me (FM), “Printers hate me, will hate you, as much as they hate you now?”
I flipped off the printer. “You stinking lutefisk.”
“Indeed.”
I hung my head. “Life is hard.”
FM put a hand on my shoulder. Let’s say it was his right hand on my left shoulder. It could have been his left hand on my right shoulder. There’s a lot of freedom in the first draft.
While we waited for my blog self to stop ruminating, I tried cancelling the print order by all things, pressing the stop-printing thingy. It would not cancel. We tried going to POS 2000 printer icon on the desk top and clicking on stop print job. Bloody feck! Nothing happened. We tried turning the computer on and off. The printer remained frozen. We unplugged the printer and made a brief sacrifice to a Mayan monkey god. Then FM plugged in the computer and rebooted. We managed to cancel the print job.
The printer peformed a number of noisy incantations to its evil master and spat a test page.
I looked at my future self and said, “It’s crunch time” as I clicked on print.
And then the familiar sound of a big wheeler downshifting on a steep infected the air around us as a page crumpled to its death.
We stared at each other and said, “I fecking hate printers.”
Synapses fired as I finally realized the full import of having future coming to visit. Coming to import life changing information.
“So,” I said, “What did come back in time to tell me?”
“Present Paul,” he said, “I braved temporal eddies to say . . .”
Beep! Poof! And like that he was gone. His ten minutes were up.
That’s the last time I time travel.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
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