Posts Tagged With: Paul R. De Lancey

Be an Author in the e-book Anthology, “The Darwin Murders”

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey cordially invite you to contribute a short story to the Kindle e-book anthology, “The Darwin Murders.” This event takes place July 20 on Facebook.

1) We are looking for murder or accidental murder stories where humanity benefits from the offing of a certain type of individual. Examples are telemarketers, Windows 8 DarwinCoverexecutives, etc. You decide. No real people to be offed, in real life or fictionally for goodness sake.

2) One submission of 250 words or fewer.

3) Submit with title, author name, and indicate permission to publish.  Please provide two sentence bio. If desired, one or two of the sentences may include links to the author’s sites.

4) We strongly encourage submissions on the date of the event. Submissions on other dates will be allowed but we cannot promise inclusion from those other dates. We might already be going to press or we might just miss it.

5) There will be five well publicized dates when this e-book will be offered for free.

6) Two winners will be honored by mention on Candace C. Bowen’s and Paul R. De Lancey’s web sites, Facebook, and Paul’s blog, and any other way our harried brains can think up.

Let the brainstorming begin.

– Paul De Lancey, co-editor

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

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My Cookbook, “Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World” is Available in Paperback and as an E-book

Woo hoo! My international cookbook, Eat Me, 169 Fun Recipes From Around the World, is out.

On Amazon: paperback and e-book

On Nook: e-book

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PRAISE FOR EAT ME

“Paul De Lancey’s cookbook, Eat Me! 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World is as hysterical as it is chock-full of yummy recipes and wacky trivia.

“From the author of We’re French and You’re Not and The Fur West, De Lancey entertains supreme as he distills cooking to the simplest of terms—from boiling water (and identifying the stove) to preparing timeless classics from every corner of the globe including scrumptious Beef Stroganoff and Greek Wraps with tzatziki sauce.

“Every recipe is followed by hilarious tidbits, such as, ‘King Louis XV ate boiled eggs every Sunday. This practice ceased with his death.’ And advice galore, Crunchy Tuna Casserole – ‘This is not a good meal to make if your dishwasher doesn’t work as happened to me. Grr!’

“De Lancey is one of the freshest voices in the cookbook world. He will have your family and guests spewing milk from their noses as you read about the perils of dropping raw eggs from too great a height into hot Tomato Drop Soup.

Eat Me! is a must read for anyone with a sense of humor and a desire to expand their menu.”
– Marie Etienne, author of Storkbites: A Memoir and Confessions of a Bi-Polar Mardi Gras Queen

“What’s up with straightforward, no-nonsense cookbooks? A little nonsense in the kitchen can make meal preparation more fun. That’s what Paul De Lancey does in Eat Me, a cookbook spiced with comedy, leavened with silliness, and still fully informative and functional. So get out those pots and pans and your sense of humor and have some fun creating that next meal.”

—Roger L. Conlee, author of Fog and Darkness and The Hindenburg Letter.

“I don’t cook, my favorite dinner is popcorn and M&Ms and I store my sweaters in the oven, but Paul De Lancey’s new cookbook may change all that. From what I’ve seen of his recipes and accompanying photos, this cook knows his ingredients.”

-Judy Reeves, author of A Writer’s Book of Days

Eat Me by Paul De Lancey is the only way I know of to learn how to cook simple yummy meals while laughing too hard to eat your simple yummy meals. Seriously. This author’s recipes are so inextricably layered with absurdity, puns, and outrageous assertions that I never knew whether I was chuckling at his jokes or cooking them up myself. A great, side-tickling–and practical–read for anyone’s kitchen!”

– Reina Lisa Menasche, author of Twice Begun

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bump Off Your Enemies Anthology Is Available

Nearly fifty of the world’s finest authors contributed to Bump Off Your Enemies.
Available on Amazon Kindle. Free days are May 5, May 12, May 18, May 19, and May 26.
Oh, this is a work of fiction.

http://www.amazon.com/Bump-Off-Your-Enemies-ebook/dp/B00CJWAVAQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1367249448&sr=8-1&keywords=bump+off+your+enemies

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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I Will Be The Next El Presidente Of Venezuela

I am officially announcing my candidacy for the presidency of Venezuela. I am particularly concerned that my main contender–the name escapes me–has been disturbingly mute about protecting the glorious Venezuelan hot dog.  I, however, have made a Venezuelan hot dog, wrote up the recipe, and blogged to the world about it . My friends, the choice is clear. vote for me and the Bacon & Chocolate Party.

As they say in Venezuela, where they speak Spanish:

“Vote tocino y chocolate para una Mañana sabrosa.”*

– Paul R. De Lancey

* = pretty sure that’s translated correctly.

 

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

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Terri Lynn Coop, Winner of Bump Off Your Enemies Literary Event

In the Bump Off Your Enemies Literary Event,I am pleased to announce winner number two of two.terricoo

Please join with me in congratulating Terri for
her submission; IT’S NOT EASY BEING GREEN.

By: Terri Lynn Coop

‘It’s not easy being green…’

The refrain from the old Muppets tune ran through my head as I stirred the lime jello.
I hate this fucking stuff. Ten years of unholy hell masquerading as holy matrimony. I could stand the arguments. The boredom. The never-ending laundry. However, by far, the worst of it was his insistence on lime jello every Sunday. Said it reminded him of his mother. Never red. Never orange. Once I substituted blue and he sulked for three days. Always green. And always in molds. As if I didn’t have enough to do.

Well, tonight I changed up mom’s recipe just a bit. In each of those putrid jiggling four-leaf clovers was a little surprise.
I didn’t know Visine was deadly until I saw an episode of “America’s Most Interesting Poisons.” The cable channels are so educational.
Squeeze. Drip. Squeeze. Drip. Squeeze. Drip.

As I got to the last hollow in the mold, a new song appeared in my head.

‘I can see clearly now…’
✍ ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍
Terri Lynn Coop manages emergencies by day, writes by night, and is an unapologetic geek the rest of the time. She has been known to blog at http://readinrittinrhetoric.blogspot.com/

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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*Bump Off Your Enemies* Ebook Anthology Will Soon Be Released

bumpcov

Categories: book reviews and excerpts, humor | Tags: , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Sale! Sale! Sale On Corporate Sponsorships For *Bump Off Your Enemies* Literary Event

I had previously stated that corporate sponsorships of the *Bump Off Your Enemies* literary events must be $100,000. However, with the economy’s recovery from the Great Recession being wobbly at best and companies spending their excess cash on investment  we’ve received few, read zero, corporate sponsorships.

So for today only, corporate sponsorships for this great event can be had for the quite reasonable amount of $1.98.

Undertakers, this is a natural event to sponsor.

Join the *Bump Off Your Enemies* tsunami.

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey invite you to fictionally “Bump Off” your enemies in 200 words or fewer.gunsight

Enemies do not have to be specific people. They can be types of people such as telemarketers or people who block aisles in supermarkets. Two winners will be crowned Kingpin/Queenpin. Winning entries with a short bio of the winners will be posted on Facebook, Paul De Lancey’s blogsite (www.pauldelancey.com), his website (www.lordsoffun.com), and Candace C. Bowen’s website (www.knightseries.com). Good Luck!

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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First Anniversary of My Blog

Thank you to everyone from all over the world who follow my blog. You’re wonderful.

– Paul R. De Lancey

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: humor | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

*Bump Off Your Enemies* Fictional Writing Contest – Update

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey invite you to fictionally “Bump Off” your enemies in 200 words or fewer.  Please visit the event “Bump Off Your Enemies” on Facebook on March 15. Two winners will be crowned Kingpin/Queenpin. Winning entries will be posted. Good Luck!

I’d like to stress you must fictionally kill off your characters. Candace and I will look askance at anyone killing someone and describing what actually happened. That is so wrong. This is an exercise in imagination. Enemies do not have to be specific people. They can be types of people such as telemarketers or people who block aisles in supermarkets.

You may post your Facebook entry before March 15 but you run the risk of us not seeing it when judge on that date. My brain is particularly wobbly. Speaking of brains, zombies do not count unless you kill them in your entry. After that they may turn into the undead or not as you see fit.

The following should theoretically get you to the event, but most likely you’ll have to sign onto Facebook first. Probably you’ll find yourself at the lists of events page, why Facebook why? Now Ctrl-v this link again or type in “Bump Off Your Enemies” and you will be taken to this glorious event. Negotiations will soon be underway between this event and Facebook for easier access.

https://www.facebook.com/events/501973503178459/

gunsightoutline

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“Bump Off Your Enemies” Fictional Contest

Authors Candace C. Bowen and Paul R. De Lancey invite you to fictionally “Bump Off” your enemies in 200 words or fewer.  Please visit the event “Bump Off Your Enemies” on Facebook on March 15. Two winners will be crowned Kingpin/Queenpin. Winning entries will be posted. Good Luck!

I’d like to stress you must fictionally kill off your characters. Candace and I will look askance at anyone killing someone and describing what actually happened. That is so wrong. This is an exercise in imagination.

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Photo by Candace C. Bowen

 

 

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: book reviews and excerpts, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

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