Posts Tagged With: apocalyptic

Japanese Steak Bowl

Japanese Entree

STEAK BOWL

INGREDIENTS

1⅓ cups rice
2⅔ cups beef broth
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 pound sirloin steak or New York strip steak
1 tablespoon vegetable oil (1 tablespoon more later)
2 tablespoons butter
2 garlic cloves
1 small onion
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
½ tablespoon mirin or sake
3 tablespoons soy sauce
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
1 tablespoon fresh parsley

SPECIAL UTENSILS

rice cooker
mandoline

Serves 4. Takes 45 minutes.

PREPARATION

Add rice and beef broth to rice cooker. Cook rice and beef broth according to instructions that come with rice cooker or on rice package . While rice cooks, rub pepper onto steak. Add steak and 1 tablespoon oil to pan. Cook steak over high heat for 7-to-14 minutes depending on your desired level of doneness. (Steaks resist pressure from a finger ever more as they go from raw to medium well.) Flip 4 times to ensure even cooking. Add butter. Flip steak until it is evenly coated with butter. Cook for 1 minute. Cut steak into ¼” thick slices.

While steak cooks, mince garlic cloves. Use mandoline or knife to onion into slices ⅛” thick. Add garlic, onion, and 1 tablespoon oil to pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens.

While rice and steak cook, add mirin, soy sauce, and Worcestershire sauce to mixing bowl. Stir with whisk or fork until well blended. Dice parsley. Divide rice equally into serving bowls. Ladle sauce from mixing bowl over rice. Garnish rice with parsley. Carefully add beef strip/onion mixture onto rice. Enjoy.

TIDBITS

1) Steaks can’t bowl as they’ve no athletic ability. But they can be served in a bowl like in this dish.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, international, observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

You Need to See Three Dogs on a Motorcycle

 

 

These three dogs say, “Hi” and invite you to go on a road trip with them. Go ahead. You know you want to.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: you need to see | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Presidential Inauguration

Wouldn’t this make you laugh?

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: extended warranty | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

We Are Calling You

Surely, this has happened.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: humor, observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Fun Festivals – Ant Nest Sitting

Finland hosts Ant Nest Sitting Competitions. Athletes–whom am I kidding?–sit on an ant hill for as long as they can stand the ant bites. This competition is held all over the country during the summer months. It truly helps to have a high threshold for pain or an ass harder than bronze. Okay, I find this competition to be weird, but there are those who love it.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: fun festivals, things to see and do | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Why Editors Are Important, #1

Understanding foreign languages can be quite difficult. So, it’s probably a good thing to hire an editor who knows multiple languages.

 

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: editors | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Fun Festivals – Accordion Extravaganza!

 

Next year, sir, next year

Clear your musical palate by attending the Accordion Extravaganza! in Edmonton, Alberta. Pop in on all sorts of concerts, workshops, dances, and competitions, all featuring the accordion. Accordion lovers will melt in ecstasy here.

Oh no, the extravaganza has been put on indefinite hold because of Covid-19 restrictions. While I applaud the organizers’ concern for our safety, I think our world has just gotten a little grayer. I know of least one other accordion festival being canceled. I’m aware, though, of an online accordion celebration. I’m happy for that, but really there’s nothing really like enjoying an according in person.

Here’s to the Accordion Extravaganza! being held next year!

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

Categories: fun festivals, things to see and do | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Spanish Almond Sherry Soup – New Tidbits

Spanish Soup

ALMOND SHERRY SOUP

INGREDIENTS

1 onion
2½ tablespoons butter
15 saffron threads
¼ pound blanched or slivered almonds
2 eggs yolks
3 cups chicken stock
3 tablespoons sherry
¼ teaspoon nutmeg
⅛ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon Spanish paprika or paprika
½ cup cream
2 teaspoons slivered almonds
2 tablespoons fresh parsley

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder or food processor

Serves 5. Takes 1 hour.

PREPARATION

Mince onion. Melt butter in pan using low-medium heat. Add onion. Simmer at low-medium heat for 8 minutes or until onion softens and turns yellow. Stir frequently. Add saffron. Simmer at low-medium heat for 3 minutes. Stir occasionally.

Add blanched almonds to pan. Toast by using medium-high heat until almonds start to brown. Grind toasted almonds until they become a paste. Add almond paste, egg yolks, and minced onion to mixing bowl. Mix with fork until you a well blended almond/egg/onion paste.

Add chicken stock, sherry, nutmeg, pepper, salt, and Spanish paprika to pot. Bring to boil using high heat. Stir occasionally. Reduce heat to low-medium and add cream. Gradually add almond/egg/onion paste. Stir until well blended. Simmer at low-medium heat for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. While soup simmers, mince parsley. Garnish soup with slivered almonds and parsley.

TIDBITS

1) There have been documented instances of  the heavens raining fish. This sounds pretty exciting, especially if I needed an expensive fish for a gourmet meal and the nearest supermarket that carries it is an hour away. I would like it even better if the clouds rained Almond Sherry Soup. Well, why not? I’d be out their with buckets, I can tell you. Wear a raincoat.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I Simplify the Federal Income Tax Form

I hate paying taxes. Everybody does. I do, however, realize we need taxes to pay for many necessary things such as the military and infrastructure. No, what really gets my goat is that frigging complicated tax form. With all the schedules that go along with the main page, a taxpayer could easily fill out over 30 pages. You’ll need to hire a tax preparer. That’ll run you hundreds of dollars. And that’s after spending three days assembling all the information. What makes it even more horrible is that the IRS scans all the returns looking for mistakes.

Looking for mistakes. Let that sink in. That means they already have the numbers you need to type in on the forms. And they will tell you when they think–no, when they now–you are wrong. What can be done to fix all this madness and frustration?

I’m glad you asked. Let the IRS do your taxes for you, They know what they want on your forms, schedules, and attachments anyway. I hereby propose a new and quite simple form to replace all the tree-devouring pages you used to submit.

It’s called the 1040-P. (P stands for Paul, me. I created this glorious, time saving, liberating page. I deserve some recognition.)

Anyway, I give you the 1040-P

 

I see a Nobel prize in my future.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

 

Categories: I simplify | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Things I Want in a Cell Phone

All it did was work

I just want my cell phone to work. I want it to work every time. I don’t care for the fancy gizmos the manufacturers insist on adding to each new version of their phones. Every time they improve their product, the phone becomes more and more likely to freeze, breakdown, and bust completely. I call such destructive improvement “Death by Enhancement.” I would be  happy beyond measure, if some company manufactured a simple, reliable cell phone. I shall hold my breath until this happens.

Things I Want in a Cell Phone.

1*) It makes phone calls only when I want.

2*) It never, ever, ever, by itself, turns off the ringer volume down to zero and vibrate only. I don’t care if my cell phone lowers the ringtone level to zero when it bumps against my leg when I carry it in my pants pocket. The cell phone should be designed so that cannot happen.

I definitely do not want the cell phone to turn off the ringtone by itself or activates the do not disturb feature all by itself. What the hell? This has happened to me. This has happened to others, especially lately. I’ve missed important calls because of all of this.

3) The icons on the phone always work when pressed.

4) Texting is easy. This is mostly the case with phones.

5) I don’t want to be blamed for pressing the wrong button, or icon, accidently. The cell phone should be designed against this.

6*) I doesn’t produce random ringtones at 3 am. I suppose the manufacture try to make up for the all the muted calls during the day.

7) Easy to use GPS. This is usually true for cell phones.

* Times where the old rotary phones outperformed the modern cell phone. Heck, instances where my grandmothers’ phone from over a century ago did better.

Well, this is my dream. More power to those who aren’t bothered by any of this.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: fun festivals, observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

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