Posts Tagged With: apocalyptic

Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Phrases: Trash Read and Retrash Read.

Posted on October 12, 2024 by pauldelancey

How many thousands of times has this happened to you? You take a frozen package out of the freezer. You take the food out of the package. You then throw the packaging into the trash bin. Oops. You haven’t read the instructions, have you?

So, you fish the package out of the trash bin. And you leave it until you’ve followed all the instructions.

We need phrases for both these scenarios.

And now there are:

TODAY’S AWESOME PHRASES

Trash Read and Retrash Read

Awesome entry #49

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Inigo Montoya on Trafic Etiquette

Posted on October 9, 2024 by pauldelancey

I feel Inigo Montoya’s pain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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The Law of Formatting

Posted on October 6, 2024 by pauldelancey

I came up with the following law after many,  many mano-a-mano bouts with formatting software.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: wise words | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Minnie Mouse Latch Hook Project – Part 1

Posted on October 4, 2024 by pauldelancey

I finished my Charlie Brown latch hook project, but with illnesses, doctor visits, and plate tectonics I’ve delayed starting a new project.

But no longer.

But first, two days I brought the mounted Charlie Brown(tm) latch hook to the crafts class. A librarian saw me holding it and took a picture. My project and I will be in a forthcoming county newsletter. Two other crafters took pictures as well. It all made me feel special and I was dearly needing a pick me up.

I’m taking over a friend’s barely started latch hook of Minnie Mouse(tm). It’s a little harder as the thread is somewhat thicker,

Anyway, here is my start.

Minnie Mouse – 10/04/2024

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Life Tips & Tricks – Challenges

Posted on September 30, 2024 by pauldelancey

The following is especially true in cooking, or so a friend told me.

Life Tip and Trick #1

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Printers Are Evil

Posted on September 23, 2024 by pauldelancey

All it did was work all the time

Well they are. Somehow, a while back, they achieved consciousness and developed an instant and ferocious hatred of us.

Today’s onslaught of printer malevolence: Taking one hour to print one page.

Time to bring back the 1941 Royal typewriter.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: face of evil, printers, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Unleash the Hounds of Hell

Posted on September 14, 2024 by pauldelancey

Although known as the serenest of men, my patience is not infinite. The enemy: the indoor fly. Indeed,

 

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: apocalyptic, face of evil | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

A Fine Outcome

Posted on September 5, 2024 by pauldelancey
Farine du Ble sat down. She spent all day cleaning that room. What for? No one ever used it. Still she tidied. Her muscles ached. Now it was time for reading. She openned her book, Dress Patterns and the Women Who Made Them. She soon imagined herself making fancy dresses for the First Lady. Little by little she drifted from day dreaming to dreaming.
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A few hours later, bricklayers sealed off the room; apparently someone else thought the room to be useless. She noticed not. Farine’s tired muscles ensured that only the dead would wake her. Which they did as soon as she had used up the oxygen.
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And now they’ve found her; her book still open. One of her descendants has a gigantic library fine waiting for him.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

What I Did Today

Posted on August 26, 2024 by pauldelancey

Liechtenstein, a tough nut to crack

After much internal debate, I got out of bed, showered, and got dressed. Look at me, all adulty and everything.

Poked around my finances instead of taking to the street and fomenting revolution.

Make an appointment to have my ears looked at.

When shopping at the supermarket. I was planning to make a two course meal.

I decided instead to invade Leichtenstein. It did not got well.

Me: Yo ho, I’m invading your country. I’m going to rule your country.

Border Guard: No you’re not. I’ll stop you.

Me: You and what army?

Border Guard blows whistle. Three burly sorts run up to me.

Border Guard: Me and the Leichtensteinan army.

Me: Aw, man.

Border Guard: Shoo. Shoo.

So, I went home, dejected and tired. I jettisoned plans to make Cilbir (Turkish eggs with yogurt.) and made Powegian Pastrami Pepperoni wraps instead.

I’ve had a couple glasses of chocolate glasses since then and am feeling more upbeat.

I hope you behaved yourselves while I was careening around Europe.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Start for Possible New Novel

Posted on August 23, 2024 by pauldelancey

HARALD THE AXE MURDERER
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Harald, the axe murderer, harbored a dark secret. No, it wasn’t that he was an introvert, although he did find the world a little peoply. However Harald, being a rather focused and proactive sort did all he could to bring that annoyance to manageable proportions.
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No, I don’t yet know his dark secret. I only learned of his existence about a half hour ago while making pasta for dinner. I can tell you, though, that I used penne pasta, Italian seasoning, garlic-pepper salt, Fontina cheese, Roma tomatoes, and onion.
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Perhaps I will eventually tell you about the workings of Harald’s mind in similar detail. But as of now, no. We’ve just met and we haven’t learned to trust each other. Also, he wields an axe expertly and I can place a fire breathing dragon in the bathroom when he gets up at 3 am to pee.
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And now, on to his adventures, we don’t want to keep him waiting.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Harald the Axe Murderer | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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