Don’t delay! Turn your life around. Do this today.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
How many times has this happened to you?
You’re late to:
1) Meet the love of your life at a super fancy restaurant. You’re going to propose to her.
2) An interview for your dream job.
3) A meeting with a hostile foreign ambassador. You’re hoping to avoid global armageddon.
But none of these things happen. You spent an hour looking for your care keys.
1) You love leaves the restaurant before you arrive, vowing to hate you forever.
2) Your would be boss gives the position to a lutefisk vendor because no other applicants showed up.
3) You thought that the stand up ambassador would relay the unforgivable insult to his country. The almost certain missiles never get launched against you beloved country, only because the foreign ambassador couldn’t find his car keys either. But it was a near run thing.
Face it, you’re disorganized. The keys you placed on the hook devoted to them fall to the floor. Or you put the keys down, well you can’t remember where. Then use put some papers on top of them. Now you have no chance to find them.
What to do? Simply buy Bushell’s Model 303 Household Balloon. Simply attach your keys to the little hook beneath the ballon. When you want to find your car keys, simply look up. It’s that easy. You’ll say, “Thank you, Bushnell.”
Or splurge for the enhanced model, the Bushnell Model 303E Household Balloon. The battery powered 303E will follow you as you move from room to room. Your keys will always be right above your head.
So get yourself a 303. You’ll never have to worry starting World War III ever again. Heck, you might even get married.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
It’s sad that the following needs to be said over and over again.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
I was twice misdiagnosed as not having Covid. For two weeks. Because the first two urgent cares wouldn’t test for Covid. When I had a sever cold. When I was coughing up lots of phlegm. I had no temperature, so I couldn’t have cough. So, I had Covid for three weeks instead of one. At my worst, I coughed up big gobs of green phlegm about every fifteen minutes. For 72 hours straight. No real sleep. Just a few minutes of light for about eight minutes between coughing fits. Grr.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
How many times has this happened to you? You’re working at home in your pajamas when suddenly, due to no fault of your own, you find yourself compelled to venture out into the peoply world. You don’t want to change out of your pjs. They’re comfortable as all get out. Besides your Batman and Robin on-surfboard pajamas look cool. Ever so cool. But you know that if you wear this sleepware, uncouth hoi polloi will point, snicker, and even laugh at you.
Who needs such grief? Indeed, Carl La Fong expresses the fervent desired nurtured in the bossom of everyone.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
“Iggy, piggy, poo”
“Iggy, piggy, poo.”
You just gotta.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
We get stressed. We have too many responsibilities. Too many things to ponder. Our mind gets pulled in more and more directions and all at once. We find ourselves performing ever shallower analysis on our projects. We shun contact with the people around us. No time.
Our brain’s ability to function decreases all the time. We have forgotten there’s no “function” without “fun.” Of course, we also can’t “function” without “ction,” but that’s a subject for a future blog.
Anyway, our minds cry to the heavens for some rest, some time off to recalibrate.
How do we do that? As they say in internet technology, “Have you tried turning it off and on again?”
We will turn off our minds. We’ll do that by thinking of nothing. Nothing. Like what is shown in the rectangle below. Look inside it.
Nothing
If you still have troubling clearing your mind, try again while chanting, “Iggy piggy poo” over and again. You’ll be amazed how much more revitalized you will feel.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
You gave it your best, but your best wasn’t quite good enough to back the forces of evil that beset your person. Sure, you almost won out, but that wasn’t quite good enough. You lost out to the universe’s forces by just an itty, bitty, teeny, weeny bit.
Where can you get an itty, bitty, teeny, weeny equalizer?
Look below at Bettie the Baby Chick. She’s badbass and will relentlessy peck your enemies’s ankles.
You say that Bettie can’t do much. But you need only an itty, bitty, teeny, weeny bit of help and Badass Bettie can certainly do that.
Hire Bettie, she’s your equalizer.
Have Beak, Will Travel
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Dear Readers,
I wish peace, prosperity, and all the best for you.
Iggy piggy poo
Emperor La Fong’s favorite castle
It’s easy! Simply share this blog to a few people and you will be given absolute power over some tiny nation. But wait, there’s more. The size of your dominion increases with the number of shares. What are you waiting for? Share now and rule.
“I shared this blog only twice and now I’m the Emperor of Liechtenstein.”
— Carl La Fong
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
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