Monthly Archives: June 2023

Tomato Pie

Posted on June 20, 2023 by pauldelancey

American Entree

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TOMATO PIE

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INGREDIENTS­
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1 tablespoon fresh basil
1½ tablespoons fresh dill
3 green onions
1½ tablespoons fresh oregano
1 tablespoon fresh parsley
2½ pounds tomatoes
½ tablespoon salt
¾ cup mayonnaise
¾ cup shredded mozzarella cheese
¾ cup shredded Parmesan cheese
1 9″ pie shell
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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mandoline (optional)
aluminum foil
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Serves 4. Takes 1 hour 20 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Preheat oven to 360 degrees, Dice basil, dill, green onions, oregano, and parsley. Use mandoline or knife to Slice tomatoes into slices ¼”-thick slices with mandoline or knife. Place tomato slices 1-layer deep on paper towels. Sprinkle slices with salt. Place paper towels on tomatoes. Pat tomatoes dry. Let sit 15 minutes. Pat tomato slices dry again with new paper towels. Add mozzarella and Parmesan cheeses, basil, dill, green onion, oregano, and mayonnaise to mixing bowl. Mix with fork or whisk until well blended.
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Arrange ⅓ of the tomato slices over the pie crest. Spread ½ of the cheese/mayonnaise mixture over the tomato slices. Repeat. Arrange last layer of tomato slices over the 2nd cheese/ mayonnaise layer. Press these slices firmly into the cheese/mayonnaise. (This makes the layers come together.) Wrap only the edges of crust with tin foil to prevent the crust from browning excessively.
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Bake at 360 degrees for 35 minutes or until the mayonnaise/cheese mixture turns golden brown and begins to bubble. Garnish with parsley.
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TIDBITS
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1) Lucy of Olduvai Gorge had a brother called Tomato. His skeleton has yet to be discovered. That’s why know so little of him. While most homonids were content to be hunter-gathers, Tomato developed the tomato by careful cross pollination. He then scattered tomato seeds along his way to North and South America. It’s only fitting that we named the tomato after him.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Chatting With Chefs, cuisine, history | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Word: Tidyfinding

Posted on June 19, 2023 by pauldelancey

The surest way to lose something is to misplace it. Then put something else on top of it You can’t see the thing you want to find because it’s covered. You don’t even know where to start looking as you weren’t paying attention when you put it down. Where did it go? The only way to find it is to clean house until you see it. If you discover it early in your cleaning then, hurray, you’ll have time for other projects. If however, you have to tidy up for hours, then you’ll gain a home that’s will sparkle with cleanliness. King Charles III will be proud to accept your invitation. It’s a win-win situation. But we don’t have a word to describe this process.

It’s high time to correct this oversight.

TODAY’S AWESOME WORD

tidyfinding

Awesome entry #13

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Soaphenge

Posted on June 18, 2023 by pauldelancey

Everyone knows about Stonehenge. It looks way cool. We wonder how it was constructed.

Not all henges were made of stone. Some were made of wood as in the not quite as famous Woodhenge. All henges are circular or ovalar. (Note, ovalar means to be shaped like an oval and is not at all like “ovular” which has to do with “ovum,” “ovulating,” and other similar words. Stonehenge was not built to track Queen Mahb’s menstrual cycles.)

Anyway, what was the purpose of these henges?

Many people hold the reason for Stonehenge was to track the movement of the Sun and the seasons. It certainly does that. However, other theories abound. Most likely henges were ancient burial grounds or a place for complex rituals and ceremonies designed to honor the dead. If in England, you really should visit Stonehenge and the other henges.

However, traveling to Stonehenge is time consuming and expensive if you live in America. Especially if you live in California?  What do you do then?

May I suggest taking a trip to Poway, California to see its renowned Soaphenge.

What is the significance of Soaphenge? – To honor the prehistoric gods of cleanliness by bathing with soap.

Why aren’t any other soaphenges? – After a point, quite a soap henges disappeared to nothing after enough ceremonial baths. Furthermore, soap henges in rainy regions simply dissolved into suds after fierce rainstorms.

So see Soaphenge now! You’ll be glad you did.

 

Soaphenge used huge blocks made from shea butter, cinnamon, cinnamon essential oil, and brown coloring.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: things to see and do | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Boston Brown Bread

Posted on June 17, 2023 by pauldelancey

American Appetizer

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BOSTON BROWN BREAD

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INGREDIENTS
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1 tablespoon butter
¼ teaspoon allspice
¼ teaspoon baking powder
¾ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
⅔ cup yellow cornmeal
¾ cup rye flour
½ cup whole wheat flour
½ cup raisins (optional)
1¼ cups buttermilk
½ cup molasses
½ teaspoon vanilla extract
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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3 coffee cans (Use the 14.5 ounce size or as near as you can get.)
aluminum foil
kitchen twine
8″*13″ casserole dish
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Serves 8.  Takes 2 hours 45 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease coffee cans with butter. Add allspice, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cornmeal, rye flour, wheat flour, and raisins (optional) to large mixing bowl. Mix with whisk or fork until well blended..
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Boil water. Add buttermilk, molasses, and vanilla  to medium mixing bowl. Mix with whisk or fork until well blended. Add buttermilk into large bowl containing dry ingredients. Gently mix with spatula until just combined. This is the batter.
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Spoon batter equally into the 3 coffee cans. The batter should not reach higher than ⅔ the way up the cans. Cover the top of the cans will aluminum. Tie aluminum securely to the cans with kitchen twine. Add cans to casserole dish. Put casserole on middle rack in oven. Leave rack partway out. Pour boiling water into casserole dish until the water level is ¾ the way up to the top of the dish. (This method is safer and easier than lifting a dish full of boiling water into the oven.)
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Bake at 325 degrees for 1 hour 20 minutes or until the top of a loaf will spring back when lightly touched or until loaves start to pull away from coffee cans. Remove aluminum foil. Place cans on cooling rack. Let cool for 1 hour. Turn over cans and tap the bottom to cans to get loaves to slide out. Goes well with cream cheese or baked beans.
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TIDBITS
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1) Boston Brown Bread is round. This is no accident.
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2) Bread Bread , however, is rectangular and made from bits and pieces of other bread loaves.
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3) Ned Ted Dredd bakes the most famous Bread Bread.
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4) It is said that Ned hails from Jamaica and wears dreadlocks. He’a also kinda scary. People dread seeing his dreads coming toward them.
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5) And that he is also a medical student at Kingston’s prestigious Kedd Medical University. It’s buildings are painted red to get its premeds used to the sight of blood.
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6) So, by all means visit Kedd Med Dread Dread Ned Ted Dredd’s Bread Bread Bakery.
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7) Any back in Boston, keen, lean, and mean Bob “Beantown” Beanstalk was drilling for samples deep into the Earth’s crust.
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8) For he was a, was a …
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9) Crustologist. You know the sort that drill into the crust looking for things that interest an amazingly small number of people.
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10) Anyway, “Beantown” was hopping–no, it’s spelled hoping–to find beetle exoskeletons in his core sample from one-mile down.
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11) For it’s well known that Ancient Egypt’s pharaohs and priests were absolutely gaga about beetles. They bred beetles to be pets. They held beetle relay races on religious holidays, They used rubies to fashion jewelry to look like beetles.
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12) Anyway, Beanstalk believed pharaohs dated back 10,000,009 years. Then if he could find similarly ancient beetles ‘neath the streets of Boston, then he would prove that Egypt was at one time adjacent to what is now New England.
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13) Incoming news! Just before press time, Boston Public Works just fired Bob Beanstalk. No reason was given.
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14) But just before getting the sack, and just before lunchtime, a hungry Bob looked at a brown, round soil sample. “Boy,” he said, “I am really hungry for some good, fresh bread.”
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15) As it so happened, Beanstalk’s wife  had filled his lunch pail with: butter, allspice, baking powder, salt, cornmeal, rye flour, whole wheat flour, raisins, buttermilk, molasses, vanilla extract, an 8″*13″ casserole dish, 3 round cans of coffee, aluminum foil, kitchen twine, six gallons of water, and two bunsen burners. After drinking all that coffee, frenetic Beantown’s synapses fired at an alarming rate and he soon created the first Boston Brown Bread out of the contents of his lunch pail.
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16) Now you know.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Chatting With Chefs, cuisine, history | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How I Gave Up Fomenting Revolution

Posted on June 16, 2023 by pauldelancey

It’s pretty much inevitable. If I have too much time on my hands, I will take to the streets and foment revolution. Law enforcement frowns on revolutionary acts. My neighbors wouldn’t like it; you should see their tidy lawns and beautiful gardens.

What to do? Fill my time with worthy activities, of course. This was easy when I worked and help my kids grow up. Then I retired and my children moved out. Suddenly, entire days freed up. I came so close to rushing out the front door, provocative banner in hand, ready to stir up things.

But I got hungry. And I wanted something different to eat. So threw myself into looking up exotic meals, putting together recipes, and cooking and publishing them. I also developed more aches and pains. Many of these necessitated seeing a doctor. However, you can never really count on your body parts declaring war on you. The day the only thing keeping you from torching parked cars, will be the day your body will feel fine.

So I needed another deversion, another hobby. I am now making my own specialty soaps. Most soaps will be for me, with the rest given away, I have once again filled my with productive things to do.

Our republic is once more secure from unrest.

 

My first homemade soaps. These are Lemon, Poppy Seed, Goat’s Milk

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: lifestyle, things to see and do | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Misheard Lyrics of the Beach Boys

Posted on June 15, 2023 by pauldelancey

Whew! I almost forgot about blogging tonight as I was making Boston Brown Bread and watching Harvard Beats Yale 29-29.

Anyway, did any of you ever thoink the Beach Boys sang “ape” instead of “ace” in the song “Fun, Fun, Fun.” Didn’t it change the meaning of the song just a bit? You bet.

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See what I mean? Quite honestly, I don’t see a second date in this man’s future.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: misheard | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Word: Soxportation

Posted on June 14, 2023 by pauldelancey

All of us, every last one of us, all over the world, have had a sock disappear while doing laundry. Where did it go? And how? This event frustrates and baffles us. And until now there has been word to describe it.

It’s high time to correct this oversight.

TODAY’S AWESOME WORD

Soxportation

Awesome entry #12

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Paul's Awesome Dictionay | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Francesinha

Posted on June 13, 2023 by pauldelancey

Portuguese Entree

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FRANCESINHA

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INGREDIENTS – STEAK AND SAUSAGE
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¾ pound flank steak or flap steak
1 tablespoon olive or vegetable oil
2 linguica or andouille sausages
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INGREDIENTS – SAUCE
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1½ tablespoons butter (½ tablespoon more later)
½ teaspoon minced garlic
2 tablespoons minced onion
¾ teaspoon piri piri or red pepper flakes
¼ cup beef broth
6 tablespoons  crushed tomatoes
¼ cup beer
½ tablespoon port or red wine
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INGREDIENTS – FINAL
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4 slices bread
1 cup frozen French fries
½ tablespoon butter
1 egg
4 slices (about 1 ounce each) Pecorino, Parmesan, Asiago, Romano, or your favorite cheese
4 slices ham, sliced medium thick
Serves 4. Takes 1 hour.
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PREPARATION – STEAK AND SAUSAGE
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Cut sausages in half lengthwise. Toast bread. Add oil to pan. Heat using medium-high heat. Oil is hot enough when a bit of bread in the oil starts to dance. Add flank steak. Sauté for 2-to-5 minutes, depending on how you like your steak. Flip. Sauté for 2-to-5 minutes more. It should be browned on both sides. Remove steak and cut in half, and set aside.
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Add sausage halves to pan. Sauté for 2 minutes. Flip. Sauté for 2 minutes more. It should be browned a little on both sides. Remove sausage halves and set aside.
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PREPARATION – SAUCE
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Add 1½ tablespoons butter, garlic, and onion to large, 2nd  pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir frequently. Add beef broth, crushed tomatoes, and piri piri flakes. Bring to boil. Stir occasionally. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add beer and wine. Let simmer on low for 12 minutes. Stir occasionally.
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PREPARATION – FINAL
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While sauce simmers, cook French fries according to instrustions on package Melt ½ table-spoon butter at medium heat in 3rd pan. Add egg and fry until done to your liking. Cut egg in half.
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Top bread slice with 2 cheese slices. Top cheese with ½ of the ham. Place steak half on ham. Place 2 sausage halves on steak. Place bread slice on sausage. Put egg half on top slice of bread. Cut sandwich in half. Ladle sauce over sandwich halves. Repeat for 2nd sandwich. Serve with fries on the side..
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TIDBITS
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1) Pablo Picasso was born in 1881. He was a great painter. The best. He earned the moniker the “The Big Man of Painting.” His friends called him Big Bad Pablo, or simply Big Bad.
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2) Culinary art historians credit Picasso with founding the Cubist Movement in 1870.
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3) Since 1870 was a full eleven years before Big Bad’s birth, I’m sure you will agree this was quite the achievement.
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4) Observers, some sane and some not,. hold that the Cubist Movement inspired the creation of the sugar cube, Rubik’s(tm) cube, and the car called the Cube(tm).
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5) Oh, and cube roots The cube root of 343 is 7.
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6) To the right is one of Picasso’s most famous paintings. It sold for 13.5 pounds.
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7) Oops, that’s 13.5 millions pounds. Editors are important.
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8) However, Pablo’s best painting is the still life, “Francesinha,” painted during his Portugese years. Francesinha is a Portuguese sandwich. Big Bad loved it. That’s why he moved to Portugal for six years. You can see the painting below and to the right
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9) I have never have made it as big as Picasso in the art world*. However, I’m proud of my recipes, food blogs, and cookbooks. And it’s all because his “Francesinha” spurred me to take up cooking.
* = As of press time.
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10) Picasso’sfirst name, Pablo, translates to Paul in English. Paul is my first name. So, that’s another connection between the renowned artist and me.
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11) For more information on Picasso’s life and artistic influence, you would do well to purchase a copy of Asa Metrics’, Pablo Picasso, A Life Lived from Birth to Death.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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­My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Behave Yourselves

Posted on June 12, 2023 by pauldelancey

Avoid this

I’ve been busy all day: making soap, balancing the checking account, reading, checking up on friends, and cooking up a storm. Time to relax.

So this blog is short. Behave yourself while I gone. Don’t push the Earth out of its orbit and send it spiralling into the Son.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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­My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: lifestyle | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Word: Nasalaugh

Posted on June 11, 2023 by pauldelancey

Nearly all of us have, at one time or another, have had laugh so hard that it became embarrassing. Strange to say, there’s no word for it.

It’s high time to correct this oversight.

TODAY’S AWESOME WORD

Nasalaugh

Awesome entry #11

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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­My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Paul's Awesome Dictionay | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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