Posts Tagged With: spam

Hawaiian Salad and Mongoose in Bikinis

Posted on May 2, 2014 by pauldelancey

Hawaiian Entree

HAWAIIAN SALAD

INGREDIENTSHawaiianSalad-

6 eggs
1 chicken breast
1 12 ounce can SPAMTM
1/4 head lettuce
1 tablespoon brown sugar
1 cup pineapple juice*
½ cup cheddar cheese
1 cup mayonnaise
1 cup pineapple chunks*

* = Or use all the juice and ½ of the pineapple chunks from a 20 ounce can of pineapple chunks.

makes 8 salad bowls

PREPARATION

Boil eggs on high heat for 6 minutes for soft boiled or 12 minutes for hard boiled. While eggs boil, cut chicken breast and SPAM into ½” cubes. Cut or shred lettuce to desired size.

Remove eggs and let them cool. While eggs cool, add chicken, SPAM, brown sugar, and pineapple juice to pan. Sauté for 8 minutes on medium-high heat. Stir frequently. Add lettuce, chicken/SPAM/pineapple juice, cheddar cheese, mayonnaise, and pineapple chunks to mixing bowl. Cut each egg into 4 slices. Top salad with egg slices.

TIDBITS

1) In Hawaii, it is against the law to appear in public wearing only swimming trunks. I don’t know about bikinis. I hope not.

2) You may not own a mongoose without a permit, but billboards are always outlawed. Go figure.

3) You can fined if you don’t own a boat. Do not pay your fine with coins hidden in your ears as having coins in your ear is illegal. I think it’s okay to put dollar bills there.

4) You may not have more than one alcoholic drink in front of you. I know, I know, you needed two stiff drinks after getting fined for having your unpermitted mongoose appear in public wearing only swimming trunks. And your neighbor had his mongoose strut along the beach wearing a bikini and now one cared. Here’s a tip; have your second tiki drink behind you.

5) Hawaii is the only state in America to grow coffee. You may put a coffee bean in your ear.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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SPAM Bento

Posted on October 18, 2013 by pauldelancey

Hawaiian Entree

SPAM BENTO

INGREDIENTSBentoBox-

2 cloves garlic
1/4 cup dandelion greens
1 Roma tomato
2/3 cup brown sugar
4 teaspoons lemon juice
1/2 cup pineapple juice
4 teaspoons red wine
3 tablespoons cup soy sauce
1/3 cup water
3 tablespoons cornstarch
1 12 ounce can SPAM
4 pineapple rings
2 cups plain cooked rice

makes 2 bentos (a Japanese style lunchbox)

PREPARATION

Mince garlic clove. Snip stems off dandelion greens; cut each green leaf into four pieces. Slice tomato into thin slices.

Prepare the marinade. Put garlic, brown sugar, lemon juice, pineapple juice, red wine, soy sauce, water, and cornstarch in large mixing bowl. Stir with whisk or fork until brown sugar dissolves and cornstarch blends in.

Slice SPAM into 4 thin rectangles;. add to marinade and let marinate for 60 minutes.

Place a skillet on medium heat; when hot, add SPAM and pineapple. Fry for 4 minutes on medium heat. Turn over SPAM and pineapple. Fry for another 4 minutes. Add marinade to SPAM and pineapple in skillet. Simmer for 8 minutes on low heat, stirring constantly.

Place half of the dandelion leaves in a small section of the bento. Put tomato in another small section. Place SPAM in one side of the large section and pineapple in the other side.

Serve with plain cooked rice. Wild dandelion leaves may be used in this. Fresh ingredients always taste better. It is not possible to get fresh SPAM.

Just look the recipe photo and wonder why bento boxes haven’t caught on everywhere.

TIDBITS

1) I entered this recipe in the International Bento Contest 2013. I was so proud to have participated.

2)I have tried to show with this bento dish how cooking fosters friendship between countries even when there has been conflict. American soldiers and seamen brought SPAM, canned spiced ham, with them as they fought in the Pacific from 1942 to 1953. Hawaiians and Koreans, in particular, learned to love this food and adopted it into their own cuisine.

3) I created SPAM bento to show how fun and enjoyable dishes can be when created with the humblest ingredients.

4) I presented this meal in honor of Chuseok, Korean Thanksgiving Holiday, which was being celebrated at this time. Koreans celebrate by visiting family, paying respects to ancestors, and giving and receiving gift-wrapped cans of SPAM.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Korean Army Base Stew

Posted on October 3, 2013 by pauldelancey

Korean Entree

ARMY BASE STEW
(Budae Jjigae)

INGREDIENTSArmyBaseStew-

1 12-ounce can SPAMTM
4 hot dogs
1 12-ounce package firm tofu
1/2 yellow onion
3 stalks green onions
2 cloves garlic
4 cups chicken stock
2 tablespoons gochuchang (hot Korean paste)
1 tablespoon gochucharu (or red pepper flakes)
1 teaspoon sugar
1/2 tablespoon sesame oil

1 3-ounce package ramen (don’t use spice packet)

PREPARATION

Slice SPAM, hot dogs, and tofu into 1/2″ cubes or slices. Dice yellow onion, green onions, and garlic cloves. Add all ingredients except ramen to large pot. Bring to boil on high heat, about 10 minutes, stirring frequently. Reduce to low heat and simmer for 15 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add ramen (no spice backet) and simmer on low 5 minutes. Stir occasionally. It’s spicy and enjoyable.

TIDBITS

1) Koreans love SPAM. Who knew? Okay, smarty pants, besides Koreans.

2) Many Koreans went hungry during and just after the Korean War. Thousands and thousands averted starvation only by getting food from nearby American army bases. The most prevalent gift from the GIs were cans of SPAM. People there are still grateful for this food and SPAM has been adopted into Korean cuisine.

3) I’ve heard that SPAM is popular in the Philippines as well because of the SPAM American soldiers brought with them in 1944 to 1946. My father was stationed in the Philippines after the War as part of America’s SPAM diplomacy.

4) South Korea is a firm ally of America and a strong trading partner. North Korea, however, threatens us with nuclear attack. Why? Because America never got a chance to get its SPAM bearing armies into that land. SPAM brings peace and amity everywhere. Wonderful SPAM, glorious SPAM.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Spam Burger From Hawaii

Posted on July 19, 2013 by pauldelancey

Hawaiian Entree

SPAM BURGER

INGREDIENTSSpamBurger-

3 cloves garlic
1 cup brown sugar
2 tablespoons lemon juice
3/4 cup pineapple juice
2 tablespoons red wine
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 12 ounce can SPAM

4 pineapple rings
4 slices mild cheddar cheese
4 lettuce leaves
4 hamburger buns

SPECIAL UTENSIL

electric skillet

PREPARATION

Mince garlic cloves. Put garlic, brown sugar, lemon juice, pineapple juice, red wine, soy sauce, water, and cornstarch in large mixing bowl. Stir with whisk or fork until brown sugar dissolves and cornstrach blends in. Cut SPAM into 8 strips. Add SPAM. Let SPAM marinate for 60 minutes.

Set skillet to 350 degrees. Put SPAM strips and pineapple rings in skillet. Fry for 4 minutes. Turn over SPAM and pineapple. Add cheese slices. Fry for another 4 minutes.

While SPAM strips and pineapple rings are frying, add marinade to frying pan. Simmer for 8 minutes on low heat, stirring constantly.

Put 2 SPAM strips with melted cheese on bottom buns. Ladle as much cooked marinade on top as desired. (If you desire a lot of sticky marinade, may I suggest a lot of napkins.) Add lettuce and complete with top hamburger bun.

Left over sauce goes great with stir fry.

TIDBITS

1) The derivation of the term “spam” for torrents of unsolicited e-mail and posts comes from a Monty Python skit where a diner serves SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, and more SPAM. This skit can be seen on YouTubeTM via the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anwy2MPT5RE

2) While tidbit 1) advanced the cause of literature and the arts, the following tidbits will extol SPAM’s contribution to culinary history.

3) SPAM was first canned in 1937. It’s jingle was: “SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, Hormel’s new miracle meat in a can. Saves time, tastes fine, to eat something grand as for SPAM.”

4) SPAM featured in soldiers’ meal during World War II as it is a good source of protein and is easy to eat. Famous people have spoken out about Spam.

“Without SPAM we wouldn’t have been able to feed our army.”
– Russian President Nikita Kruschev

“SPAM was a war-time delicacy.”
– Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher

“I ate my share of SPAM along with millions of other soldiers, I’ll even confess to a few unkind words about it – uttered during the strain of battle you understand. But as the former commander-in-chief of the allied forces, I believe I can still officially forgive you for your only sin: sending us so much of it.”
– President Dwight D. Eisenhower.

5) The SPAM Museum is Austin, Minnesota, “SPAM Town, USA.” Admission is free.

6) In 1989,Americans purchased 1,750 tons of SPAM. Purchases for other years is apparently a secret.

7) Hawaii has the largest per capita consumption of SPAM in the world. These islanders acquired their love for SPAM during World War II when millions of soldiers, marines, and seamen stationed there were fed vast amounts of SPAM.

8) There is an annual SPAM Jam block party in Waikiki. McDonald’s restaurants in Hawaii include SPAM, eggs, and rice on its breakfast menu.
cover

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Happy Thoughts For The End Of The World

Posted on December 21, 2012 by pauldelancey

December 21, 2012 has come and gone in the Eastern Hemisphere. No Mayan Apocalypse for them. Hurray! However, we in the Hemisphere could still die at any time today from a rogue planet slamming into the Earth.

Bummer.

While I entertain doubts on the Eastern Hemisphere surviving unscathed a rogue planet slamming into the Western Hemisphere, let us assume the Mayans were right. After all, their calendar looks quite similar to an Oreo and we all know how wonderful Oreos are. Also, the Mayans correctly predicted the demise of the Twinkie. Enough said on that. Let’s see if we can all find reasons to be happy about the demise of the Western Hemisphere:

1) You won’t have to do anymore laundry.

2) You won’t have to pick up your kid from school. Fighting your way through crazed moms picking up their little Timmys and Janes can be hell.

3) You won’t have to assemble all your receipts for the IRS.

4) You won’t have to pay the IRS anything.

5) No more phone calls from telemarketers.

6) No worries about zombie apocalypse. The rogue planet will obliterate all zombies, if any.

7) You won’t have to do laundry.

8) Your credit card’s billing cycle ends after the apocalypse. Buy, buy, buy!

9) No more spam from Nigerians offering to give you millions.

10) No more full-body scams at the airport from friends at the TSA.

11) No more rush-hour traffic.

12) No more laundry.

13) No worries about nuclear Armageddon.

14) No more sequels to Fifty Shades of Gray.

15) No more lutefisk.

16) No more visits to the dentist.

17) No more ads for Depends.

18) No more long checkout-lines at the supermarket.

19) No more freezing of your computer.

20) No more political campaigns.

See, you’re smiling again. Happy End of the Western Hemisphere To You Day.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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