Paul De Lancey's Blog

Inigo Montoya on Trafic Etiquette

Posted on October 9, 2024 by pauldelancey

I feel Inigo Montoya’s pain.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: apocalyptic, beneficial, Comic Chef, etiquette, Inigo Montoya, intersection, Italian, murders, pain, prepare to die, recipes, thriller, traffic, traffic light, turned green | Leave a comment

You Need to See a Spa Massage and a Fish

Posted on October 8, 2024 by pauldelancey

Today was a tough day, full of stress. Despite your best intentions, many more things went wrong than right. Your muscles have knotted up something fierce. You ache all over. You want company, but only if it’s quiet. And after your masseuse puts things right, you’ll be hungry. And you’ll yearn for lemon piccata fish. As who would not?

‘You need to see a spa message with a fish next to a head.

You need to see #42

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: you need to see | Tags: beneficial, Comic Chef, fish, good food, hungry, lemon piccata, massage, masseuse, muscles, Paul DeLancey, recipes, spa, stress, tough day, you need to see | Leave a comment

Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Phrase: Gravitational Experiment

Posted on October 7, 2024 by pauldelancey

How many times a day has this happened to you? An apple that was in your hands is now on the floor. Or milk that was all the way to the top of the glass is now spreading on the tablecloth.

The most common explanation for these two events is that you dropped the apple and knocked over the glass of milk. You, are in fact, clumsy.

This reasoning is most unkind. Being called a klutz damages your soul. You get depressed. You’re not even allowed to deal with your grief, your destroyed self esteem, by weeping over the growing puddle of milk. “Don’t cry over spilt milk.” Not only that some former friend will say, “Boy, are you clumsy?” And you are most certainly that. And yet, society denies you the release of sobbing. You find yourself abandoning complete sentences in favor of. Sentence fragments. And we all know sentence fragments are Devil’s gateway to murderous deeds.

However, your downward spiral into gratuitous slaying is isn’t inevitable.

Yay.

We need to change the word clumsiness, even the phrases dropping things and spilling thing. We need an impressive word, scientific words even, to be used instead.

And now there is:

TODAY’S AWESOME PHRASE

Gravitational Experiment

Awesome entry #48

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: Paul's Awesome Dictionay | Tags: apple, awesome, clumsiness, Devil's, dictionary, English, grief, klutz, milk, murderous, Paul's Awesome English Dictionary, scientific, self esteem, society, soul | Leave a comment

The Law of Formatting

Posted on October 6, 2024 by pauldelancey

I came up with the following law after many, many mano-a-mano bouts with formatting software.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: wise words | Tags: apocalyptic, beneficial, bouts, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, formatting, good food, law, mano a mano, murders, software, thriller, tricking | Leave a comment

My Grandma’s Wisdom – Useful

Posted on October 5, 2024 by pauldelancey

I miss my Swedish grandma very much. She was kind and very attentive. The following is something she used to say.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: about me, wise words | Tags: Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, grandma, hunks, kind, Lutheran, my grandma's, ornamental, recipes, stunt, Swedish, thriller, useful, wisdom | Leave a comment

Minnie Mouse Latch Hook Project – Part 1

Posted on October 4, 2024 by pauldelancey

I finished my Charlie Brown latch hook project, but with illnesses, doctor visits, and plate tectonics I’ve delayed starting a new project.

But no longer.

But first, two days I brought the mounted Charlie Brown(tm) latch hook to the crafts class. A librarian saw me holding it and took a picture. My project and I will be in a forthcoming county newsletter. Two other crafters took pictures as well. It all made me feel special and I was dearly needing a pick me up.

I’m taking over a friend’s barely started latch hook of Minnie Mouse(tm). It’s a little harder as the thread is somewhat thicker,

Anyway, here is my start.

Minnie Mouse – 10/04/2024

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: latch hook | Tags: apocalyptic, beneficial, Comic Chef, continuum, crafts class, Earth, latch hook, Minnie Mouse, orbit, project, space, Sun, thriller, time, yarn | Leave a comment

Short Post – Sad

Posted on October 3, 2024 by pauldelancey

I’m suffering from general sadness. One bit of good news; my back is good enough to start yoga lessons.

Thanks for putting up with this.

Categories: my life | 2 Comments

Chicken Flautas – 2

Posted on October 2, 2024 by pauldelancey

Mexican Entree

CHICKEN FLAUTAS

INGREDIENTS

2 pounds chicken breasts

2 garlic cloves

1 small onion

2 tablespoons vegetable oil (4 cups more later)

¼ teaspoon cumin

¼ pound queso fresco or feta cheese

½ cup salsa

12 uncooked or freshly made corn tortillas*

2 cups vegetable oil (or at least ½” deep)

2 tablespoons fresh cilantro

* = Cooked tortillas from the store require softening in the skillet or microwave. Uncooked tortillas while harder to find, make preparation easier.

SPECIAL UTENSILS

toothpicks

Serves 6. Takes 1 hour 30 minutes.

PREPARATION

Cut chicken breasts into parts weighing ½ pound. Add chicken parts and enough water to cover to pot. Bring to boil using high heat. Reduce heat to low-medium and simmer for 25 minutes or until chicken shreds easily. Move chicken to plate. Shred chicken using forks.

While chicken simmers, mince garlic and dice onion. Add garlic, onion, and 2 tablespoons oil to pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until garlic and onion soften. Stir frequently. Add shredded chicken and cumin. Stir until well blended. Remove from heat. Add equal amounts of the shredded chicken/onion mixture, queso fresco, and salsa to the middle of each tortilla. Roll up tortillas tightly and pin together with toothpicks. Break off toothpick ends if they stick out more than ¼” or so. (Rolled-up tortillas that have toothpicks that stick out a lot are difficult to turn over when frying.)

Add oil to pan. Heat oil using medium-high heat until a tiny piece of the tortillas starts to dance in the oil. Add rolled-up tortillas to pan seem-side down. Sauté at medium-high heat for 4 minutes or until tortillas turn golden brown. (You will probably need to turn the heat down or sauté for less time with succeeding batches.) Turn frequently to ensure even browning. (Be careful of splattering.) Remove from heat. Drain on plate covered with paper towel. Dice cilantro. Garnish with cilantro. Goes well with salsa.

TIDBITS

1) Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, “The Angler of Vienna,” was also a pretty darn talented musician, writing such toe-tapping operas such as, Il re Pastore, Zaide, Die Entführung aus dem Serail, Le Nozze di Figaro, Don Giovanni, and Cossi Fan Tutte.” By the way, Mozart’s agent, Paolo Fettuccine, arranged for tutti frutti, a new ice cream with chopped and candied fruits in it to be served at Cossi Fan Tutte’s debut. It was a stroke of P.R. genius. Ice cream lovers came for the dessert and stayed for the opera. Wolfgang never looked back, except when on the way to his secret fishing places. But it is in Mozie’s culinary operas where The Angler of Vienna’s talents really shined. Who can fail to be uplifted by his sole English work, The Three Penny Hot Dog? or feel the anguish of Gibt es wirklich keine Apfelkuchen? (Is There Really No Apple Pie?)

2) The years 1784 – 1787 were his happiest; he had great fishing spots to himself. These interludes of quietude were also the moments of his greatest musical creativity as witnessed by the Fish Cycle operas: Der Kabeljau auf dem Markt (The Cod at the Market), Limone Pesce Impanati (Lemon Breaded Fish), and of course, “The Angler of Vienna’s favorite, Il Mio Punto di Pesca (My Own Fishing Spot.)

3) It’s ironic that Mozart, a famous fan of German cuisine, would write his greatest opera about Mexican food. But who could not be inspired by the brilliant cuisine of Vienna’s famous restaurant, Los Cinco Tacos? Wolfang tried the restaurant’s chicken flautas and fell in love with them. He would stay up all night to compose the brilliant, brilliant I say, opera, Las Flautas Mágicas (The Magic Flautas.) Unfortunately, the politics of that year dictated that no operas be performed in Spanish. (Do try to see it if it’s being performed nearby.) Broken hearted that he was, Mozart rewrote his opus. And so we have the not too shabby Die Zauberflöte (The Magic Flute.) But Mozart would never again write about Mexican food.

4) Then on December 5, 1791, Mozart’s muse, Ernestine, imparted to him the idea of writing the opera Stoßen der magische Kugelfisch, (Puff the Magic Pufferfish.) So strong was Mozie’s excitement over what he knew what would be his magnum opus that he grabbed his fishing pole and raced to Danube River. He continually glanced over his shoulders to see if anyone were following, for all the local anglers would descend on him en masse and fish and fish out his little side pond. It was heartbreaking. Mozart had to scrap one seafood opera after another because he couldn’t bring in enough fish to give a true, abiding sense of its flavor and abiding soul. On one occasion, competitors once fished all the trout from his special inlet. This is why we never got to hear Guten Morgen, Forelle (Good Morning, Trout) and had to settle for the markedly inferior, Don Giovanni.

5) Anyway, Mozie eluded all anglers that day and caught six pufferfish. (1791 was an extraordinarily bountiful year for Viennese pufferfish.) Wolfie scurried home as fast as his chubby little legs would carry him. He cooked all the fish. Unfortunately, he died. For while his wiener schnitzel was second to none, he didn’t know how beans about preparing the potentially fatal pufferfish. His last words were, “Gott im Himmel, where are my car keys?” There were, of course, no cars in 1791 and so no need for car keys. Culinary historians Mozart had channeling the frustration of millions upon millions of people two centuries later.But Wolfgang’s musical vision for the pufferfish lasted through the centuries floating through the atmosphere until it found a suitable vessel, a worthy receptacle. This is how we got the classic song, “Puff the Magic Dragon” by Peter, Paul, and Mary. Sure the name and length of Stoßen der magische Kugelfisch changed a bit, but that magnum-opus had been floating around for centuries and became susceptible to modern musical scenes. And there you go.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: chicken, Danube River, Don Giovanni, flautas, guten morgen, Kugelfisch, Le Nozze di Figaro, Mozart, operas, pufferfish, queso fresco, salsa, tortillas, Vienna, Wolfgang | Leave a comment

Bastani Sonnati (Saffron Ice Cream)

Posted on October 1, 2024 by pauldelancey

Persian Dessert

BASTANI SONNATI

(Saffron Ice Cream)

INGREDIENTS

¼ teaspoon saffron threads

1 egg yolk

1¾ cups heavy cream

⅔ cup sugar

1⅓ cups whole milk

2½ tablespoons rosewater

½ teaspoon vanilla extract

¼ cup chopped pistachios – raw, unsalted

SPECIAL UTENSILS

Dutch oven

1 4-cup Mason jar

Makes 3½ cups. Takes 30 minutes plus 8 hours in the freezer.

PREPARATION

Add saffron threads to medium mixing bowl. Crush saffron threads with fingers. Add egg yolk to small mixing bowl. Beat yolk with fork or whisk until well blended. Add heavy cream, sugar, whole milk, and crushed saffron to Dutch oven. Cook for 4 minutes or until sugar dissolves. Stir constantly.

Slowly add hot saffron/heavy cream mixture to mixing bowl with blended egg yolk, whisking constantly. Add saffron/heavy cream/egg yolk mixture to Dutch oven. Cook for 7 minutes or until mixture thickens and coats a spatula.

Remove from heat. Add rosewater and vanilla extract. Blend with fork or whisk until you get a well blended ice cream. Hold both handles of Dutch oven and carefully pour ice cream to Mason jar. Mix with whisk until well blended and saffron are evenly distributed. Tightly close Mason jar. Vigorously shake Mason jar. (You really want the saffron bits to be evenly spaced. Shake again if saffron bits have settled to bottom of jar.)

Chill in freezer or until ice cream sets completely. Top ice cream with pistachio bits before serving.

TIDBITS

1) Beethoven wrote sonatas. I’ve created a sonnati. The score is tied: Beethoven – 1, Me – 1.

2) Beethoven composed symphonies. As of press time, I have not. Beethoven wins 2 to 1.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: bastani.sonnati, Beethoven, Comic Chef, dessert, ice cream, Iranian, mason jar, Persian, pistachios, press time, rosewater, saffron, sonatas, symphonies, vanilla extract | Leave a comment

Life Tips & Tricks – Challenges

Posted on September 30, 2024 by pauldelancey

The following is especially true in cooking, or so a friend told me.

Life Tip and Trick #1

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

Categories: life tips | Tags: apocalyptic, challenge, Chef Paul, Comic Chef, cookbook, cooking, cuss, good food, life, Lutheran, murders, Paul R. De Lancey, recipes, swear, truths | Leave a comment

Inigo Montoya on Trafic Etiquette

You Need to See a Spa Massage and a Fish