Posts Tagged With: Persian

Grilled Saffron Chicken (Joojeh kabab)

Persian Entree

GRILLED SAFFRON CHICKEN
(Joojeh Kabab)

INGREDIENTSGrilledSaffronChicken-

1 onion
1/2 tablespoon lime juice
1/2 cup olive oil
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1 gram (1/28 ounce) teaspoon saffron threads
1/4 teaspoon salt

4 chicken breasts (2 pounds)
3 medium tomatoes

basmati rice (optional)
naan bread (optional)

SPECIAL UTENSIL

metal skewers
outdoor grill

PREPARATION

Grate or dice onion. Add onion, lime juice, olive oil, pepper, red pepper powder, saffron, and salt to large mixing bowl. Mix well with whisk to make marinade. Cut chicken breasts into 1 ½” cubes. Add chicken cubes to mixing bowl. Turn chicken cubes until they are completely coated with marinade. Cover with lid or plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight or for about 8 hours.

Take long nap or have a nice sleep. Dream about being a pirate, becoming a monarch, or being the first person to set foot on Mars.

Wake up. Thread chicken cubes onto metal skewers. Coat tomatoes with marinade. Thread tomatoes onto its own skewer. Preheat grill to on high. Barbecue chicken for 5-to-10 minutes. Turn chicken skewers over and barbecue for another 5-to-10 minutes. (Don’t overcook as chicken will become dry. Grill times vary wildly between grill. Check constantly). Grill tomatoes for 5 minutes then make a 1/4th turn with its skewer. Repeat 3 more times for a total of 20 minutes or until skin cracks on all sides. (Again, monitor this carefully.)

Serve with basmati rice or naan bread.

TIDBITS

1) During President Johnson’s administration, the war in Vietnam escalated dramatically, the Soviet Union and the Warsaw Pact invaded Czechoslovakia, the Civil Rights Act passed, and riots erupted in many American cities. President Johnson needed time to get away from the daily stress of his office and so added barbecues to the White House roof.

2) Decades later, anti-aircraft missiles would be added to the roof of the White House to protect its barbecues.

3) America has the world’s largest number of barbecues.

4) It also has the world’s most powerful military.

5) It has to. The world wants America’s barbecues.

6) It’s not an entirely stable situation.

7) That’s why in 2003, America embarked on a barbecue-treaty signing spree with nations around the world. The first such treaty, Oil for Barbecue, with Saudi Arabia was instant success and provided the blueprint for future Barbecue Diplomacy.

8) There is a lot of sand in Saudi Arabia. However, there are a quite a lot of dinosaurs fossils in America.

9) No one knows for sure if dinosaurs had barbecues. There are no fossil records to support or deny such a hypothesis.

10) Sauropods certainly never held barbecues. They had no opposable thumbs, essential to holding metal spatulas. Indeed, these dinosaurs possessed no hands at all, opting to involve with four feet instead. Sauropods rarely got invited to block-party barbecues as their extremely size, limited agility, and low-level intelligences meant they often stomped on the grills, ruining the festivities.

11) Oh, and sauropods were vegetarians. They wouldn’t eat the barbecued ribs their hosts prepared for them. Their carnivore hosts often took this culinary reticence for rudeness and killed the sauropods. Which provided more meat for the barbecues. The barbecue brachiosaurus ribs were to die to for. Which they did.

12) Faced with extinction from barbecue loving meat eaters such as the allosaurus, the sauropods evolve into bigger and bigger dinosaurs such as the diplodocus and the seismosaurus, so that they would become to big to fit on the existing Jurassic grills.

13) However, the succeeding Cretaceous period saw the rise of the giganotosaurus and the tyrannosaurus rex. These fierce predators loved sushi, preferring to eat their properly prepared and spice prey raw.

14) Barbecue use dwindled. Then a meteor hit the Earth 64 million years ago, extinguishing the dinosaurs and what little culinary expertise they possessed. But now, finally, barbecues are back. We live in a new, golden age.

– Chef Paul

Cookbook&4Novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

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Categories: cuisine, history, humor, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Greek Gyros

Greek Entree

GREEK GYROS

 INGREDIENTSGyro-

8 Pita breads or Flat beads
1 1/2 pounds ground turkey meat
1/2 tablespoon Prudhomme Poultry MagicTM spice
lettuce
Greek cucumber sauce or tzatziki sauce from previous chapter

PREPARATION

Mix poultry spice with turkey meat. Cook meat until browned. You may wish to taste at this point. If under spiced, add more. Heat four pita breads in microwave for a minute.

Put meat in pita. Add lettuce. Spoon a liberal–-if that is a dirty word for you, substitute a generous–-amount of cucumber sauce on top. Enjoy.

Dish works well with chicken noodle soup.

Did you have a Mr. Potato Head when you were a kid? Just asking.

TIDBITS

1) The best Greek restaurant during my grad school days at the University of Wisconsin was Zorba the Greek. They had these giant, about four-feet tall columns of lamb-beef cooking all the time. Juice dripped down the sides and they would carve off succulent strips for your gyro. If you have a huge grill like this and can find gigantic columns of Greek meat, go for it!

2) The Greeks decisively defeated the Persian invaders at the battle of Plataea in 479 B.C. This battle saved Western philosophy, sense of the individual, and its nascent democratic ideals. It is comforting to think that this very recipe gave the Greek hoplites the courage to rout forever the Persian spearmen.

3) Ancient Greeks enjoyed food to go.
cover

My cookbookEat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, is available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Egg Foo Young

Chinese Entree

EGG FOO YOUNG

INGREDIENTS 

VEGGIE-CHICKEN MIX

1/2 chicken breast
1 medium white onion
2 stalks green onions
1 stalk celery
1 garlic clove
1 cup bean sprouts
2 teaspoons sesame oil
1/2 teaspoon cornstarch
1 1/2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon white pepper

2 tablespoons peanut oil
8 eggs (2 at a time)

no-stick spray

SAUCE

4 tablespoons soy sauce
1 tablespoon dry sherry
1 tablespoon water
2 tablespoons cornstarch

PREPARATION

Dice chicken breast, white onion, green onion, celery, and garlic clove. Put sesame oil in frying pan or skillet. Add onion, green onion, celery, clove, and sprouts. Heat on medium for about 5 minutes or until veggies are tender. Stir frequently.

Add chicken breast, cornstarch, soy sauce, salt, and white pepper. Cook for about 3 minutes on medium or until chicken bits have all changed color. Remove veggie-chicken mixture from frying pan and set aside.

Beat eggs. (This should be easy as your grasp of mixed-martial arts exceeds that of the genial egg.) Spray pan with no-stick spray. Heat peanut oil on medium. Add 2 eggs and cook on medium until eggs begin to set. Flip over egg patty. (You might want to use two spatulas. I wonder if any chefs use crossed spatulas as their coats of arms.) Or could use a spatula to cut the big patty into four manageable patties each time you add a layer of eggs.

Add about 1/3 of the veggie-chicken mix to the top of the patty. Add 2 more eggs and cook on medium until eggs on top begin to set. Flip over the whole patty. You should now have 2 layers of eggs and one mix. Repeat this step 2 more times until you have 4 layers of eggs and 3 of the mix. Watch the egg layer each time you flip the whole patty. Be careful that they don’t burn. Lower the heat, if at any time, the egg layer browns.

Remove the patty, or patties, from the pan and set on serving plate.

SAUCE

Put soy sauce, dry sherry, and water in frying pan. Bring to boil then immediately turn off heat. Add cornstarch and mix until sauce thickens. The sauce add flavor, texture, and enhances the appearance of this entree.

(This is especially true if you went the “one big patty” route and it fell apart during cooking. Refrain from cussing in Swahili. Simply cover the broken patty completely with sauce. Nobody will ever know there’s a break in the patty after you’ve divided the patty into two, three, or four pieces.)

Just smile and serve.

TIDBITS

1) Untying knots becomes easier when you sprinkle it with cornstarch.

2) While Alexander the Great was busy conquering the Persian empire he came across a two ropes tied together at Gordian. A prophet told him if could separate the ropes he would win many victories. People pooh poohed the idea that anyone could untie the intricate knot, but Alexander simply slashed the knot into two with one mighty sweep of his sword. To this day, the Gordian knot is a metaphor for not having cornstarch on ones person.

3) Alexander did indeed conquer quite a few exotic lands, even unto India. But he never quite reached China.

4) So, the Great one never got to taste egg foo young.

5) Did China have egg foo young in the time of Alexander the Great, some 2,300 years ago? Would he have like it?

6) We just don’t know. There just weren’t any many alternative military cuisinal historians around.

7)Is “cuisinal” even a word?

4) See above for 4).

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

 

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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