Monthly Archives: April 2023

American Entree

SWISS STEAK

INGREDIENTS

1 garlic clove
½ green bell pepper
1 red bell pepper
1 large onion
1 pound round or cube steak
½ cup flour
½ teaspoon Meat MagicTM spice
½ teaspoon oregano
½ teaspoon paprika
½ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
¼ cup vegetable oil
½ tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce
3/4 cup beef broth
1 14.5 cans diced tomato
½ tablespoon tomato paste

SPECIAL UTENSILS

Meat tenderizer or mallet
Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.

Mince garlic. Take out the innards of the green and red bell peppers. Slice bell peppers and onion into rings.

Take your meat mallet, unleash your anger, and tenderize the steak until it is ¼-inch thick. (Show this to your daughter’s date when you tell him to have her back by ten.)

Mix flour, Meat MagicTM spice, oregano, paprika, pepper, and salt in large bowl with fork or whisk. Take steak and turn it over in the bowl until it is thoroughly covered on both sides with flour. Set aside. Repeat for more than one round or cube steak.

Pour ¼ cup vegetable oil into Dutch oven. Cook at medium-high heat. Once oil starts to show currents or bubble, reduce to medium heat and add a steak. May I suggest using a spatula or tongs, so that your hand is far away from the hot oil? Or holding the lid in your other hand? (Don’t want the kids to learn new words.)

Cook the steak for 2 minutes on each side or until the sides are golden brown. Remove the steak and repeat until all steaks are cooked.

Using the same Dutch oven combine onion, bell peppers, and garlic. Sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Stir in diced tomatoes, tomato paste, Worcestershire sauce, and beef broth. Add tenderized steak(s).

Cover Dutch oven and put in middle rack of oven. Bake at 325 degrees for 90 minutes to 2 hours or until meat is tender or is falling apart. (Falling apart is not necessarily an allusion to the author.)

TIDBITS

1) Swiss steak does not come from Switzerland anymore than does Enchiladas Suiza.

2) Instead, it is the name of the method for pounding meat or running it through rollers to soften it.

3) Swiss steak is not as popular as it used to be as people became more able to buy better cuts of meat, had less time for cooking, or became vegetarians.

4) All supermarkets have sections full of expensive meat substitutes ranging in quality from “Not bad, tasting like meat,” to “Ugh, I didn’t know soap could be made edible.”

5) Fortunately, chocolate makes meat eaters and vegetarians alike happy.

6) Which is why Switzerland remained at peace during both World Wars. Whenever armies sidled up to the Swiss borders, the Swiss would give their would-be foes bars upon bars of the finest Swiss chocolate and the warriors would go away happy.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.