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This is my 800th consecutive blog. Thank you, gentle people, for reading them.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Where’s Bettie?
Where’s Waldo is quite the amusing diversion. It’s loved by millions. But it can take time to find that rascally Waldo, particularly since he loves to hang with folks wearing nearly identical outfits. Clearly he doesn’t want to stand out in a crowd. I think it would be nigh on impossible to pick Waldo out of a police lineup.
As mentioned above, finding Waldo is quite the pleasant way to pass the time. But what if you don’t have the time to pass? What if your fiancée is flying back from a trip to see her family? You’re supposed to leave the house at at nine at night to get her home from the airport.. However, it’s only 8 P.M.. You decide to pass the time playing Waldo. But you can’t find Waldo. You really, really can’t pick him out. He’s in a crowd of Waldo impersonators. Also the characters in the picture are teeny tiny and you can’t distinguish them since you lost your reading glasses.
You’re really not having a good day. However, you’re not a quitter. You persevere. The minutes pass. The hours pass. At first, she waits eagerly for the love of her life to come rescue her from airport hell. Soon she looks forward to seeing you. Then she grows antsy. A deep and abiding hatred develops. Eventually, a red mist envelops her.
You break all speed limits to get to the airport. At 3 a.m.. You run toward her and throw open your arms to hug her. She drills you between your eyes with a bullet from her Glock(tm). Ironically, you gave her the Glock for her own protection. You, however, cannot appreciate the irony. You’re dead.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. You should have played “Where’s Bettie?” I show the game in the picture on the right. The game is rated as being solvable in five minutes, but many people claim to have solved the puzzle in less time than that. Play “Where’s Bettie?” and you’ll never miss a can’t-miss appointment again.
Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Italian Entree
CHICKEN ALLA VALDOSTANA
INGREDIENTS
4 chicken breasts
¼ cup flour
¼ teaspoon pepper
½ teaspoon salt
1½ tablespoons butter
1½ tablespoons olive oil
½ cup dry white wine
4 proscuitto (aka Parma ham) slices
4 slices Fontina or Gruyère or Gouda slices
SPECIAL UTENSIL
kitchen mallet
Serves 4. Takes 45 minutes.
PREPARATION
Pound chicken breasts with kitchen mallet until they are ½” thick. Add flour, pepper, and salt to mixing bowl. Add chicken breasts to bowl. Turn chicken breasts until they are thoroughly coated. Add butter and oil to large frying pan. Use high heat until butter melts and foams. Stir frequently to ensure even melting. Add chicken breasts. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes on each side on until both sides turn golden brown. Remove chicken and set aside. Keep butter and oil.
Add wine to pan. Heat for 3 minutes or until liquid bubbles. Stir frequently. Top each chicken breast with a slice of proscuitto and a slice of Fontina cheese. Return chicken to pan. Spoon liquid from pan over each chicken breast. Cover and reduce heat to low. Simmer for 5 minutes or until cheese melts. Pairs well with the expensive Italian white wine your guests should be bringing.
TIDBITS
1) One of the most successful series of booklets ever is “Where’s Waldo?” Here, a child needs to find the character WaldoTM hidden on a page with of hundreds of lookalikes. This challenge gives new mothers time to perform only distantly remembered pleasures such as taking naps or being undisturbed in the bathroom.
2) In Italy, however, they play “Where’s Valdo?” This title of this recipe is one example. “Valdo” is cleverly hidden in “Valdostana.” Yes, this is a word game in contrast to the pictorial “Waldo.” In this case, young Italian mothers invite their little ones to find “Valdostana” in the daily newspaper. Sometimes it takes all day to find that word in print. This gives mothers a golden chance to get things done. And all that reading does wonders for children’s vocabulary. Indeed, most six-year olds in Italy can read at the fifth-grade level.
Chef Paul
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
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