Posts Tagged With: rice

Teriyaki Chicken With Rice

Japanese Entree

TERIYAKI CHICKEN WITH RICE

INGREDIENTS

2 garlic cloves
1 1/2 teaspoons water (3 cups more later)
1 1/2 tablespoons cornstarch
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup soy sauce
1 1/2 tablespoons cider vinegar
1/4 teaspoon ginger
1/4 teaspoon Poultry MagicTM spice
3 chicken breasts

1 1/2 cups brown rice
3 cups water
2 yellow bell peppers
2 stalks green onion

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Mince garlic cloves. Cut chicken breasts into fourths. Dice yellow peppers and green onion.

Add garlic, water, cornstarch, sugar, soy sauce, cider vinegar, ginger, and poultry spice. Stir frequently while cooking on medium-high heat until sauce thickens and bubbles. Do not boil.

Pour sauce into baking dish, size 8-inches by 8-inches or greater. Put chicken into pan. Turn the chicken pieces around in the sauce until all sides are coated. Bake the chicken for about an hour or until done.

While chicken is baking, cook rice as directed on the bag of rice, use rice, or cook until rice is tender. Add minced bell peppers and green onion to top of rice.

Put rice mixture in bowl. Add teriyaki chicken and sauce.

TIDBITS

1) Don’t spill cornstarch. That white stuff gets everywhere.

2) “Teri” is Japanese for “luster” coming from the sauce and “yaki” means “grill.”

3) The “Why did the chicken cross the road?” joke came from vaudeville about a hundred years ago.

4) The most prestigious act out of ten vaudeville acts was the ninth.

5) I looked up “Fun facts about soy sauce” on GoogleTM and was given “Fun facts about strippers” as the second entry. I don’t believe I want to know the connection between soy sauce and strippers.

6) Often Chinese greet each other with “Have you had your rice today?” instead of “How are you?” Much nicer than “How’s it hanging?” don’t you think?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Garlic Potato Rice Soup

French Soup

GARLIC POTATO RICE SOUP

INGREDIENTS

1/3 cup rice
2/3 cup water

2 russet potatoes
1 red potatoes
2 garlic cloves
1/3 large yellow onion
1 2/3 cups chicken broth
1/3 cup water
1/3 tablespoon Poultry MagicTM Spice
1/6 teaspoon lemon pepper spice

UTENSIL

potato masher

PREPARATION

Cook rice separately according to instructions on package. While rice is cooking, peel russet and red potatoes. Cut both types of potatoes into eighths. Peel and mince garlic cloves and onions.

Put potato eighths, garlic, onion, chicken broth, water, Poultry Spice, and lemon pepper into large soup pan. Cook at medium-high for about 50 minutes or until all the potato eighths are completely soft. Mash the potatoes constantly until you feel no resistance. (No, there is no masher for human relationships. No. No! I said no.) Stir frequently. Add cooked rice to potato soup.

Supermarket potatoes cost almost the same whether you buy five pounds, two pounds, or just one microwavable tater. So, we all purchase the economical five-pound bag, leaving us with a lot of potatoes. This tasty recipe reduces your spud surplus wonderfully.

TIDBITS

1) The nutritious potato almost single-handedly kept European peasantry alive during the Thirty Years War in the 17th century.

2) Deadly nightshade is related to the potato. Unlike, its cousin, the tater, this plant is a deadly poison.

3) Which is why my recipes never include deadly nightshade.

4) Nor any other poison for that matter.

5) I do, however, use tomatoes frequently. Tomatoes are related to both the potato and deadly nightshade and were considered poisonous by American settlers in the late 17th century.

6) This fear by early colonials of the mighty tomato completely explains the lack of pizza parlors in early America.

7) Salem, Massachusetts became notorious for its Witch Trials of 1692.

8) In 1905, Lombardi’s in New York became the first restaurant licensed to sell pizza.

9) So, the Witch Trials delayed the licensing of American pizza by 213 years.

10) This explains resistance to capital punishment among many chefs.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Chinese Lemon Chicken

Chinese Entree

LEMON CHICKEN

INGREDIENTS

1 1/2 cups rice
3 cups water

MARINADE
2 1/2 pounds chicken breasts
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon Poultry MagicTM spice (1 teaspoon total, with 1/4 tsp. for batter, and tsp. 1/4 for sauce.)

BATTER
3 eggs
1/3 cup cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon Poultry MagicTM spice (1 teaspoon total, with 1/2 tsp. for marinade, and 1/4 tsp. for sauce.)

vegetable oil for frying

SAUCE
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 1/4 cups chicken broth
1/2 cup lemon juice
1 1/2 tablespoons honey
1/4 teaspoon ginger
1/4 teaspoon Poultry MagicTM spice (1 teaspoon total, with 1/2 tsp. for marinade, and 1/4 tsp. for batter.)
2 tablespoons vegetable oil

PREPARATION

Cook rice according to instructions on accompanying bag. This should take about 30 minutes.

Cut chicken breasts into 1-inch cubes. This cutting is easiest when the chicken is partially thawed. Use a large bowl to coat all sides of the chicken cubes with soy sauce and poultry spice. Put this bowl in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.

While chickens marinates or rice cooks, use whisk or fork to thoroughly mix eggs with cornstarch, baking powder, and poultry spice. Coat the chicken cubes with this batter.

Put brown sugar, chicken broth, lemon juice, honey, ginger, and poultry spice in bowl. Mix this sauce thoroughly with whisk, fork, or briefly in a particle accelerator.

Heat skillet to 350 degrees. Put chicken in skillet along with excess batter. Don’t stack chicken cubes; cook another batch instead. Cook until the chicken is done; it should be firm and white, not purplish and translucent. Remove cooked chicken cubes and place them on paper towels to remove grease.

Heat 2 tablespoons vegetable oil in sauce pan and mix in the sauce. Stir frequently and cook on medium heat until sauce becomes clear.

Put rice in bowls. Top rice with lemon chicken and sauce and serve.

TIDBITS

1) I have a lemon tree growing in my back yard as well as an orange tree.

2) We had a loquat bush and a guava bush when I was growing up.

3) Lemons grow in California, Italy, Portugal, and Spain.

4) Christopher Columbus discovered the New World in 1492. He hailed from Italy and sailed for Spain. Spain and Portugal were responsible for most of the world’s discoveries in the 16th century.

5) America was really first discovered by intrepid people crossing the land bridge from Asia to Alaska. They did not eat lemons.

6) Neither did the Vikings who discovered America about a thousand years ago.

7) My goodness, America got discovered a lot.

8) People during the Middle Ages served fish with lemon slices. They thought the lemon’s acid would dissolve any fish bones they accidentally swallowed.

9) Lemon juice slows the browning of sliced apples.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Greek Stuffed Bell Peppers

Greek Entree

STUFFED BELL PEPPERS

INGREDIENTS

1 cup brown rice
6 bell peppers (any color)
2 cups water (diet water is okay)
1 1/2 pounds ground turkey
1 1/2 teaspoons dried basil
1 teaspoon Prudhomme’s Poultry MagicTM pice
1/2 teaspoons Prudhomme’s Vegetable MagicTM spice
0 teaspoons salt (too much salt is bad for you. Boo, salt, boo)
1/2 teaspoons black pepper
olive oil
1/4 teaspoons paprika
pig sweat (not really)
1 sweetheart to help you find all the ingredients. Some of the fixings will be lurking behind jugs of milk in the refrigerator

SPECIALTY ITEM

Rice cooker

PREPARATION

The most important thing in this recipe is having the ingredients. But you do have flexibility. For example, if you don’t have Prudhomme’s Poultry MagicTM spice, use poultry seasoning, coriander, or dill.

The first step is to cut off the tops of the bell peppers and remove the stem and seeds. Fill a pot with water and put a steaming rack over the pot. Put the peppers on the rack. Boil the water in the pot for ten minutes. (Enough time for a three-mile-run if you’re really fast.) All this is done to soften the peppers.

You really ought to know how to cook rice, especially for this recipe. Theoretically, having a rice cooker ought to be idiot-proof. Ha, not for this idiot.

I had never used this rice cooker before. I measured a cup of rice and poured it in. I measured another cup of water and poured it in. There didn’t seem to be as much water as I had thought there would be. I poured another cup. Same result.

The water pooling onto the counter told me something was amiss. “Honey,” I said, “water’s coming out the rice maker.”

She strode into the kitchen, cleaned up the water, looked at the cooker, and at me. “You didn’t put the black plastic pot into the cooker. You probably ruined it.”

“I didn’t know there was a plastic pot,” I said in my defense. My synapses were really firing.

After much spirited debate, I unscrewed the bottom of the cooker and extracted the remaining 223,192 kernels. My wife took the cooker to the bathroom and dried the contraption with a hair dryer. We put it back together, this time with the plastic pot.

Oh, I combined the stupid rice with the turkey meat and all those spices. Mixed them thoroughly with my hands. Don’t shake hands with people while doing this.

Carefully scoop the rice/meat mass into the peppers. Pour some olive oil on top of the peppers and coat the seeds with the oil. Yes, olive oil is oily. If your fingers got coated, you’ll have to wash your hands again. Sprinkle a good amount of paprika on top of the peppers and meat to obtain a nice browning.

Place the stuffed peppers in a baking dish and cook for 35-50 minutes at 350 degrees until the meat is completely cooked. Please do not let anyone fiddle with the timer during the baking. If so, you’ll have to take the peppers out of the oven more than once and poke at the meat to see if it’s done. DO NOT do this without a pot holder.

Any excess rice/meat mass can be combined with ranch beans to make a tasty side dish.

Well, there you have it. These bell peppers made a scrumptious main course. My family loved it. I don’t know if I’ll make it again, though. I’m powerful afraid of that rice cooker.

TIDBITS

1) Asians eat close to forty times as much rice per year as the average American.

2) Although you can puff rice, it does not “pop” as well as popcorn.

3) Rice is a symbol of fertility. That’s why people used to throw handfuls at weddings. The practice stopped when lawyers and insurers stepped in. One might also imagine couples wishing to remain childless objecting.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, humor, international, recipes | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Stir Fry Chicken

Chinese Entree

CHICKEN STIR FRY

INGREDIENTS

2 chicken breasts
2 cloves garlic
1 yellow bell pepper
2 teaspoons peanut oil
2 teaspoons sesame oil

3 tablespoons honey
2 1/2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/8 teaspoon white pepper
1/2 teaspoon ginger
6 ounces bean sprouts
2 large carrots
2 teaspoons cornstarch

1 cup rice
2 cup water

PREPARATION

Cut chicken into 1/2-inch cubes or dice with food processor. (Chicken cubes make poor ear plugs.) Scrape off skin from carrots with knife and remove tops and bottoms. Dice garlic, bell pepper, and carrots.

Put chicken, garlic, bell pepper, sesame oil, and peanut oil in large no-stick frying pan or wok. Cook on medium heat until chicken is lightly browned. Stir occasionally.

Add honey, soy sauce, white pepper, ginger, sprouts, and carrots. Cook on medium heat until all is hot. Stir occasionally. Add cornstarch. Stir in cooked rice (cooked according to instructions on bag) and serve.

Simple and tasty.

TIDBITS

1) Rice is much more popular in Asia than in the United States.

2) However, Sam Rice, of the 1924 Washington Senators, was very popular in Washington, D.C. It is doubtful many in Asia had ever heard of him.

3) 1924 was the only year the Senators won the World Series.

4) In the 1960s, some losers of the World Series later toured and played in Japan.

5) Japanese samurais of the 10th to 16th centuries were famous for their swordsmanship.

6) So naturally, samurai trading cards were all the rage in Australia in 1965. There was even a well-watched t.v. show called Shintaro.

7) I had an outfit just like Shintaro and a genuine toy sword, too.

8) Where did they go?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, food, history, humor, international, recipes, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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