Posts Tagged With: Indonesia

Eggs Padang In Spicy Coconut Milk

Indonesian Entree

EGGS PADANG IN SPICY COCONUT MILK

 

INGREDIENTS – GARNISH

6 shallots (6 more later)
½ cup – vegetable oil (2 more tablespoons later)

INGREDIENTS – SPICE PASTE

1″ galangal root* or ginger root
1″ ginger root or 2 teaspoons ginger powder
½” turmeric root* or ½ teaspoon turmeric powder
6 shallots
5 Thai chiles (also known as bird’s eye chiles) or Fresno chiles
5 garlic cloves
1 tablespoon coconut milk (2 more cups later)

INGREDIENTS – REST

10 hard-boiled eggs
1 stalk lemongrass or 1 tablespoon lemon zest
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
4 kaffir lime leaves* or bay leaves, or 1 teaspoon lemon zest
2 cups coconut milk
1 tablespoon tamarind juice*, tamarind paste*, white wine, or rice vinegar

* = You can get these items at Asian or world supermarkets, or use the substitutes listed above.

SPECIAL UTENSILS

mandoline
spice grinder
food processor
wok or pan with tall sides
sonic obliterator (No modern kitchen should be without one)

Serves 4. Takes 2 hours 5 minutes.

PREPARATION – GARNISH

Peel shallots. Use mandoline or knife to thinly slice 6 shallots. Add shallot slices and ½ cup vegetable oil to pan. Sauté for 5 minutes at medium-high heat or until shallot becomes crispy and turns golden brown. Remove crispy shallot from pan. Drain and reserve.

PREPARATION – SPICE PASTE

Use spice grinder to make paste of galangal root, ginger root, and turmeric root. Peel 6 shallots. Add all spice-paste ingredients to food processor. Blend until you get a paste.

PREPARATION – REST

Add enough water to cover 10 eggs to large pot. Bring water to boil using high heat. Carefully add eggs. Boil from 6 minutes (for soft-boiled eggs) to 12 minutes (for hard-boiled eggs.) Remove shells.

While eggs boil, remove white, hard part of lemongrass. Dice the green, inside part.. Add 2 tablespoons oil, diced lemongrass, and kaffir lime leaves to pan. Sauté for 5 minutes at medium-high heat or until the sautéed ingredients becomes fragrant. Stir frequently.

Add 2 cups coconut milk to wok. Bring to boil using medium heat. Stir frequently. Add spice paste and sautéed kaffir leaves and lemongrass. Cook for two minutes. Stir frequently. Carefully add eggs. Bring to boil again using medium heat, stirring frequently. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 12 minutes or sauce. Stir enough to prevent burning. Add tamarind juice. Stir gently until well blended. Remove kaffir lime leaves. Garnish with crispy shallot slices. Use sonic obliterator to zap guests who complain your substituted ingredients or anything else. You don’t need their negativity in your kitchen.

TIDBITS

1) It almost goes without saying that eggs are egg shaped. That’s because they are eggs. Elephants, however, are not egg shaped. Indonesia has both elephants and eggs. Indonesia has the Sumatran elephant. This elephant is the smallest Asian elephant. Indonesia also has small eggs.

2) So, we can conclude that the existence of eggs is a necessary requirement for elephants to live. It’s doubtful that elephants eat chicken eggs or any other egg type for that matter. So why do elephants only flourish around eggs? No consensus among the world’s culinary scientists. However, we can answer the age-old riddle, “Which came first, the elephant or the egg?”

3) It’s the egg.

4) Eggs are shaped like the bottom of bowling pins. Indeed eggs bowling was popular in Indonesia in May, 927. But its appeal waned rapidly as the egg pins always fell over and rolled into the gutters. Egg bowlers took to bowling one gutter ball after another. The easy success of knocking down an egg pin that was already down led to constant, lengthy disputes about scoring. Also striking an egg with a bowling ball inevitably shattered the egg. Indonesian bowling leagues used up eggs at a prodigious rate. Only the nation’s leaders could afford to eat eggs. This egg shortage made the common people restless. Indeed, egg anger rose to such a fever pitch, that the elite banned egg bowling. Serenity returned to Indonesia’s beautiful islands but, it had been a near run thing.

5) Then in 1299, Oswaldo Wooden came up with the happy idea of making bowling pins out of wood. The sport of bowling has thrived ever since.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D., critic

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Indonesian Nasi Goreng

Indonesian Entree

NASI GORENG

INGREDIENTSNasiGoreng-

1½ cups rice
1 pound chicken breasts
2 garlic cloves
2 green onions
1 shallot
1 inch gingerroot
1 large carrot
1 chile pepper, red or green
½ small cucumber
1 tablespoon sesame oil (1 additional teaspoon later)
2 tablespoons peanut oil
1 teaspoon sambal oelek or hot chili sauce
2 teaspoons fish sauce or Hoisin sauce or soy sauce
3 tablespoons ketjap manis or soy sauce
1 teaspoon dried shrimp
½ pound peeled and deveined shrimp
2 eggs

Makes 6 bowls. Takes 40 minutes

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder

PREPARATION

Cook rice according to instructions on packet. Shred chicken into thin strips. Mince garlic cloves, green onions, and shallot. Grind gingerroot into fine paste. Dice carrot and chile pepper. Peel and thinly slice cucumber.

Add 1 tablespoon sesame oil, garlic, green onion, ginger, shallot, and chile pepper to first pan. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion and shallot softens. Stir frequently. Add peanut oil, shredded chicken, carrot, sambal oelek, fish sauce, ketjap manis, and dried shrimp to pan. Sauté on medium-high heat for about 5 minutes or until chicken turns golden brown. Add shrimp and sauté on medium heat for 4 minutes or until shrimp turns orange.

While chicken and then shrimp sauté, add eggs and 1 teaspoon sesame oil to second pan. Fry eggs on medium heat for about 3 minutes or until done to desired level. Remove eggs and cut into thin strips. Add garlic/onion/gingeroot mix, shredded-chicken mix, rice, and egg strips to large serving bowl. Toss ingredients together. Garnish with cucumber slices.

TIDBITS

1) Shrimp can only swim backward.

2) The ability to walk backward is a highly praised trait among tour guides.

3) You’d think shrimp would be naturals as tour guides, but their limited life expectancy out of water and their, let’s face it, complete inability to speak is a real resume stain.

4) Uncooked shrimp are called “œgreen.” If you know this, you will win on JeopardyTM.

5) Male shrimp cannot get pregnant, just like human males.

6) However, in startling contrast, women usually give birth to one baby, while female shrimp pop out up to one-million eggs.

7) This is why baby-naming books for shrimp are extremely popular and long.

8) If you haven’t seen these books, it is because these books are only found on the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico or the sea floors of other seas where shrimp woo, marry, and engage in whoopee.

9) Shrimp raised in shrimp farms do not have access to baby-naming books. This is why captive shrimp always name their male babies, “Robert” and their female offspring, “Marie.”

10) The average shrimp is about 6″ long, while the longest extended to16″. In contrast, the average penis measures 5.1″, with the longest one topping out at 13.5″

11) Hence the famous saying, “Is that a shrimp in your pocket or are you happy to see me?”

12) People’s eyes have only 3 different photoreceptive cones, while shrimp have 16. We can only imagine what vivid colors these crustaceans see, what vivid art they could produce.

13) Unfortunately, shrimp only paint in water colors which run immediately in their underwater abodes. Their art disappears immediately. We never get to see their creations. So we eat them instead.

14) Shrimp are slowly but surely evolving defense systems to fight back. Indeed, the mantis already possesses fast and powerful claws. They can break aquarium glass.

15) You no doubt recall the chaos and the terror that occurred when ten-million mantis shrimps staged a mass break out of the aquarium at Fort Lagniappe, Louisiana. The entire town disappeared under a wave of crabby crustaceans. It was only when the Air Force bombed the shrimp with hot garlic-butter sauce that the threat was contained. Every May 9th since then has been known as National Shrimp Day.

16) To ensure manageable levels of shrimp, the federal government promotes the inclusion of bacon-wrapped shrimp in school lunches. If your school’s cafeteria does not carry this entree, by all means, contact your congressman at once.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bami Goreng From Indonesia

Indonesian Entree

BAMI GORENG

INGREDIENTSBamiGoreng-

2 chicken breasts
2 garlic cloves
12 ounces bami or medium-egg noodles
2 eggs
3 tablespoons peanut oil
½ teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 tablespoon sambal oelek (Indonesian red chili paste)
1 carrot
1 leek
1 onion
3 ounces medium peeled and deveined shrimp
4 tablespoons ketjap manis

SPECIAL UTENSIL

wok or Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Cut chicken breast into 1″ cubes. Mince garlic cloves. Dice carrot, leek and onion. Cook noodles according to instructions on package. Rinse and set aside. Beat eggs. Pour egg into pan. Cook on medium heat for 2-to-3 minutes or until egg hardens. Remove egg and cut into thin strips.

Put a drop of water in wok. When drop starts to bubble or move around, add peanut oil. Add chicken, garlic, ginger, pepper, and sambal oelek. Sauté on medium heat for 6 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink. Stir frequently. Add carrot, leek, and onion and sauté on medium heat for another 4 minutes. Stir frequently. Add shrimp and ketjap manis, and stir fry for another 4 minutes or until shrimp turns orangish/pink and is no longer translucent. This dish goes great with peanut sauce or a million dollars.

TIDBITS

1) Indonesia is the home of the great volcano Krakatoa. Incomprehensible amounts of ash issued from Krakatoa when it erupted in 1889. The ash in the sky darkened the world for days.

2) Today Krakatoa’s ash would be considered a health hazard. Schools would close as a health precaution. School kids everywhere would hope for volcanic eruptions. But too much ash would block sunlight to such an extent that plants couldn’t photosynthesis and so, die. Our end would come soon, delayed only the frozen burritos in our freezer. And if the only thing in our freezers was lutefisk, we’d wish the volcanic eruption would have taken us right away. So, be careful with your wishes.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Simple Loempias (Indonesian egg rolls)

Indonesian Entree

SIMPLE LOEMPIAS
(Indonesian egg rolls)

INGREDIENTSLoempias-

1 inch ginger root (or 1 tablespoon ginger powder)
2 chicken breasts
1 large carrot
1/2 pound white cabbage or cabbage
1/2 onion
1 8 ounce can bamboo shoots
2 tablespoons peanut oil (3-to-6 tablespoons later)
1/2 pound bean sprouts
1 1/2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 egg
24 egg-roll wraps
3-to-6 tablespoons peanut oil

SPECIAL UTENSIL

spice grinder
electric skillet

PREPARATION

Grind ginger root in powder with spice grinder. Dice chicken, carrot, cabbage, and onion. Add ginger. chicken, carrot, cabbage, onion, bamboo shoots, and 2 tablespoons peanut oil to pan. Sauté for 5 minutes on medium-high heat or until onions soften. Stir frequently.

Add bean sprouts, and soy sauce to pan. Cook for 5 minutes on medium heat or until chicken is done. Stir frequently. Remove from heat.

Scramble egg in small bowl. Place one corner of an egg roll wrap toward you. Put 2 tablespoons of the chicken/veggie mix about 1/3 of the way up from the bottom corner. Fold bottom corner up until it covers the mix. Fold sides in until they touch the mix. Roll up wrap from the bottom. Spread some of the scrambled egg under and on top of the flap of the egg-roll wrap.. (This keeps it from unraveling.)

Put 3 tablespoons peanut oil in electric skillet. Heat oil to 350 degrees. Be careful putting eggs rolls into hot oil. (It’s a good idea to wear an apron, long sleeves, and hold the skillet top in your other hand while doing this.) Fry for 5 minutes or until spring rolls turn golden brown. Turn occasionally to ensure even cooking. You will probably need to fry in patches. Add up to 3 tablespoons peanut oil as necessary.
TIDBITS

1) Cabbage is an essential ingredient in this recipe. Cabbage also has a rich history in literature and culture as can be seen by the following quotes.

“Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.”
– Mark Twain

3) “’Good worts! Good cabbage. Slender, I broke your head: what matter have you against me?’

– Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor

3) “Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man’s head.”
– Ambrose Bierce, A Devil’s Dictionary

4) “I want death to find me planting my cabbage”
Michel de Montaigne

5) “Idealist: One who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup”
– H. L. Mencken

6) “At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage”
– John Andrew Holmes

7) “Cabbaged” is the longest word that can be played on a musical instrument. It probably sounds awful.

8) Cabbage has been used by many for decades to ridicule America’s government. It goes like this:
Lord’s Prayer – 66 words
Ten Commandments – 297 words
Declaration of Independence – 1,335 words
Gettysburg Address – 271 words
Federal directive to regulate the price of cabbage – 26,911 words

Unfortunately  the bit about the federal directive isn’t true. There is no source for it. Sorry.

9) “ A good wife, rich cabbage soup, what more do you need?”
– Russian Proverb

10) “At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage”
– John Andrew Holmes

11) “Like warmed-up cabbage served at each repast, repetition kills the wretch at last.”
– Juvenal

11) “Cabbage, eww!”
– Little kids everywhere

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

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