Posts Tagged With: Egyptians

Pizza Crust 2

Posted on March 21, 2023 by pauldelancey

Italian Entree

PIZZA CRUST

INGREDIENTS

3 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup water
2½ tablespoons vegetable oil
¾ teaspoon sugar
¾ teaspoon salt
2½ teaspoons active dry yeast
no-stick cooking spray

UTENSILS

bread maker
16-inch pizza pan

PREPARATION

Measure out the flour and set aside. Pour the water into the bread maker. If you measure the water before the flour, the flour will stick to the sides of the measuring cup. Not the end of the world, of course, but a minor disruption in The Force, nevertheless.

Add flour, water, oil, sugar, salt, and yeast to the bread maker. Do not put the yeast directly on top of the salt. Salt is bad for yeast and yeast makes the dough rise. (“Ask not what your yeast can do for you. Ask what you can do for your yeast.”)

Set the timer or the menu on the bread maker to “Dough.” Wait the required time, probably a bit more than an hour. In the meantime preheat the oven to 400 degrees and liberally spray the pizza pan with no-stick spray. This will prevent the crust from forming a glue-like bond with the pan. Use this time to chop up any ingredients you’d like to add as toppings.

Take the dough out of the bread maker and roll it out until the dough covers the pizza pan. If you do not possess a rolling pin, any food can will do as long as it is at least 6 inches tall. It is best to spray the can or coat it with a thin layer of flour before spreading the dough.

After rolling, let the dough sit and rise for 30-to-60 minutes.

Add toppings as desired to the top of the dough. Place in the oven. Bake at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes. Ovens vary wildly in cooking times, so be sure to check after about 15 minutes and every few minutes after that. The cheese on top, a most likely ingredient for pizza, will go from golden brown to burnt in a few minutes.

TIDBITS

1) Egyptians used yeast more than 5,000 years ago.

2) Yeast is a tiny microorganism. My apologies to anyone named Yeast.

3) There are three types of yeast: baker’s, brewer’s, and nutritional.

4) The bread slicer was invented in 1912.

5) It’s getting quite difficult to buy bread that doesn’t have the evil high fructose corn syrup as an ingredient.

6) During General Grant’s siege of Vicksburg, Mississippi in 1863, the city’s supplies got so low that bread was made out of peas. It got moldy quickly and was universally considered to be gross.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Romanian Salata de Boeuf (Beef Salad)

Posted on August 10, 2021 by pauldelancey

Romanian Entree

SALATA DE BOEUF
(Beef Salad)

INGREDIENTS

1 pound thin beef sirloin
1⅓ pounds potatoes
2 carrots
2 eggs
⅓ cup green peas
1 cup diced or sliced pickles
½ cup pickled red bell peppers
1 cup mayonnaise (¼ cup more later)
2 tablespoons mustard
½ teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon salt
¼ cup mayonnaise
1 tablespoon fresh parsley

Serves 8. Takes 1 hour. No mayonnaise topping at front, so you can see inside.

PREPARATION

Add sirloin and enough water to cover. Bring to boil at high heat. Boil for 30 minutes or until sirloin is tender. Drain. Remove sirloin, let cool, and chop into ½” cubes. While beef cooks, add potatoes and enough water to large pot. Bring to boil at high heat. Boil for 25 minutes or until tender. Drain. Let potatoes cool. Peel potatoes and chop them into ½” cubes.

While sirloin and potatoes cook, add carrots and water to pot. Bring to boil using high heat. Boil for 15 minutes or until carrots becomes tender. Drain and cool. Chop carrots into ½” cubes. Add water to pot. Bring to boil using high heat. Carefully add eggs. Boil for 8 minutes for soft boiled and 12 minutes for hard boiled. Let cool. Peel and cut each egg into 6 slices.

Add sirloin, potato, carrot, peas, pickles, pickled red-bell peppers, 1 cup mayonnaise, mustard, pepper, and salt. Mix by hand until well blended. Add this mixture to a serving plate. Mold by hand into a flat, round shape like a layer of cake. Use spatula to coat cake-shape mixture with ¼ cup mayonnaise. Dice parsley. Garnish with egg slices and parsley.

TIDBITS

1) Prehistoric humans believed the Sun was a god. Egg yolks look like the Sun. Our ancestors reasoned that egg yolks themselves must possess a bit of divinity. The ancient Egyptians went further. Any animal that could birth so much godliness must itself be divine. The chicken became the preeminent Egyptian god. However, during the 18th dynasty, the priests of Amun Ra gained power and destroyed the Chicken Cult. Chickens would never again be worshipped. Their eggs, however, may be enjoyed in this dish.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Deviled Eggs

Posted on October 23, 2013 by pauldelancey

American Appetizer

DEVILED EGGS

INGREDIENTSdevdegg-

4 eggs
1/3 teaspoon paprika
1 1/3 tablespoons mayonnaise
1/3 teaspoon mustard powder

PREPARATION

Place eggs in a pot. Put water in pot. Bring water to boil. Cook for twelve minutes. (Read short sentences.) Do not overcook; a green coating on the yolk would look especially horrible for this recipe. Put eggs in bowl of cold water for fast cooling. Remove shells, cracking the eggs from the bottom first.

Cut eggs in half, lengthwise. Remove the egg yolks. Release your pent-up frustrations mashing them with your handy whisk. Mix in paprika, mayonnaise, and mustard powder.

Spoon this mixture back into the holes left by the removed yolks. Sprinkle only a lit bit more paprika over each entire egg for visual effect. Serve.

This is so easy. And it’s considered a gourmet food. Wow! There’s no excuse not to look suave and sophisticated at dinners or potlucks with this recipe.

TIDBITS

1) Paprika is by far the most popular spice in Hungary. The poppy seed is almost revered in that country. Hungarians refused to join the European Community until they were guaranteed unrestricted poppy-seed production. The European Union caved.

2) The ancient Egyptians boiled goose eggs. Apparently, those eggs are indigestible otherwise. A raw goose egg? Ugh. I’ll take the word of the ancients on this one.

3) Spicy stuffed eggs were eaten in 13th century Andalusia, a region of Spain. Spain discovered the New World in the late 15th century. Coincidence? Perhaps.

4) King Louis XV ate boiled eggs every Sunday. This practice ceased with his death.

5) The culinary term “deviled” arose in the late 18th century and referred to highly seasoned or fiery dishes.

6) My wife doesn’t like using the term “devil” in anything. So if you have another name for this dish, I’d appreciate hearing it.

7) Tampa’s baseball team used to be called the Devil Rays. They are now know as the Rays. So, other people must feel the same way.

8) My brother and I had egg holders when we were children in Australia. Neither of us ever played for the Rays. Coincidence? Perhaps.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Bajan Macaroni Pie From Barbados

Posted on June 4, 2013 by pauldelancey

Barbadian Entree

BAJAN MACARONI PIE

INGREDIENTSBajanMacaroni-

1 pound macaroni
2 onions
2 tablespoons butter
1 tablespoon banana ketchup
1 tablespoon mayonnaise
1 cup milk
1 tablespoon yellow mustard
3/4 cup grated cheddar cheese (1/4 cup more later)
2 tablespoons Bajan seasoning
2 teaspoons paprika
1/2 tablespoon parsley
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1 egg
1/4 cup grated cheddar cheese

SPECIAL UTENSIL

colander
8″ casserole dish

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Boil water in large pot on high heat. Put macaroni in pot. Boil macaroni for about 12 minutes or until tender Drain macaroni in colander.

While macaroni is boiling, dice onions. Put butter and onions in now empty pot. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onions are tender. Add banana ketchup, mayonnaise, milk, yellow mustard, 3/4 cup cheddar cheese, Bajan seasoning, paprika, parsley, pepper, and egg. Mix with hands. (Pretend you are throttling the people who make hated software upgrades.)

Put mixture in casserole dish. Sprinkle 1/4 cup grated cheddar cheese on top. Bake for 30 minutes or until top starts to turn brown.

TIDBITS

1) You should serve Burgundy alongside the macaroni you serve to your guests. Serving any other wine would be gauche.

2) When the ancient Egyptians entombed their dead they sometimes gave their departed ones cheese for their journey in the afterworld.

3) The first written recipe for mac and cheese comes from thirteenth-century Italy. It used fermented cheese. Hurray!

4) The box recipe for macaroni and cheese appeared in 1802. One year later, Napoleon crowned himself Emperor of France. He would plunge Europe into war after war for most of the next twelve years. Coincidence? Perhaps.

5) The phrase “Big Cheese” originally referred to people wealthy enough to purchase a whole wheel of cheese.

6) Kraft debuted its boxed mac and cheese in 1937. The Great Depression ends two years later.

7) In 1993, Crayola came out with the color, “macaroni and cheese.” We’ve had no global wars since then.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, humor, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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