misheard

Misheard Lyrics of the Beach Boys – 2

Posted on December 18, 2024 by pauldelancey

I used to believe in a lot of things. Then one by one,  I discovered that these beliefs to be false. In their place was . . . nothing, leaving me with an ever blander and more banal existence. The first tenet to fall to reality’s ugly axe was the Easter Bunny. Belief in Santa Claus vanished soon after. That was a tough time. I had to have another glass of milk, neat, to swallow that disappointment. These were childhood traumas. Adolescent beliefs soon fell like dominoes.

Only one cherish belief remained to this day. Now it too has tumbled. Is nothing sacred?

I honestly believed the Beach Boys incorporated mathematics into their work.

Anyway, I held to my heart with the desperate fervor of a near-drowning man holding onto a log that the Beach Boys sang “coastline craze” instead of “cosine craze” in the brilliant song “Catch a wave.” Doesn’t it change the meaning of the song just a bit? You bet. I am bereft of joy. My life no longer has meaning.

Anyway, the real lyrics are:

“And baby, that’s all there is to the coastline craze
“You gotta catch a wave and your sittin’ on top of the world”

And what I heard all these years:

Misheard Lyrics #8

 

Where, of course B stands for Beach Boys and c stands for cosine craze.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of the Cars – 2

Posted on October 26, 2024 by pauldelancey

Are there many bands more exciting than the magnficent Cars?

There invigorating songs place us smack firmly into a world of pleasing possibilities. They make us want to go ahead. Every time.

Well, no.

Only if you hear the correct lyrics.

The song “Let’s Go” foretold good times The true lyrics include:

I don’t want to hold her down
Don’t want to break her crown
When she says, “Let’s go”
“I like the nightlife, baby”
She says, “I like the nightlife, baby”
She says, “Let’s go”

And now the misheard lyrics which kinda change the meaning:”

Misheard lyrics #23

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
­

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Archer Woman Misheard Lyrics

Posted on October 10, 2024 by pauldelancey

Maurice Chevalier songs had big hits in America and in France. The debonaire Frenchman even made it big in Hollywood. He truly was a magnificent and popular singer of the 20th century. So it comes as a massive shock to many to discover his immense popularity in England during the Hundred Years Wars (1347 – 1453). Indeed no English army rampaged around the medieval French countryside without singing Monsieur Chevalier’s most beloved songs, collectively known as “Les Chansons de Chevalier.”

All this begs the question, how did M. Chavalier get so popular way back then? Social media.

Anyway, Chavalier’s beautiful song “Louise” starts with the lyrics:

“Wonderful Oh, it’s wonderful
To be in love with you.
Beautiful! You’re so beautiful,
You haunt me all day through.”

However, Archer Woman, mighty warrior that she was, felt this song spoke directly to her because she thought it went:

­

Misheard lyrics #22

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of Nat King Cole

Posted on August 1, 2024 by pauldelancey

Is there anything more soothing than listening to the magnficent Nat King Cole?

His magnificent voice transfers us to a happier world.

Well, no.

Only if you hear the correct lyrics.

The true lyrics for the song “For Sentimental Reasons”  include:

“I love you
For sentimental reasons
I hope you do believe me
I’ll give you my heart”

And now the misheard lyrics which change the meaning to a love song between archeologists.

Misheard Lyrics #21

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of Cher

Posted on May 23, 2024 by pauldelancey

Is there anything more evocative than listening to the magnficent Cher?

Her soaring voices places us smack dab into a world world generated by her stirring lyrics. Every time.

Well, no.

Only if you hear the correct lyrics.

The song “Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves hinted at prostitution. The true lyrics include:

“Gypsys, tramps and thieves
We’d hear it from the people of the town
They’d call us gypsies, tramps and thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down”

And now the misheard lyrics which kinda change the meaning:

Misheard lyrics #19

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Misheard Lyrics of KC and the Sunshine Band

Posted on April 3, 2024 by pauldelancey

The heart-pumping lyrics of “Boogie Shoes” by KC and the Sunshine Band turns us all into dancing fiends, ready to dominate the disco floor. The song alone is an aerobic exercise.

The repetitive lyrics are simplicity itself. So, understanding the song should be easy peasy. The mood the song engenders should also be obvious.

Well, no.

Only if you hear the correct lyrics.

The true lyrics are:

“I wanna put on my, my, my boogie shoes
“Just to boogie with you, yeah”

And now the misheard lyrics which kinda change the meaning:

Misheard lyrics #18

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Bible Verse

Posted on February 20, 2024 by pauldelancey
The Bible has brought good news, comfort, and inspiration to billions of people over the millennia.

That is, if it’s heard correctly during the chuch readings.

Am I the only one, who when little, misheard “peace on” during a Christmas service to be “peas on?” This changed the meaning of the following verse and made the mysteries of the faith even more mysterious.

Here is the real verse:

“Glory to God in highest heaven, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.”

Luke 2:14

And here is what I heard.

Misheard Bible verse #1

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of Traditional Scottish Folk Song

Posted on December 30, 2023 by pauldelancey

The haunting lyrics of “My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean” evokes feelings of deep sorrow. This sorrow derives from the fact the Pretender to the British Throne, Bonnie Prince Charlie, lies across the English Channel. Or perhaps someother body of water if had been struck with a feeling of wanderlust. Did they have Club Med(tm) then?

Or, a Scotsman is pining for his love, Bonnie, who for some reason took a cruise to the continent. As after the disastrous defeat at Culloden in 1745, the victorious English banned all support for Bonnie Prince Charlie. So, apprehended Scotsmen could say, “Why no, constable, I wasn’t singing about the Prince, I was singing about my lass, Bonnie.” And the constable would have to walk away.

And so goes the story for the correct lyrics.

But in or grammar school song time we heard, “My body” instead of “My bonnie.”

This turned the story into something existential and eerie.

The true lyrics are:

“My Bonnie lies over the ocean,
My Bonnie lies over the sea,
My Bonnie lies over the ocean,
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me.

[Chorus]
Bring back, bring back,
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me, to me.
Bring back, bring back,
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me.”

Eventually, our teachers told us that we were to sing “My Bonnie.” Of course, this made us sing “My body” even louder. We were ever so clever back then. The thought just struck me today that “My bottom lies over the ocean” would be hilarious as well. Apparently, I’m still as brilliant as I was back then.

And now the misheard lyrics:

Misheard lyrics #17

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of Anna Kendrick

Posted on December 3, 2023 by pauldelancey

The superb Anna Kendick sings the great song “Cups,” aka “When I’m Gone,” in the excellent movie Pitch Perfect.
The true lyrics include:

“You’re gonna miss me by my walk, you’re gonna miss me by my talk, oh”

But didn’t you hear?

“You’re gonna miss me by my walk, you’re gonna miss me by my taco”

I mean who wouldn’t hear “taco?”

“Talk, oh” sounds exactly like “taco.” It does! It really does. And why not? The tasty taco is the world’s greatest food.

Eating something other than a taco is like cheating on your true love. So, is it any wonder that the incredible Ms. Kendrick sings about the divine taco? Is it any wonder we miss a woman with a taco?

Misheard Lyrics #16

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Misheard Lyrics of Selena Gomez

Posted on November 20, 2023 by pauldelancey

The superb  Selena Gomez had a big hit with great song “Good for you.”
The true lyrics include:

“I’m on my 14 carats
I’m 14 carat
Doing it up like Midas,”

I, however, heard:

“I’m on my farting carrots
I’m farting carrot
Doing it up, like my ass.”

Ms. Gomez certainly seemed to be rather earthy. She also showed herself to be rather proud of her stupendous, carrot-spawned, public farts.

Okay. Then given the exciting, alternative lyrics, the rest of the song seem to continue this rather curious vein. Oh well, each to her own taste.

But hey, I’m not too proud to admit I misheard the lyrics. Can you tell I use subtitles when I watch TV?

Misheard lyrics #15

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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