about me

Busy Days

Posted on December 3, 2024 by pauldelancey

This will be a short post as I was busier than a spreadsheeter who had six hours of data entry disappear with the presentation due in five hours. I did save the Earth yesterday, so that’s something.

P.S. Does anyone know where to find wild-boar meat? Thanks.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Busy, Busy Day

Posted on November 27, 2024 by pauldelancey

Woke up. Fell out of bed. Dragged a comb across my head. Then I left the Beatles’ song to have a much need massage. It went for an hour and my muscles must have been super tight as the masseuse worked hard on me. I almost said, “Stop.” I’ve said that maybe once in my many years of physical therapy. Then I helped my friend got her prescription. I then did about 90 minutes of latch hooking, which is part of my eye therapy. Did about 90 minutes of driving.

Back home I did finances, ground spices, cleaned some in the kitchen. I am now making two pumpkin pies.

Gosh my back hurts.

In case I get too busy tomorrow:

 

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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How I Hope to Improve My Outlook

Posted on November 7, 2024 by pauldelancey

My stunt double

Events and health have depressed me greatly.

I hope to become calmer and perhaps happier by making recipes, cooking, blogging, reading books, and not following what happening out there.

 

– Paul De Lancey

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My Grandma’s Wisdom – Trouble

Posted on October 27, 2024 by pauldelancey

I generally was a well behaved child and I tried to be so at my Grandma’s house. But even mostly behaved children sometimes get rambunctious. In times like these, my grandma would give me the following bit of wisdom. And by the way, I never found out what good trouble was.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
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My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Number Two Son Is Now a CPA

Posted on October 19, 2024 by pauldelancey

Number Two Son’s CPA double

Well. the title of this post gives it away, but I don’t care. I’m so proud of him.

My son is now an official Certified Public Account. Hooray!

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: about me, finance | Tags: , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Worried About Safety of My Honda Car

Posted on October 17, 2024 by pauldelancey

 

And here it is

I have had my Honda HR-V for over 20,000 miles. In that distance, I’ve had:

1) One of the safety systems take control of the steering wheel and veer the car sharply to the edge of an overpass. Thank goodness, I successfully fought its attempt to move me away from a semi and over the edge of the bridge onto the road below. (Now, this can be a difficult onramp.) There’s little approach before entering the right lane of the freeway. Sometimes there’s a semi still in that lane. This involves driving briefly on the shoulder. It’s a bit tricky, but not difficult for an alert driver.)

The decision for this problem was utterly simple for Honda’s safety system. Avoid the semi and instead slam the side of the bridge and quite possibly plunge to the road below.

2) My windshielf cracked due to a tiny, tiny pebble.

Me: Okay, fix it Honda.
Honda: Not so fast, we need to order the part.
Me: Okay, order the part.
Honda: Not so fast, we don’t even now when we’ll get it. It could take montns. (I’d be driving all that time without a windshield!)
Me: Is there anything you could do?
Honda: You could call Honda national to see if they have it and if not, ask them to expedite the windshield as an emergency measure.
Me: Since you’re Honda dealership, could you call Honda National?
Honda: No. you have to call national.

It went rather downhill after that.

3) Slamming on the brakes for no apparent reason. I was not going faster than the flow of traffic and there were no cars in front of me, only to the left.

I’m sorry this is not a funny post.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
­

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Very Tired

Posted on October 16, 2024 by pauldelancey

My stunt double

I haven’t slept well for some days now. So, I’m very tired. I did go to my crafts group and worked on my Minnie Mouse latch project. Then I shopped for three special meals. It took  a long time. I had planned to make Strawberry Balsamic Chicken but was  too tired and had sad graham crackers instead,

I’m too tired to make a special picture, so my Stunt Double is going to fill in for me instead. He’s rather a nice guy.

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Paul’s Awesome English Dictionary – Today’s Phrase:  Airport Eyes Syndrome

Posted on October 15, 2024 by pauldelancey

How many times has this happened to you? You’re standing still in an airport terminal looking at the departures board when someone slams into your side. Or you see them coming. You know you’re in their field of vision. You don’t move, confident that they’ll take steps to avoid you. Your confidence is misplaced.

Or you’re inside the plane waiting to find your seats. The person before you and your toddler son happens to be a man toting a humongous carry-on bag. He could lift his bag straight up into the overhead bin, but instead makes a large sweeping motion with his bag to get the necessary height. One small worry, your toddler’s tiny head is in the way of the gargantuan carry-on bag. Will the enormous bag kill your young son when it crashes into his tiny skull? Or will it merely cause irreparable brain damage? No, it won’t. Your belief in humanity has prepared you for such a thing and you easily block the turd ball’s bag. The turd ball merely registers mild surprise when his bag stops. (This actually happened to me! May the turd ball rot in Hell for all eternity eating lutefisk for each and every meal.)

Ahem. There must be a phrase for this sort of blindness.

And now there is:

TODAY’S AWESOME PHRASE

Airport Eyes Syndrome

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Awesome entry #51

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Number Two Son Runs a Marathon

Posted on October 13, 2024 by pauldelancey

 

I am so proud. Number Two Son finished the Chicago Marathon about an hour ago. This is his fourth marathon. One of those was the Boston Marathon.

 

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Woot! Beams with pride.

 

 

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.
­

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

 

 

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What I Did Today

Posted on October 11, 2024 by pauldelancey

Venus. It’s hot.

Woke up, got up, showed, and dressed. I graciously accept a medal for Achievement in Adulting.

Went to my office. Saw no bunnies outside my window. Got bored. Dabbled in finance. Accidently destablized the entire global economy. Restablized everything before anyone noitced. So no harm, no foul.

Then I went to physical therapy for problems with my lower back. I really got a work out. All sorts of muscles were stretched. I felt as fit as Achilles, before an arrow shot into his heel killed him. Culinary historians call this problem an Achilles’ Arrow.

Any way, I felt fit! After 30 minutes of intense exercise, I was prepared to conquer the Summer Olympics. I called the International Olympic Committee, IOC, to tell them I was ready. They said sorry, that the Olympics already took place earlier this year.

What a bummer. I swallowed my disappointment by eating a huge meatball sandwich for lunch; no need to keep in shape. I discontinue my excercise regime.

I got groceries. I bought a pair of slip-on shoes. May they’ll help me win gold medals in the next olympics

3:22 pm: I activate my time machine. I wait 60 seconds for it to function.

3:23 pm: It’s exacly one minute later. My time machine works.

I am so proud. I shall call it a time piece.

3:25 pm: I drive home, taking full use of the miracle of internal combustion.

5:57 pm: America gets invaded by Venusians. My home is the site of the initial invasion.  They say that they’re conquering our planet because it’s so much cooler than theirs. I offer them some homade ice cream. They like it very much. So much so that they call off their attack with the proviso that I give them ice cream every year. I agree and even offer to throw in a big bag of homemade chocolate chips with each visit. They can’t believe their good luck. We part, having become the best of friends.

My frenetic day left me exhausted, so I relaxed by watching mind-improving comedies on TV.

I do hope you behaved yourselves while I was preoccupied.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: about me, what this country needs | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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