Posts Tagged With: infinite

Back to the Fridge

Posted on August 30, 2024 by pauldelancey

I started the day by contemplating the infinite. Having thusly penetrated all the secrets of the universe, I attempted a minor reorganization of the fridge. Why not? I was on a roll.

Space needed to be made in the fridge. Amelia Earhart* or Waldo could have been hiding there. Then for reasons I still don’t comprehend the reorganizing project spun wildly out of control. Soon, I found myself getting more effecient placement of all my cooking appliances. This naturally, led to reordering of about 50 jars of flours, salts, rices, etc. Contents of jars sitting quietly, minding their own business of the shelves suddenly found themselves funneled into a smaller jars.

Having opened the Pandora box of reorganization, I next tackled rearranging some 100 small containers of spices and herbs. Again, contents made their way into smaller bottles. A scant six hours later, I went back to the fridge and moved things around.

I took out my frustration by running. I did the mile in 3 minutes 20 seconds, which would have been a record, but no one was around to witness it. Bummer.

* = Can you spell Amelia Earhart?**

** = Oops, kinda made it easy, didn’t I?

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: about me, De Lancey's Daily Deeds | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

What I Did Today

Posted on April 9, 2024 by pauldelancey

I got a standing ovation!

I got up and contemplated the infinite; it’s quite complex.

After that I showered and dressed.

I went to one of my exercise classes. Helped a friend I had to hurry with my shopping for I am in the Berlin Circus. Rushed to the airport. I did my act. The crowd gave me a standing ovation. That made me very happy.

Flew back from Germany. Made an appointment for physical therapy. (Ongoing issue, I did not injure myself at the circus.) I cooked beef and bean burritos for dinner. Now, I am taking it easy. Whew.

I hope you behaved yourself when I was out of the country.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

 

 

Categories: what I did | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What I Did Today

Posted on January 31, 2024 by pauldelancey

My time on Mars was necessarily brief

1) Woke up. The streak continues. Go me!

2) Showered, Cleanliness is next to godliness.

3) Renewed CD.

4) Briefly contemplated the infinite.

5) Went to monthly massage therapy. She spent much more time on my head and neck than usual because I walked into a window at last week’s craft class.

5b) If you’re wondering does walking into a window hurt, the answer is yes.

6) Ate lunch.

7) Went to the library for this week’s crafts session. Made progress on my latch-hook project.

8) Did not walk into a window at any time.

9) Help with friend’s CD question.

10) Used extra-springy trampoline to bounce my way to Mars.

11) Had to return to Earth right away as I can only hold my breath so long.

12) Fortunately, NASA had left a trampoline on Mars during its last mission there.

13) Bounced my way back to Earth. Boy, did I take a big gulp of air!

14) Ordered some place markers for the Great Latch Hook Project.

15) Made quesadillas for the natives.

Behave yourselves.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: what I did | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

I Simplify Theme Parks

Posted on October 31, 2021 by pauldelancey

 

Orange World, what fun!

People, especially kids, love theme parks. However, dissension often splits apart the happy family. Everyone wants to go to a particular ride or attraction. The bickering never ends. When an agreement is finally reached, you and the surly siblings enter into a seemingly infinite line.

So if the lengthy lines mean you’re never really going to get on a ride, why not go to Orange World instead? The genius of Orange World comes from the fact that its one line does not merely appear to be infinite, it is infinite! And with one line, there will be no discussions about which one to join. And how is this one line infinite? It’s a circle! Like the second hand on a clock, you shuffle endlessly forward around the circle.

Sure, you won’t get on a ride at Orange World, but you weren’t getting on a ride at the major theme parks anyway. And at one-third the price of a major theme park, you can’t afford to not venture into Orange World.

Why is it called Orange World? In the middle of the circular line sits a giant orange. It’s soothing to look at an oversize orange. And don’t we all need more serenity in our lives? I know I do. Go to Orange World and find the inner peace you’ve been craving. Take your family to Orange World. Take them today.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

John Wallis and Infinity

Posted on October 21, 2021 by pauldelancey

Sure, Greek philosophers, and other smarty pants after them, talked up a storm now and then about the concept of infinity. But none of it wrote down a symbol for it. So they all got forgotten, except for Socrates. And as we all know, Socrates was forced to take hemlock for not coming up with a symbol for infinity. The ancient Athenians took their proto-calculus discussions seriously.

One day, British mathematician and doughnut lover, John Wallis, was sitting at his table looking at two alluring pink doughnuts. His next door neighbor, Carl La Fong sat across from John gazing longingly at the pink delights. The great British painter, John Hoskins, happened to be there. This is his painting, “Two Pink Doughnuts.” It hangs in the Tate Museum in London, England.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“May I have one of your pink doughnuts?” asked La Fong.

“No, you may not,” said Wallis, “I love pink doughnuts beyond all measure.”

“Would you, could you, give me one pink doughnut if you had three?” asked La Fong.

“No, I would not. I would eat all three. I would eat them just with me.”

“Would you, could you, give me one pink doughnut if you had four?”

Wallis shook is head. “No, I would not. I would eat all four. I would eat them by the door.”

“Would you, could you, give me one pink doughnut, if you had an infinite number of pink doughnuts?”

“No, I would not. I would eat an infinite number of doughnuts.” Wallis scratched his head. “Say, what would the symbol for infinity look like?”

“Like this, you greedy man.” La Fong squished the two doughnuts.

And, lo and behold, John Hoskins painted the squished doughnuts. The wildly popular painting is on display at the British Science Museum in London. It’s called, “Infinity.” Here it is:

 

 

 

 

 

 

And so due to Wallis, La Fong, and Hoskins, we now have the symbol for infinity. Sir Isaac Newton used it to develop calculus. Now you know.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: history, proof you cannot deny | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.