Posts Tagged With: Comic Chef

Green Goddess Dressing

American Appetizer

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GREEN GODDESS DRESSING

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INGREDIENTS
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4 anchovies*
2 tablespoons lemon juice
¾ cup mayonnaise
½ cup sour cream
2 tablespoons diced fresh chives
½ tablespoon fresh dill
2 garlic cloves
⅔ cup fresh parsley
¼ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon fresh tarragon
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* = 2 teaspoons anchovy paste or ½ the anchovy bits in a 2-ounce can.
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SPECIAL UTENSIL
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food processor or blender
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PREPARATION
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Add all ingredients to food processor. Blend until smooth. Use now. Transfer unused portion to Mason jar. Store in refrigerator. Keeps for 1 week.
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TIDBITS
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1) Nearly all dinosaurs died out 66 million years ago (66 mya) when a bloody minded comet slammed into the Earth. The Dinosaur Greeting Card company died out as well. Both are mourned. Only a small percentage of dinosaurs survived this mass extinction. Those that did evolved into birds. But they never lost their dinosaurial–if that is indeed a word–traits. So a condor is a bird. An eagle is a bird. The pigeon that craps on your car is a dinosaur.
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2) The two-ounce hummingbird is a dinosaur. As of press time, the largest dinosaur, amphicoelias fragillimus weighed 100 to 150 tons. That’s quite a weight variance. Perhaps Amphi Fragilli alternated between dieting and binge eating.
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3) Anyway, gigantic mobile plants such as: estranikon (tarragon), anitho (dill) and maintanos (parsley) walked the land after the comet crash. Alas, for this vibrant, burgeoning genus, kinita votana, dinosaur birds and mammals stalked the active plants as an abundant source of vitamin-rich food.
 Noting that their mobility garnered the attention of their predators, mobile plants evolved into stationary and much smaller plants, like the ones we grow or buy at the store. This dish, Green Goddess Dressing honors the survival of these herbs.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Exactly How I Want It

and wrapped and bagged. Is that ok?

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Nepali Chicken Thukpa

Nepali Soup

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CHICKEN THUKPA

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INGREDIENTS
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½ pound rice noodles
2 garlic cloves
¼ cup fresh cilantro
2 green chiles
2 green onions
1 small yellow or white onion
1 bell pepper
2 carrots
⅔ pound boneless, skinless chicken parts
2 tablespoons olive oil
⅛ teaspoon asafoetida* or ½ teaspoon dried chives
1 teaspoon minced ginger
¼ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon timur powder* or Szechuan pepper* or red pepper flakes
½ cup chopped tomatoes
½ teaspoon turmeric
5 cups chicken broth
1 tablespoon lemon juice
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* = These can be found online. Use sonic obliterator on those who complained if you substituted.
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SPECIAL UTENSIL
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sonic obliterator
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Serves 4. Takes 1 hour.
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PREPARATION
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Cook noodles according to instructions on package. Be sure to stir occasionally so noodles don’t stick together. Drain. Rinse with cold water. Mince garlic. Seed green chiles. Dice cilantro, green chiles, green onions, and yellow onion. Julienne bell pepper and carrots. Cut chicken into strips 1½” long and ¼” wide.
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Add olive oil, garlic, and yellow onion to pot. Sauté at medium-high heat for 4 minutes or until yellow onion softens. Stir frequently. Add chicken strips. Sauté at medium heat for 3 minutes or until chicken is cooked. Stir frequently. Add asafoetida, bell pepper, carrot, cilantro, minced ginger, green chile, green onion, pepper, salt, timur powder, tomatoes, and turmeric. Stir until well blended. Add chicken broth. Bring to boil using high heat. Stir enough to prevent burning. Reduce to low heat and simmer for 10 minutes. Stir occasionally. Add lemon juice and stir. Divide noodles into bowls. Ladle chicken soup over noodles.
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TIDBITS
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1) There are reasons why the Nepalis love Chicken Thukpa so much. It’s soup. Who doesn’t love soup?  It has chiles in it. Who loves chiles? People in hot climates, such as Mexico and Kenya.
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2) But just because you love to put spicy chiles in your food doesn’t necessarily mean you can abide your land’s hot, sweltering weather. You leave your homeland in search of cooler climes and you take along with you the seeds of your beloved in chiles.
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3) In fact, culinary historians and anthropologists say the first such migration occurred when Lucy of Olduvai Gorge, a hominid, butterfly* collector, persuaded her tribe to search out cool, pleasant pastures where chicken herds teemed. * = Butterfly fossils are hard to find.
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4) And so Lucy’s tribe trekked north. They got lost many times as their GPS didn’t work and the men refused to ask for directions.
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5) They continued their march to the European-North American land bridge, evolving along the way and relaxing with a good game of bridge during rest stops.
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6) A long time later, give or take a year, the Evolving Hominids–Isn’t that a great name for a rock ‘n’ roll band?–found Mexico where they naturally united with the Polloan Pueblo. The combined chile-seed-carrying Oldupo People crossed over the North American-Asian land bridge and eventually found themselves in what is now modern-day Nepal.
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7) The Oldupo loved the cool breezes coming down from Nepal’s Himalayan mountains and decided to settle down and finish their evolving there. So, we’ve explained the Nepali’s love of chile, but what about chicken? Chicken Thukpa has chicken it. What about that?
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8) The meteor of 66 million years ago that wiped out nearly all dinosaurs, did not result in the extinction of the gigantic Pullumosaur. This dinosaur chicken stretched to 90 feet in length and stood 80 feet high. It’s very size intimidated the heck out of the predators, who noted the Cretaceous maxim, “There’s nothing more dangerous than colossal giant chicken.”
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9) The pullumosaurs managed to dodge the extinction of its fellow dinosaurs with the simple expedient of burying their head in the sand until the meteor event ran its course.
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10) More than a bit skittish, the dinosaur chickens departed for a new home free of meteors. By a strange coincidence, the pullumosaurs–after many exciting adventures–found themselves in modern-day Nepal.
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11) Unfortunately, Nepal simply didn’t have enough food to support countless herds of gigantic chickens. Over time, evolutionary pressures shrank the pullumosaur in size to our current chicken.
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12) When the Oldupo of tidbit 7) arrived in Nepal, they naturally wondered if chickens would be tasty. Would they go with chiles? They wondered and wondered until Juana Lucy first ate one. “They taste just like chicken,” she shouted. “I bet they’ll make a great soup mixed with chiles.” Ever since, the Nepali descendants of the Oldupo have loved Chicken Thuka Soup. And so do I.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, history | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Remastering Beethoven

Remastering The Beatles and the Rolling Stones, because you know you’re a better musician than Hall of Fame rock ‘n’ rollers.

What’s next?

­– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Yoga Instructor On AD and BC

Yoga Instructor #8

­– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: yoga instructor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What? What? Confused About Parking

What could they possibly mean?

Confused #1

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­– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: confused | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Wanda Wunder Wonders About Barbie(tm) Dolls

I saw a photo about an army of 8,000 terra cotta soldiers made many centuries ago in China. I then though of Barbie Dolls. I have too much time on my hands.

Wanda Wunder #33

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Wanda Wunder | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

You Need to See a Lion Taking a Sunbath

Life can be stressful. Demands on your time prove overwhelming. Perhaps you’ve been given impossible must-complete-or-else projects. Maybe you’re just plain worn out reestabling dominance over the other alpha males wanting to take over your harem. Whatever the case, you need to chill out. And what better way than contemplating a lion taking a sunbath.

You need to see #32

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: you need to see | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Food to Die For: Paul’s 365 Meals of Murder, Mayhem, and Mischief – September 17

September 17: This entree honors British troops leaving  for South Africa to fight in the Boer War.*
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Soldiers never like leaving a place, whether it’s their beloved homeland or an exotic land that they’ve come to admire. So then, how much worse is it when you’re leaving to fight the Boers in South Africa? Very much worse. That enemy invariably fires back at you. With malicious intent. Suppose you’ve embarking from India with its verdant scenery and oh so good curry. As far as you know, South Africa has none of that. “Why am I going there?” you asked yourself.

Because you’ve been ordered to do as part of the war effort. And remember you’re not only one forced to go to South Africa. In the 1860s, British sugar-cane plantations needed ever more workers. So they imported Indians to work as indentured servants.

Being forced to get shot  repeatedly or to work without salary for a specific number of years is never fun. But since you’re already there, why not avail yourself of the amazing, tasty curry dishes this wonderful land has to offer?

The meal you should serve to commerate this day:  Bunny Chow

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Celebrate the drive and determination of the British soldiers and subjects who brought along their love of curry by sampling my favorite South African dish.

 

BUNNY CHOW

 

INGREDIENTSbunnychow

1 medium onion
3 medium potatoes
4 cardamom pods
1 cinnamon stick
½ teaspoon fennel seeds
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 tomatoes
2 pounds chicken breasts or lamb
3 fresh curry leaves
3 tablespoons Durban masala (See recipe)
⅓ cup chicken stock
2 1-lb whole white loaves
1 tablespoon fresh cilantro

Serves 4. Takes 1 hour.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

Dutch oven

PREPARATION

Dice onion. Peel potatoes. Cut potatoes into 1″ cubes. Add onion, potato, cardamom pods, cinnamon stick, fennel seeds, and vegetable oil to Dutch oven. Sauté at medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens. Stir constantly. Remove from heat.

Dice tomatoes. Cut chicken into 1″ cubes. Add Durban masala, Add tomato, chicken, curry leaves, and Durban masala to Dutch oven. Cook using medium heat for 5 minutes. Stir frequently. Add chicken stock. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 30 minutes or until potato is tender and chicken is no longer pink inside. Remove Dutch oven from heat. Discard cinnamon stick.

Slice bread loaf in half along its length. Use sharp knife to cut off most of the soft white bread from each half. Leave ½”-to-1″ of bread crust along the edges and bottoms. (The scooped out bread can be made into bread crumbs.) Ladle potato/tomato/chicken mixture into each hollowed-out loaf half. Garnish with coriander. Repeat for second bread loaf.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: meals of murder | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Wanda Wunder Wonders About Taxes

Wanda Wunder #33

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Wanda Wunder | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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