Posts Tagged With: chocolate

Bacon & Chocolate, A Powerful Force

What if the Bacon & Chocolate Party actually influenced this presidential election? Remember the fuss in Florida in 2000? There were several analyses of who should have won that state. One had Al Gore winning by three votes. It’s entirely possible Bacon & Chocolate could get three votes in a state in November

Bacon & Chocolate – For a Tasty and Influential Tomorrow.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

 

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Foolproof Plan To End Serious Crime

People committing felonies will not be allowed to have any bacon or chocolate while serving hard time.
I know this is severe, but what person would EVER commit a serious crime knowing the consequence of being without these two delicacies year after year? No one.

I rest my case. What this country needs is tough love.

Vote Bacon & Chocolate in November for a Safe and Tasty Tomorrow.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Affordable Care Act

First there was Governor Romney’s health-care legislation.

Then there was President Obama’s health-care act.

Now great news! Here’s

BACON & CHOCOLATE PARTY’S

Comprehensive AFFORDABLE CARE ACT >>>>>>>

Vote Bacon & Chocolate in November

For a Tasty  Tomorrow

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Bacon & Chocolate Campaign Poster

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Bacon & Chocolate Party Forms Superpac

Dear Bacon & Chocolate supporters, the sad fact remains despite our best non-existent efforts,
our glorious party hasn’t been able to raise vast sums of money for our campaign. Indeed, we’ve raised the negligible sum of $0.00. So, we are forming our own superpac.

B&C hopes to raise just as many millions as our main competitors, Mr. Romney and President Obama. As one of our brilliant cabinet members said,  “Why not ask the pork producers?” Indeed, it is in their best interest to get us elected. Same goes for the chocolate makers.

I can hear you saying, “But won’t you beholden to the bacon & chocolate interests?”

We certainly will. But with cheap bacon & chocolate spreading o’er the land, who cares? With millions and millions behind us, Bacon & Chocolate cannot lose in November. Vote Bacon & Chocolate for a tasty tomorrow.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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The Bacon And Chocolate Party Will Win In November

 See?  Dated 7/24.

Bacon & Chocolate Party has, through the use of its revolutionary time
machine, uncovered proof of B&C’s upcoming win in November. The
photo on this blog depicts President Paul De Lancey coming down the
steps of Air Force One.

Mr. De Lancey, upon being shown this picture, said, “Who would have
thought we’d win what with our party being a write-in in every state
and having a budget of $0.00? It just shows you the American public
wants bacon and chocolate over politics as usual.”

Indeed. Good luck, President De Lancey.

 

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

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Chocolate Haikus

I want chocolate.
Give me all the chocolate
And no one gets hurt.

My sweetheart left me.
But he left the chocolate.
So, it’s all okay.

Oh my chocolate,
Wonderful gift of the gods,
You make the sunrise.

Milk chocolate and
Dark chocolate, yum, yum, yum
You’re the basic food groups.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Bacon & Chocolate, humor, poems | Tags: , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Bacon Haikus

Bacon haikus is the new wave of literature.

I started off with one that oozes elegant simplicity.

Bacon, my bacon.
Bacon, bacon, my bacon.
Bacon, my bacon.

Did Rembrandt like bacon?
I like to think he did or
I’ll sell his paintings.

Bacon tastes so wonderful.
Makes  jobs for heart specialists.
Bacon tastes wonderful.

Pilgrims farming the
Old West always took bacon
God bless America.

America went to
War to defeat the Nazis
And protect bacon.

America is great
With its fine chocolate
With its crisp bacon.

Don’t care what others
Will say, but give me bacon
Or some chocolate.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Be The Boss Of Your Federal Department – Part 2

All you have to do is follow my blog, pauldelancey.com and like it. In return, when elected President of the United States on the Bacon & Chocolate Party  ticket, I will give you a job as the head honcho of whatever federal department is available. (See below for taken slots and list of federal agencies.) If you can’t decide, but still wish to serve your country at a handsome salary with great health care, I will randomly pick a department for you to run.
http://www.usa.gov/directory/federal/index.shtml

May 21, 2012 – Directory listing for federal agencies and departments:A.

What a deal! What a country!

Our lineup so far:

President: Paul De Lancey
Vice President: Daphne Anne Humphrey

Avoiding Labor: Stephen Parrish
Education: Jan Buckner, Amy Buckheister Gettinger
Extraterrestrial Welcoming Committee: Denise Hemphill
Health Human Services And Cooking: Shauna Roberts
State: Franchesca Todd
Secret Service: Maria Kuroshchepova
Treasury: Andrea Isom

Ambassadorships:
Vatican: John Rucker

Bacon & Chocolate for a Tasty Tommorow

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Bacon & Chocolate, politics, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Be The Boss Of Your Very Own Federal Department

All you have to do is follow my blog, pauldelancey.com and like it. In return, when elected President of the United States on the Bacon & Chocolate Party  ticket, I will give you a job as the head honcho of whatever federal department is available. (See below for taken slots.) If you can’t decide, but still wish to serve your country at a handsome salary with great health care, I will randomly pick a department for you to run.

What a deal! What a country!

Our lineup so far:

President: Paul De Lancey
Vice President: Daphne Anne Humphrey
Treasury: Andrea Isom
State: Karina De Lancey
Avoiding Labor: Stephen Parrish
Education: Jan Buckner, Amy Buckheister Gettinger

Bacon & Chocolate for a Tasty Tommorow.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | 2 Comments

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