Posts Tagged With: cookie dough

I Hurt Myself Making Cookies

Stunt Big Toe from Stunt Man

Seems difficult to do but I did. I warmed by spilling one cookie-dough round into the oven and few more on the floor.

Then . . .

I tripped on the part of the broiler that was sticking out by a little. But my left big toe managed to catch it. I fell/flew forward, twisted in mid-air and broke my fall with my left knee. Final damage: headache, twisted neck, twisted back, twisted left ankle, and throbbing left, big toe, and hurt left knee. I thought briefly that my big toe was broken, but it’s better now. Oh and I managed to pull the broiler drawer all the way open with my big toe.

You may say that baking is not a full-contact sport, but I respectfully disagree.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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The Looming Revolution

They ran out of banana splits

It’s way too hot to use the oven or stove today. So, as part of my errands I went to the supermarket for ingredients to make banana splits. My family has been looking forward to having them today. Banana splits are heaven.

Then avoidable tragedy struck. I forgot to get hot fudge sauce at the store. I know! The horror! You can’t have a banana split without hot fudge sauce.

I don’t have all the ingredients to make hot fudge sauce. I don’t want to go out to a peoply supermarket a second time. Number One Wife is busy. Number Two Son is studying. He says he’ll bring home some hot fudge when he finishes.

Meanwhile, minute after minute goes by and no banana split. People are getting as tense as when they’re about to stick a knife into one of those cardboard cyclinders of premade cookie dough.

Update: no hot fudge sauce. People get surlier and surlier. The spirit of Marie Antoinette visits me. She’s beside herself. She says, “The continued absence of banana splits prompted the French Revolution.”

And still no hot fudge sauce for the banana splits. I shall be barricading myself in my office soon. Wish me luck.

 

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

 

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Fried Cheese

Czech Appetizer

FRIED CHEESE
(Smažený Sýr)

INGREDIENTS

1 pound Edam cheese or Gouda
2 eggs
1½ tablespoons milk
⅛ teaspoon salt
⅔ cup flour
1 cup breadcrumbs
4 cups olive or vegetable oil (Enough to cover fried cheeses)

Serves 4. Takes 30 minutes.

SPECIAL UTENSIL

Frying pan large enough to cook four cheese squares. I know a large frying pan is not normally considered a special utensil. But it really helps makes fried cheese look nicer when you can cook them all at once. Bits of breadcrumbs can blacken succeeding batches.

PREPARATION

Cut cheese into 4 slices ½” thick.. Add eggs, milk, and salt to mixing bowl. Beat with whisk or fork until well blended. Add flour to 1st plate. Add breadcrumbs to 2nd plate.

Heat oil using medium heat. Oil is hot enough when a breadcrumb dropped in will start to dance. Dredge cheese slices through flour until completely coated. Dredge cheese slices through eggs until completely coated. Dredges cheese slice through breadcrumbs until completely coated.

Gently place coated cheese slices in oil. (Carefully, the hot oil might splatter.) Fry using medium heat for 2 minutes on each side or until it turns golden brown. Remove immediately and pat dry with paper towels. Goes well with tartar sauce as a dipping sauce or with French fries.

TIDBITS

1) The human race abounds with geniuses. Some of them make medical breakthroughs. Others invent devices that make space exploration and planetary excursions ever easier. Then there are the culinary geniuses that find news foods to deep fry.

2) The following is a partial list of foods deep fried by these visionaries: bacon slathered with mayonnaise, bubble gum, butter, Cadbury Cream Egg(tm), cookie dough, corn on the cob, flowers, gravy, guacamole, jelly beans, Mars(tm) bars, Nutella(tm), salsa, sauerkraut, watermelon, and White Castle(tm) burgers. My pick for the most innovative deep-fried dish is the tarantula. It does exist, really.

 

Paul De Lancey, Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: cuisine, international, observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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