Posts Tagged With: Sahara

Lamb Stew From Western Sahara

Western Saharan Entree

LAMB STEW
(Mreifisa)

INGREDIENTS – BREADMreifisa-

4 cups flour (1 additional tablespoon later)
1½ cup water
¼ teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon flour

INGREDIENTS – STEW

1 pound lamb
2 garlic cloves
2 medium onions
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 cup beef broth
1 cup water
½ teaspoon salt

SPECIAL UTENSILS

rolling pin
cookie sheet
Dutch oven

Makes 3 bowls. Takes 55 minutes.

PREPARATION – BREAD

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Add 4 cups flour, water, and salt to large mixing bowl. Knead with hands for 5 minutes or until ingredients become a well mixed ball of dough . Dust flat surface with 1 tablespoon flour. Add dough to flat surface. Flatten dough with rolling pin until it is ½” thick. Place flattened dough on cookie sheet. Bake at 375 degrees for 30 minutes or until bread starts to brown. Set aside.

PREPARATION – STEW

While bread bakes, chop lamb into ½” cubes. Dice garlic cloves and onions. Add garlic, onion, lamb, and olive oil to Dutch oven. Sauté on medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until onion softens and lamb cubes brown. Add beef broth, water, and salt to Dutch oven. Bring to boil using high heat. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 45 minutes or until lamb is tender.

Crumble bread and divide equally among bowls. Pour equal amounts of stew into bowls.
TIDBITS

1) Mreifisa is an anagram for “I fire Sam.”

2) Sam is not a common name in Western Sahara.

3) In fact, Sam is a tour guide. He lead a group of foodies to Western Sahara to eat mreifisa, all perfectly normal.

4) But he headed east to rebel-held territory and got captured. Why did Sam take his charges east?

5) Because someone asked Sam, “Would he eat mreifisa on a beast. Would he eat in the east?”

6) “Yes,” said Sam while being held in a snake-filled pit. “I would eat on the sand. I would eat if it’s bland.”

7) “Would you,” said his captors, “eat it in the sky? Would you eat it while you die?”

8) “I would eat it in this life. I would eat it with my wife.”

9) “Would you eat it with a lord? Would you eat it on a sword?”

10) “I would eat it with a whisk. I would eat it with lutefisk.”

11) His blond, blue-eyed captives blanched at that. “You eat lutefisk?”

12) “Yes!” said Sam. “I’d eat lutefisk with a gnu. Do you want some lutefisk, too?”

13) “No, lutefisk does so stink. If we ate lutefisk, we’d need a shrink.”

14) Sam said, “Try it, try it I implore. If you don’t, I’ll bring more.”

15) “No,” said the leader Abu, “A thousand years hence, our tribe left Sweden. No more lutefisk we’d be eatin’.”

16) “Would you eat lutefisk in a tree? Would you eat it with a bee ?”

17) Abu said, “We would not eat it in a car. To not eat it, we’ve traveled far.”

18) Sam brightened when he said, “You’re not giving it a chance, that is plain. I’ll get you lutefisk flown from Spain.”

19) “Oh that lutefisk makes us ill We’ll release you, yes we will.”

20) Even though Sam and his tour group got released from the snake pit, some of the tourists seized on that event to demand their money back. So, I had to fire Sam.

21) Would you, could you fire Sam? Would you, could you eat this stew of lamb?

– Chef Paul

LutheranCookbook

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, are available in paperpack
or Kindle on amazon.com

The cookbook is also available as an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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Ice Cubes and World Peace

Antarctic Entree

ICE CUBES

INGREDIENTIceCubes-

water

SPECIAL UTENSILS

glacier
pick axe
Siberian husky
panniers
Van Gogh painting
Twinkie
monastery
Porsche

PREPARATION – If you live near a glacier.

Take pick axe to glacier. Shatter a square foot of glacier ice into little ice cubes with your pick axe. Put panniers on Siberian husky. Put ice cubes in panniers. Have husky follow you back to your home. Will the lock on your door freeze up before your get your key in it? I hope not.

PREPARATION – If you have automatic ice maker in your refrigerator.

This method is much easier and safer than the above method. Many people get refrigerators just for this reason. Simply put your cup or bowl in the proper opening (Consult your refrigerator manual for proper placement of said cup or bowl.) Press the ice maker’s lever back. Ice cubes will fall into your cup. You will be happy.

Note, there will be an option with your ice maker for crushed ice. Use this daring option only when your are ready. In the meantime, play it safe and use the factory setting for ice cubes.

PREPARATION – If your refrigerator does not have an automatic ice maker.

You will have to go to an antique store and buy an ice cube tray. Fill tray with water. Open freezer door on refrigerator door. Spill water from tray. Leave door open. Fill tray again with water. Put tray in freezer. Close freezer door. Wait several hours while water in tray freezes and the moisture you let in the freezer when you left the door open too long forms into layers of frost so thick you could hide a wooly mammoth in it.

Open the freezer. Remove wooly mammoth. Remove ice cube tray. Try to remove ice cubes by lifting that lever. Bust lever. Curse. Hit counter top with ice cube tray. Chip counter top. Shatter ice cube tray. Watch ice cubes fly all over. Watch an ice cube hit your Van Gogh painting. (Why didn’t you buy a refrigerator with an automatic ice cube maker if you can afford a Van Gogh?) Watch ice melt on painting. Watch paint run. Assess the value of your new Van Gogh finger painting. It’s not high. Collapse to the floor crying. If you do not have a TwinkieTM nearby to calm you down, you will withdraw from society and join a religious order.

PREPARATION – if you have a car

Drive to the supermarket and buy a bag of ice. If you can afford it, go to a gourmet foods store and buy the brand, “Grandma’s Recipe.”

TIDBITS

1) Ice is frozen water

2) It’s harder than water, but not as hard a diamonds.

3) You can’t cut glass with an ice cube like you can with a diamond.

4) However, you could let your ice cubes partially melt and refreeze them into one big, weirdly shaped ice cube. You could shatter a window by throwing this huge cube at it.

5) You can’t do the same with diamonds. Diamonds don’t melt when taken out of the freezer. Not even if you live in the Saharan Dessert.

6) The French made great efforts to conquer and colonize the Sahara from the late 1800s to early 1900s. With every step taken into the great sandy interior, the French infantry found itself farther and farther away from its sources of ice.

7) Sure, the French possessed lots and lots of ice houses in mainland France. What civilized nation of that time did not? However, these French ice houses were far, so far away from the sand dunes of the Sahara and its relentless Sun.

8) No ice houses in the Sahara, no ice cream. No ice cream, no soldiers willing to enlist in the French army. The French army found itself reduced to enlisting the scum of the Earth in a special unit, the French Foreign legion. These men were so beyond accepted social norms that some of them had never ever put an ice cube in their root boor, let alone dine elegantly on three scoops of vanilla ice topped with chocolate syrup. Oh, oh, I can’t go on…

9) Just let me note that the United States acquired Alaska in 1867 and the Philippines in 1898. For various and manifold reasons which are beyond the scope of this recipe, we were forced to relinquish control of one of these two lands. Alaska has millions of square miles of ice. The Philippines do not. The United States kept Alaska.

10) Indeed, the untapped supply of ice cubes in Antarctica, estimated here at 1,456,000,000,000,000 ice cubes is so tempting, that in 1959 all the great nations of the world signed a treaty pledging themselves never to claim this frozen land.

11) And now the world is happy. Well, mainly.

– Chef Paul

4novels

My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World,  and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com

As an e-book on Nook

or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com

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