This blog is directly inspired by the talented and hilarious Kathy Minicozzi who was in turn inspired by the renowned humorist David Sedaris.
Here are the things I resolve not to do today. Takes a deep breath. Lets it out. Okay Paul, you cannot do this.
1) I will not cook or eat lutefisk.
2) I will not foment revolution anywhere.
3) I will not lose a sock in the dryer.
4) Because I will not do clothes today.
5) I will not engage in the illicit fruitcake market.
6) I will not voluntarily upgrade any of my electronic devices.
7) I will not race to the be the first to reach the South Pole. I’ve already lost. It happened about a century ago. Why try?
8) I will not attack the weeds in my backyard with my weed whacker for another day. The tenuous truce still holds.
9) I will not sing at any karaoke bar. The whole world rejoices.
10) I will not befriend North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un on Facebook.
11) I will not say, “I love you,” to my printer.