Posts Tagged With: mobs

Prosciutto Arugula Pizza

Italian Entree

PROSCIUTTO ARUGULA PIZZA

INGREDIENTS

2 tablespoons flour
1 pizza crust
2 tablespoons olive oil
1¼ cups shredded mozzarella cheese
6 prosciutto slices
1 cup arugula leaves

SPECIAL UTENSIL

pizza pan

Serves 4. Takes 30 minutes.

PREPARATION                                                                                        A 15th century map of the world

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Dust pizza pan with flour. Put pizza crust on pizza pan. Spread olive evenly over pizza crust. Sprinkle cheese over crust. Evenly arrange prosciutto slices over cheese. Bake for 15 minutes or until cheese melts and starts to turn golden brown. Remove pizza from oven. Evenly sprinkle arugula leaves over cheese and prosciutto. Slice and serve.

TIDBITS

1) Until 1492, a wide range of people, 0% to 100%, believed the world was flat. Anything that got too close to the edge of the Earth would fall off. This is why golf took so long to become popular. Enthusiasts could never be sure that wouldn’t drive their golf ball over the Earth’s edge.

2) Pizzas were also unpopular. Look at the above pizza. Look at a map of the Earth. Among other things, both are flat. A hardy few tried to eat pizzas, but a meatball or a prosciutto slice would always fall off the edge. “See?” people would say, “this proves the Earth is flat. Why would I want to eat something that reminds me why I can never play golf?” Golf-deprived populations grew surly. By the 1400s, angry mobs took to the streets, brandishing golf clubs. The aristocrats could see the writing on the wall. The people needed a diversion.

3) Then on 8 am, June 15th, 1399, the Renaissance began all over Europe. Art would pacify, even entrance the mobs. Kings, dukes, and princes everywhere combed the mobs for talented artists willing to trade their useless golf clubs for canvases and paint brushes, marble and chisels. This is how got Michelangelo, Da Vinci, Botticelli, and many others.

4) In 1522, a naval expedition circumnavigated the world. This proved the Earth to be round. People could play golf! Meatballs falling off a pizza, no longer provoked images of golf balls flying into space. However, with the advent of golf matches and pizza parties, the rulers of Europe no longer saw the need to fund the arts, so the Renaissance began to wind down. Oh well.

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Categories: cuisine, history, international | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Jugo de Avena (Oats Milk Drink)

Dominican Breakfast

 

JUGO DE AVENA
(Oats Milk Drink)

INGREDIENTS

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4 cups milk or evaporated milk
1 cup oats
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
6 tablespoons lemon or lime juice
1½ cups ice cubes

SPECIAL UTENSILS

blender
pitcher

Makes 5 cups. Serves 5. Takes 30 minutes.

PREPARATION

Add milk and oats to blender. Blend at high speed for 5 minutes or until oats are quite tiny. Add cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla extract. Blend at medium speed until sugar dissolves completely. Chill in freezer for 20 minutes or until cold.

Remove bowl from freezer. Pour into pitcher. Add ice. Slowly add lemon juice while stirring continuously.

TIDBITS

1) Jugo de avena’s taste satisfies everyone. It also cools and refreshes.

2) A satisfied, cooled, and refreshed person is a calm and sedate person.

3) That’s why clever riot police hurl canisters of jugo de avena at the seething, surging mobs. One sip of jugo de avena makes even the most ardent protester happy. Serene protesters stop rioting. Good will abounds.

4) Other riot police hurl tear-gas canisters at the protesters. This angers the protesters more. The riot intensifies.

5) Why haven’t we heard of riots being quelled with jugo de avena? Because these disturbances stop so quickly that the press can never get there in time. Makes you think.

I have now blogged for 100 days in a row.  : )

 

Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

 

Categories: cuisine, international, observations | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

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