Posts Tagged With: how to use

How To Use #4, Clothes Washer, The First Steps

Dear readers,

Today, you’ll learn the first steps on how to use your clothes washer.

Many of you know how to wash clothes. Hurrah! Good for you. However, many of you afraid to even try. The biggest fear when learning how to use a new-fangled appliance, or anything really, is how to start.

1) Identify you clothes. Possibly they look like these.

2)  Put your clothes in a basket. One you become a pro at this, you can sort your clothes into darks and lights.

3) Put your dirty garments in the clothes washer, not the dish washer, Oh, no, no, no.

Try these steps and before you know it you’ll be filling washers with the best of us. Please read the forthcoming part two.

And as always, cleanliness is next to godliness.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: how to use, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How To Use #3, Coffee Grinder

Dear readers,

Today, you’ll learn how to use your electric coffee grinder. You may have an electric one that looks like this.

Here are the two things you must know if you wish to master the art of grinding coffee.

1) Plug it in. Pretty much every electric gizmo from the coffee grinder to biggest super computers need electricity. There’s really no way around this step.

2)  If your coffee grinder requires two lids, “For the love of God, Montressor,” use both lids. The poor soul who used the grinder in the picture used only one of the lids. You can see the result. He now wanders Skid Row periodically flinging his arms to the sky and muttering, “Why? Why? Why?”

Try these steps and before you know it you’ll be grinding coffee with the best of us. And as always, bon appétit.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How to Use, #2, Kitchen Burner

Dear readers,

Today we learn how to use your stove’s burner. You may have an electric one that looks like this.

Here are the two things you must know if you wish to master the art of cooking with a burner.

1) Turn it on. Your burner won’t cook anything unless you turn it on. No matter how patient you are.

2)  Turn it off when you’re done. You don’t want any ouchies on your hands.

Try it! And as always, bon appetit.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: how to use, humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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