soap

Bergamot Lavender Charcoal Soap

Posted on November 6, 2023 by pauldelancey

BERGAMOT LAVENDER CHARCOAL SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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2 pounds charcoal soap base
½ teaspoon bergamot essential oil
½ teaspoon lavender essential oil
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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soap mold
spray bottle
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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PREPARATION
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter.
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Cut charcoal base into 1″ cubes. Add charcoal cubes to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in 30 second intervals. Stir after every time. Add bergamot and lavender essential oils.
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Pour  into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear.  Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) The following claims for charcoal that come up repeatedly are that it detoxifies, exfoliates, and calms. That’s pretty good as charcoal soap even cleans youl.
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2) Culinary soapologists also say that charcoal soap gives you the following superpowers:
You will never need more than 30 seconds to find your car keys and glasses.
Vampires will never attack you. If you add garlic to your charcoal soap, neither will werewolves.
DMV lines will be half the length they are for other soap users
Your memory will improve to the point that you will always find the TV remote.
Orphan socks will become a thing of the past.
Chickens will no longer run away from you.
All people named Bert or Sarah will always say, “Hi.”
So will elephants. Be prepared to run.
Staff from both political parties will ask you to run for office for them.
People will be much more attracted to you. If that becomes a problem, rub yourself with garlic.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

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Pumpkin Shea Butter Soap

Posted on November 2, 2023 by pauldelancey

PUMPKIN SHEA BUTTER SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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½ pound pumpkin pulp* (no stringy bits)
1 teaspoon orange mica powder
2 teaspoons pumpkin** spice
2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol
2 pounds shea butter soap base
1 teaspoon cinnamon leaf essential oil
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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* = Use the pumpkin pulp from your Halloween pumpkin or possibly pick up a free Halloween pumpkin from your supermarket on November 1.
** = Or substitute with 1 teaspoon cinnamon, ¼ teaspoon ground cloves, ½ teaspoon ginger, and ¼ teaspoon nutmeg.
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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food processor
soap mold
spray bottle
microwave
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Puree pumpkin pulp in food processor and set aside. Add orange mica powder, pumpkin spice, and 2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Cut shea butter base into 1″ cubes. Add shea butter base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 seconds. Stir after every time. Add orange mica powder/isopropyl mix and cinnamon leaf essential oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 6 minutes. (This inhibits pumpkin bits from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add pureed pumpkin. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter. Pour into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) Spoiler alert, this soap, Pumpkin Shea Butter Soap uses pumpkin.
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2) So does pumpkin pie.
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3) So do many recipes from Africa.
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4) Pumpkins have other uses.
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5) Like jack o’lanterns.
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6) Like pumpkin bowling ball.
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7) Culinary sport historians assert that pumpkin bowling started in the northern states of the Union in 1865.
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8) Because every Northern soldier returning home after the end of the Civil War was given 50 pumpkins when mustered out of the army.
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9) This meant northern towns and cities became inundated with pumpkins.
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10) Pumpkins that would eventually rot. Ugh.
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11) There were only so many pumpkin pies and African entrees featuring pumpkins that people would eat.
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12) So naturally, pumpkin lawn bowling leagues sprang up in any town greater than 6 people.
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13) Didn’t the pumpkin bowling balls break apart when they hit the bowling pins? Yes, they did. But remember, each returning soldier returned with 50 pumpkins.
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14) Pumpkins still remained. Pumpkin Baseball flourished for two weeks in the summer of ‘65.
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15) Frank Butler and Bartolomeo Diaz of Madison, Wisconsin thought up the game of basket ball on June 15th, 1865.
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16) Pumpkin basketball was such fun. The 39 seconds of the first game thrilled the local fans.
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17) But it took only two shots to demolish the pair of pumpkins. Madison would not get anymore pumpkins until harvest time in the fall.
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18) By which time, people plain forgot about Pumpkin Basket Ball, what with the long days devoted to harvesting and eating pumpkin pies.
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19) This is why June 15th is only remembered as a day to pay taxes and not by the National Basketball Association.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: history, soap | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Orange Goat’s Milk Soap

Posted on October 19, 2023 by pauldelancey

ORANGE GOAT’S MILK SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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1 teaspoon orange mica powder
2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol
2 pounds goat’s milk soap base
¾ teaspoon orange essential oil
2 tablespoons fresh orange zest*
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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* = zest from 1 orange or 2 tsp dried orange zest
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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soap mold
spray bottle
microwave
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Add orange mica powder and 2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Cut goat’s milk base into 1″ cubes. Add goat’s milk base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 seconds. Repeat until completely melted. Stir after every microwaving. Add orange mica powder/ isopropyl mix and orange essential oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 5 minutes.. (This inhibits orange zest from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add orange zest. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter. Pour into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) Orange Goat’s Milk might come from an orange goat. Or maybe milk from goats is orange, which would be way cool.
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2) It’s not clear. More uncertainty has been introduced into your life. You might find that you’ll have trouble sleeping .If so, be sure to drink some warm orange goat’s milk before going to bed.

– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: observations, soap | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Strawbery Shea Butter Soap

Posted on October 10, 2023 by pauldelancey

STRAWBERRY SHEA BUTTER SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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½ pound fresh strawberries
1 teaspoon red mica powder
2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol
2 pounds shea butter soap base
1 teaspoon strawberry fragrance oil
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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soap mold
spray bottle
microwave
soap slicer (optional)
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Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Remove stems from strawberries. Puree strawberries and set aside. Add red mica powder and 2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Cut shea butter base into 1″ cubes. Add shea butter base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 seconds. Stir after every time. Add red mica powder/ isopropyl mix and strawberry fragrance oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 5 minutes.. (This inhibits strawberry bits from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add pureed strawberry. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter. Pour into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) What if you need to compete in Olympic weightlifting and then go right away to a fancy dinner where you’re going to propose to your true love? You really don’t want to show up sweaty and stinking. You truly want to shower and scrub yourself all over with Strawberry Shea Butter Soap. You’d be clean and smell like happiness. But what if you don’t have the time for a shower? What to do? May I suggest ditching your cast-iron weights in favor of ones made from Strawberry Shea Butter? The heat generated from you workout will make the strawberry soap melt all over you. You’ll be getting squeaky clean while you compete for the gold.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: soap | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Strawberry Glycerin Soap

Posted on September 16, 2023 by pauldelancey

STRAWBERRY GLYCERIN SOAP

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INGREDIENTS
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½ pound fresh strawberries
1 teaspoon red mica powder
2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol
isopropyl alcohol or butter to coat molding
2 pounds glycerin soap base
1 teaspoon strawberry fragrance oil
isopropyl alcohol to spray away bubbles forming on soap
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SPECIAL UTENSILS
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soap mold
spray bottle
microwave
soap slicer (optional)
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­Makes 10½ bars, 1″ wide. Takes 3 hours 30 minutes.
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PREPARATION
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Remove stems from strawberries. Puree strawberries and set aside. Add red mica powder and 2 tablespoons isopropyl alcohol to small mixing bowl. Mix with fork until well blended.
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Spray silicon mold with isopropyl alcohol or rub with butter.
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Cut glycerin base into 1″ cubes. Add glycerin base to large glass measuring cups. Melt base in microwave with timer set at 30 second. Stir after every time. Add red mica powder/ isopropyl mix and strawberry fragrance oil. Stir with knife until well blended. Let sit for 2 minutes or until well blended.. (This inhibits strawberry bits from settling to the bottom of the soap mold.) Add pureed strawberry. Mix with knife until well blended.
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Pour into soap mold. If desired, lightly spray bubbles with isopropyl alcohol to make them disappear. Let soap sit for 3 hours. Use soap slicer to cut soap into slices 1″ wide.
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TIDBITS
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1) If you arm your military with strawberry glycerin soap, it will smell nice. However, a nice scent never terrifies the enemy. If you make your strawberry soaps with nitroglycerin, they will explode with horrifying results. Indeed, culinary strategists believe the Pentagon is already mailing such soaps to America’s enemies. NGSSs, nitroglycerin soaps, are expected to work best on foes who place a premium on cleanliness.
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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.

Categories: soap | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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